


I'll Follow You Down

by cliche_ridden



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Melodrama, Memory Loss, Miscarriage, Pregnancy, Rape/Non-con Elements, Stillbirth, Suicide Attempt, Underworld
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-07
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-05-12 11:18:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 61
Words: 110,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5664217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cliche_ridden/pseuds/cliche_ridden
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Starts in 5a but deviates to an AU 5b. Regina and Robin suffer a devastating loss while trying to deal with Emma as the dark one and as a result, Regina makes a sacrifice that leads everyone to follow after her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It starts off as one thing and then deviates into another and then another. There's probably about five different fics in here to be honest.
> 
> If you're hear for the Snow Queen it's a long way into it. 
> 
> I don't have a beta so all mistakes are mine, including my annoying habit of jumping tenses, I've tried to catch that as much as possible but sorry.
> 
> TW: depression, suicide, miscarriage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea where this came from. I had a thought about what if Regina's curse was actually worse than stopping her getting pregnant, what if it stopped her carrying to term and I started this while watching 5a, so I encorporated that it into it. I started this probably mid-way through 5a so it's a little different, no Captain Dark One and Emma was actually dark and I'd heard the rumours about 5b being about them going to hell so I encorporated that.
> 
> This has kind of grown into a monster, I never intended it to be as long as it's turning out to be...but, I just had to get it out of my head.
> 
> I don't have a beta so all mistakes are mine, including my annoying habit of jumping tenses, I've tried to catch that as much as possible but sorry.
> 
> TW: depression, suicide, miscarriage, stillbirth, mentions of the canon non-con and implications of marital rape.
> 
> And of course, I own nothing, all the characters belong to the television gods.

Chapter One

“It’s gone, isn’t it?” Her voice is barely more than a hoarse croak.

Robin comes round with a start, he’d been dosing in the chair next to her bed, exhaustion having overcome him. 

It’s phrased like a question but it’s really a statement and they both know it. She can feel it, the gnawing absence of what had been.

The pained expression on Robin’s face is answer enough to confirm what she already knows, she looks at him for a moment and then in a flash, her expression changes, hardens into a mask reminiscent of the one she wore as ‘the evil queen’. She looks up to the ceiling, focusing on a spot only she can see.

Robin sighs quietly, he isn’t sure how long passes before she pulls her right hand away from where it’s resting on the bed, under his, he had been holding it like a life line since he began his vigil at her bedside. She begins to turn onto her left side, to face away from him, he sees the pain it causes her flash across her face before she bites her bottom lip and her expression returns to its neutral mask. She ignores the searing pain across her abdomen, it’s only what she deserves is the thought that flashes through her mind. She stops for a moment as the IV in the crease of her right arm starts pulling, she looks at it for a moment, confused as to what was causing another, albeit considerably less severe, source of pain, then before Robin can stop her she rips it out in one quick motion and rolls around onto her side.

“Regina!” Robin stands up next to her bed, he isn’t sure how to deal with this, with her, she’s closing herself off and even though he’d half expected it, it feels like he’s been kicked in the chest. 

The noise from an alarming IV pump attracts a nurse who very quickly assesses the situation from the door. She moves over to the IV pump, switching it off before turning her attention to Regina. 

“I need to see your arm Ms Mills.” The nurse gestures to her right arm. Regina is focused on the wall now, staring blankly. Her gaze never wavers as she limply surrenders her arm to nurses’ ministrations and the blood that has come from the site of the IV drip is cleaned and a band aid applied. As soon as the nurse is done, Regina pulls her arm back and crosses them over her chest again. 

Robin winces, turning away for a moment, the sight of the blood too fresh a reminder of how he had found her earlier. This doesn’t escape the notice of the nurse, who offers him a kind smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. Robin takes a deep breath, attempting to steel himself for what he was sure was going to come. He hadn’t been sure what kind of reaction to expect from Regina, but this, this was about the worst possible scenario he had come up with as he’d sat at her bedside over the last three days. 

“Do you need something for the pain Ms Mills?” The nurse asks, experience telling her that despite Regina’s attempts to mask it, she had to be in severe pain, surely about to be made worse since she had just removed her source of analgesia. 

Regina doesn’t respond, she continues to stare blankly, the hardened neutral mask she’d adopted remaining on her face.

“Ok, well, you just let us know, we’re right outside.” The nurse tells her, gently laying a hand on her upper arm. Regina’s arm twitches almost imperceptibly as she fights not to flinch at the touch, it doesn’t go unnoticed by either Robin or the nurse. 

Robin turns away from Regina, towards the door as the nurse starts to leave, he sighs, running a hand through his hair. The nurse stops, putting a hand on his arm.

“You ok?” She asks him, offering the same kind smile, she’d been trying her best to look after him over the last few days, as well as Regina. 

The look Robin returns her is answer enough.

“Yeah.” She moves toward the door another step, then stops, turning back to Robin. “Try to get her to at least drink something. Her body has been through a major trauma, she needs to keep her strength up.” She instructs before opening the door and closing it behind her.

Robin moves to the left side of the bed, pulling up a chair and sitting down. He tilts his head, taking in her appearance. She’s chalk white, her lips pale and chapped. Her eyes are watery and bloodshot and as he looks at her a tear escapes and rolls across the bridge of her nose. A strand of her hair has come forward and fallen onto her face. He gently reaches out, tucking the hair behind her ear and using his thumb to wipe away the tear.

“Please talk to me my love.” He pleads, resting his hand on her face, using his thumb to brush across her cheek. She doesn’t respond and he pulls his hand back and leans forward, resting his elbows on the bed and dropping his head into his hands. 

“Go.” It’s barely a whisper, he blinks, not even sure that he heard her. 

“Regina…” He starts to form an argument in his mind, to counter whatever it is she’s going to say, he’s adamant he won’t leave her.

“I’m sorry.” She’s still speaking so quietly he struggles to hear her, “I failed you. It’s my fault. Please, go.” She turns her head and looks at him as she says the last part, he feels as if she’s looking through him. The pain he sees in her eyes is almost too much for him to bear. Almost as quickly, she’s back to staring at the wall.

He gently touches her face again, turning it towards him, forcing her to look at him, he needs her to hear this. “Regina, my love, you could never fail me. This was not your fault, it wasn’t anyone’s fault. I love you, please don’t shut me out.”

It’s enough to break the façade she’d been barely holding onto since coming round. A heart wrenching sound escapes her mouth as tears begin to fall in earnest. She grips onto him like she’s literally clinging for dear life, pulling at his sweater, desperate to be closer to him now. He ends up on the bed, his arms around her, her head on his chest, her hands still gripping at his sweater even as her knuckles turned white. He kisses her forehead, running his fingers through her hair and he whispers to her over and over that he loves her, that it will all be alright. He loses track of time, how long they lie there like that before her cries die down and she succumbs to sleep, her body weak from the ordeal it has just been through. He closes his eyes for a moment, just to rest them, he’s been awake for far too long and before he knows it, he’s succumb to sleep too.


	2. Chapter 2

_3 Months Earlier_

Since their return from Camelot, Robin and Regina had settled into a routine, he and Roland had moved from the camp into her home and while Robin was still in a period of adjustment to living indoors, they had both settled in comfortably enough. It was clear to everyone that Roland adored Regina and she felt the same way about the small boy, lavishing him with attention, as did his new big brother Henry. Though everyone in town was always on edge and distracted and worried about Emma, life was still going on. 

If it wasn’t for the constant threat of the dark one, not to mention the pregnant wicked half-sister he could almost describe his life as idyllic, Robin mused one morning as he came downstairs to find Regina and Roland in the kitchen. 

“Good morning.” He greeted Regina and Roland with a smile, walking around the island counter, giving her a kiss on the cheek and ruffling his son’s hair affectionately as he walked back around to lean on the counter from the other side. “What on earth is going here?” He marvelled at the mess on the counter, his son kneeling on a chair apparently responsible for most of it.

“We’re making pancakes.” Regina smiled, pouring some batter into a pan and pointing to the stack she’d already made. “Why don’t you serve them up and I’ll tidy up in here.” 

Robin smiled, rounding the counter again and giving Regina a proper kiss this time. “Are you sure? I can help you to clean up after we’ve all eaten?” He suggests. 

She shakes her head as she lifts the last pancake from the pan and turns to add it to the already too big pile. “Go, I’ve got this.” She smiles.

Robin lifts Roland off the chair where he’s been kneeling to ‘help’ with making the pancakes and places him on the ground before lifting the plate of pancakes along with some cutlery and syrups and heading to the dining room. Roland’s face is soon a gooey mess of syrup along with some chocolate from a few chocolate chip pancakes Regina had made especially for him. They had made a sizeable dent in the stack when Robin realised he hadn’t heard any noise from the kitchen in a while. 

“You keep eating little man.” Robin smiled at his son as he stood up to check on Regina. 

He found her in the kitchen, hunched over the sink, arms bracing herself on the counter at either side of it, taking deep, exaggerated breaths. 

“Regina, what’s wrong?” He asks, rushing over to her side and placing a hand at her lower back before gently rubbing. 

She almost jumps out of her skin, not having heard him approach, too focused on controlling her wayward stomach. “Nothing.” She replies instantly, her lifelong need to never show weakness kicking in before she can stop herself. She lets out a breath, relenting, reminded herself that this is Robin, her Robin. “I just suddenly felt very nauseous. It’ll pass.” 

She tries to offer a reassuring smile but he takes in her appearance and a thought suddenly occurs to him.

“Were you sick this morning?” He asks. He’d been in that in between state where you’re aware of what’s going on but you’re not fully conscious, still dreaming. He’d heard the sound of her throwing up in their bathroom this morning but incorporated into whatever he was dreaming about.

“It’s nothing.” She reassures him. “See, I’m starting to feel better already.” She straightens up. 

He looks at her sceptically, not at all happy with her dismissal but he opts not to pursue the matter, he’s fully aware of how stubborn she is. He takes her hand and together they walk back into the dining room where Roland has made an almighty mess. He’s holding his plate in his hands and had just turned to come into the kitchen with it, his effort to help with the clean up. Robin takes the plate as Roland very sweetly thanks Regina for his breakfast. They both laugh and Regina picks the boy up, taking him upstairs to get him ready when Robin says he’ll clean up this mess. 

They spend the day in the park with Roland, this being an unusual day with no crisis in Storybrooke for them to deal with. Henry, who'd slept through breakfast this morning choose to spend the day with Hook. Roland runs them ragged, desperate to explore and always eager to have their attention. 

As darkness falls and they finally convince the boy that they really must leave the park now, they head to Granny’s for some dinner. It hasn’t escaped Robin’s notice that Regina hasn’t eaten a thing all day. He needn’t have worried though, as soon they sit at a booth, her stomach makes an unbelievably loud grumbling noise that has Roland, who’s sitting next to her, laughing. 

“What’ll it be?” Granny comes to take their order. 

“You know, I think I’ll have the steak.” Regina says, pausing before adding, “With fries.” Another pause and she adds, “And a side of macaroni cheese.” Suddenly she's ravenously hungry.

“Well I’m glad to see someone’s got their appetite back.” Robin smiles and Granny looks at him, questioning without words. “Regina wasn’t feeling too well this morning.” He explains.

“I see.” Granny replies, looking Regina up and down in a way that makes her feel more than a little uncomfortable. 

Regina squints, looking back at Granny as though she’d grown another head before looking over at Robin and shrugging. Robin then places his and Roland’s order and they enjoy their meal, Regina eating every bit of her unusually large order. 

They head home, Roland chattering away as they walk but becoming more and more tired until eventually he all but stops and reaches his arms up to Regina to be carried, she obliges of course, picking up the little boy, smiling as he nestles his head on her shoulder, wrapping his arms around her neck and his legs around her waist. He was asleep by the time they got home and Robin gently took him from her. 

“I’ll tuck him into bed and be right back down.” He smiles, carrying his son up to his bedroom and looking forward to a quiet evening with Regina. 

He quickly changes Roland into his pyjamas, the boy so worn out from the days activities that he barely wakes while doing so, once he was all tucked up safely and fast asleep, Robin goes back downstairs and can’t help but laugh at the sight that greets him. Regina is fast asleep, slightly slumped over in her sitting position, she hadn’t even gotten her shoes off. 

“Well, I guess Roland wasn’t the only one tired out by today.” He laughs to himself and sits next to her, planting a light kiss on her forehead and softly whispering her name. She murmurs in response. “Regina, it’s only half passed seven.” He tells her, amusement in his voice.

She mutters something incomprehensible to him, then he makes out a few words, “Tired. Sleep…while.”

He laughes again, “Ok my love, let’s get you a little more comfortable then shall we?” He kneels in front of her, unclasping and unzipping her shoes until he gets them off. He stands and then bends, placing one arm under her legs and one at her back, scooping her up off the seat. She barely stirs at this and that’s when he realises how truly exhausted she must be, normally she’d be threatening to rip something out or off if he were to try such a thing. He laughs to himself at the fact he was now doing for her what he’d just done for his young son. He carefully carries her up the stairs, places her on their bed and undresses her. Then he strips himself down to his boxers and as he does so she turned onto her side, her favoured sleeping position he had noticed. He climbs into bed next to her before spooning into her back, his arm around her protectively as he enjoys the closeness of their skin to skin contact. 

 

The next day, the Charmings decided to hold a street party. Regina was glad Roland was around, the fact that Henry doted on him seemed to be a welcome distraction for her son. They had talked that night about what Emma had done, but after that, perhaps taking a lesson from her she wished he hadn’t, he kept telling her he was fine.

They continued on like that for almost a week, Emma staying remarkably quiet after they confronted her about Excalibur and what she’d done to Henry. Regina was thankful for that small mercy at least, she was loathe to admit it but she was feeling exhausted by the end of every day, and the start of them wasn’t much better.

Robin and Henry had noticed her strange behaviour, and they teamed up to confront her about it in Granny’s over dinner.

“So, how you feeling mom?” Henry asks, aiming for nonchalant but not quite hitting it.

She eyes him across the table suspiciously, then Robin who's sitting next to him, he looks shifty. “Fine…” She replies, eyebrow raised, waiting for whatever was coming.

“It’s just, well, we’re a bit worried about you is all.” Robin says by way of explanation. 

“Every morning you look terrible mom.” Henry continues.

“Gee, thanks.” She acts offended, but is actually more annoyed at herself, she thought she’d been doing a pretty good of covering how bad she’d been feeling.

“And then at night you can barely keep your eyes open passed 8 O’clock.” Robin takes off from Henry’s lead. 

“Why do I get the feeling I’m being ganged up on here?” Regina asks. “You would never do this to me, would you?” She asks Roland, who’s sat next to her, completely oblivious to what’s being said, but snuggles into Regina the moment she speaks to him. 

Granny, who’d been hovering at the next takes this as her opportunity to swoop in. “Can I get anyone a refill?” She asks, it’s a front and the two adults at the table are more than aware of that.

They all politely refuse, their glasses nowhere near empty. 

“So are you still not feeling any better?” Granny asks Regina, her question feels loaded somehow and Regina looks at her sceptically, unsure as to why Granny would be showing any concern toward her. 

“I’m absolutely fine, thanks for asking.” She replies tersely, she can’t escape discomfort at any sign of weakness being shown. 

“Uh-huh.” Granny stands with a knowing smile on her face. “You’re just feeling absolute bone weary exhaustion.” Robin and Henry look at Granny, confused expressions on their faces. “And you’re sick. In the mornings.”

Her insinuation dawns on Regina first, then quickly Robin. Their eyes meet across the table.

“That’s impossible.” Regina says quietly. 

“Well, you know what they say dear, you hear hooves think horses not zebras. That’s all I’m saying.” Granny says with a shrug.

“No, you don’t understand.” Regina clarifies, well, as much as she’s willing to, “It’s not…possible. I can’t…” She trails off, even saying it out loud is too much sometimes. She’s told Robin, she even told him the whole truth, but she’s never talked to Henry about it, she doesn’t know how she could explain it to him. 

“How sure are you about that?” Granny asks, “Sounds to me like you could use a second opinion.” And with that she turns and leaves.

Her and Robin’s eyes lock and, for a second, for a terrible, painful second, she sees a flash of hope in his eyes. She looks away, looks down for a minute, filled with shame, and then turns her attention to Roland and starts chatting nonsense with him, ending any further discussion on the subject.

Henry, who is far more perceptive than a boy his age has any right to be, has by now managed to put enough of the pieces together and he looks at Robin, then across at his mom who has busily distracted herself with Roland. He knows her too well, sees how she tries to cover up the hurt she feels. He hates seeing her like that. 

They head home after dinner, Regina focusing all her attention on Roland so as to curb any further discussion. Her tactic works well until Roland is yawning and ready for bed, Henry makes himself scarce, shouting something about homework as he runs off upstairs to his room. 

Regina takes herself off to bed before Robin has a chance to talk to her, leaving him to deal with Roland’s bed time. Once his boy has been read his story and finally fallen asleep. He goes to their bedroom and finds her lying in bed, on her side, facing away from the door. She’s pretending to be asleep and he knows it. The exhaustion she’s been feeling isn’t enough to override her racing mind, thinking over and over again about what Granny had said. She keeps coming back to the same conclusion, it just isn’t possible, however much she might wish it was sometimes. The memory of the pain she felt after she drank the potion plays over and over in her mind, she had felt it work. 

“Regina, we have to talk about this.” Robin says as he gets into bed. 

“There’s nothing to talk about.” She replies, drawing herself up into a foetal position, all her defences up. 

“Well, I think there is.” He states. “Regina look at me.” He pulls her round, gently, until she’s on her other side, facing him. “I know what you told me, about the potion you drank. But maybe it doesn’t work here, maybe it never worked.”

She shakes her head, looking down, feeling the shame at what she’d done coursing through her again. 

“Well, they say true love can break curses, maybe our love simply managed to end the curse on you?” He offers, his voice full of hope. “Or perhaps something happened in Camelot? There’s a gap in our memories, perhaps Merlin was able to help you?”

“I wish I could believe that.” She tells him, and it’s the truth, but she still won’t look at him.

“Then why can’t you?” He asks, not able to understand, he softly hooks a finger under her chin, forcing her to look at him.

“It’ll hurt too much when you’re wrong.” She admits. “I’m so sorry.” She forces her head down again, tears are rolling freely now, she’s genuinely guilt ridden that, however inadvertently, she’s offered him this hope. 

Robin tenderly cups her face in his hand, “Oh my love, you have nothing to be sorry for.” He kisses her forehead, then takes her hand in his and interlocks their fingers. “Tomorrow we will go together and see a doctor, find out one way or another, for definite.”

“But-” She starts to argue and he cuts her off with a kiss.

“No, my love, even if you are correct, we must find the cause of your condition, it has gone on too long to be ignored.”

She sighs, knowing she won’t win this argument. 

“Now sleep, and tomorrow we will seek our answers.” He tells her, putting his arms around her and pulling her closer to him. 

 

The next morning, Regina can’t help but feel like she’s walking into a set up when she gets up to find Henry and Roland just about to leave. They’re going for some brother bonding time she’s told. Henry’s an insightful boy and he knows when a swift exit is a good idea. Robin tells Regina to go get ready, her appointment is at 10am. She scowls at him but he ignores her and with an exasperated sigh she gives in and goes to get ready. She says a silent prayer of thanks that she’s only nauseous this morning and hasn’t actually vomited.

She protests repeatedly as they drive to the hospital, telling him over and over that this stupid, and a waste of time and as many other excuses as she can come up with. He stops even arguing with her after a while and before she knows it they’re in an examination room, his own stubbornness winning out over hers for once. Regina’s in one of those stupid paper gowns, various samples are taken away for testing before she can put up too much of a fight. Her expression quite adequately displays her displeasure at the situation but Robin is a constant presence at her side, she normally takes comfort in it but today she feels slightly suffocated by it.

Robin has apparently briefed the doctor on the situation, that much becomes obvious quickly when he enters the room a while later to see them. Regina is sitting on the exam table, legs dangling off the edge, Robin sitting on a stool next to her.

“Well Miss Mills, our initial tests indicate you are indeed pregnant.” The doctor announces after he enters the room, absentmindedly flicking through her chart.

Robin grabs her hand, a wide smile on his face. Regina sits, frozen for a moment, trying to process what she’s hearing.

“But…I can’t be.” She replies, voice full of scepticism. 

“Yes, I understand you believed it wasn’t possible. Well, let’s take a look shall we? Confirm things.” The doctor answers, he is happy enough to believe what his tests are telling him, but he can see that those will not be enough to satisfy the mayor.

Robin continues holding Regina’s hand and she lays back on the table, he’s familiar with this process having not long gone through it all with Marion, no Zelena, he corrects himself. 

Regina can’t bring herself to look at him as the doctor sets up the sonogram. She can already feel it emanating off him, it’s hope, again. She can’t allow herself to feel it.

A few minutes pass, they feel like hours to Regina as she waits, filled with dread for the bad news.

“Okay, there we go.” The doctor turns the monitor to them. “There’s not much to see right now, but...” He hits a button and the room is suddenly filled with a noise. It takes them both a second to realise what they’re hearing.

“Is that?” Regina’s head snaps towards the doctor, disbelief in her voice.

“Your baby’s heartbeat.” He confirms with a smile. “It appears you’re about, say, 8 weeks.” 

Regina’s mouth opens to say something, but no words come out, she can’t get her brain to process what’s happening. She just focuses on that sound, that wonderful sound. 

There’s a momentary flash in her mind of all the times she’s heard a heartbeat before, all the times she held a heart in her hands. She doesn’t deserve this. 

Robin’s squeezing her hand, telling her he loves her, he’s beaming at her, delighted at what they’ve been told. 

Everything passes in a haze for a while after that. Regina’s aware of what’s going on around her, hears herself begging Robin not to tell anyone, not yet, on the drive home. It feels like she’s in a dream and she keeps expecting to wake up any minute now. 

When Henry comes home with Roland, he can tell by Robin’s happiness what they were told at the hospital. Regina holds him tightly when he runs up to her and hugs her. 

“I love you Henry.” Is all she manages to say, still unable to process the news.

He looks up at her strangely, unsure of her reaction. A short while later she hears hushed tones from the kitchen. Robin assuring her son that she is happy, but that she’s just shocked, he passes on her request not to tell anyone yet and Henry unhappily agrees. 

She continues on in her dazed state, avoiding everyone but Robin, Henry and Roland unless it’s absolutely necessary. She goes to work, makes sure the town is running smoothly, but any conversations she has with others are kept to a minimum. It’s too much for her to deal with, her mind is in constant overdrive trying to understand what’s happening. 

Over and over she replays the night she took that potion, she remembers the crippling agony she’d felt. It had lasted hours after she’d banished her mother from her chambers. She’d lay on the cold, hard stone floor, feeling as though her insides were being ripped out and mourning what she’d just robbed herself of. That potion had worked. This was not possible.


	3. Chapter 3

When she finds herself at David and Mary Margaret’s apartment a few weeks later, at a crisis talk over Emma’s latest plot to wreak havoc, they’re distant, she can tell they’re angry at her disappearing act when they’re no closer to freeing Emma from the darkness. She can’t explain it, not yet, she can’t say the words. The thought crosses her mind that perhaps this is a trick Emma’s playing on her, to distract her. She shakes it off, she cannot believe that even with the dark one in her Emma Swan could be that cruel. The discussion over how to handle the crisis gets heated, more than a few not so subtle snipes thrown her way about her recent absence. Mary Margaret looks at her strangely when she doesn’t bite back. She doesn’t have it in her, not when she knows they’re right, she’s reverting to type and she’s been selfish.

The best plan they can come up with is to confront Emma once again, and they do so in the woods later that day, the whole gang, the Charmings, Captain Guyliner, even Belle is there. A verbal battle ensues as they confront her over her plans for Gold. 

Emma smirks as she seems to be gaining the upper hand in the argument. She turns her attention to Regina, who has been unusually quiet throughout the verbal sparring, Robin protectively holding her hand. 

Emma approaches Regina, circles around her and Robin, looking her up and down. The whole groups’ attention turns to this. 

“Regina.” Emma’s voice drips in a sickly sweetness they all know is false. “How you feeling?”

Regina glares at her, realising that she knows, somehow, she knows. Robin squeezes her hand, he knows what’s coming too. Regina continues to glare, if anger could burn through Emma, she’d have been a cinder by now. 

“Not feeling very chatty?” Emma teases. “Not to worry, I understand, I suffered terribly the first few months with Henry.” 

Regina hears Mary Margaret gasp in surprise.

Emma tilts her head to right, looking at Regina intently, she reaches out, her hand hovering just above Regina’s abdomen and a knowing, satisfied smirk appears on her face. 

“Hmm.” 

Regina wonders what she sees. She knows enough of the dark one to know that the future is no longer a mystery to Emma. 

“Stay away from our child!” Robin suddenly pulls Regina back and places himself between her and Emma. 

Emma regards him for a moment, “Oh, now, now. I would never harm a child.” She tells him, but that same self-assured, knowing smirk is there.

Emma laughs then, it sounds even harsher in the silence of the forest and they’re all startled by it. Just as suddenly as it starts, it stops. “Bored now.” She says before she vanishes in a cloud of black smoke.

They all stand, stunned for a moment. They’d gotten no closer to locating Gold, they still had only a vague idea of her plans for Excalibur and, perhaps worst of all, Emma had rattled Regina, that much was obvious to them all. 

“Well, that was effective.” Hook quips, essentially saying what they're all thinking. “Glad someone’s got something to celebrate though, congrats.” He says gesturing towards Robin and Regina, more than a hint of his usual sarcasm in his voice.

There’s an uncomfortable silence in group until Mary Margaret breaks it, she approaches Regina and hugs her. “I’m so happy for you both.” She says, even as she feels Regina stiffen at the unfamiliar contact between them. “You deserve to be happy Regina.” Mary Margaret whispers into her ear. Regina seems to deflate at this, returning the hug for a few seconds before pulling back. 

 

Robin watches Regina over the next week, she’s almost back to her old self, no longer hiding in the house or her office away from everyone. She doesn’t mention the pregnancy at all however, not to him or anyone and she’s visibly uncomfortable if anyone mentions it to her. 

As she reaches the 12th week of her pregnancy, Robin relaxes, he’d read much about child bearing since news of Zelena’s pregnancy, and, as he understood, there was far less chance of any complication after this point. He hopes that perhaps Regina can finally accept that this is happening. Any time he’d tried to broach the subject with her she’d find a way to either change the subject or divert his attention until eventually he’d given up. He was sure the issue wasn’t going to go away, at least one of them was he thought to himself.

Robin takes her back to the hospital for her next sonogram, and Regina sits silently in the car on the way. It all feels a bit surreal to him, it’s not that long since he came here with Zelena, that time he felt a strange mixture of joy and revulsion. This is different though, he’s here with the woman he loves. He takes his place on the stool next to the exam table where Regina is laying down. Another difference from before, he’d held back with Zelena, standing against the wall, as far back as he could physically be and still able to see the monitor. He grabs Regina’s hand, smiling as she flinches when the cold jelly hits her exposed abdomen. 

She turns to look at him, gripping his hand like she's trying to draw strength from it. He frowns when he sees her eyes full of fear, he's trying desperately to understand her behaviour but it's difficult when she's refusing to let him in.

“Everything will be fine my love.” He reassurs her, leaning up and kissing her hair line. 

Still she keeps her eyes away from the machine, desperate not to see. She’s been trying so hard not to expect anything but bad news. If she didn’t hope, she couldn’t be disappointed. 

“There we are.” The technician smiles, turning the monitor again so they can both get a better view.

Regina looks at Robin, his eyes are transfixed on the screen, a look of wonder in them. She allows herself to look then, can feel her own eyes widening as she sees the image. She can’t help the smile that appears on her face and she feels her eyes fill with tears.

“That’s…our baby.” She marvels, her eyes fixed on the grainy image. 

Robin laughs, then kisses her. “Yes it is.” He smiles, happy that she’d finally acknowledged their child’s existence. 

“Is it- Is everything normal?” Regina asks the technician, the fear that been gripping her for weeks now slipping straight back in. 

“Everything looks perfect.” The technician replies, smiling reassuringly. “Baby’s a good size, heartbeat’s strong, everything is exactly as it should be. I’ll go get you guys a print out.” She pauses the screen on a perfect outline of the baby and leaves the room. 

“Do you believe it now?” Robin asks, kissing the hand he is holding as they both stare at the picture on the screen.

The tears that had been welling in her eyes start to spill freely now. “It was too much to hope. If it hadn’t…I couldn’t have taken it.” She explains needlessly, he knew, of course he knew.

“I love you.” He tells her, and she really, truly and unreservedly believes him, for the first time in a long time, perhaps ever.


	4. Chapter 4

_Present Day_

Regina insisted on discharging herself from the hospital the next day, despite Robin’s and the doctors and nurses protestations. She could barely hold herself up when she stood and Robin was sure it was only sheer force of will that held her upright, in different circumstances he would be proud. She threatened more than once to use her magic to take herself home and Robin suspected the only reason she didn’t was that she lacked the strength. The very fact she allowed him to wheel her out of the hospital in a wheelchair was indication enough of how weak she was feeling. She was in agony, he could see it with every step, every movement, but she was refusing pain medication. 

Robin was given a long set of instructions, the doctors kept repeating the phrase “major abdominal surgery”, it was all a blur but he was handed written instructions and bottles of pills, some antibiotics he was told she absolutely must take and some painkillers that she should. He listened intently, but this was a long way from the herbs and roots Tuck used in Sherwood. 

She was in her own bed and passed out within minutes of arriving home, the simple act of walking in from the car an almighty struggle. Robin pulled the covers up over her, brushing the hair away from her face. He felt tears welling in his eyes, he leant down and kissed her forehead again.

He drew in a deep shuddering breath and took a step back, leaning on the wall, he slid down it until he was sitting on the floor, back against the wall, knees drawn up towards his chest as the tears started to fall. This was the first time he’d allowed himself to feel, for three days he’d kept vigil at Regina’s bedside after her surgery. They’d tried to explain to him what happened, complete placental abruption they’d said. He was not a stupid man, but he didn’t have the benefit of a lifetime's worth of memories in this land that the others had, he was unused to the science and medicine and the terminology used. They tried to keep it as simple as possible for him, the blood supply to the baby had been cut off, they were sorry, but there was nothing they could do to save his daughter.

Regina had looked so small when he'd entered her room for the first time. Surrounded by tubes and wires, a nurse very patiently explained to him the purpose of each machine. The one helping her to breath, attached to the tube in her mouth, the one helping to replace the fluid she’d lost, the list went on. He had felt slightly more in control when he had some understanding of what was going on. They took the tube out her from her throat after a few hours, and part of him was desperate to for her to wake, so he’d know she was ok, the other part wanted to put off inflicting this pain on her for as long as possible.

The thoughts were overwhelming him as he sat on their bedroom floor silently crying. He wept for his child, his little girl. They had told him while Regina was still unconscious, she didn’t even know, he realised. He wept for Regina, his love, who had finally allowed herself to hope, to look forward and to plan and now it had all been taken away from her. He wasn’t sure if she would come back from this, so he wept for himself, for the possibility that he might have lost her too. 

He wasn’t sure how long had passed, but he realised with a start it was getting dark out. He must have been sitting there for hours. He heard the door to house open and the sounds of movement below, he drew deep breaths, wiping his eyes. He stood up and the ache in his muscles confirmed he’d been in that position for far too long. He quickly went to the bathroom, splashing some cold water on his face before heading downstairs. He found Mary Margaret, Henry and Roland downstairs in the kitchen. 

“Papa!” Roland runs to him immediately and Robin picks him up, enveloping him in a hug. The boy holds him tightly, “Where’s mama?” He asks, he’d started calling Regina that, neither of them were sure when, he'd just slipped it in now and then. 

“Mama’s sleeping.” Robin tells him, putting him back down, he kneels in front of his son, “She’s not feeling very well Roland, she needs peace and quiet to rest and get better ok?” He continues, trying to ensure his son would not seek her out just yet.

“Ok papa.” Roland nods. “Can I watch TV?” He asks, he had adjusted very well to life in this land, he loved cartoons.

“As long as it’s not too loud.” Robin tells him with a smile, the boy nods and he turns and grabs Henry’s hand, dragging him off towards the living room. Robin turns to look at Mary Margaret she had brought groceries and was unpacking them.

“I brought food, in case either of you gets hungry.” She shrugs she’d felt the need to do something, anything to try and be useful. “How is she?” She asks. 

“She’s asleep.” Robin answers. 

Mary Margaret sighed, “How does she…seem?” She asks, almost fearful, she didn’t want to think it, hated herself for the thought even crossing her mind but Regina had not reacted well to loss in the past. 

“It’s hard to tell.” Robin admits, “She’s exhausted. The doctors really didn’t want her to leave the hospital but she just wouldn’t listen. You know what she’s like, she can’t bear to seem weak around others.”

Mary Margaret smiles ruefully, knowing all too well. “And how are you?” she asks. 

He sighs. “Tired.” He runs a hand over his face and through his hair. 

“I can’t even imagine what you’re going through.” Mary Margaret admits. “If there’s anything we can do…” She trails off and she hates that she can’t fix this for them.

“Thank you.” He replies sincerely. He pauses for a second, “I know it’s a lot to ask but could you get someone to take care of cleaning her office.” Mary Margaret looks confused, “There was a lot of blood.” He explains. “So much blood.” He says quietly, momentarily lost in the memory of how she’d looked when he’d found her. He’d truly thought she was dead. He’d fought many battles before and had never been squeamish about the sight of blood, but seeing the woman he loved lying on that marble floor in her office in a pool of her own blood, he’d thought his own heart was going to stop. 

“Oh.” Mary Margaret is a little taken-a-back by the thought. “Of course, I’ll make sure it’s seen to.” She reassures him, putting her hand over his and giving a comforting squeeze.

 

Regina was laying on her side in bed, facing away from the door. She wanted nothing more than the oblivion of sleep. To be unconscious and not have to suffer this cavernous ache of emptiness. She’d woken to find herself alone in the dark room, she could hear voices from downstairs as well as the TV. The thought of dealing with people was too much. She was quietly sobbing, again, she couldn’t stop herself and she was beginning to despise herself for it. 

“Mama.” There was a gentle tap on Regina’s shoulder, and she became are that there was someone else on the bed with her, a very small someone else.

Regina took a deep shuddering breath, trying desperately to pull herself together. Before she could bring herself to turn around, the boy was off the bed and moving round to stand at the side she was facing. He pulled himself up onto the bed again, facing her this time, and reached out again.

“Mama don’t be sad.” Roland reaches out, stroking her face, mimicking the actions he’d seen from adults, uncoordinated but in the completely innocent way only a child can.

Regina took his hand, sniffing a trying desperately to regain some composure for the boys’ sake. 

“Papa said you weren’t well.” Roland continues, she could tell by the way he said he was pondering something.

“That’s right sweetheart.” She manages to answer, giving his hand a little reassuring squeeze.

“Does that mean you’re going to go away like my first mommy?” He asks. 

It was enough to snap Regina out of grief stricken haze for a minute. “Oh no baby, I’m not going to leave.” She runs a hand through his mop of curls, then pulls him closer to kiss his forehead. “I’m just…a little sad right now is all, I’ll be okay.” The words were out before she could stop herself, she was lying to him now, she couldn’t see a time when she would ever be okay with this.

“Mama?” He was asking permission to ask her something. 

“Yeah?” She gives it.

“They told me not to say anything, but I don’t understand. Mary Margaret said I won’t get to be a big brother now and then Henry said it was because you lost the baby. If the baby’s lost why don’t we just go find it? Papa’s real good at finding things.” 

Regina managed a rueful smile at his innocence, how literally children understood things. “I wish we could little one.” The tears were falling again, she was being overcome with exhaustion, and her mind was fogging as she thought how she possibly convey this to one so young. “Do you remember what your papa told you when your mommy went away?” She asks.

The boy nods.

“That she died?” She asks, confirming what Robin had said, exactly what he’d told Roland wasn’t something they’d talked about in depth. Roland nods again. “Well…” She pauses, forcing herself to say the words, “The baby that was in my tummy, it…died too.” Her voice cracks, hot tears streaming down her face, saying it out loud was killing her, but she fought to hold it together for Roland’s sake, she would do her best to never do anything to hurt this boy, even when she was suffering.

Roland sits quietly for a moment, pondering what he’s been told. “Papa said mommy had gone to a better place, where she would be happy and safe and with her family that died already.” He pauses for a minute, grabbing Regina’s hand back. “My mommy will look after my little sister.” He says earnestly with a self-assured nod. He’d been convinced from the moment they’d told him about the baby that it would be a girl and refused to refer to the baby as anything other than his sister. He lifts up the covers then and snuggles into Regina, resting his back against her chest and lifting her arm so it was over his chest, he then clings on to her arm. “You cuddle me when I’m not well and it always makes me feel better.” He declares, “I’ll stay with you mama ‘til you feel better.” 

Regina kisses the back of his head, “I love you baby.” She tells him, she knew he meant well but his words cut through her like a knife. Her feelings about Marion are too churned up with her anger towards Zelena. Then there was the fact that she’d killed Marion, or she was supposed to have. This sweet little boy’s mother was to have died at her hand, on her orders anyway, and she couldn’t even remember it and yet, here she was, being comforted by that woman’s son. She deserved the pain she was suffering. When Roland was old enough, he would find out about what she had done and he would hate her too. She was so stupid to ever believe she could have happiness. Her body was wracked with silent sobs as the exhaustion took hold of her and she succumbed to sleep, Roland lying quietly in her arms, dropping off to sleep soon after her.

 

Robin found them that way half an hour later. He’d been talking with Mary Margaret in the kitchen and then they’d gone into the living room to find Henry, who had barely slept in the last few days, worried sick about his mom, had fallen asleep on the couch and Roland was nowhere to be seen. Robin knew straight away where he’d gone, he hadn’t expected to find this though. His boy was happily pulled tight against Regina’s chest, his hands clamped onto her arm where it held him. They were both fast asleep. Robin smiled at the sight, glad to see that Regina was at least letting one member of the Locksley family comfort her.


	5. Chapter 5

A week and half later, little has changed. Regina doesn’t cry now, but she’s barely been out of bed, hardly eaten or drank. Roland has spent as much time as he possibly can with her, mostly just hugging her. She’ll only eat when Henry when literally stands over her, begging her to do so. Her two boys are trying their hardest to get her through this. She won’t look Robin in the eye, flinches every time he tries to touch her. He’s trying to be patient, he really is, but they’re going to need to talk at some point. Doctors have visited the house, they assure him her physical recuperation is going well, far better than they could have hoped for, the suspicion being that her magic has something to do with it. Archie has stopped by too, but his efforts to get Regina to talk have so far been in vein.

It’s mid-morning when David, Mary Margaret, Hook and Belle appear on the front porch. Robin answers the door, inviting them in, platitudes are exchanged before Killian finally cuts through it all as they enter the kitchen.

“Look, mate, I know you’ve been through it here.” He starts and the others start to internally cringe, knowing he is definitely the worst possible choice of their group to say this. 

“But the fact is, Emma’s only like this because she wanted to save your missus and like it or not, we need her. Right now. The town’s about to be attacked by some…thing…and only someone with powerful magic has a hope in hell of stopping it. So, like it or not, and I don’t, we need her.”

Robin tries to stay calm, he knows Killian doesn’t truly have such a cavalier attitude to their loss, he had made that clear a few nights ago when the two had shared a drink in Granny’s, but his tone is not helpful, “She can barely stand.” Robin informs them, “Much less fight.” 

“We know she’s still recovering.” Mary Margaret, ever the diplomat steps in, “But I’m afraid Killian’s right, right now, she’s our only shot at saving the town.”

The conversation develops into something of an argument, the three against Robin, who’s dead set against even mentioning anything to Regina. Their voices are raised as accusations are thrown back and forth. 

 

Upstairs, Regina is in bed, she hears the door and she can hear the muffled voices and then more and more of the conversation as the voices grow louder and angrier. She hears enough of the conversation to understand the situation. She takes a deep breath, “Enough of this.” She mutters, making the decision. She whips back the covers, sitting up in bed, ignoring the pain that sears across abdomen. She wouldn’t normally use her magic for something so trivial as dressing but she doesn’t have the time or the energy to deal with getting ready. She stands up and waves a hand over herself, purple smoke surrounds her and when it dissipates she’s fully dressed, hair and make-up done. She passes by the mirror on her way out, catches a glimpse of herself, even with her make-up on she looks pale and drawn. She waves her hand again and puts a glamour on herself to give the appearance of good health.

 

Everyone falls silent when Regina suddenly enters the room, dressed in a black pant suit, white shirt, her usual killer heels and her hair and make-up impeccable. “What’s this big threat coming to town then?” She asks.

They all turn to face her, stunned by her sudden appearance. 

“Well? Don’t just stand there gawping, I need to know what I’m up against.” She tells them, sounding very much like her old self.

“We’re not sure.” David’s the first one to recover. “It was a definite threat, but very vague about the actual dangerous creature. Maybe ogres? Possibly a dragon…” 

She draws David a look that would make a lesser man flinch, fortunately he’s grown quite accustomed to Regina looking at him like he’s a moron. “I see.” 

“Look love, it could be another fleet of flying bloody monkeys for all we know, the point is, there’s something coming and much as it pains me to say it, Charming’s sword or Snow’s harsh wards are not going to cut it, you’re our best shot at stopping whatever it is.” Hook, once again, was abrupt and to the point.

“I’m here aren’t I? I’m merely asking because it’s easier to prepare if I know what I’m up against.” She returns his hostility. 

There’s a silence in the room as everyone looks around at each other. Mary Margaret and Robin look at each other, communicating without words, both are at the same time reassured and disturbed by Regina’s sudden change in behaviour. 

“Let’s go then.” Regina orders, and there’s no mistaking it is an order. “The whole town’s in danger right? Let’s gather as many people as possible together, at Granny’s and the Town Hall and I’ll put a protection spell over the buildings.”

There’s a momentary pause as they all look at each other again, before David is the one to break it. “Well, that’s better than anything we’ve come up with.”

She draws him another look before stalking out the door towards the living room where Henry and Roland are sat waiting, they too had heard the exchange between the adults. 

They both jump up when the see Regina, it’s the first she’s made it downstairs.

“Mom!” Henry exclaims.

“Mama!” Roland excitedly runs towards her, his arms out. 

Robin swiftly intervenes, “Whoa there little man!” He says scooping up his son. “Remember what we talked about? Mama’s still sore, you have to be gentle with her.” He reminds him.

“I’m fine.” Regina lies, ignoring the pain she feels as she takes Roland from Robin. She rests him on her hip and he holds her tightly. She gives him a reassuring squeeze and then hugs Henry with her free hand, kissing his forehead. 

“I’ve missed you Mom.” Henry tells her, hugging her.

She kisses him again, “We have to go.” 

The group leaves, Robin heads off to gather his men, David and Killian go to arrange the town hall, leaving Regina and Mary Margaret to head towards Granny’s, where it’s been decided the boys will be safest. 

Regina is still carrying Roland, she shifts him to her other hip as they’re walking, literally using him as a shield between herself and Mary Margaret. Henry is at her other side, his arm interlocked with hers, he’s touching her the entire way as they walk, taking comfort from the physical contact as if he’s reassuring himself that she’s really there. They gather as many people as they can on the way. 

They reach Granny’s and a short while later another large group of people arrive, gathered by some of Robin’s men. Roland and Henry reluctantly release their grip on Regina and they’re placed into Granny’s care along with Neal, who’s already there. Regina’s not fond of the old bag but she’s handy with a crossbow and Regina knows without a doubt Granny would lay down her life for her boys and Neal. She kisses them both, tells them she’ll see them soon. 

Regina and Mary Margaret leave Granny’s together, Regina turns once they reach the pavement, lifting her hands to cast the protection spell. Mary Margaret watches Regina closely, there’s a look of intense concentration on her face, and once it’s done, she visibly sags. Mary Margaret is worried now, she knows enough about magic to know that this is a relatively easy spell for Regina and if something so simple is draining her, how can she possibly manage a battle?

They head to town hall next, Robin, David and Killian are there waiting, along with the merry men. 

“Everyone’s inside.” David tells them. 

Regina nods, taking that as her cue to cast her spell. She focuses all her attention on the town hall, she raises her hands, the same intense concentration required, she casts the spell and as soon as it’s done she stumbles backwards. She would have fallen had Robin not been there to catch her.

“Regina you’re not ready for this.” Robin says as he helps her stand upright.

“I’m fine.” Regina snaps back.

“You’ll be no use to us if you pass out mid-fight love.” Killian concedes. 

“I’m fine.” She says with gritted teeth. “You insisted that I come, here I am.”

“Regina, we’re just worried about you.” Mary Margaret tries to explain.

“Well, apparently, it’s not me you need to worry about.” Regina replies, looking off into the distance. 

They all turn to look at what’s got her attention.

“This is not good.” Hook is, as usual, the first to speak. 

“You don’t say.” Regina retorts, bracing herself. 

Robin and his men ready their bows along with Mary Margaret. 

“What manner of beast is this?” Robin asks, unfamiliar with the creatures rapidly approaching. 

“They’re griffin.” It’s Hook who answers. “They’re a lot of bloody griffin.”

“Can they be killed?” Robin asks, the beasts are approaching where the group stands, too many to count exactly but at least two dozen. 

“That they can aye, but not easily.” Killian replies.

“That’s all I needed to know.” Regina says, readying a fireball as the first beast swoops in to attack. 

Regina throws the fireball, hitting the griffin she was aiming at but it keeps coming anyway, the only effect of the fireball to slow it slightly. She’s forced to dive out of the way, the movement sending searing pain through her body from her abdomen. She ignores it, standing up again. She’s angry now and she can use that. She channels the anger into her magic and it helps, the next fireball she throws disintegrates one of the beasts. Around her she can hear arrows flying and David and Hook doing battle. 

“They’re splitting up!” David shouts, and she rolls her eyes at his constant need to state the obvious.

They watch as a group of the beasts head towards Main Street, towards Granny’s. A few were trying to get into the town hall but the protection spell was holding. 

Robin, Mary Margaret and the merry men’s bows are hitting their targets but seem to be having minimal effect. One beast finally falls but she can’t even count how many arrows it’s taken to bring it down. David’s managed to take out one so far with Killian’s assistance. 

‘They were right.’ Regina thinks, ‘This is all on me.’ She feels an overwhelming need to protect this town, to get something right. These things will not harm any of her people she vows to herself. Adrenaline and anger fuels Regina’s magic making it grow stronger and more intense and she manages to take out the majority of the beasts still fighting them while the others take out a few between them. She then turns her attention to the one creature that is stubbornly still trying to get into the town hall. She deals with it swiftly. Finding it easier the more of them she deals with. 

They take off in a sprint toward Granny’s, Regina now so riled up she’s not even feeling pain anymore. Another battle ensues outside Granny’s, the beasts here are fiercer, apparently frustrated at being unable to get at the people inside. These beasts move slightly faster and it takes more hits with both fireballs and arrows to bring them down. Everyone has to dive out of the way more than once, and they lose any track of who owes who as people are frequently pushing each other out of the way of swooping attacks. It seems never ending, but eventually, the last beast is defeated and turns to ashes as Regina hits it with another fireball. 

They hear a loud cheer from inside Granny’s where everyone inside has been watching with baited breath. The group all smiles at each other, the men shaking hands and clapping each other the back. It’s Mary Margaret who sees it first, then David and Killian who draw the others attention to it. 

Emma stands outside Gold’s shop, holding something in her hand, they’re too far to see what. 

“It was all just a bloody distraction.” Killian says angrily, more annoyed at himself for not anticipating such a thing. 

“She could have killed people.” Mary Margaret says, still unable to fathom such behaviour from her daughter. “If Regina hadn’t been here…”

Emma looks down the street to them, smirks and then disappears in a cloud of black smoke. 

“I don’t understand, she could just take whatever she wants from there regardless of where our attention is focused…” Robin says.

“She obviously really doesn’t want us to know what she needed.” David answers, thinking it through, if there wasn’t a crisis in the town, Belle would be in the shop, not hiding out in Granny’s with everyone else. Even if Emma had knocked out or hurt Belle, they would know she’d been there and to look to find out what the missing item was. Emma had planned to get in and out without them knowing. “She didn’t want us to know anything was missing.” David explains.

“Well, looks like she went to a lot of trouble for nothing then.” Kilian replies.

“Why would she come out into the street and expose herself then? Why not just use her magic inside to disappear?” Robin asks.

“I made sure she couldn’t, she can’t appear in there, or disappear for that matter.” Regina answers, as she speaks the group looks at her and they literally see the colour drain from her face as she loses the strength to maintain the glamour spell. As the adrenaline leaves her body, her hands start to shake and suddenly her legs won’t hold her anymore, blackness clouds her vision and the last thing she remembers is feeling angry at her body’s betrayal.

David, being closest, catches her and gently lowers her to the ground. Robin’s by her side immediately and Henry runs out from Granny’s. 

“Mom!” Henry shouts, running towards her, Roland tries to follow but Granny holds him back, lifting him up and stopping him from seeing. 

“Regina!” Robin kneels on the ground next to her, grabbing her hand. “I should never have let her do this.” He's annoyed with himself for allowing this to happen. 

Mary Margaret is on the ground next to them now, feeling for Regina’s pulse. Henry has Regina’s other hand. 

“We should get her to the hospital.” Mary Margaret says.


	6. Chapter 6

Regina begins to stir, pulling her hands away from Robin and Henry, she tries to sit up. 

“Regina, stay still!” Mary Margaret tells her, trying to ease her back into a lying a position.

Regina fights past Mary Margaret’s hands, sitting up and looking around, it’s obvious she can’t quite remember what's happened.

“Regina, you collapsed, we need to get you to the hospital.” Mary Margaret tells her. 

Regina looks around at everyone standing around her, then she sees the crowd in Granny’s looking out at her and suddenly she’s standing before anyone has a chance to stop her. She stumbles slightly and Robin has to put his arms around her waist to steady her.

After a second she tries to shake him off, “I’m fine.” Robin stands at her side, his arm around her back, holding her waist at the opposite side.

Killian scoffs, “You really must have a different definition of that word than the rest of us.” 

Regina scowls at him and even Mary Margaret shoots him a disapproving look. 

“Mom please, you don’t look well.” Henry pleads. 

“I just want to go home.” Regina makes her own plea to Robin. She’s desperate to get away from all the eyes looking at her. Robin’s expression softens but she can tell as he takes a breath to speak he’s about to argue with her so she cuts in before he can speak. “Please.” She leans in even closer to him, so only he can hear her, “I don’t want to go back there.” She admits in a whisper.

It’s enough to break Robin’s resolve. “Let’s get you home.” He agrees, albeit reluctantly. 

Regina sags against him, relieved to have his agreement, she waves her hand and in an instant the two of them are in their bedroom. She almost falls again, the effort of transporting them both taking its toll. Robin supports her as she moves towards the bed, all but collapsing onto it. Though she tries to hide it, he can see the pain every move is causing her now the adrenaline has worn off. 

“Regina please, you need to see a doctor.” Robin says as he pulls the quilt over her. “And don’t say you’re fine.” He stops her before she can start. 

“I just need to sleep.” Regina answers, grabbing his hand. 

Robin sits down on the bed. “You need to let me take care of you.” He tells her, holding her hand in both of his. “I can only imagine what’s going on in that head of yours my love, but I need for you to know that I’m not going anywhere.” 

As if on cue, they hear the noise of people entering the house and calling their names.

Robin sighs, he’d been hoping he might have been about to get through to Regina. “Up here.” He calls out in response to the ever more frantic shouts of his and Regina’s name. 

Regina sits up in bed. 

“Are you ok?” Mary Margaret asks as she and David enter the room tentatively. 

“Yes, Regina just needs some rest.” Robin answers, underplaying matters somewhat. 

“Uh, Robin, can I talk to you for a second?” Mary Margaret indicates for Robin to join her outside the room. 

“If you’re going to talk about me at least do me the courtesy of doing so in front of me.” Regina snipes. 

Robin had to admit, he found it reassuring she at least had the energy to snark at people. 

“Actually, this isn’t about you.” Mary Margaret replies, trying her best to keep her tone upbeat. 

Robin’s frowns, he had expected Mary Margaret had want to discuss Regina’s condition. “If it’s not about Regina then…” He trails off.

“I really think we should go outside.” Mary Margaret says in a forcefully cheery tone.

“Oh for god’s sake, spit it out whatever it is!” Regina snaps.

Mary Margaret takes a few seconds, trying to think how best to phrase what she needs to say. “Robin, it's uh…you’re needed…at the hospital.” She says, pausing as she tries her best to convey a message to him without Regina knowing.

“I don’t understand.” Robin, unfortunately, doesn’t pick up on what Mary Margaret’s trying to say. “Is it Roland, did something happen?” He asks, jumping up from the bed and moving towards Mary Margaret. 

“No.” It’s Regina who answers him. “It’s Zelena.” 

Mary Margaret sighs, this was exactly what she’d hoped to avoid.

Robin looks at Mary Margaret questioningly, seeking confirmation. 

“She’s gone into labor.” Mary Margaret confirms what Regina has already figured out.

Robin looks at Regina, he takes a step back towards the bed.

“Go.” Regina says.

Robin ignores her, sitting on the bed again and taking her hands in his. “I’m not going anywhere, I told you.”

Regina pulls her hands back. “You should go.” She says, looking off out of the window. 

“Regina don’t do this.” Robin pleads with her. “Please.”

“I’m not doing anything. You and I both know you want to be there when your child is born, so you should go.” She’s using her queen voice. 

“Regina, you know I won’t lie, of course I would like to be there, but I need to be here, I need to be with you, you’re more important and you need me.” Robin tries to take her hand again and she visibly stiffens at his touch.

“I don’t need you.” Regina’s defences are up in full force, she waves her hand and in a flash of purple smoke sends Robin to the hospital.

“Regina!” Mary Margaret exclaims.

She’s about to start admonishing her, Regina can feel it. With a roll of her eyes, she waves her hand again and suddenly David and Mary Margaret find themselves back in Granny’s. 

Henry jumps up, they’d forced him to stay behind when they’d left for Regina’s, telling him he needed to stay and watch over Roland. “What happened?” He asks eagerly.

“Well, we’re here and your mom’s alone.” David answers honestly.

“I have to go.” Henry says, about to take off in the direction of home before David’s hand on his shoulder stops him.

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea buddy.” David says.

“But my mom shouldn’t be alone right now.” Henry argues.

“I think maybe your grandpa’s right.” Mary Margaret says. “Regina made it pretty clear she wants to be alone right now.” She puts a hand on Henry’s other shoulder in an effort to comfort him. “I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a protection spell on the house.” She mutters as an afterthought. 

 

Regina sits on the bed for a moment after sending everyone away, her mind was racing. At least she didn’t have to wonder what she’d done to deserve this she thought wryly, she knew exactly, and she did deserve this. Robin didn’t though, she was hurting other people, people she cared about, people she loved. She couldn’t do this, she couldn’t look at Robin’s child with Zelena and not see her own loss. Regina adjusted her position in bed and this time she couldn’t help but cry out in pain as a hot searing pain coursed through her abdomen. This was too much. She just needed to sleep she told herself. Regina reached out to the nightstand where the painkillers she’d been given at the hospital were in the drawer. She just needed to sleep she told herself again, she just needed this noise in her head to stop. She took a handful of the painkillers, swallowing them dry. When they had no effect after a few minutes she took another handful, and then another until finally she fell into fitful sleep. 

 

Mary Margaret and Tinkerbell walk up the front path of Regina’s house together. News of the day’s events had reached the fairies and Tinkerbell had stopped by Mary Margaret and David’s apartment to ask how Regina was doing, she couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt at how things had turned out and she was quite sure Regina would find a way to blame her. Henry had been constant in his nagging to go and check on his mother for the last few hours and Mary Margaret had finally relented. She had insisted that Henry wait in the apartment while she went to check on Regina. It’s not that she was expecting to find Regina in full evil queen mode, but history had made her cautious when it came to Regina and how well she would deal with her emotions. While Mary Margaret absolutely knew that Regina would never hurt Henry, she also knew that Regina had a habit of striking out when she was hurting. Mary Margaret felt it was better she assess the situation before letting Henry come home, Tinkerbell had volunteered to come along, the fairy had her own concerns about what they might find.

As they reach the door Mary Margaret cautiously touches the door handle, half expecting her hand to be flung back by a protection spell, a look of mild surprise passes between Mary Margaret and Tinkerbell as the door opens with no issues. As they enter the front door to Regina’s house, they find the house in darkness. Tinkerbell gets an uneasy feeling.

“Something’s not right.” Tinkerbell says, she can’t explain it, but she can just feel it.

Mary Margaret feels it too, she may not have the magical abilities that some in her family do, but her instincts are finely tuned and everything is telling her there’s something wrong in this house.

“Last place I saw her was her bedroom, might as well start there.” Mary Margaret reasons, heading for the stairs. She reaches Regina’s bedroom door, lightly knocking, “Regina?” She calls out. 

There’s no answer. Mary Margaret quietly opens the door, calling out Regina’s name again. It takes her eyes a moment to adjust to the room, the bathroom light has been left on, so there’s some light spilling into the room. She can feel Tinkerbell at her back, the two of them see it at the same time. The awkward angle Regina’s lying at, the bottle of pills in her hand, some of them spilled onto the bed. 

“Regina!” Mary Margaret races towards her, she kneels on the bed, pulling Regina back up into a sitting position, feeling at her neck for a pulse. “She’s breathing!” Mary Margaret tells Tinkerbell. “We need to get her the hospital now!” Mary Margaret is frantic now. “Come on Regina, stay with me.” She tells her, pushing the hair back out of her face, she picks up the pill bottle.

Tinkerbell takes out her wand, waving it over Mary Margaret and Regina and suddenly the three of them are in the hospital. 

“We need help!” Tinkerbell shouts. 

There’s a flurry of activity as suddenly doctors and nurses swoop in, Regina is on a trolley and being taken off to a room within seconds. 

A doctor turns to Mary Margaret and Tinkerbell as Regina is taken away. “What happened?” She asks.

“I don’t know exactly...” Mary Margaret answers. “She took some of these.” She says, offering the doctor the pill bottle.

“Do we know how many? When?” The doctor asks.

Mary Margaret and Tinkerbell look at each other, then the doctor. “We don’t know.” Mary Margaret admits.

The doctor turns and runs towards the room where Regina’s been taken. Mary Margaret slowly walks towards the nearby waiting area, slumping into the seat and leaning forward, dropping her head into her hands. 

Tinkerbell stands in front of her, shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot. “I should have seen this coming.” She says, shaking her head.

“How could you have?” Mary Margaret replies, she says it with the intention of making Tinkerbell feel better but it has the opposite effect.

Tinkerbell looks at Mary Margaret for a moment. “What exactly did Regina tell you about how we met?” She asks.

Mary Margaret looks up, she can see how uncomfortable the subject is making Tink. 

“Snow!?” Robin runs towards them before Tinkerbell has a chance to explain. “What happened? They told me you brought Regina here.”

“They just took her in, we don’t know how she is yet.” Mary Margaret stands to greet him. 

“I don’t understand, what happened?” Robin asks again. 

“We’re not exactly sure.” Mary Margaret admits. “We found her…she had taken some painkillers.” She doesn’t know how to say it. 

Robin still doesn’t understand. 

“Robin, what did Regina tell you about how she and I first met?” Tinkerbell tries to broach the subject. 

“I don’t understand what that has to do with this…” Robin frowns, Tinkerbell gives him an exasperated look, prompting him to answer. “She said that you came to her and used your pixie dust to find her soul mate and that it led her to me.” He gives the briefest possible answer. 

Tinkerbell hesitates now, she had hoped Regina had perhaps told Robin the whole story, she knows Regina will not be best pleased if she reveals it now but what choice does she have? “That’s true.” Tinkerbell tells them. “But that’s not exactly the whole story.”

“Tinkerbell I don’t understand what this has to do with what’s happening now?” Robin is getting frustrated now. 

“The first time I saw Regina.” Tink pauses. “She was falling from her balcony at the palace.”

Mary Margaret and Robin look at each other, unsure what she means. 

“If you ask her, she’ll swear ‘til she’s blue in the face that she fell from that balcony, but I was there, it wasn’t an accident.” Tinkerbell explains.

“She tried to kill herself?” Mary Margaret is incredulous.

“Are you saying that’s what happened today?” Robin asks, eyes wide as the implication of what he’s being told hits him. 

“We don’t know anything for sure.” Mary Margaret tries to soften the blow for him. “But, it looks like she did take a lot of tablets.”

It’s Robin who sinks to the chair now. His mind is racing, just moments ago he’d been holding his newborn son, and while that had its own confusing mix of emotions due to the circumstances of his conception, this was something he was completely unprepared for. “I should never have left her.”

“Robin this isn’t your fault. We don’t even know for sure what’s happened.” Mary Margaret sits next to him, a comforting hand on his shoulder. 

“Isn’t it? If I hadn’t gone to New York in the first place...” He says, self-recrimination evident in his voice. He suddenly stands up. “I need to see her.”

“They’ll come get us when we can see her.” Mary Margaret tells him what he already knows.

“I need to do something.” Robin is pacing now. 

“All we can do is wait.”


	7. Chapter 7

“They must be desperate if they’re sending you in. Go away insect.” Regina is sitting up in bed, looking out of the window of her hospital room when Archie opens the door to her room and steps inside.

“Nice to see you too Regina.” He smiles in response to her icy greeting. 

She rolls her eyes at his cheeriness. “What do you want?” She asks.

“I’m just here to listen.” Archie replies, sitting down in the chair next to Regina’s bed. It’s been empty since Mary Margaret and Tinkerbell brought her to the hospital last night, Regina refusing to see any visitors since she woke up. 

“Well, good luck, I don’t have anything to say.” Regina tells him, her eyes still haven’t left the window.

“Ok.” Archie takes off his jacket, makes himself comfortable. “You could start by telling me why you took those pills.” 

Regina looks at him then, making her disdain obvious with her look. “I took painkillers because I was in pain.” 

“I see. I understand you’d been refusing to take them at all up until that point.” Archie counters.

“I don’t know if it somehow escaped your attention but there was a battle in the middle of town yesterday.” Regina spits the words at him, tone icy, it’s her evil queen voice again.

“No, it didn’t escape my notice.” Archie answers with a smile. “You saved the whole town. Again.”

She doesn’t say anything, looking out the window again, staring off into the distance. 

“So what changed yesterday that you took the painkillers?” Archie persists. 

She doesn’t answer for a minute or two, and Archie thinks she’s going to ignore him, but eventually she says. “I was sore.” 

Archie sits quietly, taking in Regina’s appearance while she’s focusing on looking outside. There are dark circles under her eyes, she looks pale and she’s lost some weight, too much weight. She’s only ever told him a fraction of what she’s been through in her life, he knows that, but a part of him wonders if this latest blow might just be the straw that broke the camel’s back. He shakes that thought away, that’s not the case, he’s sure of it, the fact that she’s still fighting him is evidence of that. 

“I was tired.” Regina continues very quietly. “I just wanted it to stop.” She looks down at her hands now before she continues, louder, voice more confident. “I know what you all think.” She says. “I wasn’t trying to kill myself.” She looks Archie in the eye as she says this, almost a challenge.

“No?” Archie asks. “I hear this isn’t the first time.” He says, and his statement is definitely a challenge.

Regina frowns, then realization hits her. “That little green pain in the ass! That was an accident.”

“Is that what this was too? An accident?” Archie asks.

She scowls at him. “I’ve already told you what this was, I took some painkillers because I was in pain.”

Archie sighs, “Ok, for now let’s say that’s true.” Regina scoffs indignantly at this. “Let’s talk about the baby.” Archie continues, he sees her posture stiffen immediately. 

There’s a long silence as Regina takes some deep breaths, looking out of the window, now glaring at whatever far off point she was staring at. Archie thinks they’re going to stay like that for a while, but suddenly, Regina whips the covers back and is gathering her clothes from the locker beside her bed. 

“Regina?” He questions, rounding the bed to the side she’s standing at, she’s already a little unsteady on her feet. “Where are you going?” He asks, putting a hand on her forearm. 

“I’m getting out of here.” She snaps, pulling her arm away from him.

“Regina, we need to talk about what’s happened.” Archie gently pushes as she begins walking towards the door, clothes bundled in her arms, she just wants out of there, hospital gown or not.

She turns quickly, too quickly if the way she almost loses her balance is anything to go on, to face him. “There’s nothing to talk about.” She tells him icily, quietly and in a way it’s more frightening than if she were to stand and scream at him.

Regina then turns back, pulls open the door of her room and finds herself walking straight into Robins’ chest. She tries to push him out of her way but he’s solid and unmoving. Archie behind Regina and Mary Margaret and Henry in the waiting room behind Robin all look on, realization dawning on them just how weakened a state Regina must truly be in if she hasn’t used her magic to get away. 

Regina’s still trying to push against Robin, almost frantic now, her clothes dropped to the floor around her feet, she’s pounding at his chest now. Robin takes her wrists in his hands, stilling her movement. 

“If you won’t talk to him, you will talk to me.” He says, almost a growl and he begins walking forward into the room, taking her with him. Emotions are threatening to overtake him, he’s scared and he’s tired and yes, he’s angry with her. He walks her backwards until the side of the bed hits the back of her legs and she sits. Archie quietly slips out, closing the door behind him. 

Regina sits, staring at her hands in her lap as Robin paces the room like a caged animal. 

She looks up at him. “I don’t mean to do that.” She says her voice is small and frightened, and it’s no small thing for her to be so vulnerable, they both know it. 

Robin stops pacing and stands in front of her. He takes a deep breath before he speaks, trying to steady his voice, to mask the emotional turmoil he’s feeling. He doesn’t believe her. “I understand that this is you trying to protect yourself but the problem with that is, you’ve already been hurt by what’s happened.” His hand is cupping her face now, his thumb tracing her cheekbones the way he loves to do. “So have I.” He feels his own eyes fill with tears as she looks away. “She was my daughter too.”

Regina’s eyes lock with his in an instant. “She?” It was barely more than a whisper.

Robin hadn’t meant for this, not right now when she was so exhausted but there was no going back now, he pulled Regina up into his arms, holding her tightly against him, her head resting against his chest, he kissed the top of her head. “We had a daughter.” He says, gently rocking back and forth and tears are flowing freely now from him, Regina closes her eyes and grabs a fistful of his shirt, holding him as close as possible to her. She has no more tears left to cry. She’s not even sure she feels sad anymore, she just feels empty, like she’s a void. She thinks about it as Robin continues to murmur reassurances that everything will be ok. It’s a perfect analogy really, she’s like one of those black holes she'd read about in one of Henry’s books. A vortex of blackness killing anyone who gets close, snuffing any light that gets near. Of course this was going to happen. It’s her own fault for letting herself hope. She doesn’t deserve a happy ending, not after all she’s done in her life. She lets go of Robin, she has to protect him. Robin takes a step back, his eyes red-rimmed but no crying. He can see the change in her demeanour that’s occurred. 

Regina stands up straight, stiffens, her face back to its neutral mask. “You should go.” She tells him, and she intends it to be a dismissal.

“What?” Robin doesn’t understand, he knows something has changed, but he hasn’t figured out what yet.

“Leave.” She replies, her tone cold.

Robin sighs, running a hand over his face. “Regina, don’t do this. Not now, not after everything.” He knows what she’s doing now, but he’s not sure he’s got the energy to fight her.

“I said, get out.” She’s almost sneering now. Why can’t he see she’s brought nothing but misery to him, she wonders, she’s trying to help him

Robin stares at her for a beat, his exasperation obvious. “Regina, I love you, but I can’t do this, not today. I’m going to get some sleep and we will deal this tomorrow.” He’s deliberately very clear. He’s not giving up, he’s postponing. He just does not have it in him to fight her right now. 

She doesn’t respond. He kisses her forehead and leaves the room, his frustration clear to Mary Margaret and Henry who are still in the waiting room. 

“Robin?” Henry asks, looking passed him toward his mother who is now sitting on the side of the bed. 

“Your mother is a stubborn woman.” Robin replies. 

Mary Margaret sighs, smiling ruefully, Robin’s statement is hardly news to her. 

“Can I talk to her?” Henry asks hopefully.

Mary Margaret and Robin share a look. 

“Henry, I think maybe you should head home with Robin. I’m going to talk to Regina.” Mary Margaret replies. 

Henry opens his mouth to argue, but changes his mind as another look passes between the two adults. “Fine.” He replies dejectedly. None of them have explicitly shared their concerns about what happened, but Henry has been told enough that he has his own suspicions. Robin puts his arm around the boys’ shoulders and they head towards home together. 

Mary Margaret takes a moment to steel herself for the conversation she’s about to have. She walks into Regina’s room, throwing the door shut behind her, Regina jumps as the door slams shut. Mary Margaret stalks across the room until she’s standing right in front of Regina.

“What are you doing?” Mary Margaret demands. 

Regina looks stunned, she hadn’t been expecting this. 

“That man loves you!” Mary Margaret continues, and she’s surprising herself with how angry she suddenly feels. “Stop trying to push him away, he lost his child too Regina.” 

Regina glares at her in response. “This has nothing to do with you.”

Something snaps in Mary Margaret with this comment. “You tried to kill yourself!” Her voice is raised now, there’s a rage boiling up inside her. “Not for the first time apparently! How dare you? My daughter sacrificed herself to the darkness to save you! And now you try and throw all that away! I am sorry for what you lost Regina, I truly am, but you owe Emma. You owe me and David for that matter. You don’t have the right to just throw your life away. What about Henry? He might have already lost one mother! That boy is devastated, he needs you. This has to stop Regina, you have got to stop pushing everyone away. You can get through this and you can save my daughter.” 

A second passes and Mary Margaret herself is shocked by her own outburst. 

Regina sits, rooted to the spot, staring at Mary Margaret. 

“Regina…I…” Mary Margaret begins to speak, starts trying to form an apology. She hadn’t meant to say what she’d said but all the fear and frustration that’s been building for months had suddenly found a focal point. There was some truth to her words, she did on some level feel that way but the rational part of her mind knew that this wasn’t Regina’s fault, she tried to stop Emma. Before she can explain, Regina vanishes from the room in puff of purple smoke.


	8. Chapter 8

Regina appears in her vault and immediately stumbles back, the effort of teleporting herself taking its toll. She sits on top of the chest, still stunned by Mary Margaret’s outburst. 

She’d had to get out of there. 

The thing about it is, Mary Margaret was right she tells herself. She’s spent so long trying to be ‘good’ and do the right thing and in the end, she’s just been the same selfish person she was. She’s let Henry down. Again. She’s been a terrible mother to him his whole life. It’s probably for the best her baby, her daughter, didn’t have to suffer through having her as a mother. Robin will come to see that, she reasons. He’ll realise how much better things are without her bringing darkness into his life.

She’s formulating a plan as she sits there. She knows now what she needs to do. She should have done it weeks ago. The thought has crossed her mind, more than once, but she’d had the baby to think about, she’d let herself hope. She should have known better. 

Emma should never have done what she did, it wasn’t worth it, not to save her. 

 

As soon as Regina disappears, Mary Margaret gets her cell phone out.

“David! I’ve messed up.” She says as soon as he answers. 

He can hear the distress in her voice and tries his best to calm her as she explains what happened. They agree to meet in town so they can go looking for Regina together. 

She debates whether or not to make her next call as she quickly makes her way back into town, but she realizes she has to call Robin and let him know what’s happened. He groggily answers the phone but he quickly comes round when she explains what's happened and to his credit he doesn’t get angry or annoyed with Mary Margaret, but she suspects that’s because he’s too busy being terrified about what Regina might do now. 

 

Mary Margaret rushes down main street, she can see David and Hook standing outside Granny’s, Robin just joining them. The dwarves and Granny come out from the diner and search parties are heading off in different directions as she reaches David. 

Between them, they check Regina’s vault, Emma’s house, the docks, Regina’s house, the cannery, the town hall, anywhere any of them can think to look. They find nothing. 

 

By the time it’s dark, Robin is frantic as everyone regroups outside Granny’s. 

Suddenly there’s a flash of light and Regina and Emma appear in the street. Regina’s bruised and bloodied, but she appears to have to upper hand now in the fight that’s clearly going on. There’s fireballs flying and waves of magic being emitted by both women. It’s clear to them all this has been going on for a while. Hook, Robin, Mary Margaret and David all try to go towards Emma and Regina but their friends hold them back. 

“What’s happening?” Mary Margaret asks. 

“I have no idea…” David answers. 

Suddenly, Emma’s on the ground and the dark one dagger appears in Regina’s hand. Before Emma has a chance to react, Regina plunges the dagger into her right shoulder. 

Everyone looking on gasps in shock. 

The black tendrils of the dark ones power leave Emma and travel into Regina. 

No one looking on can say anything, they’re in shock at what they’re seeing. 

Emma lies on the ground, clutching her shoulder, her hair and clothes suddenly back to normal. 

Regina stands still as the last of the darkness travels into her. Slowly she lifts her head, still clutching the dagger that now bears her name. 

She looks down at Emma. “Thank you for trying Emma.” She says with strained smile. She waves a hand towards Emma, who can’t help but flinch. It takes Emma a second to realise what’s happened, her shoulder is fine now, completely healed. “Look after Henry. Tell him I love him.” 

Emma’s shocked by what’s just happened, she tries to scramble to her feet but before she can, Regina disappears right in front of her. Mary Margaret runs to her daughter, followed closely by David, Hook, Robin and everyone else. 

“Emma!” Mary Margaret helps her daughter up, hugging her tightly, David hugs them both. 

Hook waits until they release her before gathering her in his arm. “I’ve missed you Swan.” He tells her. 

Robin stands back from the scene slightly, still in shock. “What just happened?” He asks. 

They all turn to look at him as he stares at Emma. 

“I’m not sure.” Emma answers. “There was a fight…She saved me.”

“And now there’s a new dark one.” David adds, leave it to him to state the obvious yet again. 

“The Evil Queen with the power of the Dark One, now there’s a terrifying thought.” Hook quips. 

Robin glares at him and the crowd gathers all worry for a second that there’s about to be another fight, but Robin calms when Mary Margaret puts a hand on his shoulder. 

“We’ll find a way to get her back.” Mary Margaret tells him. 

 

Regina appears in the dark one vault, she has to do this quickly, she tells herself. She waves her hand to seal the vault, she has to make sure it can’t get out. She looks down at the dagger in her hand, feeling bile rise at the back of throat at the sight of her name on it. 

“Not this time.” She says out loud, to herself. She’s determined she will win the fight against the darkness this time. 

She takes the dagger and turns it towards herself, she hesitates for moment, the darkness within fighting to stop her, but she’s determined, and in the end, Regina wins out. She thrusts the knife into her abdomen. 

Regina sinks to her knees, watching as the dark energy leaves her body. She pulls the dagger out, throwing it to the floor in front of her. She can’t help but smile when she sees it’s blank now, even as she clutches at the wound in her stomach, blood seeping through her fingers and pooling on the floor.

The black energy gathers itself in front of her, she can feel the rage radiating from it. It has no form but she could swear it’s watching her. 

It’s the strangest feeling, but she’s almost euphoric. “I won.” She says with a laugh, addressing the swirling ball of energy in front of her. “There’s nowhere to go.” She taunts it. 

The energy lashes out towards her, knocking her backwards. Regina laughs again, despite the pain in her stomach. She feels weak now, it won’t be long. 

She opens her eyes and she’s confused, instead of seeing the ceiling in the dark one vault she sees the night sky, the stars and suddenly Robin’s face. 

“Regina!” He’s holding her hand, cradling her head with his other. “You’re going to be ok.” 

She can feel hands pushing down on the wound, there’s a babble of voices around her, but all she can see is Robin. 

She reaches up to touch his face, smiling. “It’s better this way.” She tells him. “I won! I beat it. It’s trapped in the vault.” 

“Shhh. Save your strength my love.” Robin replies, kissing her forehead. 

Regina shakes her head. “It had to be this way…” Her voice is getting weaker, her eyes starting to glaze. “I love you.” She tells him. “But it’s better this way, you’ll be happier.”

Robin looks at Mary Margaret and David who are desperately trying to help stop the blood flowing from the stab wound. He can tell instantly they think it’s hopeless. 

Looks pass between them and suddenly everyone gathered around Regina’s prone body is backing away, allowing the couple some privacy. 

“I love you. I will always love you.” Robin vows. 

Regina looks at him and smiles again. “At least I don’t have to die a villain.”

Before he can answer her, Robin suddenly finds himself flying backwards through the air. He looks up to see the same creature that tried to drag him to the underworld grabbing Regina’s arm and dragging her off in the direction of the pond. He’s on his feet instantly as his friends rush towards him to help. 

“We have to go after her!” Robin takes off in a run after Regina and the creature, but even knowing where they’re going, it’s too fast, he gets to the park just in time to see the boat disappear into the mist. 

He sinks to his knees as David, Mary Margaret, Hook and Emma catch up. 

“Robin…I’m so sorry.” Mary Margaret tries to comfort him with a hand on his shoulder. 

“No.” Robin replies resolutely. “This isn’t over. I have to find a way to go after her.”


	9. Chapter 9

Robin shrugs Mary Margaret’s hand off his shoulder, stands and starts back towards home determinedly. 

“Robin?” Mary Margaret shouts after him.

“I have to get back to my boys, I left Henry and Roland alone when you called.” He replies without breaking pace. 

David, Mary Margaret, Hook and Emma follow after him. They’re all in shock, trying to process what’s just happened as they walk towards the house. There’s no conversation but at various points David, Mary Margaret and Killian all find themselves with their arm around Emma’s shoulder or touching her arm, any kind of physical contact they can manage to confirm to themselves that she’s back. They lag behind Robin as he storms towards home. 

“Mom!” Henry rushes towards Emma, throwing his arms around her seconds after they all step through the front door of Regina’s mansion. 

“Hey kid.” She says as she holds him tightly. “I’ve missed you.” 

“Me too.” Henry tells her, he steps back from her, looking around at the rest of his family and as he does so it becomes obvious something is wrong. “Where’s my mom?” He asks, made hesitant by the looks on the faces of his grandparents and Robin, as he does so Roland appears at the bottom of the stairs, sleepily clutching his blanket. 

“What’s going on Papa?” Roland asks, rubbing his eyes.

Robin picks his son up, wrapping his blanket around him. 

Emma gently guides Henry towards the family room as everyone follows. Emma sits on one end of the couch, guiding Henry to sit in the middle and Robin sits at the other end with Roland on his knee. David stands with his arm around Mary Margaret, Hook beside them.

Emma opens her mouth to try to explain to Henry what’s happened, but she pauses, she’s not even sure herself what just happened, how can she possibly explain it to someone else. 

“Mom please, just tell me what’s happened. Is my mom ok?” Henry pleads, growing more worried by the minute. 

“Henry…” Emma takes his hands in hers. “Regina saved me.”

“I knew she would.” Henry says with a proud smile that fades when he sees the look on Emma’s face. “Is she…” He pauses, scared to say it in case it makes it true, but he has to know. “Dead?”

Emma’s head drops, confirming the news for Henry. 

“No!” He cries out, throwing himself into his mother’s arms as tears start to fall.

Robin’s jaw clenches as Roland looks up at him, his eyes wide and filled with tears. He reaches out and touches Henry’s shoulder, gently turning him to look at him. 

“Henry, your mother didn’t die, she was taken.” Robin tells him, his eye contact unwavering.

Henry looks from Robin to Emma then his grandparents and back to Robin, “Taken? I don’t understand.”

“Do you recall when I was attacked by the creature trying to take me to the underworld?” Robin asks and he waits for Henry’s nod before he continues. “The same beast took your mother.” He tells him. He knows this is difficult information for a boy of his age to take, but he also knows how Henry has demonstrated a maturity far beyond his years on many occasions, he won’t patronise the boy now. 

“So…she’s in the underworld?” Henry asks, trying to take in what he’s being told. 

“So it would seem.” Robin says. Roland grabs his father’s shirt, eyes even wider, he’s too young to fully understand what’s going on but he’s taken in enough to be frightened by what he’s hearing. “But I swear to you, I swear to both of you.” He says, addressing Henry and Roland now. “I will find a way to bring your mother back to you.” 

A moment passes as Henry and Roland look to Robin with hope filled eyes. Mary Margaret deliberately clears her throat. “Umm, Robin, could a have a word with you, in the hall.” She says walking out into the hall. 

Robin stands, placing Roland onto the couch and follows Mary Margaret out, he looks at her expectantly, waiting for her to begin. 

“Do you really think promising the boys you’re going to bring Regina back is the best thing?” She asks.

“Yes. I want them to know that I won’t rest until I bring her back to them.” Robin replies, resolute. 

“Robin, I’m not sure false hope is the best thing for them.” Mary Margaret says gently. 

Robin’s expression hardens. “There’s nothing false about it, I am going to get her back.”

“Robin, we don’t even know if she’s alive!” Mary Margaret argues, her voice getting a little louder.

“She is alive!” Robin’s getting angry now. “I cannot believe after everything that has just happened you of all people are trying to dissuade me. If this were Emma or David there wouldn’t even be a discussion, you would be marching off to the underworld with a stirring speech about not giving up hope and Regina and I would be right behind you.” His voice is much louder now and there’s no doubt everyone else in the house has heard him.

Mary Margaret is dumbstruck. Everyone joins them in the hallway, Emma has her hands on Henry’s shoulders, trying to offer reassurance. Hook is carrying Roland, who is close to tears again. 

“He’s right.” It’s David who speaks first. “We have to at least try.”

Mary Margaret sighs. “I know. It’s just…I mean, it’s the underworld, where do we even begin?”

“Belle might have a book or two that can point us in the right direction.” Hook offers, trying to offer a reassuring smile to Roland as he does so. 

“I can’t believe I’m going to say this but, I kind of wish Gold was around, if there’s anyone who’d know about the underworld it’s him.” David says in a resigned tone. 

Emma’s head snaps up as she suddenly remembers. “Oh my god!” She exclaims. “Gold! He’s in my basement.” 

They all turn to look at her.

“I was the dark one!” She says defensively. “He was part of a plan that made perfect sense at the time.” She shrugs. “I should probably go let him out. Man, he’s gonna pissed.”

“This is not how I thought my day would go…” David says, shaking his head. 

“Really Prince Charming, this is the most absurd day you’ve had.” Emma replies sarcastically. 

“You’ll forgive me if I don’t accompany you to rescue the crocodile.” Hook tells Emma. “I think this young lad should be back to his bed.” He looks to Robin for confirmation that he is happy for him to go ahead and take the boy upstairs, Robin nods his head and Killian heads upstairs with the boy. There’s a lot he’ll do for Emma but rushing to the aid of a man he’s been trying to kill for more years than he can count is not something he’s ready for.

“I’ll come with you to get Gold.” David tells Emma.

Emma offers her father a half-hearted smile, “Thanks.” She hugs Henry again, “We’ll find a way to fix this kid.” She tells him, kissing his forehead before turning and heading out with David. 

“I need to see Belle.” Robin says, heading for the door after them. “Will you stay with the boys?” He asks Mary Margaret.

The thought crosses her mind to argue with him that tonight is perhaps not the best time to ask for Belle’s help considering she’s about to be reunited with the man she loves. As good a person as Belle is, Mary Margaret has her doubts that she’ll spend the first night she’s reunited with Gold researching a way to save the woman who held her in a cell for 28 years but Mary Margaret resists the urge to voice her concerns. She’s acutely aware of her role in today’s events and the perception that she’s been nothing but negative about the prospect of rescuing Regina. The truth is she wants nothing more than to see Regina returned to Storybrooke. As complicated as their relationship is, they’ve been on much better terms recently and she’s seen more of the bright, beautiful and loving woman who taught her about the magic of true love. What terrifies Mary Margaret is thought of who might return, not only did Regina have the terrible influence of the Dark One in her, but now they can only assume she’s been dragged off to the underworld, who knows what she was suffering through. Would it cause her to revert to her dark ways? Mary Margaret wasn’t sure she could bear to see that again. She voices none of this, instead simply replying to Robin’s request with a nod and saying. “Of course.” 

“I’m coming with you.” Henry tells Robin. “My Grandpa is more likely to help if I ask.” He states, referring to Gold.

Robin wants to argue, his first instinct is to protect the boy he’s come to think of as another son, but the fact is, he’s right. Robin holds the door open while Henry puts his coat on. “Let’s go.” He puts his arm around Henry as they head down the path, a look of absolute determination on both their faces.


	10. Chapter 10

“It took a while but the lad’s asleep.” Hook tells Mary Margaret as he walks into Regina’s living room. “He doesn’t really understand what’s going on.”

“He knows enough to be frightened.” Mary Margaret replies with a rueful smile, this was a side to Killian Jones she hadn’t really seen much of. 

“Aye, maybe so, but he also knows enough to know that if there’s a way to bring her back his father’s going to find it.” He tells her.

“Do you really think it’s possible? To find a way to the underworld and bring someone back?” Mary Margaret asks, her tone doubtful.

“I think many things that sound impossible happen in this town.” He replies with a shrug. “There may not be much love lost between the Queen and I, but what she did brought my Emma back to me and Robin is a good man who I consider a friend so I will do whatever I can to help.”

Mary Margaret looks up, wide-eyed with surprise at his statement. “Really?”

“Aye, and I’m sure your daughter will feel the same way.” He replies. There’s a pause as he studies her for a moment. “Your blaming yourself won’t help Regina.”

“What?” Mary Margaret is surprised by how easily he seems to be reading her. 

He raises an eyebrow in response. “I have a great deal of experience with carrying guilt, I know it when I see it.”

“This is my fault, I lost my temper with her.” Mary Margaret stands up from the couch where she’d been sitting, walking over to the fireplace and suddenly finding an ornament on the mantelpiece a source of fascination, she stands with her back to Hook. 

“Seems she was on a path to self-destruction before that.” Hook says. 

“But I pushed her.” Mary Margaret replies, then turns to look at Hook. “She lost her child Killian.” 

“So had you. Again.” He says with a small shrug.

Mary Margaret shakes her head. “No, it’s different, Emma didn’t die.”

“But she was taken from you. Twice. And both times Regina was the reason, seems to me you had reason to be angry with her, recent bereavement or not.” He sounds almost callous, or he would if you didn’t know better. 

Mary Margaret sighs, he’s not wrong, but he’s not entirely right either. “It’s more complicated than that.” She tells him in a resigned tone, turning to the fireplace again. “If I had just kept my mouth shut about Daniel none of this would have happened.” She mutters to herself. 

“And there it is.” Hook says with a smile. “The true crux of the issue. Swan’s told me the terrible tale of Regina’s lost true love. I think everyone in their right mind would agree that you have more than paid the price for a secret that told in good faith at the tender age of 10. You need to let that go, if there’s a hope in…” He trails off, realising what he’s about to say and then says it with a laugh. “Hell. Literally, of retrieving her, it’ll be with you and your husbands help, but your motivation should not be guilt. I don’t claim to know much about how things work there, though I fully expect I’ll find out one day, but I can’t imagine arriving with a burden of guilt like the one you’re carrying offers the best chance of success.” 

Mary Margaret frowns. “Are you always this perceptive?”

Hook laughs, “That’s for me to know and you to wonder.”

“Why do you even care?” She asks, unsure of his motives for this very unexpected heart to heart.

“Because Emma does. And if anything happened to you, she would not be happy.” He says, his tone the most sincere it’s been since the conversation began. 

Mary Margaret smiles. “Try as you might to hide it Killian Jones, you’re a good man.”

“Not always.” He admits.

“But you’re trying, sometimes that’s enough.” She smiles, her instinct is to hug him but she suspects that would be going a bit far. 

Hook bows his head. “I’ll go and see if I can be of assistance elsewhere.” He says with a smile and then heads towards the door leaving Mary Margaret alone with her thoughts.

A heart to heart with the pirate who loves her daughter was just about the last thing she had been expecting, but then tonight had been full of surprises, and while it had far from assuaged her guilt about what had happened, she did feel slightly more hopeful. Her entire, extremely messy and complicated, family was coming together and if they all worked together maybe, just maybe, it was possible. They would need Gold’s help though and that might truly be the tricky part. 

 

Robin bursts through the door to Gold’s shop nearly taking the bell off the wall. Belle almost jumps out of her skin but when she looks up and sees who it is that’s barged into the shop, and Henry behind him, she’s both relieved and anxious at the same time.

“Robin! Are you alright? I heard what happened.” Belle speaks quickly, her mind racing at all the possibilities of what could be going on.

“I need your help.” Robin replies. 

“Of course!” Belle’s quick to agree.

“Regina’s been taken, dragged off the underworld by some creature.” Robin tells her. “I need you to find a way for me to follow her. I need to go after her and get her back.”

“I don’t understand.” Belle’s only getting half the story and it’s not making any sense to her. 

“My mom saved my mom from the dark one curse and then the same thing that tried to drag Robin off came and took her.” Henry tries to fill in the blanks for her with the very basic version of the story he’s been told so far. 

Belle takes a moment to process what’s Henry’s said, figuring out which mom he refers to doing what. “So Emma’s not the Dark One anymore?” She asks, frowning. 

“No.” Henry replies. 

“So is Regina?” She asks, alarmed at the thought.

“No.” Robin answers this time. “She told me she trapped the dark one magic in its vault.” He explains.

Suddenly Belle realises the implication of what she’s been told. “So if Emma’s no longer the Dark One did she tell you where Rumple is?” She asks eagerly, just as she says it the door to the shop opens again. 

“I’m right here.” Gold says with a smile as he walks towards Belle. 

Belle runs out from behind the counter and hugs him. “Are you ok? Where have you been?” She’s brimming with questions for him, having not seen him since Emma kidnapped him.

“I’m fine.” He replies as he holds her tightly. “I’ve missed you.”

Belle backs out of his embrace, giving Gold a look that very plainly conveys the sentiment of ‘We’ll talk later’ and then turn her attention back to the group who have gathered in the shop. “Emma, it’s good to see you.” She tells her with a genuine smile, glad to see her back to her old self.

“Thanks.” Emma replies. “Did Robin get you up to speed?” She asks.

“Sort of.” Belle replies with a frown. “I’m not sure how much help I can be though, finding a way to the underworld…I don’t know even know if such a thing is a possible.”

“It is.” Gold tells them. 

“Grandpa please, you have to help us get my mom back!” Henry pleads. 

“It will not be easy.” He looks over to Belle, gauging her reaction. His motive to help in this situation for from unselfish, he’s seeking redemption in Belle’s eyes. If rescuing Regina was a way to accomplish that then that’s what he would do, and all the better if it helped assuage some of the burden of guilt he now truly felt since the dark one curse was lifted from him. It had almost overwhelmed him at first, his guilt, all the lives he had destroyed over the years, Regina’s included. Even now he doubted she knew the true scale of the manipulations that had gone into making her the Evil Queen, he had taken a truly innocent young girl and twisted her into what he needed her to be. 

“Whatever it takes.” Robin tells him, resolute in his determination that he would see her again.


	11. Chapter 11

The group has gathered once again in Gold’s shop. Two days have passed since Regina was carried off to the underworld, two days in which the group has worked day and night to gather the supplies Gold has told them will be necessary in order to both get to and return from the underworld. They’ve finally gathered everything he’s demanded, not an easy task considering some of the items on the list. 

Emma had returned their memories of Camelot via the dreamcatchers, along with many profuse apologies for her actions as the dark one.

Robin was now haunted by memories of Regina at the ball, how beautiful and happy she’d looked, how they’d enjoyed that night, dancing and laughing. The rush of fear he’d felt as he seen the blade. He’d felt more than a twinge at the site of his wound since his memories were returned though he was sure it was his mind playing tricks on him.

“Is that everything?” Robin asks, addressing his question to Gold. “Can we go now?” He’s grown more anxious and frustrated as every hour has passed since Regina was ripped away from him. 

“Patience.” Gold admonishes him. “We’re hardly nipping off for a pleasant day trip here. We need to ensure we’ve a plan, preparation is key. I should be ready by tonight.”

Robin sighs, frustration evident, Emma puts a hand on his forearm, giving him an understanding smile to offer support. 

“Tonight.” She repeats. “We should probably get some rest then.”

“Before you go, I need to know exactly how many will be travelling?” Gold asks. 

“I’ll go alone.” Robin states. 

“Uh, absolutely not.” Mary Margaret argues. “I’m coming with you.”

“Well then I’m coming too.” David states. 

Mary Margaret turns to him. “No.”

“What?” He’s taken aback by her statement.

“David, there’s too much we don’t know. What if we’re trapped or…anything could happen. We can’t take the chance of leaving Neal and orphan, I won’t let you.” Mary Margaret is determined.

“Then let me go in your place.” David argues, he can understand her argument truth be told.

“No, I have to do this.” She will not be dissuaded from this. 

“Me too.” Emma, who along with the others has been watching her parents argue, joins the conversation. 

“Emma…” Mary Margaret is about to argue with her daughter but Emma interrupts her before she can begin.

“You have your reasons and I have mine. You can save your breath, there’s no way I’m not doing this.” Emma is as determined as her mother. 

“Well, I might as well come and get a preview of what to expect when my time comes.” Hook speaks up next.

Emma turns to him. “Killian, you don’t have to.”

“Save it Swan, if you’re going I’m going. Besides, you know me, hate to be left out.” He says with a smirk.

“I’m coming too.” Henry speaks next. 

“I don’t think so kid!”

“Absolutely not!”

Emma and Robin speak at the same time, both sharing the same sentiment. 

“I’m not just a kid, I’m the author, I can help!” Henry argues.

“Henry I know you want to help, but the best thing you can do is stay here and stay safe.” Emma tells him, putting an arm around his shoulders. 

“Your mother would never forgive us for allowing you to place yourself in harms way.” Robin adds.

“Besides kid, we might need you up here to write us out of there.” Emma says with a smile.

Henry’s not happy about it, but he realizes he’s not going to win this argument. 

“Very well, that makes five then.” Gold says.

“Who’s the fifth?” Emma asks, confused.

“I am.” He replies.

“You’re going to come to the underworld to save Regina.” Mary Margaret asks, incredulous.

“As the person in this room with the best chance of making a return trip possible I would think you would be happy I was volunteering.” He replies.

“It’s not your abilities we’re unsure of.” Emma tells him.

“My motivations then. Well, let’s just say I’m no longer the man you knew. After everything that I’ve caused to happen in Regina’s life, I owe her this.” He tells them, not mentioning his other motivating factor, winning Belle back. He looks over to her and for a split second he’s sure he can see pride on her face. “I suggest we meet at the pond at 8pm.” Everyone begins to file out of the shop, once on the street Robin attracts David and Henry’s attention and pulls them off to the side. 

“I have a favour to ask of you both.” He begins.

“Of course.” David answers for both of them.

“Granny has agreed to take Roland and the baby while I’m gone.” Robin informs them. 

“I would be happy to take them.” David offers. 

“I appreciate that my friend, I do, but you’ve already got one small infant to look after, I wouldn’t want to you burden you.” Robin replies earnestly. “All I ask is that you watch over them for me. If Zelena realizes that both myself and Regina are gone there’s a chance she’ll try something.” 

“We won’t let her hurt either of them.” Henry tells Robin. 

“Of course, we’ll make sure no harm comes to them.” David says. 

“Thank you both. Sincerely.” Robin truly is grateful, he can see in David’s eyes he’s prepared to do whatever it takes to keep his boys safe.

“I’ll catch up with you Gramps.” Henry tells David, more than hinting at him to leave him and Robin alone. 

“I’ll meet you at Granny’s.” David agrees to the boys’ unspoken request.

“Robin, I need to ask you something.” Henry says, a very serious expression on his face. 

“Go ahead.” Robin frowns, unsure where there is going. 

Henry hesitates for moment, thinking how best to phrase what he wanted to ask. “Do you love my mom?” 

Robin’s first reaction is to be offended at the question. “Of course I do! How can you even ask that?”

“My mom tries to hide a lot from me, but she was devastated when you left.” Henry still carries some anger over how hurt his mother was.

Robin visibly sags, Henry’s hitting a sore spot. “Henry, that was a complicated situation.”

“I know that.” Henry’s defensive now. “But I also know that you left my mom and that now you’ve got a new baby with another woman.” 

“Henry…” Robin doesn’t even know where to begin. 

“I need to know, I need you to promise me that once you bring her home you will not hurt her again.” Henry is dead serious, this is a conversation he’s been wanting to have with Robin for a while. He knows this is probably not the best time, but there never seems to be a good time. “After everything that’s happened, after…the baby, I don’t think she could take it.”

“Henry, I can’t promise you that I won’t ever make any mistakes ever again.” As uncomfortable as this conversation is, Robin senses it’s been a long time coming and he won’t lie to the boy. “I love your mother more than I can properly express with words. What happened before, when I left…I found myself in an impossible situation and I did what I thought was right at the time.” Robin pauses, feeling more than a little awkward to be discussing these matters with the teenager. “What I can promise you is that once we’re reunited, I will do everything in my power to ensure we are never separated again and I will dedicate the rest of my life to making your mother happy.” Robin then smiles, realizing something, Henry has no doubt that Robin will bring Regina home. Even with this resentment that he has been silently carrying, he also apparently has absolutely no doubt in his mind that Robin will literally march into hell after his mother and bring her back. 

Henry nods, satisfied with the answer. “Just so you know, if you do hurt her you’ll have to answer me.” He’s deadly serious again.

“Understood.” Robin says with a solemn nod. “Henry, I hope you know that I care about you as well. You’ve obviously been holding on to this resentment for some time, I want you to know that you can talk to me about anything. I would hate to think there was any bad feeling between us.” 

“I just had to be sure, that’s all.” Henry tells him solemnly. “I was pretty sure I knew the answer.” He adds with a self-assured shrug.

Robin smiles again. “Well, I’m glad we cleared that up.”

“Me too.” Henry smiles back and they pair head to Granny’s together to meet David.

 

When they arrive at Granny’s, David is sitting in a booth with Mary Margaret and Emma. Henry hesitates for a moment, and it doesn’t go unnoticed. He has been wary around Emma, despite himself. He knows she was under the influence of the worst dark magic, he knows her actions were not her own and he knows that his mother would never do anything to hurt him when she’s herself. And yet, he can’t quite get the image of Emma ripping out Violet’s heart and sending her off to break his heart out of his mind. They’d talked, Emma had apologised, there had been tears and hugging and Henry was trying his hardest to not hold anything against her. It was one thing knowing what his mother had done, but remembering it made it all the more real. He couldn’t quite process everything, his main focus at the moment was his mom, trapped in the underworld. One crisis at a time was about all he could handle right now. He shakes himself from his thoughts and joins his mother and grandfather for dinner while Robin goes to spend time with Roland and the baby before they leave.

8pm comes and the group gathers again at the pond that Gold informs them can be used as a portal to the underworld. The thought of the spot where they’ve all taken their children to feed ducks having such a sinister use is more than a little disturbing.

David holds Mary Margaret tightly. “Stay safe, don’t make me come find you.” He says with a knowing smile. 

Belle says her goodbyes to everyone, finishing in an awkward embrace with Rumple. She moves to stand with David and Henry and they watch from the shore as the group disappears into the mist that appears surrounds a sinister looking boat they board.


	12. Chapter 12

It had taken Regina days to figure out what had happened to her. One minute she was lying on the ground dying in Robin’s arm and the next she was wandering around a deserted palace, her palace. The place looked war torn, debris littering the corridors, what was left of them. She tried to leave the palace many times, walking for miles but no matter which direction she went in she ended up back in the castle grounds. It was hot, the sun was blinding and hotter than she had ever felt it before, night never came, there was no relief from it. Regina had no idea how long she’d been here but it had to be weeks now, months. In hell. At first she’d been alone, but slowly people started to appear. She didn’t recognise them at first, she’d tried talking to them but no one ever answered, at first they just ignored but then they’d started to glare at her, then shove her out of their way and now when she saw someone, they would attack her. They’ve been hunting her…it feels like forever. 

She knows who they are now though, and there’s a part of her that feels she should just give herself over, let them have their revenge. They’re all here because of her after all. 

Regina has taken refuge in her old bedchambers, hiding from the mob and trying to rest. She’s battered and bruised since her last encounter with a few of her victims. She’s exhausted and she just wants this to end. The irony is not lost on her that this room seems to be her only sanctuary, the memories this room elicits are far from pleasant.

She closes her eyes to try to rest and it starts again. That noise. Every time she tries to rest she is tormented by this sound. The wails of a baby. Somehow though, she knows, she can feel it, the cries are from her baby. Try as she might though she can never find where they're coming from. Every time she tries she ends up running into another of her victims. She’d barely managed to get away last time. Regina clamps her hands over her ears, trying to drown out the noise, screwing her eyes closed as it only seems to grow louder. 

She feels a hand on her arm and she doesn’t move, this is it, they’ve found her and she’s resigned herself to whatever fate they have instore for her, it surely can’t be worse than listening to her child’s distressed cries. 

“Oh my sweet girl.” 

Regina freezes as she recognises the voice. She opens her eyes, the cries have stopped. 

“Mother?” 

Cora tucks a stray strand of hair behind Regina’s ear, stroking her face affectionately as she does so. Regina almost recoils in shock, it’s perhaps the most affectionate gesture she’s ever received from her mother. 

Suddenly there’s banging on the door of her bedchambers and Regina can hear the sounds of the mob outside. 

“Come on, we have to get out her.” Cora says, grabbing Regina’s hand and pulling her up off the bed and towards a large mirror. No, not a mirror Regina realises, the mirror she’d used to banish her mother to Wonderland. Regina pulls her hand from Cora’s, reluctant to follow her mother through. “We’re not safe here anymore.” Cora tells her, a sense of urgency in her voice. Just as she says it they can hear the door begin to buckle. Cora grabs Regina’s hand again and pulls her through the looking glass.

Regina stands, confused and surprised when they emerge into her childhood home. 

“We’ll be safe here.” Cora tells Regina.

Regina stands in front of the fireplace that hid the entrance to her mother’s vault, she’s exhausted, beaten, bruised and bloody. Her clothes are ripped and tattered and somehow, her mother stands before her looking immaculate in a pant suit. 

“I don’t understand any of this.” Regina tells her. 

“I know.” Cora says with a gentle smile, she approaches her daughter and with an arm around her waist guides her to sit on the sofa. 

Regina looks at her mother strangely, this is not the woman she grew up fearing. It’s a trick of some sort, it has to be. 

“Oh I’m very real Regina dear.” Cora tells her, seeing the confusion on her face. “I got my heart back before I died, remember?” She says by way of explanation.

Regina frowns, none of this makes any sense to her. 

“There’s a lot you don’t understand about this place, I’ll try to explain things, but first I need you to explain to me how you ended up here without being dead.”

“I…It’s a long story.” Regina hesitates, still trying to comprehend what’s happening. This can’t really be her mother, can it?

“Yes, I can see that.” Cora says, suddenly focused on the wound that was still present in Regina’s stomach, though she’d felt no pain from it since her arrival in this place. “You’ve been stabbed.” Cora says as she pulls up Regina’s top to get a better look at the wound. 

“It’s not sore.” Regina says.

“No, that’s because you had this before you arrived.” Cora says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “Here, lay back, let me see it properly.” She says, guiding Regina to lay on the couch. She hovers her hands over the wound, an intense look of concentration on her face. 

Regina looks down to see the wound disappear. 

“There’s not much magic here, but I managed to find a little.” Cora tells her. “There’s a protection spell around the house, I couldn’t manage much at the palace but it was enough to keep you safe until I could get there.”

Regina makes a move to sit up but Cora puts a hand on her shoulder to gently hold her down. “You’re exhausted, get some rest.”

Regina relents and lays back on the sofa with an exasperated sigh, she’s still not convinced that this is her mother but she’s approaching the point where she’s too tired to fight so she closes her eyes, hoping desperately for the oblivion of a dreamless sleep. It’s the closest she’s managed to come to sleeping, just at that point where she’s ready to succumb to the oblivion when the crying starts again. Regina can feel her eyes filling with tears, so many emotions are running through her. She just wants this to be over.

“Oh my darling girl.” Cora stands over her daughter, a pained expression on her face, she can hear it too. She waves a hand over Regina’s forehead sending her to sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

“Where the bloody hell are we?” It’s Hook who’s the first to speak when the mist clears and they find themselves travelling down a river in a forest. 

Gold smirks. “I believe the answer is in the question.”

“This is the underworld?” Emma asks sceptically, this is not exactly what she had been expecting. 

“This is literally Regina’s own personal hell.” Gold explains. “It’s different for everyone.”

“This looks like…home.” Mary Margaret’s just as confused as everyone else.

“It is. A version of it anyway.” Gold says, nodding his head in the direction of Regina’s palace, it’s visible off in the distance, what’s left of it. 

“Let’s go.” Robin jumps out of the boat as soon as it’s close enough to the shore, heading in the direction of the palace as quickly as he can. 

The others follow behind him. 

“So this is hell for Regina? A sunnier version of her home?” Hook asks.

“This place was never her home.” Mary Margaret replies sadly, knowing looks pass between her, Emma and Robin.

Hook frowns, there’s clearly more to this story that he doesn’t know but he resolves to speak to Emma about it later, now hardly seems the time.

They trudge through the seemingly endless forest for hours, conversation is minimal as they are all acutely aware of where they are, on edge, wary of what they may encounter. 

When it happens, it’s sudden, Robin’s head snaps round at the sound of a twig snapping and suddenly they were surrounded. 

“And who would these lovely fellows be?” Hook asks, drawing his sword as they slowly advance.

“They look like villagers…” Mary Margaret answers, trailing off as she realises she recognises some of the faces. 

Before there can be anymore conversation they’re under attack, forced to fight off their attackers. They soon realise however that it’s difficult to kill someone who’s already dead, arrows to the chest and stab wounds are ineffective at stopping them. After a protracted battle, in which Rumple is little help, they realise their only option is to injure their legs and make a run for it. 

Once they’re confident they’re clear, they stop to regroup. 

“What the hell was that?” Emma asks, leaning against a tree as she tries to catch her breath.

Gold roles his eyes. “Once again, the answer is in your question.”

Emma frowns before she realises what he means. “Oh, right.”

“You can’t kill someone who’s already dead.” Mary Margaret says out loud what they all realized. “I recognised some of those people.” She pauses. “Marcus helped me when I was on the run from Regina and it cost him his life.”

“That may be dear, but these are not the people you knew.” Gold tells her. 

“What do you mean?” Emma asks.

“They’re here to torment Regina.” Gold replies as if the explanation is obvious. 

“You mean they’re ALL…I mean she...” Emma can’t quite find the right way to put this horrifying realisation into words.

“They didn’t call her the evil queen because of her harsh words love.” Hook says. 

“Dragging up the past isn’t getting us any closer to finding Regina.” Robin interrupts, he’s almost growling. 

“Let’s go.” Mary Margaret agrees. 

They make it to the palace without encountering anyone else. After splitting up to search the palace, they all end up coming together in a corridor on one of the upper floors, despite having set off in different directions. 

“It would seem all paths lead to this door.” Gold states. 

Mary Margaret sighs, she recognizes it as do Gold, Hook and Robin. The layout of the palace is markedly different from how it had been in reality, but this corridor was familiar enough, “I suppose it makes sense, I don’t think she was ever happy here.” Mary Margaret says sadly, pushing the door to Regina’s old bedchambers open. 

Robin rushes into the room behind Mary Margaret, hopeful they might find Regina here. The disappointment is palpable as they find the room empty. 

“Look!” Emma says excitedly, rushing towards the chair at the vanity. Regina’s jacket is hanging on the back of it, she lifts it to show the rest of the group. “She was here.”

“What’s this?” Mary Margaret asks, standing in front of a large mirror. “This was never in this room.” 

Gold approaches and studies the mirror closely. “Ah, but it was.” 

Hook catches on. “That’s the looking glass she banished Cora through.” 

Emma frowns at him, wondering how he would know that. 

“I spent a fair amount of time with Cora, she told me how she came to be in Wonderland.” He shrugged. 

“It seems you may about to be reunited.” Gold tells him. 

“What are you talking about?” Robin asks.

“This isn’t Regina’s doing, it’s her mother’s.” Gold replies.

“Cora’s here?” Mary Margaret asks, alarmed.

“It seems she found a way to her daughter after all.” Gold surmises. 

“So where are they?” Robin is growing more anxious by the minute. 

“They’ve travelled through the looking glass.” Gold gestures towards the mirror.

“So they’re in Wonderland?” Emma asks. 

“No, I don’t think so.” Gold says, touching the mirror.

“More importantly, can we follow?” Robin asks. 

“I think so.” Gold replies. “Miss Swan, we’ll need your magic.” 

“Me?” Emma’s troubled by the suggestion. 

“Yes. Unless anyone else here has suddenly developed any magical powers.” He retorts. 

“I haven’t even tried since I…came back.” Emma’s very uncomfortable at the thought of using magic again. 

“Emma, please.” Robin pleads.

“The light magic you possessed is still very much within you Miss Swan. It will be more difficult in this realm for you to use, but that’s why I brought a little magic with us.” Gold says, opening the bag he’s been carrying with the items he’d had them all procure before they left. He takes a bottle out from his bag and indicated to Emma to put out her hands. She does so, albeit reluctantly and he sprinkles a powder on them, as he does so a white light emanates briefly from them. “Now concentrate Miss Swan, touch the mirror and focus your thoughts on Regina.” 

Emma does as she’s told. For a few moments, nothing happens until finally the mirror shimmers. Emma jumps back, startled by the reaction. 

“Excellent.” Gold smiles. “After you.” He gestures to the mirror. 

Robin steps through first, followed by Mary Margaret, Hook, Emma and then Gold. 

Within seconds the find themselves in front of a fire place, in a large room that seems to function as both dining room and living room. It takes Mary Margaret a second to place where she recognises the room from, she hasn’t been here since she was a little girl after all.

“Oh my god.” She says out loud without realizing. “This is where Regina grew up.” 

They’re all looking around for any sign of Regina or that she’s been here. It’s Robin who spots it first. There’s something over in the corner in the room. 

He approaches, stopping just short when he realizes what he’s seeing.

It’s Regina. She’s sitting in the corner of the room, knees drawn up to chest, arms wrapped around her legs as if she’s trying to make herself as small as possible. She’s rocking back and forth ever so slightly, eyes glazed. She’s barefoot, her clothes are filthy and tattered, there are wounds in various stages of healing underneath tears in the clothing. 

“Regina?” Robin slowly approaches her, trying not to startle her. 

It seems to take a moment before she registers her name being spoken. She looks up and when she sees Robin she shrinks back even further into the corner.

Robin slowly moves closer. “Regina, it’s me.” He says quietly.

Regina starts shaking her head. “No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.” She repeats. “You’re not real.” She whispers, looking back down at the floor.

Robin kneels in front of her, taking her hand and he gently hooks his other hand under her chin, moving her head so she’s looking at him. “I’m real Regina, we’ve come to take you home.”


	14. Chapter 14

Henry, David and Belle stand watching pond for a few minutes, each lost in their own thoughts as it returns to normal. 

“So what do we do now?” Henry asks. 

“I guess we wait.” David answers, sitting on one of the benches. 

Henry sits next to him and a few moments later Belle joins them, a comfortable silence falls over the three, each lost in their thoughts again, contemplating what their loved ones might be facing. 

Five minutes passes before David breaks the silence again. “You guys should head back into town, who knows how long they could be? I’ve arranged it with the dwarves that someone will always be on watch so we’ll know straight away when they’re back. I’ve got first watch, but there’s no reason for you guys to stay out here too.”

“I want to wait with you.” Henry replies.

“Me too.” Belle tells him with a smile. 

“Okay then.” David nods. “Don’t supposed either of you brought a sandwich?” He jokes.

Belle was about to answer when her attention is pulled to the pond, smoke starting to roll out over it again. David and Henry turn to look at it too after seeing the look on Belle’s face.

“Already?” David asks.

“Apparently.” Belle answers.

They can see the boat now and everyone is on it.

“Where’s my mom?” Henry asks, concerned, they can’t see Regina.

The boat stops and Rumple exits first, walking towards land, followed by Hook, then Emma. Robin pauses leaning down and he reappears with an unconscious Regina in his arms, Mary Margaret helps him step off the boat and then they’re both heading towards the shore too.

“Mom!” Henry takes off towards his mother now, running towards Robin to see Regina. “Is she ok?” He asks. “How did you guys get her back so quickly?” 

The group all frown. 

“Quickly?” Emma asks. “There was nothing quick about it.” She frowns again. “Wait, why are you still standing here in the same clothes?” She asks, talking as her mind processes what she’s seeing. “How long were we gone?” She asks.

“About ten minutes.” David answers.

“Ten minutes?” Mary Margaret is shocked. “That can’t be, we were there for at least a day.”

“I feared this might be the case.” Gold speaks now. “Time passes differently in the underworld.”

“And you didn’t think to mention that?” David asks accusingly. 

“I couldn’t be sure.” Gold replies enigmatically. 

“Wait a minute, if we were there ten minutes and it was a whole day for us…Regina’s been there almost three days.” Mary Margaret is horrified at the realisation. 

“If time was passing at the same speed for her, then that’s over a year. No wonder she was a little tetchy.” Hook does the math in his head for them, but can’t resist a joke along with the information. He has the good grace to look a little sheepish when Emma throws him a look. 

“We should get Regina to the hospital.” Mary Margaret says, trying to move things along.

“No.” Robin replies resolutely, still holding Regina in his arms and pulling her even closer to him. “That’s the last place she would want to wake up. I’m taking her home.”

“Robin, she’s not sleeping, she’s unconscious she should probably get checked over. Not to mention we have no idea what else she’s been through.” Emma tries to reason with him.

“The powder I used will cause her no harm I assure you.” Gold says. “She’ll awaken in a few hours.” 

“Powder?” David asks, confused.

“Let’s just say Regina was less than co-operative when we found her and time was a factor.” Gold replies with his usual inscrutable smile.

“Yeah, we’re going to have a discussion about that later.” Emma tells him, still angry with him.

“Enough.” Robin snaps. “The doctor can visit Regina at home, where she will be in her own bed.” He tells them, walking towards the edge of the park where he was really very much hoping to find David’s truck parked. If he had to, he would carry Regina the whole distance home, she was frighteningly light in his arms, but he was tiring, it had been a long and eventful day and he just wanted to get her to safety as soon as he possibly could. 

 

Robin had gently placed Regina into bed, he had changed her into clean clothes and with Mary Margaret’s help cleaned and dressed the many wounds that were present on her body. He was sure he could feel physical pain at seeing her like this. What she must have gone through, an entire year alone in that place. At least she appeared to be sleeping peacefully now. 

He’d spoken to their boys, once Belle dropped off Roland from Granny’s, reassuring them that everything would be fine and he’d wished he’d felt as confident as he hoped he’d managed to sound. Henry steadfastly refused to leave the mansion as did Roland, copying his big brothers every action right down to crossing his arms. Emma, Mary Margaret and David, along with baby Neal, were all downstairs with the boys, trying their best to keep them occupied. He’d checked in with Granny who was happy to keep the baby as planned tonight. His focus right now had to be Regina as much as it pained him to be away from his new son. 

He watched her as she slept, lying on her back, arms resting at her sides outside of the covers, it was an unnatural position to see her sleeping in, she was always restless in her sleep, turning from side to side. He was pulled from his thoughts when he saw a flicker of an expression flit across her brow, she was coming to. He wanted so badly to hold her hand but she hadn’t reacted well to being touched earlier so he resisted. 

Suddenly Regina’s eyes flew open, an expression of panic across her face. She sat bolt upright and immediately moved herself so her back was flush against the headboard, drawing her legs up to her chest, making herself as small as possible and as far away as she could get on the bed. 

“Regina, it’s me, you’re safe.” Robin tries to reassure her, holding his hands out in front of himself palms up, trying to look as non-threatening as possible.

“No. No, it’s not real. Don’t believe.” Regina screws her eyes shut, her head down, repeating the words like a mantra. 

“Regina.” Robin tries to get her attention. “Regina look at me.” He tries again, a little more forcefully but still getting no response. He reaches out to touch her arm and just as he makes contact a bright light throws him backwards, into the wall of the bedroom causing him to land in a heap on the floor. He groans, he hadn’t been expecting that but he forces himself to stand quickly, he’s not injured, just winded.

Regina’s holding her hands out in front of her, palms facing towards herself, staring at them with a look that’s a mix of horror and bewilderment. 

“You have your magic because you’re back in Storybrooke. This is real Regina. I’m real. You’re home.” Robin tries again to get through to her. 

It works this time and she looks up at him. “Robin?” She sounds so lost it’s heart-breaking for him to hear. “What have I done?” She asks, appalled that her magic has just thrown him across the room. 

He’s not sure if it’s a movement that gives her away or if he just instinctively knows that she’s about to teleport herself away, either way, he’s not letting her, he grabs her wrists before she can. She stares at him wide eyed, shocked by his actions.

“No you don’t. I’m not letting you out of my sight for quite some time yet.” Robin tells her with a smile, releasing her wrists and taking a step backwards, conscious to give her room. 

“People shouldn’t be near me. I’m a monster.” She tells him, and it’s barely a whisper, her eyes filling with tears.

“Nonsense.” He replies firmly.

He slowly approaches the bed again and sits next to her, his back against the head board and then slowly reaches his arm around her and pulls her into an embrace. She goes willingly, melting into him.

“Did I hurt you?” She whispers.

“No my love.” He replies, kissing her head where it rests against his head tucked under his chin. 

“I’m sorry.” She says, so quietly he almost doesn’t hear. 

“Shhhh.” He soothes, kissing the top of her head. “You have nothing to apologise for.” 

She suddenly sits up, sitting so she’s facing him. “Where’s Henry?” She asks, panicked. “And Roland? Are they ok?”

He takes both her hands in his. “They’re both absolutely fine, they’ve just been worried about you.”

She relaxes back into his arms. Silence falls over the pair, Regina holds a fist full of Robin’s shirt, knuckles white from gripping on so tight, as if she’s afraid if she lets go he’ll disappear.

Robin runs his hand up and down her arm tenderly, trying to offer her reassurance as best her can. “Do you want to talk about it?” He asks after a while.

She shakes her head slowly. More time passes in silence before she finally breaks it. “How long?” She asks, her voice is quiet again. 

“It’s difficult to say exactly.” Robin begins. “Here in Storybrooke, 3 days passed.” He explains. “But time moves differently there. When we came to get you, we were only gone ten minutes but it was a whole day…” He trails off, she’s gone rigid in his arms as she tries to process what he’s saying. 

“3 days…” She trails off, her mind reeling from the information, was it possible that’s all it had been. “I want to see the boys, where are they?” Regina suddenly declares, moving to stand up from bed. 

“Regina.” Robin has a note of caution in his voice, he’s standing beside her and holding her waist to steady her a she sways on her feet, she’s not fit to be out of bed yet. “Please my love, lay down, I’ll have the boys come see you if you’re sure you’re ready.”

Regina relents and sits back down on the bed, Robin remains standing in front of her, holding both of her hands in his, she looks up at him.

“Please.” She pleads. “I need to see my children.” 

He can’t pretend to understand what she’s been through in the underworld, his small taste of it was more than enough for him, but he also can’t pretend he’s not worried. For once she’s not pushing those closest to her away, he’s sure that’s got to count for something. She’s acting differently though, which he supposes is only to be expected, but it’s unexpected, the way she’s suddenly claiming Roland as her own. It’s by no means unwelcome, they’d discussed it on many occasions before but Regina had, up until now, always been fearful of overstepping her bounds, despite Robin’s assurances and the boys’ own declaration by him calling her mama. He suspects the change is driven by the loss of their daughter, but he’s afraid she’ll shut down if he tries to broach the subject.

“I’ll be right back.” He tells Regina, exiting their room and heading downstairs. 

As soon as he enters the living room, everyone’s attention turns to him. 

“Is everything ok?” Mary Margaret asks.

“We heard a noise…” Emma explains.

“Everything’s fine.” Robin replies. “Regina was a little disorientated when she first woke up, we had a little mishap is all.” He says with a wary smile. 

“Mom’s awake? Can I see her?” Henry stands, excitedly.

“Yes, of course, she’d like to see both her boys.” Robin tells Henry and Roland with a smile and before he can say anything else the pair are bounding up the stairs towards her room. 

“A mishap?” David questions.

“Are you sure it’s safe for them to be up there?” Mary Margaret asks.

“She didn’t know where she was, she thought she was still in the underworld. It wasn’t a conscious thing, it seemed instinctual, her magic threw me backwards when I touched her.” Robin explained. “She knows where she is now, she would never hurt the boys.” He says emphatically.

“How is she?” Emma asks.

“Honestly, I don’t know. We didn’t have much of a chance to talk before she asked for the boys, I didn’t have the heart to keep them apart.” Robin replies honestly. “This is all such a mess.”

David puts a comforting hand on Robin’s shoulder. “If anyone can get through this, it’s Regina.” He says.

Robin nods sadly. “I just wish she didn’t have to.”


	15. Chapter 15

Regina’s sitting up in the bed, her back against the headboard again. She can hear the pounding of feet running up the stair and towards her room. She takes a deep breath and prepares herself just as the door to her room is flung open.

“Mom!”

“Mama!” 

The two boys cry out at the same time, stopping just over the threshold and waiting for the split second it takes for Regina to open her arms out in invitation. The two boys then all but throw themselves at her, one either side, she takes turns kissing their heads, holding them close. 

“Mama we missed you.” Roland tells her, his little arms are clinging to her, his head buried into her chest. 

“I missed you too baby.” She says, addressing them both. 

“Are you ok mom?” Henry asks, he’s still holding her hand but he’s pulled back a little so he can see her face.

Regina has an arm protectively around Roland who seems content in her embrace, she gives Henry a tight smile and it doesn’t escape his notice that it doesn’t quite reach her eyes before she answers. “I’m fine sweetheart.” She tells him. “I’m better now my boys are here.” She reaches out to pull him into an embrace again and he relents, leaning into her. 

They sit in silence like that for a while. Roland starts picking at one of the buttons on her pyjamas, both Regina and Henry lost in their own thoughts. 

She’s not sure how long passes before Robin appears at the door with a tray, he clears his throat to get her attention. “Do you think you could manage something to eat?” He asks, gesturing to the tray. It’s nothing fancy, there wasn’t much in the house to work with, some toast, some fruit and a yoghurt. He’d be happy if she ate even one slice of toast.

He does a double take when he looks at her, there’s no trace of all the cuts and bruises she had had when he went downstairs, she must have used magic as soon as he left the room to heal them, for the boys’ benefit he rationalizes. 

“I’m not very hungry.” She tells him. 

“Mom you have to eat.” Henry tells her, he’s noticed too how gaunt she looks. 

“I don’t know if I can.” Regina argues.

“You have to try mama.” Roland tells her with a very serious look on his face. “You always tell me how I can’t grow up to be big and strong if I don’t eat right.”

She smiles, rustling Roland’s hair. “Ok, but I’m really not very hungry so you might have to help me finish.” She tells him. He smiles excitedly, thrilled at the thought of helping, while Henry and Robin watch as Regina picks at the food before giving more than half to Roland. Neither decides to push the matter any further tonight but they share a knowing look between them. 

Roland sits excitedly chatting away to Regina through the meal, she makes all the appropriate responses but Henry and Robin can tell something’s off, like she’s acting her way through. Roland lets out a large yawn and Robin takes it as his cue to interrupt. 

“Looks like it’s somebody’s bed time.” He tells his son, leaning over and picking him up off the bed.

“But I wanna stay with mama.” Roland whines.

Suddenly there’s a wail from downstairs, baby Neal expressing his displeasure with something. 

Regina freezes, dropping the plate she was holding down onto the tray Robin had placed in front of her with a loud clatter. Roland jumps. Robin and Henry exchange looks and without words, Robin places Roland on the ground and Henry grabs the little boys’ hand. 

“Hey buddy, let’s get you ready for bed.” He says. Roland quickly looks between his mama and papa and even at his young age he knows the atmosphere in the room has just changed, he follows Henry unquestioningly. 

The crying stops as quickly as it started, but still Regina is frozen in place. Robin lifts the tray and places it on the floor next to the bed, climbing onto the bed and placing himself in front of Regina. 

“Regina.” He tries and fails to get her attention. “Regina look at me.” He says, firmer this time placing his hands on her upper arms. “It was Neal. You’re home, you’re safe.” He watches her as she seems to come out of whatever trance she’d gone into, she takes two deep, steadying breaths and he sees her rebuilding her walls, putting her armour back on right in front of his eyes. 

“I know.” She says, her voice flat and emotionless. 

Robin looks at her, really looks at her, her face has hardened somehow and he knows that she’s going to try and shut him out, push him away. Again. It’s her go to defence mechanism. 

It’s taking every bit of strength Regina has not to scream. Her mind is racing. The way Robin’s hands are on her arms is bringing up memories of every time her mother’s magic held her in a vice-like grip. She reminds herself that this is Robin, that he would never hurt her. Except he did when he left, with her. The rational part of her mind knows none of this is his fault. But she’s just spent a year in the underworld, having it thrown in her face that while her child is gone, her sister has a child with her soul mate. She has given him what Regina couldn’t. What she couldn't give Leopold. Long buried memories are closer to the surface now, after she’s been forced to revisit them in the underworld. 

It’s all too much for her. Every part of her hurts and she wants nothing more than to reach in to her chest and pull her own heart out to try and stop this agony. But that’s not an option, not right now, Robin wouldn’t let her. Or Mary Margaret. She can’t deal with these feelings though, she’s not strong enough, so she pushes them away. She’d rather feel nothing at all than this. She can bury the feelings within herself, she had enough practice as Leopold’s wife. It’s easier to feel nothing at all.

“I’m fine.” Regina tells Robin with the same tight smile she’d given Henry earlier. “I should go check Roland’s ready for bed.” She tells him, shrugging his hands off and making a move to get up.

Robin frowns, this isn’t quite what he was expecting. “Regina?” He asks, holding on to one arm to stop her standing.

“Yes?” She turns to face him.

“I realize this is a ridiculous question but, are you alright?” He asks.

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?” She replies, standing up and leaving the room as she does so. Robin can see it then, it’s like a light inside her has gone out. She’s here, but she’s not. He’s never seen her like this, not even in the enchanted forest when she thought she’d lost Henry forever. 

Regina goes straight to Roland’s room and finds Henry sitting on the edge of Roland’s bed, talking quietly to him. Henry looks up when Regina enters the room, smiling.

“See, Mom came to say goodnight.” Henry tells Roland, ruffling the boys’ hair affectionately. 

“Of course I did.” Regina smiles, it’s that same smile, dead behind the eyes, it’s enough to fool Roland but not Henry. 

Henry eyes his mother suspiciously as he exits the room, leaving her alone with the littlest merry man. 

“Mama?” Roland asks hesitantly and Regina takes Henry’s place, sitting on the edge of Henry’s bed.

“Yes baby?” Regina answers, brushing his curly mop of hair out of his face.

“I missed you.” He tells her, sitting up in bed and throwing his arms around her neck and climbing onto her lap. 

Regina throws her arms around the boy, continuing to fight back the emotions inside her. She rubbed the boys back soothingly. “I missed you too Roland.” She tells him, and it’s the truth, the only thing that kept her sane in the underworld was thinking of Henry, Roland and Robin. She almost laughs at herself as she thinks that, sane, is that what she is?

Robin watches from the doorway as Regina silently rocks with the boy in her arms, he’s content there and she seems at peace holding him. Robin turns away from the scene, going downstairs. Roland eventually drifts off to sleep and Regina gently lowers him down onto his bed, tucking him in.

Robin goes into the kitchen finding Mary Margaret and Emma there with Henry.

“Where’s David?” He asks.

“He took Neal home, we didn’t think a crying baby in the house was a great idea.” Mary Margaret answers.

Robin can’t help but think that things might have been slightly better had they thought of that earlier, but he doesn’t voice it. 

“Everything ok?” Emma asks.

Robin sighs, again, he seems to be doing a lot of that lately. “Honestly? I have no idea.” 

“She’s not acting normally…” Henry says. “I mean, she is, but not exactly.” He hesitates as he tries to clarify what he means, he’s not even sure.

“Can we really expect her to act normally after everything she’s been through?” Mary Margaret asks.

Robin runs a hand through his hair. “No, I expect not.” He agrees and then pauses, thinking how to phrase his next thought. “I don’t know how to help her, she’s shutting me out…she’s never done that before, not really, not like this, this seems different." 

Mary Margaret could almost laugh. “Don’t look at me, all Regina’s ever done is shut me out.” 

Emma gives him a look that clearly conveys the thought ‘Me too’. 

It briefly occurs to him that perhaps he shouldn’t be saying such things in front of Henry, but the boy is no fool, they had both seen the same thing in her. 

“What was it like?” Henry asks suddenly.

“What?” Emma asks him. 

“Where she was, the underworld?” Henry clarifies. 

The adults in the room all look at one another. 

“It…was not a great place to be.” Emma answers, deliberately evasive. 

Henry throws her a look. 

“Look, I think we could all do with some rest.” Mary Margaret tries to diffuse the situation. “Why don’t we head home and you can call us if you need anything.” 

Robin nods his head in agreement. 

“Kid?” Emma addresses Henry, asking if he’s coming home with them.

“I’m staying here.” He tells her. 

“Ok, just call me if you need anything.” She says, kissing his forehead on her way out.

Mary Margaret gives Henry a quick hug and then awkwardly does the same with Robin before both she and Emma leave the house. 

“I guess I’ll head up to bed then.” Henry says to Robin, his tone bordering on dejected. 

“Henry, your mother, she is strong, stronger than even she knows I think. She will get through this.” Robin tells the boy, and he tries to force any doubt from his voice.

Henry eyes him for a minute, as if he’s trying to decide if he believes that or not. “I just wonder how much one person can take sometimes…” He says sadly before turning and going upstairs to his bedroom. He passes Roland’s room on the way, sees him tucked in a sleeping soundly. He steals a glance at the door to his mom’s room but it’s closed. With a sigh and a heavy heart he goes to his own bedroom. 

Robin busies himself downstairs in the kitchen, tidying up what little mess had been made by their guests. He spends far more time than necessary cleaning and tidying, trying to keep his hands and his mind occupied. He’s not sure how much time has passed when he finally resolves to go upstairs. 

He silently enters the bedroom, utilising his skillset from his former life, and makes his way across the room in darkness. With the little light coming in from the moonlight through the window, he can see the outline of Regina in the bed. She’s laying on her back, her head turned slightly towards the window, eyes closed. Her breathing is slow and regular, but he can tell she’s only feigning sleep. For one thing he’s never known her to sleep on her back, instead she’s always curled up on a side. 

He won’t push things tonight, if this is how she wants things to be, then he’ll allow it, for now. He strips down to his boxer shorts and climbs into the bed beside her. Though there’s only a short distance between them it may as well be miles as far as he’s concerned. His mind races, and sleep won’t come. He forces himself to slow his breathing, he can feign sleep as well as she can, and he hopes there’s a chance she’ll drift off if she thinks he’s asleep. 

He’s not sure how much time has passed, but it’s obviously been enough that Regina believes he’s asleep. She silently rolls over onto her side, facing away from him. For a moment he’s relieved and thinks that his plan has worked, she’s going to sleep but then he hears it, the change in her breathing and he can feel the bed moving. She’s crying, fighting to stay silent as she does so. 

Every fibre of his being aches to reach out and touch her, to try and comfort her, but he instinctively knows she’ll reject that. She’ll be angry if she even realises he’s awake. So he lies still, focusing on keeping his breathing slow, on not reacting to the fact that the woman he loves is falling apart inches away from him and she won’t allow him to comfort her. He must have eventually fallen asleep, he doesn’t remember it, but the exhaustion must have finally overcome him. The next thing he’s aware of is whimpering. 

It takes him a moment to come around properly, to realize what's happening. The noise is coming from Regina, who’s starting to thrash around on the bed, and there are words along with the whimpering. Cries of “No.”, desperate pleas of “Please don’t.” and he hears the former King’s name more than once. He frowns when he hears the word baby as well. Wonders whether her tormented mind has thrown traumatic memories together or whether she had lost even more during her marriage to the King that she had ever admitted to him. Regina has spoken very little of her former marriage to King Leopold, but even what little has said has been enough to anger Robin. He remembers well enough the kingdom’s shock when Leopold chose a bride barely older than his own daughter, and the thought of a young girl forced to marry a man old enough to be her father does not sit well with him. But, like so many things in her life, Regina had refused to speak of it. 

Regina’s cries grow more desperate and her thrashing more violent and he cannot allow this go on any longer. It’s not the first nightmare he’s seen her have, but it certainly seems to be one of the worst. 

He places a hand on her shoulder, gives her a gentle shake. “Regina.” 

It’s not enough, and really, he knew it wouldn’t be.

He kneels on the bed now, leans over her, a hand on each shoulder and gives a much firmer shake, is louder when he calls her name. 

Her eyes open, wide with panic and she gasps to catch her breath. It takes a few seconds for her to realize where she is, who she’s with and as soon as she does, she’s shrugging her arms out of his grip. As quickly as she possibly can she brings her expression back to indifference and Robin can see right before his eyes how she’s able to put a mask on. 

“Regina?” He’s backed away, isn’t leaning over her anymore but his expression if full of concern.

“I’m fine.” She answers. “Go back to sleep.” Her tone isn’t cold, but there’s none of the usual warmth there. Indifferent is the only word he can think of. 

“Regina please…” He feels like he’s literally being torn apart inside. 

She huffs out a breath, annoyed at his persistence then throws back the covers and stalks out of the room. And though every part of Robin screams at him to follow, he doesn’t. 'She’s not ready' he repeats to himself like a mantra.


	16. Chapter 16

Roland is the first to wake, Henry is still dead to the world and his father is in a fitful sleep after hours of lying awake worrying about Regina. Roland’s stomach won’t allow him to lay in bed any longer, grumbling loudly, and so the young boy sets off downstairs in search of sustenance. He pads down the stairs in his bare feet and pyjamas, intending to head towards the kitchen but he sees Regina sitting on the sofa in the living room and changes course towards her. 

She’s staring off into space and doesn’t notice him until he speaks. She’s been sat this way for hours, fighting sleep, she doesn’t want to sleep, the nightmares come then, the memories. 

“Mama.” He says, standing in front of her and touching her knee. 

She’s startled and she can’t help but flinch at the touch but she forces a smile onto face. 

“Good morning sweetheart.” She greets him, trying to force warmth into her voice. “Are you hungry?” She asks, assuming that’s what brought the boy downstairs so early.

He nods vigorously. 

“Ok, well let’s see about us getting you some breakfast.” She says, taking his hand and leading him to the kitchen. She sits him up on one of the stools and sets about making breakfast for the whole house, pancakes, bacon, eggs. The smell must have wafted upstairs, it’s not long before Henry and Robin appear, exchanging looks at finding this seemingly perfectly normal domestic scene.

Regina plates up the breakfast, onto only three plates, none for herself. Robin and Henry exchange worried looks about this too but neither raises the point. Even little Roland seems to know better than to bring it up. Regina kisses the top of Roland’s head and then Henry’s cheek before she moves to leave the kitchen. 

“Where are you going?” Robin asks. 

“To set up the nursery of course.” She answers, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. 

More worried glances between Henry and Robin, and they haven’t gone unnoticed by Regina.

“You do have a new baby son do you not?” Regina continues in the tone that implies Robin’s being a moron. 

“Well, yes, but we haven’t even really discussed…” Robin stammers over his words.

“What’s to discuss? He’s your son, he’ll be living with you and he’ll need a nursery.” She says, turning on her heel and going back upstairs. 

“Uh, what exactly happened last night?” Henry asks as soon as he’s sure his mother’s out of earshot.

“That’s what I’d like to know.” Robin answers, perplexed by Regina’s behaviour. With everything that had happened, he’d barely had a chance to discuss the child he shared with Zelena with Regina and while he always envisioned his son coming to live with them, he wasn’t sure it happening quite so soon was going to necessarily be a good thing. 

By the time they’d finished eating and cleaned up, Robin and the boys found Regina upstairs in a fully formed nursey. Clearly she’d been busy with her magic while they ate. Robin had to admit, the room was beautiful, white walls, white furniture with baby blue accents in the soft furnishings. A crib, a little closet, a changing table and a rocking chair, along with an assortment of stuffed animals and toys. A mobile hung above the crib with little arrows. Regina had paid her usual attention to detail. The boys had looked in, Roland letting out some excited noises before Henry had ushered him out for them both to get ready.

“It’s perfect my love.” Robin told Regina when they were alone, she was standing in the middle of the room. He saw a flash of sadness in her eyes before the indifference was there.

“I’m glad you like it.” She smiled, that false smile she’d been giving them since last night. “You should get ready and go pick him up, you must miss him.” 

“Regina, we need to talk about this.” Robin countered. 

“I told you, there’s nothing to talk about.” Her tone has a cold edge to it. 

He sighs, clearly she’s not going to relent easily. He’s not sure what he’s supposed to do, what can he do? He leaves Regina standing in the nursery and gets showered and ready for the day ahead. When he’s dressed and ready to leave, as are Roland and Henry, he find Regina still standing in the exact same spot her left her in the nursery. 

“Are you coming my love?” He asks from the doorway. 

She shakes her head. “I have a few things I need to get done around the house.”

“If you’re sure…” He trails off, he definitely isn’t.

“Of course.” She says, flashing that same smile that’s dead behind the eyes. 

 

Robin goes straight to Mary Margaret and David’s loft after he drops the boys off at the park. Henry’s reluctant, he knows Robin’s trying to keep them away from what’s happening, but his instinct to protect Roland is strong so he agrees, for now anyway. Robin knocks on the door to the loft, realizing only after he’s done it that he’s just dropping in unannounced. 

“Hey.” David says once he’s opened the door and seen who it is. “Come in.” 

“Thank you.” Robin enters the apartment to find Mary Margaret and Emma sat at the table, the remains of their breakfast in front of them. 

“Aren’t the boys with you?” Mary Margaret asks. 

“No, they’re at the park. I need to talk to you about Regina and I thought it best they not be here for it.” Robin says somewhat awkwardly. He has questions he needs to ask of Mary Margaret, questions no child should hear about their mother. 

Emma frowns. “Henry knowns about most of the stuff she did as the evil queen, it’s in his storybook.”

“It’s uh, it’s slightly more complicated than that.” Robin fumbles for the right way to phrase what he’s trying to say. “It’s something of a private matter.” 

“Oh. I see.” The penny drops for Emma, he doesn’t want her here either. “Well, I guess I’ll go meet Henry at the park.” She says, standing and grabbing her jacket and heading out the door. 

“Robin, what’s going on?” Mary Margaret asks as Robin takes the seat Emma’s just vacated. 

“Honestly, I don’t know.” He admits. “Last night, I mean, she was different from the moment she woke up, but it was like all of a sudden a switch was flipped and Regina was acting almost normally.”

“What do you mean “almost”?” David asks. 

“I can’t quite explain it. It’s like, it’s false. It’s an affectation. When she smiles, it doesn’t reach her eyes. She shows affection to the boys but it just somehow doesn’t ring true. I don’t know if I can explain what I mean.” Robin’s frustrated he can’t articulate what he’s seen. 

“It’s like she’s dead inside.” Mary Margaret says, staring ahead as memories flash through her mind. 

“Exactly.” Robin agrees. 

There’s a long pause as Mary Margaret struggles with whether or not to say what she’s thinking, eventually she speaks. “What you’re describing, it sounds an awful lot like what Regina was like not long after she married my father. She said all the right things, did all the things she was supposed, but when I look back on it now, I can see it, except for the briefest flashes of emotion, she was dead behind the eyes the whole time, like she was acting her way through every day while she felt nothing inside.” 

David puts his hand over Mary Margaret’s where the rest on the table. “Great, we all know how that worked out.” 

Robin can’t pretend he’s not annoyed by the comment, and the look he gives David says as much, but he also can’t deny there’s no truth to what he’s said. Clearly this method of dealing, or rather not dealing, with her emotions doesn’t work very well for Regina in the long term. 

“So what am I supposed to do? I can’t just leave her like this.” Robin asks, almost pleading.

“I have no idea.” Mary Margaret replies, “I was too young to even realise something was wrong.” She says, then pauses for a second. “I was too self-involved, I guess I didn’t want to see.” 

“There’s no point dragging up ancient history.” David squeezes her hand comfortingly. 

Robin winces, for that’s exactly what he wanted to do. “Uh…actually, I need to ask you about some of that history.” 

Mary Margaret frowned, “What about it?”

Robin sighs, a momentary pause while he thinks about how much Regina would dislike him revealing what he’s about to, but what choice does he have? “Regina’s been having nightmares.” 

“Well after a year in the underworld surely that’s to be expected?” David asks.

“I would imagine so, yes, but it’s the content that concerns me.” Robin explains.

“Content?” Mary Margaret asks, confused as to how he would know.

“She cries out in her sleep.” He explains. “And the thing is, this isn’t a new thing, she’s often been troubled by nightmares and most of them are based on memories.”

“I guess reigning as ‘The Evil Queen’ will do that to you.” David says, but it’s not unsympathetic. 

“Yes, there are often memories of things she did during that time, but it’s not only that.” He pauses again, knowing she really would detest him revealing so much, especially to these two, but he’s gone this far. “Her mother truly was a cruel woman, no child should have to endure what Regina did.” He explains, telling them without saying it. Then another pause, these next words were sure to hurt Mary Margaret. “And then there’s the matter of her marriage.”

Mary Margaret visibly blanches. 

“I’m sorry to bring it up Mary Margaret, but last night, she was crying out in her sleep, begging for your father to stop.” Everyone in the room is deeply uncomfortable now, but Robin pushes on. “And then…she was crying out for her baby, begging for him not to take him.” Another pause, Robin looks down, gathering the strength to continue. “I know that it’s possible her mind has jumbled up everything that happened and pushed all the memories together, but, I need to know…”

Mary Margaret sits in silence, her filling with unshed tears and David tries his best to comfort her, squeezing her hands where they remain gripping onto one another on the table, stroking them with his thumb. Finally, after what feels like an eternity, she breaks the silence. “I didn’t want to believe that was really him.” She whispers. 

David and Robin both frown, unsure of the meaning of her words. “Who?” David asks.

Mary Margaret swallows back the bile that’s rising in her throat as tears start to spill from her eyes. “My father.” She says. “I saw him in the underworld.”


	17. Chapter 17

_The Underworld – The Day of Regina’s rescue._

“I’m real Regina, we’ve come to take you home.”

Mary Margaret stands at the back of the group, looking on as Robin gently tries to convince Regina they’re all real. She’s sure her mouth must be hanging open at the sight of Regina cowering like a frightened animal, she can only imagine what she must have endured. Out of the corner of her eye, a flash of movement catches her attention, and suddenly she’s aware they’re being watched. She quietly heads towards where she saw the movement, careful not to do anything to startle Regina. 

Mary Margaret heads down a corridor, and arrow ready to fire from her taught bow. The house is different to how she remembers, but then so was the palace. Suddenly a door appears in the wall and opens, as if inviting her in. This feels wrong and so very much like some kind of trap but Mary Margaret can’t help herself, something is drawing her to step into the room through this mysterious door. As soon as she does it slams shut behind her, causing her to jump. It’s then she notices a figure silhouetted against the window. There’s something so familiar about it that she relaxes her bow as she tries to process what she’s seeing.

“Daddy?” She gasps.

Leopold turns smiling to greet his daughter. “Snow, my beautiful girl.” 

Mary Margaret grins, delighted to see her father again, but the smile quickly fades. “No, you’re not really here.”

“Oh but I am.” Leopold argues.

“Rumpelstiltskin said that the people here were here only to torment Regina.” Mary Margaret doesn’t want to believe that of her father. 

“Exactly, this place is about unfinished business and she and I certainly have that.” Leopold answer with an almost maniacal grin. 

“You want revenge for her killing you.” Mary Margaret says in a resigned tone, she may not like it but she can understand it. 

Leopold steps closer. “Not just for that! For everything she put me through in our marriage!” He says, disgust evident in his voice as he says the word ‘marriage’. 

“I don’t understand.” Mary Margaret unconsciously takes a step back, this is not the man she knew. 

“You’re old enough now that you don’t need to be shielded from the truth. That woman was unfit to be queen, she was incapable of providing me a male heir for a start, a live one at any rate.” Leopold explains, his disdain becoming more apparent with every word. “Her only use was to keep you happy and clearly she failed miserably at that too. I only regret I didn’t arrange an accident to befall her sooner, she managed to get to me first. Still, I’ve derived a great deal of satisfaction from tormenting that witch here.” 

Mary Margaret is horrified by the words spilling from her father’s mouth, by the truths pouring out that she’d been unable to see before. She can’t believe it, she won’t. “No, you’re not my father, he wouldn’t be so cruel.” 

“This isn’t cruelty my dear.” He laughs. “This is justice.” He takes a step toward Mary Margaret, reaching out touch her. “I’ve missed you Snow.” 

Mary Margaret recoils from his touch. 

“Snow my dear, what’s wrong?” Leopold asks, bewildered. 

“Everything’s wrong! If you’re really here, then you’re not the man I thought you were.” Mary Margaret’s appalled at the possibility that this is really her father.

“Don’t be ridiculous, I’m the same as I always was." Leopold replies, his tone indicating he finds the suggestion preposterous. 

Mary Margaret looks at him, eyes wide with horror. “I’m beginning to think you’re right…” 

“I don’t understand.” Leopold is genuinely dumbfounded by her behaviour. 

“That’s the problem.” Mary Margaret tells him, beginning to get angry.

Leopold looks at her for a moment, his eyes growing cold as he tires of the conversation. “Enough of this! Regina’s been left alone for long enough, you can help me now, together we can make her suffer for all she’s done.”

Mary Margaret’s horror grows. “No! You’re not going anywhere near her again!”

“You’re protecting her?” Leopold is aghast. 

“She’s my family.” Mary Margaret stands firm between her father and the door.

“I am your family!” Leopold is enraged. “How dare you choose her over me!” He’s in Mary Margaret’s face now but she stands her ground.

“I will not allow you anywhere near Regina.” Her words are barely above a growl, she’s furious now. 

“And just how do you propose to stop me my dear?” Leopold is equally filled with rage.

“I’ll do whatever I have to.” Mary Margaret replies, in one fluid motion taking a step backwards and drawing her bow back, arrow pointed toward her father. 

Leopold is shocked by his daughter’s actions, they stare at each other for what feels like an eternity to Mary Margaret before Leopold finally yields, he huffs and turns away, walking towards the wall opposite the door, as he gets nearer another door appears. He turns to Mary Margaret as he stands at the threshold of the open door. “This isn’t over!” He vows as he steps through and the door disappears. 

Mary Margaret stands with her bow aimed at the wall her father has just disappeared through for a long while after he’s gone. Eventually she lets her arm drop, and stands there shaken to the core by what’s just happened. 

“Mary Margaret!” David bursts through the door to the room Mary Margaret entered through and as soon as he sees her he runs towards her. “Are you alright? What happened? You disappeared.” He asks, holding her by her upper arms, gently shaking her as she stands in a daze. 

She takes a moment to come around from being lost in her thoughts. “I’m fine.” She tells David with a smile. “I just…thought I heard something.” 

“Are you sure you’re alright?” He asks, frowning, he knows his wife and clearly she is not ok.

“I’m fine.” She replies. “Let’s get back to the others.”


	18. Chapter 18

_Present Day_

“I knew something happened in that room.” David says with a resigned sigh after Mary Margaret’s finished telling he and Robin about her encounter with her father in the underworld. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want to believe it was really him.” Mary Margaret replies. “That’s not the man I knew. At least, it’s not the man I allowed myself to see.” 

“You were only a child Mary Margaret, you can’t blame yourself, all children want to see the best in their parents.” Robin tries to comfort her. 

“Maybe, but once I was older, I should have been able to see it. Regina was barely more than a child herself when my father married her.” Mary Margaret tells him sadly. 

“As fascinating as all this is.” David interrupts. “How does knowing any of this help now?” He asks.

“It helps because the more I know, the better I can understand what Regina’s going through.” Robin replies. “This morning she set up a nursery and she sent me to collect the baby from Granny’s, insisted on it.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Mary Margaret asks.

“Of course not.” Robin replies, exasperated. “But I don’t know what else to do, he can’t stay with Granny forever, I want my son with me and yet…” He pauses, thinking of how to phrase his thoughts. “Bringing him to the house seems like nothing more than a cruel reminder of what Regina’s lost.” 

Mary Margaret reaches out for Robin’s hand. “It wasn’t just Regina’s loss, she was your baby too.” 

“I’m well aware of that, and I grieve for my daughter, I can’t pretend I don’t think of her when I look at him and if it’s like that for me, I can only imagine what’s going on in Regina’s head. None of that is his fault though, nor can he help who his mother is.” Robin is at a loss what to do for the best.

“Maybe you should go along with what she’s asking.” David says.

Mary Margaret and Robin look at him questioningly.

“I mean it. Maybe this is her way of working through things.” David continues. 

“What do you mean?” Robin asks. 

“It seems like Regina’s working hard to convince you everything’s fine, maybe this is her way of working through things, maybe this is what she needs right now.” David explains what he’s thinking.

“I suppose it’s possible.” Robin sounds sceptical.

“At the very least it means you get to have your son close.” Mary Margaret says with a smile. 

 

After thanking David and Mary Margaret for their help, Robin decides to take their advice and go along with Regina’s wishes, he goes to Granny’s and picks up his son and takes him home. Granny kindly agrees to follow on shortly after with the supplies that had been gathered for the infant.

He finds the house quiet when he enters through the front door, a quick search of the ground floor finds it empty so Robin heads upstairs with his son cradled in his arms. Robin was more than a little concerned to find Regina sitting cross legged on the floor in the centre of the nursery staring off into space. He couldn’t be sure but it didn’t look like she’d left this room since he went out, hours ago. 

“Regina.” He calls softly to her from the doorway. 

Regina jumps, caught completely unaware there was anyone in the house. She turns to look at him and stands when she sees him with the baby in his arms. She stares at the baby, her expression is unreadable, even to Robin. He takes a step forward and she takes one back, deliberately keeping her distance from him. 

“Regina, I’d like you to meet my son.” Robin says, watching her closely, trying desperately to gauge her reaction. 

Regina continues to stare at the child for a moment, before finally breaking her silence. “He’s beautiful.” She says with a sad smile. 

“He is.” Robin agrees. “Would you like to hold him?” Robin asks.

Regina shakes her head, moving even further away from him. 

Robin tries desperately to remain positive. “You’ve truly done a wonderful job with this nursery.” 

Regina just smiles tightly in response, her eyes still focused on the youngest Locksley’s face.

Robin takes another step into the room, towards the crib and Regina’s practically against the wall trying to keep distance between them, as Robin steps further into the room she edges towards the door. 

“Regina…” Robin is anxious not to push her, but his concern is evident in his voice. 

“I’m going to start making dinner.” The excuse sounds feeble even to Regina’s ears as she backs out of the door and hurries downstairs. 

Robin stands cradling his son looking after her, worry etched in his face. He looks down at his son, “Well son, this is your new home.” The baby gurgles as if he knows he’s being spoken to and Robin smiles, as bad as things are, he can never regret this boys existence. He gently lays the boy down in his crib and the baby gurgles contentedly as he stares up at the mobile Regina’s placed above it. Robin allows himself to forget everything else as he stares down at his son, he can’t help but be happy to have this boy in his life. He tucks the boy in under the fluffy blanket Regina has placed in the crib and stays there, watching over him until he falls asleep. Once he’s sure the baby is asleep, he sighs and heads out of the room, back to the real world to face the problems that go with it. 

 

Robin heads downstairs and finds Regina, true to her word, in the kitchen preparing a lasagne for dinner. 

“He’s asleep.” Robin tells her with a smile. 

Regina smiles back, but as he’s come to expect, it doesn’t reach her eyes. “That’s good.” She says just as she bends to put the lasagne in the oven. “Have you come up with a name yet?” She asks. 

“Sorry?” Robin asks, he’d been lost in thought watching her. 

“A name, for your son. We can’t keep referring to him as ‘the baby’ or ‘him’” She says, and for a moment she sounds like her old self, with a cutting edge to her tone. 

“No, not yet.” Robin replies, truth be told he hasn’t really thought about it. “Do you have any thoughts?” He asks hopefully.

“Shouldn’t you be asking Zelena?” She answers, and she doesn’t mean it cruelly, he can tell, but it still stings.

“I don’t see why.” Robin replies, his tone more angry than he’d intended.

“Despite everything, she is his mother.” Regina states in a resigned, detached tone. 

Robin scoffs.

“I know how difficult it is for you to deal with her, believe me, but you’re going to have to find a way. You’ll need to figure out how you’re going to go about her visiting.” Regina tells him.

The matter of fact tone of her voice, as well as what she’s saying increases the anger he’s feeling. “Visiting? What are you talking about?” He demands.

Regina shrinks back at his angry outburst. “You have to let her see him.” She says quietly looking down and refusing to meet his eye. 

“Why?” He asks, confused by her attitude. “You don’t like her any more than I do, what possible reason would there be to include her in that boys life?” He can see how his angry outburst is affecting her, but he can’t bring himself to calm down. 

“No mother should be forced to live without their child, it’s cruel.” She says, her voice barely above a whisper, she still won’t look up. 

Robin sighs, his anger dissipating immediately. “Regina.” His voice is full of anguish as he calls to her, he reaches out desperately wanting to pull her into an embrace but the moment his hand touches her upper arm she pulls away. 

Regina brushes past Robin as she rushes out of the kitchen, leaving him standing alone in the kitchen.


	19. Chapter 19

Robin groans as he stirs in bed, an insistent tugging at his arm bringing him back to consciousness. 

“Robin!” Comes the loud whisper of his name from Regina. “Robin wake up, the baby’s crying.”

Robin grunts something that vaguely resembles an affirmative response. He is beyond tired. It had been almost two weeks since he’d brought his boy home and he felt like he had hardly slept a wink since. He had been watching with concern as Regina did everything she possibly could to avoid contact with the child, to his knowledge she had yet to even hold him. So when it came to midnight feedings, or any feeding for that matter, he was very much on his own. Oh, she would wake him as she had just done, but she  
wouldn’t go and see to the child herself. Robin sighs, heaving himself out of bed and heading down the hall to attend to the child. 

“Hey little man.” He says as he picks the baby up. “What’s all this noise about?”

The baby starts to settle in his arms and he smiles. 

“Ah, you just wanted some attention did you?” Robin says with a smile, he settles into the rocking chair Regina had placed next to the window in the room, gently rocking back and forth with his son in his arms. The baby starts squirming so he keeps talking, finding the child staring at him as if enraptured whenever he speaks. 

“You’re going to have more attention than you know what to do with growing up in this town my boy. Oh it’s all very complicated I’ll admit, but you have so many people around you who love already and would do anything to protect you. You’ve spent a lot of time with Granny, you’re named for her you know Lucas, that and I really liked the name, but don’t tell Granny that last part.” He whispers conspiratorially. “I swear I saw a tear or two in the old wolf’s eyes when I told her what you were to be named.” And it’s true, she was practically beaming with pride when Robin had told her, she’d grown very attached to the boy. 

“Of course there’s your Aunt Emma and Uncle Killian, you’ve not spent much time with them yet, but when you’re a bit older I suspect you and your uncle Killian will be out on the water with him trying to lead you astray. He’s a pirate you know, but you mustn’t judge people on titles such as that. Daddy’s technically a thief, but that’s a story for another day.”  
He says, playfully bopping his finger on the infants’ nose. 

“Aunt Mary Margaret and Uncle David too, and little Neal, I hope the two of you grow up to be friends.” Lucas stared up at his father, gurgling happily as he spoke. “I suppose if I ever find the right time to ask for Regina’s hand in marriage, Mary Margaret becomes your step-sister which would make Neal and Emma your niece and nephew.” Robin said in slightly bemused tone as he worked it all as he spoke, family was a complicated thing in Storybrooke. 

“You have more uncles than I can count in my Merry Men, each one of them would die for you my boy. When you’re old enough, they’ll teach you everything there is to know about the forest, you’ll make a fine merry man.” He says with a smile, looking forward to a future with his sons by his side.

“Then there’s your brothers, Roland and Henry. They dote on you already.” It was the truth, they were both besotted with the child, Roland more openly of course. Henry being a teenager was trying to be more restrained about it. Robin could tell Henry was feeling awkward being openly affectionate of the child around his mother too, and it was painful for him to watch. 

“You had a little sister too, she would have been beautiful. I’m sure the two of you would have gotten up to no end of mischief together.” Tears start running down Robin’s face as he talks. “Thick as thieves you two would have been, but you’d always be there, looking out for her and taking care of her. It wouldn’t matter to you that there was only months between you, you’re her big brother and it’s your job to take care of her and Roland would do the same for both of you.” It’s the first time Robin’s spoken aloud the vision of the future he’d had for his children. “Henry would be off at college, but he’d always come home if you needed him. And lord help any boys who ever tried to date her, between her three brothers, her army of uncles and me, not to mention a mother who’s handy with a spot of magic.” He smiles as he talks, finding comfort in voicing his thoughts, even if it was to someone who couldn’t understand. “And heaven help anyone that tries to date you or your brothers, your mother and your sister would be there, questioning them on everything.” He smiles sadly at the thought of the future that will never be. 

“The situation with your mother is a complicated. I’m absolutely sure that she loves you a great deal, but she’s too upset about your little sister right now.” Robin’s voice is lower now, Lucas starting to drift off to sleep again but Robin’s talking more for his own benefit now anyway. He knows that Zelena is the child’s mother, but he can’t bear to think of anyone but Regina as the mother of his child. Right now, it seems almost impossible to him that things might work out that way however. As well as refusing to hold or interact with Lucas, Regina’s also managed to avoid any discussion that delves any deeper than day to day minutia. Robin’s frustrated beyond words, but he also doesn’t feel that it’s fair to try and force his son onto a woman still grieving her child. Their child. 

Sometimes he longs for the simplicity of his life in the forest, when it was just him and Roland and the Merry Men. But then he looks down at his sleeping son in his arms and, despite everything, he can’t regret being here, he only wishes he had his daughter too. 

He sighs deeply, as he stands and places Lucas back in crib, gently placing the blanket of him. He watches over him a moment or two before heading back to his and Regina’s bedroom, though it’s a thought he doesn’t relish much these days. They may be sharing the same bed but they might as well be in different realms Regina is so closed off to him, to everyone.

He opens the bedroom and pauses when he finds the bed empty. He frowns as he sees that the bathroom door is open and the light is off, Regina’s not in there, and he’s sure he would have heard her going downstairs. His eyes quickly scan the room and he lets out a groan when he sees it. Damn it, he forgot about the bloody listening device in the baby’s room. Regina had heard every word he’d just said. And now she was gone.


	20. Chapter 20

“Henry.” Robin is gently shaking the boy awake. “Henry wake up.”

Henry groggily rubs at his eyes, coming too slowly. “Robin? What’s wrong?”

“It’s your mother.” Robin tells him with a heavy sigh.

Henry immediately sits upright. “What’s happened?” 

Robin sits down on the edge of Henry’s bed heavily, feeling weighed down by guilt. “I’m afraid I’m to blame.” He says, a pained expression on his face.

Henry, fully awake now, lays a hand on Robin’s upper arm. “Tell me what happened.”

“Lucas was crying and I went to see to him and I forgot about the listening device in the room Henry, I’m not used to such technology.” Robin says, and he doesn’t mean it as an excuse, just an explanation. 

Henry frowns, confused for a second until he realises. “The baby monitor?” Realisation dawns. “What did you say?” 

“I was just talking to Lucas, the way you do with babies, and I started talking about how lucky he was to have all the family he does.” He pauses, looking down. “And then I talked to him about his little sister. Your mother, she must have heard everything said, when I went back to our room, she was gone. I’ve checked the house Henry and she’s not here, I need to go and look for her.” 

“I’ll go.” Henry tells him, resolute in his decision. 

“But, this is my mistake.” Robin begins to protest.

Henry interrupts him. “It’s not a mistake for you to talk about her.” He tells Robin with a kind smile. “Let me go after her, you should try and get some sleep.” 

“I can’t let you roam around the town in the middle of the night.” Robin counters.

“It’s that or leaving me here with a baby and six year old.” Henry says with a shrug. 

“Fair point.” Robin concedes.

“I’m doing this.” Henry says, standing up and pulling clothes out from his closet to get ready. 

“Alright, but you take your cell phone and you call me the second you know anything.” Robin tells him.

 

Henry headed straight for his mom’s vault, that being his first guess as to where she would go however he found it deserted. He called Robin and told him, then continued on to her office, his second guess. 

Henry’s frustrated to find the office empty too, he calls Robin.

“She’s not here either.” He tells her.

“Where else would she be?” Robin asks. 

“I’m not sure.” Henry admits. “I have a few ideas though.” He says, walking around the room as they talk, he finds himself at the window looking out at the garden and his mom’s apple tree. It’s then that he sees her, sitting on the bench facing the tree. “Wait, I see her, I’ll call you back.” Henry says quickly hanging up and running downstairs towards the garden. 

He finds Regina still sitting on the bench, in her pyjamas, staring at the apple tree. 

“Mom!” He cries out. Concern almost overwhelming him, it’s a cold night and she’s been out here at least two hours by now. “Mom!” He cries out again as he sits down next to her, he takes her hand in his. “Mom you’re freezing!” He says, quickly taking his jacket off and draping it over her shoulders. 

Regina’s staring at the tree, almost trance-like. 

“Mom please, talk to me.” Henry pleads.

Regina blinks slowly, turning her head to look at Henry. “Henry.” She says with a glazed smile.

“Mom, Robin told me what happened.” Henry says, putting his arm around her shoulders and gently rubbing her arm, trying to infuse some warmth into her. 

She doesn’t answer. 

“Mom? Talk to me.” Henry’s getting even more worried now. 

“Henry.” Regina seems to come to a little. “It’s cold out here.” She says, taking his jacket off her shoulders and handing it back to him. 

“I’m not the one out in my pyjamas.” He counters, putting the jacket back around her. “Why don’t we go inside, or better yet, go home.” 

“I like it here.” She tells him. 

“Is this where you used to go? In the enchanted forest?” He asks. 

She turns her head, looking at him oddly, he’s hardly ever asked her about the enchanted forest. “Why do you ask?”

“I’ve seen it in the book.” Henry admits. 

She smiles sadly. “There’s a lot that’s not in that book.”

Henry pauses, unsure if he should push her. “Like your first baby.” He finally decides to broach the subject.

Regina’s so shocked she can’t even speak for a good while. “How do you know about that?” She finally asks. 

“I’ve known for a while.” Henry admits. “Things you’ve said and done over the years…” He’d suspected for a while, but recent events all but confirmed it to him.

“You never said anything.” She says, eyes filling with tears.

“You don’t talk about your life before.” He answers.

“I don’t like to think about it.” Regina admits quietly. 

“I know.” Henry takes her hand in his. “But you can’t just pretend it never happened anymore.” He squeezes her hand. “And you can’t pretend she never happened.” 

“Henry.” She says his name with a cautionary tone. 

“Mom, I know you don’t want to talk about this, especially not to me, but you’re going to have to deal with this eventually.” He tells her, full of conviction. He pauses before continuing, sadness in his voice now. “I know you’ve been through a lot, but I miss my mom, so does Roland.” 

Regina hooks her fingers under his chin, lifting his head. “I’m right here.” 

“You aren’t though, even Roland can tell. I don’t know what happened to you in the underworld, but you’re not the same, maybe you never will be and I guess that’s ok…” He stops himself going off on a tangent, no one will tell him much about the underworld but he can imagine what spending a year there might have been like. “The thing is mom, my little sister existed and I don’t want to be afraid to mention her.” 

Tears are streaming down Regina’s face now. “How did you get to be so smart?” She asks with a sad smile.

“I have a very clever mother.” He tells her with a smile. “Can we please go inside now before you freeze to death?”

Regina pulls him into a tight embrace and as she holds him, she uses her magic to take them home, straight into Henry’s room. 

Henry slowly pulls away from her embrace. “I should let Robin know we’re back.” He says. 

She looks down. “Ok.”

Henry leaves the room and quickly finds Robin, after a brief and heated discussion, Henry persuades Robin to wait until Regina comes to him, Robin reluctantly agrees. 

Henry returns to his room to find his mom asleep in his bed, he briefly considers waking her, but then decides better of it and climbs into the bed with her. They haven’t done this since he was little, not since he got the book. As he lays down, she pulls him against her, cuddling him close. She still feels cold to the touch. 

“I love you.” Regina mumbles sleepily. 

“I love you too mom.” He replies.


	21. Chapter 21

When Henry wakes the next morning it’s to find himself alone in his bed. He quickly showers and dresses then goes downstairs. Robin greets him in the dining room where he’s feeding Lucas and Roland is eating cereal with gusto. 

“Where’s mom?” He asks.

Robin looks at him with alarm. “Isn’t she with you?” 

Henry shakes his head. “When I woke up she was gone.”

Robin stands up, ruffling Roland’s hair. “I’ll be back shortly.” He tells him as he moves towards Henry with Lucas still in his arms, he leads Henry through to the kitchen. “What exactly happened last night?”

“I told you, I found her outside her office and after we talked we came home.” Henry explains.

“What did you talk about?” Robin asks, his frustration growing. 

“A lot of things.” Henry things says with a shrug.

“Henry.” Robin’s almost pleading now. 

“I told her Roland and I missed her.” He looks away. “And we talked about the baby.”

“What did she say?” Robin asks, genuinely curious, if Henry managed to get his mother to talk it would be a start.

“Not much.” Henry admits. “She seemed…ok though, a little more like her old self.” 

“Henry, you know your mother’s been through a lot.” Robin cautions.

“I know that, but she’s the strongest person I know.” Henry argues.

Robin smiles. “Well, I can’t disagree with you there, I just worry about pushing her.”

“I know, me too.” Henry agrees. 

“You too what?” Regina enters the kitchen, laden with grocery bags which she places on the counter. 

“Regina! Where have you been?” Robin moves towards her, kissing her cheek. Both he and Henry can see her struggle not to shrink away from him. Robin frowns, but then realises it’s because he’s still holding Lucas. 

Regina steps back from Robin and hugs Henry. “I went to pick up some groceries, I wanted to make us a proper breakfast.” She tells them both while a smile. 

A concerned look passes between Henry and Robin, this is a sudden and quite dramatic change in Regina’s behaviour. “Roland’s eating right now.” Henry tells her. Just as he says that, Roland appears in the doorway with his empty cereal bowl in his hands. “I would have room for some of mama’s pancakes.” He says cheerfully, moving towards Regina. She smiles and picks him up, placing the bowl in the sink. 

“Then some pancakes is what you’ll have.” She tells the boy, smiling. “But you’ll have to help me make them.” She tells him with mock seriousness.

“Yes mama.” Roland replies seriously as she places him in one of the stools at the counter. 

Robin and Henry watch as Regina prepares a massive breakfast for them all with some “help” from Roland. They’re both concerned, Regina seems cheerful and happy, and not the same fake way she was before, but it’s such a sudden change they cannot help but be suspicious of it. 

Breakfast is uneventful, except for Regina’s almost imperceptible flinch when Lucas began to cry. She still avoided looking at the baby at all costs and both Henry and Robin noticed. 

“Mama?” Roland addresses Regina once he’s cleared his plate. 

“Yes sweetheart?” Regina is still picking at her food, she’s not eaten much. 

“Can you take me to the park today?” He asks with a toothy smile. 

“Of course, that sounds like a wonderful idea.” She replies, returning his smile.

“Why don’t we all go, make a day of it?” Robin suggests.

“Sounds like fun.” Henry adds, trying as hard as he can to muster enthusiasm. 

“It’s settled then.” Robin smiles at his boy. 

They all get ready and almost ready to leave when Robin gets a call from David, he’s needed at the Sheriff’s station, there’s been an incident involving one of his merry men. 

“Everything ok?” Regina asks as he hangs up the phone. 

“No.” Robin sighs. “It would seem Michael has forgotten about the Merry Men’s code.”

Regina raises an eyebrow questioningly. 

“He’s been arrested for stealing from the pharmacy.” Robin tells her. “I have to go and sort this out, those men are still my responsibility.” 

“Of course.” Regina agrees. “I’ll take Roland and Henry to the park and you can meet us there when you’re finished.” She tells him, leaving the room before he has a chance to say anything. 

“Right.” Robin sighs again, watching her go. “I guess I’ll drop Lucas off with Granny.”


	22. Chapter 22

It’s been three weeks since Regina’s late night talk with Henry and while things have been better with Roland and Henry, almost back to normal. He can tell she’s trying with him as well, things are still tense however, Lucas presence seeming to cause a barrier between him. Robin can well understand her reasons for feeling the way she so obviously does about his son, but she refuses to even broach the subject with him, finding excuse after excuse to avoid a conversation.

“Again?” Granny grumbles as Robin enters the diner, carrying Lucas in his car seat. 

“I’m sorry.” Robin grimaces. “I do apologise for the imposition.” He says as he sets the car seat on the counter and sits on a stool. 

“What was her excuse this time?” Granny asks sceptically, leaning on the counter in front of Robin. 

“This is difficult for her.” Robin makes yet another excuse for why Regina refuses to care for the infant. “You know that.”

“It’s hardly been a barrel of laughs for you.” Granny is growing tired of this, she’s watched Regina around Lucas, while she tries to ignore him, she seen the flashes of concern on her face if he’s coughed or cried too long or any number of different things that have happened while the whole family’s been in the diner. She can see through Regina’s façade better than most, she does care about the boy, despite everything. This cannot go on. 

“I’m trying to be understanding, I don’t want to push her.” Robin explains. 

Granny scoffs at this. “I’ve heard you say that too many times now. Enough of this, maybe it’s about time somebody did push her.” Granny tells him, a determined look on her face that alarms Robin somewhat.

“What do you mean?” He asks. 

“Stay here.” She says, standing up from where she’s been leaning and picking up the car seat.

“Where are you going?” Robin asks, following after her out the door of the diner. 

Granny stops on the sidewalk outside the diner, turning to Robin with a serious look on her face. “If you come, you do not interfere, no matter what.” She says, and there’s no question in her tone that this is not a request.

“Alright.” Robin answers nervously, this is a side to the old woman he’s not had to deal with. 

Granny marches along the road towards Regina’s house carrying the car seat.

“What are you doing?” He asks as they round the corner to Mifflin Street, his alarm growing.

Granny turns on him, almost menacingly. “Stay here. I mean it, do not move from right here.” She says quietly, voice full of authority.

Robin can only bring himself to nod in agreement and then watch as Granny turns and continues on up the street, he loses sight of her when she turns up the path to the front door of Regina’s house.

Incessant knocking at the front door disturbs the peace and quiet Regina was enjoying. Henry and Roland were out with David and sleeping over at the loft, meaning Robin was helping out at the Sheriff station while David was busy. 

Regina opens the front door to find and angry looking Granny standing there holding Lucas in his car seat. 

“Finally!” The old wolf growls as she pushes passed Regina into the house. 

“What are you doing?” Regina asks, aghast as Granny places the baby’s carrier on coffee table and steps back. 

“I have a business to run.” Granny tells her. “I have two businesses to run in fact and last time I checked, neither one of them was a day care!” 

“I…Robin said you didn’t mind…” Regina is stunned by the older woman’s outburst.

“I don’t mind.” Granny agrees. “Occasionally. This is the third time this week he’s dropped him off with me and why? What are you doing that you can’t look after him?” She’s feigning the anger, but convincingly so. 

“I…I have work to do.” Regina actually stammers trying to come up with an excuse.

“Uhuh.” Granny’s voice is dripping with scepticism. “Well, tough, he’s your problem now.” Granny says, turning and walking out the door before Regina has a chance to even process what’s just happened.

Regina runs to the front door after Granny, calling after her but the older woman is nowhere in sight when she reaches the door. Regina didn’t think she could move so fast, and she’d be right, Granny has simply taken an alternate route around the side of the house. She doubles back on herself, walking briskly until she reaches Robin, who’s still stood out of sight of the mansion. 

“Here.” Granny says as she reaches him, tossing Regina’s cell phone at him. “I dare say she’ll be wanting that when this is done.” 

Robin is surprised to find the device in his hand. “I don’t understand.”

“Well this isn’t going to work if the first thing she can do is call someone to come take him off her hands.” Granny explains, she’d swiped the device off the table when she’d put Lucas down.

“Won’t she just use the phone in the house?” Robin asks. 

“I dare say she would if someone hadn’t cut the line.” Granny answers with a devious smile.

“I see.” Robin says, in a state of shock at the cunning and guile being shown.

“I know this seems harsh.” Granny says, laying her hand on his arm and suddenly she’s back to the kindly woman he’s always known. “But that girl has never done anything the easy way and this will be no different.”

Robin reluctantly nods in agreement. “What if…what if it doesn’t work?” Robin asks. 

“You and I both know there’s no way she’ll let anything happen to that boy. She’d die before she let any harm come to him.” Granny answers. “Besides, I have wolf hearing remember? I can hear what’s going on in there, and your boy has just woken up.” 

 

Regina stares at the infant, standing about ten feet back from his car seat that sits on her coffee table. He’s sleeping peacefully and though the first thought that pops into her head is that he’s beautiful, she can’t help the feeling of panic rising up within her. She looks frantically for her cell phone, she’ll call Robin and he’ll come home she reasons. Except she can’t find her damn phone. No matter she realises, picking up the home phone, but there’s no dial tone. She pushes multiple buttons, checks all the connections, but nothing. Frustrated she throws the handset at the wall, the resulting noise waking the sleeping infant. 

She feels the panic gripping her chest now. She can’t do this. 

Her first instinct is to use her magic to send him away, but she can’t, not when she’s in this sort of a state, god only knows where he’d end up. Her next thought is to transport herself away, it didn’t matter where she ended up, but that would mean leaving him alone for who knows how long. She couldn’t do that either. 

Regina finds herself backed up against a wall, she hadn’t realised she was going backwards, and before she can stop herself she’s sliding down until she’s sat on the floor with her knees drawn up to her chest. Lucas’s cries are growing louder and more insistent and it’s like she back in the underworld again, being taunted with the cries of her own babies. She holds her hands over her ears but she’s not even sure anymore what’s real and what’s in her own mind. She rocks back and forth, back and forth and she has no idea how long this has been going on for, but she can’t take it anymore. The baby is red faced and screaming now.

Regina stands and stalks towards the coffee table. She pauses again as she stands over the infant in his car seat, her hands shaking. Her face feels wet and she realises she must have been crying. She takes a deep breath and undoes the buckle of the seat, it takes her a few goes because of how much her hands are shaking. Then, before she can talk herself out of it, she has Lucas cradled in her arms. 

He settles almost instantly when she picks him up. 

“There, there little one.” She soothes, sitting down on the sofa behind her. 

She looks down at his now contented little face and she can’t help the tears that come.

“I’m sorry.” She says between heart wrenching sobs. “I’m so sorry.” 

 

Outside, Granny stands listening with Robin eagerly looking at her, waiting for news of what’s happening, he can’t hear what’s going on inside, but he can see Granny’s reaction to what she hearing and it’s not reassuring him. 

“Go.” Granny orders him and he’s off like a shot, practically bursting through the door. 

 

He’s startled to find Regina holding Lucas, it’s the first time he’s seen her do that, he stands frozen in the hallway looking into the living room as Regina rocks back and forth, soothing the baby while she sobs. 

Regina looks up, sensing his presence, and he’s sure he can literally feel his heart breaking in his chest at the desperation in her eyes. 

“Robin, I’m so sorry.” She’s still sobbing. “I’m so sorry.” 

Robin rushes toward her, sitting next to her putting his arm around her, pulling her close. 

“Shhh.” He tries to soothe her, rubbing her back comfortingly. “It’s alright, everything will be alright.” He tells her, his voice soft. 

“How can it be?” She asks, pleadingly. “I let you down.” She says. “I keep letting you down.” 

“You’ve never let me down Regina.” He says, cupping her face in his hand and gently forcing her to look at him. “Don’t ever think that.”

“She died Robin, our baby girl died.” 

Robin uses his thumb to wipe away her tears. “I know.” 

“Every time I look at him, all I can see is that he’s not her.” Regina admits, full of shame. 

“I know.” Robin admits, he can’t deny he’s not had the same thoughts. “I understand…but it’s not his fault.” 

There’s a flash of anger in her eyes, and he knows instantly he’s said the wrong thing. 

“You think I don’t know that?” She says, accusation in her tone, she pulls away from his hand. “That’s the worst thing about this, he’s a perfect little innocent.” She looks down at the baby, now sleeping in her arms despite the emotional turmoil of the woman holding him. “And part of me hates him just because of who his mother is.” She’s horrified to be saying these words aloud, but now that she’s started, she’s not sure she can stop. “And there’s a part of me that’s so, so angry that he’s alive and she’s not.” She looks away from Robin again, too ashamed to look him in the eye, too afraid of his reaction, of seeing the moment he realises who he she is. “I don’t want to be that person any more, I don’t want to be full of anger and resentment, but I’m afraid that’s who I really am.” 

“I don’t believe that.” Robin’s reply is instant. “Not for a second.” He’s resolute. “You’ve proved that already Regina, you could have left Lucas alone and crying but you didn’t, you picked him up and you comforted him because you’re a good person.” He makes her look at him again. “You’re a good mother.” He says with deep conviction. 

“I wanted our little girl so badly Robin, I’m so sorry I couldn’t keep her safe.” She can’t accept what he’s saying, not with the burden of guilt she’s still carrying. 

“Regina look at me.” He’s still cupping her cheek with hand but her eyes have been refusing to meet his, she looks at him, brown eyes meeting blue and this is the closest he’s felt to her in weeks. “I understand how you feel, truly, I wish more than anything that our daughter was here with us with now. I had all sorts of plans laid out for how everything would be, I’ve spent hours picturing what she would have looked like.” He’s almost lost himself off on a tangent, but he catches himself and snaps back to the point he was trying to make. “But she’s not here, and that’s something that both of us are going to have to learn to live with. The thing that I need for you to understand my love is that this is not your fault.”

“But it must be!” Regina can’t be shaken from her conviction that she’s to blame. “There’s something wrong with me, there must be.”

Robin takes a deep breath, he looks down at his son, somehow soundly sleeping through this fraught conversation in Regina's arms. The thought crosses his mind to take him from her and place him back in the car seat, but he realises as soon as he thinks it that that would send the wrong message. “Regina, I know.” He tells her. “About the other baby, with Leopold.” 

Regina’s eyes widen in shock. “How? Did Henry tell you?” She asks. 

“Henry?” Robin frowns, wondering how Henry would even know such a thing. “No, I didn’t even know Henry knew.”

“I don’t understand, who then?” Regina’s frowning, distracted herself what he’s saying by focusing on the question of how he found out. 

“Mary Margaret.” Robin answers. 

“No.” Regina shakes her head. “No. I made sure she never knew.” 

“She met her father in the underworld.” Robin explains. 

Regina looks away again, trying desperately to regain some composure. As she moves Lucas wriggles in her arms and she instinctively soothes him. 

Robin watches in awe, he’s never seen her with a baby, she’s so natural with him.

Regina focuses on Lucas, and Robin doesn’t even think she realises she’s doing it. “Don’t you understand? That proves there’s something wrong me. Maybe I’m being punished for everything I’ve done. It wasn’t enough that I cursed myself to be barren, I had to have hope dangled in front of me and snatched away again.” She’s not crying anymore, and despite the words she’s saying, there’s no bitterness in her tone, she’s just resigned to her fate. “It’s no more than I deserve, I’m just so sorry you got hurt Robin.” 

“Regina, this is not your fault, I won’t rest until you believe me.” He tells her, unyielding in his belief in her. He leans forward and kisses her softly, then gently leans his forehead against hers. They rest like that for a moment until, as if on cue, Lucas starts to cry. 

Regina smiles, there’s still sadness in her eyes, but it’s the most genuine smile he’s seen for some time. “Someone’s hungry.” She says, gently lulling the baby, rocking him in her arm. 

Robin frowns, not sure how she’s jumped to such a quick conclusion, after all there’s any number of reasons babies cry.

“That’s his hungry cry.” Regina tells him with a shrug, she may not have been taking an active role in the infants care up until now, but she’s been living in the same house with him all the same. 

“Do you want me to take him?” Robin asks, and he doesn’t want her to think he doesn’t trust her with him, but he also doesn’t want her to think he expects anything from her.

“I got it, if you can get me a bottle, I’ll feed him.” Regina replies, then looks up at Robin suddenly. “Unless you’d prefer I didn’t.” 

“Regina nothing would make me happier.” Robin answers her truthfully. He wants to say more, he wants to tell her that he would like nothing more than for her to be this boys’ mother, but he knows she’s not ready. He makes up a bottle as quickly as he can in the kitchen and then hands it to Regina as he sits back down next to her, she’s much calmer now, almost back to normal. 

Regina smiles down at him as Lucas hungrily guzzles at the milk. “He’s got a good appetite.” She says to Robin.

“That he does.” Robin agrees with a smile. 

“Robin, I’m sorry.” Regina says, her eyes not leaving the baby.

“Regina…” Robin begins to argue.

“No, let me say this.” She interrupts. “I’m sorry for pushing you away.” 

He smiles. “You’ve been trying to push me away since the day we met and you’ve not managed yet.” 

Regina returns the smile. “I don’t know why you put up with me.” 

“Because I love you.” He answers before he can stop himself. 

Regina looks up, her eyes meeting his. “I love you too.”


	23. Chapter 23

It’s Mary Margaret who brings Henry and Roland back the next day, and they’re all more than a little surprised to find Regina sitting at the dining table feeding Lucas his bottle. 

Regina looks up with a smile when she hears them entering the house. “Did you have a nice time?” She asks Henry and Roland.

Henry looks at his grandmother for a second, sharing a confused look, then back to his mother. “Yeah, it was great.” Henry answers, but any enthusiasm is drowned out by the confusion he feels at the scene before him.

“Grandpa David took us fishing and then he taught us about sword fighting!” Roland excitedly tells her, running up and hugging her, remembering to careful of his baby brother.

“Really?” Regina says in an over exaggerated manner to Roland. “Grandpa David did all that?” She asks, eyebrows raised and looking at Henry and Mary Margaret.

“Roland asked if David could be his Grandpa too.” Henry explains. 

“I see.” Regina says. “Robin’s had to go out to the Merry Men’s camp, some sort of drama involving Little John and squirrel.” Regina explains. “Why don’t you boys go and get cleaned up, remember to put all your dirty clothes in the hamper.” Regina tells them. 

The boys trudge up the stairs as instructed, but not before Henry throws another look at his grandmother conveying that he wants her to find out what’s going on.  
Mary Margaret sits down at the table opposite Regina. 

“I hope you don’t mind the whole Grandpa David thing.” She says nervously. “It’s just, he heard Henry calling us Grandpa and Grandma and he asked if we could be his grandparents too…I didn’t have the heart to say no.” 

“Our family tree is already a pretty messed up affair, what’s one more odd branch?” Regina says with a smile and a shrug before turning her attention back to Lucas who’s finished his milk and begun to fuss. She quickly whips a towel over shoulder and moves him upright, burping him. 

Mary Margaret watches, shocked by the sudden change in her demeanour with the child.

“You’re good with him.” It’s all Mary Margaret can think of to break the silence, but it’s also the truth. 

“And you’re terrible at this.” Regina smirks. “If you must know, the old wolf finally forced my hand.” 

“Granny?” Mary Margaret frowns, not understanding.

“She went as far as to cut my damn phone line so I couldn’t call anyone.” Regina explains.

“I still don’t-” Mary Margaret stops herself mid-sentence as realization dawns. “She forced you to have to deal with him.” 

“That she did.” Regina says with a wry smile.

“And are you ok?” Mary Margaret asks, concerned.

Regina looks up across the table at the younger woman, sometimes she still caught off-guard by the concern she shows for her. “Honestly?” Regina says. “No, I don’t think I am, but I think I’m getting closer to ok.” She admits. 

“And Robin?” Mary Margaret asks.

“We talked.” Regina answers. “A lot.” The conversation had gone on for hours after they’d put Lucas to bed. It’s the first night in a long while she’s not felt like there’s some sort of invisible barrier between then in bed. “He’s still hurting too.” Regina admits.

A silence falls over them, the only noise coming from whatever video game the boys had elected to play upstairs and Regina gently patting Lucas’s back. After a while she moves him back into the cradle of her arms, rocking him gently as he starts to get sleepy. It’s not until the baby’s asleep that Regina finally speaks. 

“He told me.” She says, and she doesn’t elaborate on who told her what, she doesn’t have to. 

“I thought he might.” Mary Margaret says nervously. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Regina asks, and it’s not an accusation but a genuine question. 

“I don’t know.” Mary Margaret admits, and it’s the truth. “I wasn’t sure it was really him, you don’t seem to want to talk about anything that happened there, I didn’t want to upset you."She lists off the reasons. "How did I not know, we lived under the same roof?” 

“I never wanted you to have to know.” Regina says quietly. 

“About…About the baby?” Mary Margaret asks cautiously. 

Regina looks up, trying to keep herself composed even as she can feel her eyes starting to fill with tears. “About your father.” She says, her voice barely more than a whisper. “I used magic to take away your memories.”

“You mean I knew?” Mary Margaret is shocked.

Regina nods, looking down at Lucas, steadfastly refusing to meet Mary Margaret’s eye. 

“I don’t understand, how could I not realize? How much time is missing?” Mary Margaret asks.

“The spell doesn’t work like that, it’s not a whole chunk of time missing, just specific memories.” Regina explains.

“I see. Is there anything else I don’t remember?” Mary Margaret asks pointedly. A beat goes by where Regina doesn’t answer. “You know, I don’t even think I want to know. Regina why would you do this?”

Regina opens her mouth as if she’s about to answer but seems to think better of it. 

“Regina?” Mary Margaret presses.

“You’re father…he didn’t react…well,” She reluctantly answers.

“Why do I get the feeling that’s an understatement?” Mary Margaret asks rhetorically. “I couldn’t see it.” She continues sadly. “I didn’t want to see it.” She admits. “When I was older, I could see you weren’t happy but I never thought you were unhappy enough to throw yourself off a balcony and it never even occurred to me that my father could be the cause.” She’s bewildered now by her own lack of awareness.

“I have told that interfering green-” She starts through gritted teeth but cuts herself off taking a deep breath. “That was an accident.” She states categorically, putting an end to the matter as far as she’s concerned. “As for your father, why would have it occurred to you?” Regina says. “He was a good father to you, he never lost his temper with you, there was no reason for you to think anything else.” She’s sad as she says it, thinking about her own father.

There’s another pause in the conversation, both women lost in thought. Regina stands and announces she’s going to put Lucas down for a nap and Mary Margaret sits and waits until she returns, going over their conversation in her mind. Regina comes back via the kitchen and places two cups of coffee on the table. They then sit in silence sipping their coffee until Mary Margaret can hold back no longer.

“I don’t understand you.” She finally says. “All those years you wanted nothing more than to hurt me and make me suffer and yet you never once tried to use my father against me…” 

“What would have been the point? You wouldn’t have believed anything I’d said.” Regina replies, trying to be flippant but Mary Margaret can see through it.

“It’s something more than that. You obviously could have used magic and shown me, made sure I knew it was true, but you never did, why?” She persists.

“I was on a homicidal rampage, I can’t explain a lot of what I did.” Regina’s reply is terse, making it clear she doesn’t want to talk about this anymore.

“That’s not it.” Mary Margaret isn’t letting this go, a tense silence falls over the room until suddenly a realization dawns. “You were protecting me.” She says, awed. “You did protect me from him.”

Regina scoffs. “You were his golden child, you didn’t need protecting.” 

“No, that’s not true. I didn’t realise at the time, I thought you were trying to come between us but you used to put yourself between him and I, physically I mean, and then get me out of the room.” She’s remembering more and more as she speaks. “How could I have been so stupid not to see what you were doing?”

“Stop.” Regina really does not want to talk about this.

“I don’t understand Regina. You hated me, you wanted me dead and yet you protected me.” Mary Margaret is overwhelmingly confused by this new information. “Thank you.”

“How can you of all people sit there and thank me?” Regina’s horrified. “I killed your father, I spent years hunting you, I cursed you and I’m the reason you were separated from your child for 28 years.”

“I killed your mother and I tried to kill you more than once.” Mary Margaret answers.

“That’s different, you only came after me because I came after you.” Regina argues. “And as for Cora you had your reasons and Rumple had a hand in that.”

“Look Regina, we could sit here and list off our crimes against each other but you and I both know we each had reasons for why we’ve done what we’ve done and I understand yours far better now. As for separating us from Emma, it would have suited you far better if we’d been together. If you want to talk about unspeakable crimes, I took Maleficent’s child away from her. On Purpose.” 

“Stop it.” Regina’s angry. “Stop trying to justify what I did to you!”

“Stop thinking you deserve to suffer.” Mary Margaret is absolutely calm. 

“How can you be so calm?” Regina doesn’t even know why she’s angry. 

““Regina, I know you better than you think, I know what’s going through your head. You didn’t deserve to lose your baby Regina.” This isn’t the conversation Mary Margaret thought she would be having when she’d come here today, but it is a conversation that’s been a long time coming. 

Regina struggles to keep her emotions in check. “Didn’t I?” She asks, eyes filling with tears again which she angrily swipes away. 

Mary Margaret puts her hand over Regina’s. “Regina, you deserve to be happy.” 

Regina pulls her hand away and puts them into her lap, staring down at them as tears silently fall. This isn’t the first time she’s heard these words. “I don’t know that I can be, not after this.”

“You can.” Mary Margaret smiles kindly. “You have Henry and Robin and Roland.” She says. “Not to mention David and Emma and I.” She continues. “And despite everything I can tell you love Lucas too.” 

“I don’t. I can’t.” Regina argues, but weakly. 

“Because you’re afraid he’ll be taken away.” Mary Margaret states, she was telling the truth when she said she knew Regina better than she thinks, she understands how Regina thinks.

“Regina?” Robin calls her name as he shuts the front door behind him.

“In here.” Regina calls out, quickly wiping away any tears left and trying desperately to compose herself but she’s glad of the interruption.  
Robin strides into the dining room smiling, but stops and then slowly approaches when he sees the two woman at the table. He can tell something is going on, something he seems to have interrupted. “Is everything ok?” He asks.

“Everything’s fine.” Regina answers, plastering a false smile on her face. “We were just talking.”

“I see.” Robin says, clearly unconvinced. 

“I better go.” Mary Margaret says standing to leave. “Please think about what I said.” She pleads with Regina, putting a hand on her shoulder. “Robin.” She nods in his direction before leaving.

“Are you going to tell me what that was all about?” Robin asks once he hears the door close. 

“Nothing important.” Regina answers.


	24. Chapter 24

Things have been different since Granny’s intervention a little over a week ago, Regina is hands on with Lucas, helping out with feedings and changings, she’s bathed him and rocked him to sleep and soothed him and it’s wonderful to see, but Robin can tell, something is still holding her back with him. He somehow can’t help but feel hurt every time she refers to Lucas as ‘Robin’s son’ instead of theirs, yet he knows he’s being unreasonable. 

“What’s troubling you my love?” Robin asks from the doorway of the nursery. He’s been standing there a while now watching Regina, she’s sitting in the rocking chair feeding Lucas his bottle, unaware of him watching her. He can see on her face that there are thoughts racing about her mind.

“How long have you been standing there?” Regina asks with a smile. Living with a former thief was maddening at times, how easily he could sneak up on her. 

“Long enough to know there’s something going on inside that beautiful head of yours, don’t change the subject.” He answers, returning her smile and crossing the room to kiss her forehead and gently swipe his finger against his sons’ cheek. 

“It’s nothing.” She says, in a way which he knows means the opposite. “I was just thinking.”

“About?” He asks, leaning against the changing table. She doesn’t answer for a long while and Robin eventually crosses his arms over his chest and sighs. “I’m not going anywhere until you talk to me.” He says.

It’s a role reversal now, Regina’s turn to be reluctant to mention a subject, not wanting to push Robin. 

“Robin…” She reluctantly begins. “I know this is a difficult subject for you.”

Robin can feel his jaw clench as he begins to realize where she’s going with this. “I do not want that woman to have anything to do with my son.” He says, and he’s not angry as such, but he is determined.

“I know.” The truth is, Regina shares his feelings. “Believe me, I understand exactly how you feel, but-”

He cuts her off mid-sentence. “There are no buts Regina.”

“She’s his mother.” Regina says, and while she hates the fact that Robin shares a child with that woman she also remembers what it was like when Henry was taken away from her, not to mention the loss of her babies.

“No.” Robin is angry now. “You’re his mother, you’re the one here looking after him!” It’s out before he realizes what he’s saying.

Regina remains calm, she’s been expecting this sort of a reaction, she can’t blame him either. “Much as either of us might wish that were the case, it’s not.” She tells him sadly. 

“Robin, I’m not suggesting we hand Lucas over to her, I am well aware she cannot be trusted.” 

“What exactly are you suggesting then?” Robin asks, still angry, but not at Regina, never at Regina. It’s the situation that angers him. 

“I don’t know exactly. I just keep thinking that if we don’t at least let her see him…are we really any better than her?” She asks, and she is truly asking. “I just, it keeps going round and round in my mind that it’s unbelievably cruel to keep a mother away from her child.” 'I should know', she thinks to herself, but she won’t say it aloud. 

“She doesn’t deserve to be his mother!” Robin retorts. “It would cruel to inflict her upon him!” 

Regina has to fight to stay calm in the face of his anger, she never thought she’d ever find herself fighting that green bitches corner. “Maybe. Probably.” She agrees. “The same could have been said about me and Henry though. I feel like I’m being a hypocrite if she’s not at least given a chance to change, and I don’t want to force my guilt onto you, but you asked what’s bothering me…” 

Robin sighs, he can understand Regina’s reasoning, much as he does not agree with it. “She got a chance to change in Camelot and she betrayed us.” He argues.

“That was before Lucas.” Regina counters.

“You really think having a child can have that big an impact on her?” Robin asks.

“It did for me.” Regina answers. “Henry changed everything.”

Robin walks to the window, looking out while he thinks. He loves his son, but he despises everything about how he came to be. He doesn’t know whether to be happy or upset that he doesn’t even remember the night in question, all he knows is the shame he feels. Shame at succumbing to his own weaknesses and drinking copious amounts of liquor to try and dull the pain he felt at being without Regina. Shame at betraying Regina. Shame at not realizing that she wasn’t Marion. He shakes his head, breaking his reverie and he turns back to look at Regina. 

“How do we know she’ll not just try and take him?” Robin asks.

“She still has the cuff on.” Regina reassures him. “And I’ll take a few extra magical precautions.” 

“Fine.” Robin agrees, he’s not happy about it, but he’s doing this for Regina.

“Robin, I don’t want you to feel pressured in any way. He’s your son, it’s your decision. If you say no, I’ll never mention it again.” Regina worries he’ll resent her.

“I don’t want to do this, no.” Robin admits. “The fact is though that I’m more than likely blinded by my anger and deep down, very deep, I think I know you’re right. Lucas deserves a chance to know the woman who gave birth to him. That’s all I’m agreeing to though, one chance, if she steps out of line, that’s it.”  
Regina nods, and the thought occurs that she doesn’t think she’s actually happy to have convinced him. “I understand.”

“Let’s get this over with then.” Robin declares.

“Now?” Regina’s surprised.

“Sooner we do it, the sooner it’s over.” He says.


	25. Chapter 25

“Six weeks I’ve been sat down there in that little box! I was beginning to think you’d forgotten about me.” Zelena greets Regina as she enters the day room that has been commandeered in the hospital to host this meeting. 

“We kind of did.” Regina retorts with a fake wince. “Sorry.” She adds sarcastically. 

“Well, it’s understandable I suppose.” Zelena says, feigning sympathy. “You’ve had a lot on your plate what with your dead baby and all.” She taunts. 

Regina bites the inside of her lip, determined not to give Zelena the satisfaction of rising to her. “You’re right, I’ve been busy. How’s life in your cell been treating you?”

Zelena laughs. “Marvellously. Let’s get on with this, why am I here?”

“You’re here because despite both our better judgements, Robin’s going to allow you to see your son.” Regina tells her. 

“Six weeks later. How benevolent of you.” Zelena is unimpressed. 

“You’re getting one chance, step even a toe out of line and this is over.” Regina explains. 

“Why are you telling me this? Where’s daddy?” Zelena asks.

“Robin would rather have as little to do with you as possible.” Regina says coldly.

“Shame. He didn’t feel that 10 months ago.” Zelena taunts.

Regina can feel her hand itching to make a fireball but squeezes her fist closed tight until the feeling passes. Zelena watches her closely. 

“Where is the little one then?” She asks. 

“Robin has decided you will have a closely supervised visit with Lucas for 30 minutes.” Regina ignores her question and explains what Robin had dictated as the rules for this. 

“30 minutes? Might as well not even bother.” Zelena moans. “And Lucas? Ugh, what a pedestrian name.” 

“The cuff stays on you, no magic, and there is a protection spell around Lucas preventing anyone using magic to transport him.” Regina continues to explain. 

“Yes, yes, I’m sure you’ve thought of everything.” Zelena tries to hurry things along. 

Robin has been standing just outside the door listening to the conversation inside, none of it has made him any more inclined to do what he’s about to do, but he’s committed   
now so he fights against his instinct to take his son and get as far away from this woman as possible. He enters the room holding Lucas.

“Ah! There’s my babydaddy.” Zelena says with manic smile. 

Robin ignores her taunt, moving towards her and gently placing Lucas in her arms and steps back until he’s next to Regina. 

Zelena looks down at the baby for a moment, smiling. “He is a gorgeous little thing, isn’t he?” She says, looking at Robin and Regina. 

Robin is working his jaw, the sight of his son in her arms almost too much to bear. Regina looks passed her, to a spot on the wall behind her, refusing to give her the satisfaction   
of looking down. 

“Oh sis, this is just killing you isn’t it!” Zelena continues to taunt. “How does it feel, knowing I gave your ‘soulmate’ what you’re incapable of?” 

Regina refuses to react, she will not give her the satisfaction. Robin takes her hand in his.

“You two are adorable, standing there pretending this doesn’t bother you. I love it.” She laughs. “So what’s the plan here? Shared custody?” She asks overenthusiastically.

“Never.” Robin’s answer is little more than a growl through his gritted teeth.

“Careful lover, don’t strain yourself with all that thinking you’re doing.” She continues to taunt. 

“You will, at Robin’s discretion, have one thirty minute highly supervised visit a week.” Regina tells her through her own gritted teeth. 

“And you expect me to agree to that? Just quietly sit in my cell the rest of the time?” She asks.

“I expect that you don’t have a choice in the matter. You can take this or leave it, I know what my preferred option would be.” Regina answers, barely containing her own anger. 

Zelena tilts her head, as if she’s sizing them up. “Well then I suppose I have no option but to agree.” She says with an insincere smile. 

She spends the rest of her 30 minutes taunting Robin and Regina, little attention paid to the child in her arms and it does not go unnoticed by them. Once her time is up, Regina   
approaches her and takes Lucas from her.

“I can feel the jealousy radiating off you. Careful sis, I doubt you could pull off green as well as me.” Zelena whispers as she hands the baby over. 

“I’m the one going home with my family.” Regina whispers back with a smirk. “What exactly is it that I have to be jealous of?” 

Zelena glares at her. 

“Take her back to her cell.” Regina tells the orderly outside the door as she and Robin leave. 

 

 

“She cares nothing for the boy! Only for how she can use him against us!” Robin’s voice is raised. He and Regina have been having a heated discussion since they got home from the hospital. Lucas is asleep in his room, Roland and Henry are sleeping over at their grandparents again.

Regina sighs, he’s being saying this or some variation on it since they got home. 

“Robin, we’re going round in circles here. I don’t disagree with you.” She says sadly, slumping into the chair in the corner of their bedroom. 

“Then why do you keep insisting that we continue with this charade?” Robin asks, stalking back and forth across the room. 

“I’m not insisting on anything.” Regina is tired now, tired of this argument, tired of arguing in general. “I’m sorry Robin, I’m so sorry, this all my fault.” 

It’s Robin who sighs now. “Don’t start this again.” 

“None of this would be happening to you if it wasn’t for me!” It’s Regina who raises her voice now. 

“This is happening to us because of Zelena, there is no other reason!” Robin is frustrated beyond words at this point, he feels like this argument has been going on forever. 

“I can’t do this anymore.” Regina says, leaning forward in her seat, head in her hands. 

Robin crosses the room in an instant, he’s on his knees in front of her, taking her hands in his. “Can’t do what?” He asks, worry etched across his face, he cups her face the way he always does. 

“This.” She says, looking at him with despair. 

“Then we stop.” Robin says, as if it’s that simple. “I won’t let that woman near my boy again, as far I’m concerned, you are his mother.”

“I wish it were that simple.” Regina smiles. 

“Why can’t it be? She’s locked up and powerless, she can’t hurt us.” Robin tells her, using his thumb to stroke her face. 

“So we just leave her there forever?” Regina asks. 

“Why does it matter to you so much?” Robin asks, genuinely bewildered. 

“I don’t know.” Regina answers honestly. “I just…I feel responsible for her somehow.” 

“Well you’re not.” Robin tells her. 

“Robin I’m tired, can we just go to bed? I can’t talk about this anymore.” Regina is truly feeling bone weary now, all she wants to do is sleep. 

“Of course my love.” Robin helps her to stand and moves over to the bed with her.

Regina lies on her side, facing the door. “Hold me?” She asks, she hates showing such vulnerability but she needs him tonight. 

Robin lies behind her, spooning against her back, he pulls a blanket over them before enveloping her in his arm. 

“I love you.” She says, holding his hand, linking her fingers through his. 

“I love you too, nothing will ever change that.” He tells her, he knows it’s what she needs to hear. 

They fall asleep like that, fully clothed, limbs intertwined.


	26. Chapter 26

Regina suddenly sits bolt upright in bed. 

“Regina? What’s wrong?” Robin is awake the instant she sits up, alarmed. 

“Lucas.” She says. “Something’s wrong with Lucas!” She’s out of bed and running towards his room in an instant, Robin hot on her heels. 

Regina and Robin run to Lucas’s room to find Zelena looming over his crib. 

“Get away from my baby!” Regina growls, a fireball forming in her hand before she even thinks about it. 

Robin is at her side in an instant, bow drawn. 

“Your baby?” Zelena laughs. “Took you long enough to figure it out.” She sneers, waving her hand and holding them in place with her magic and extinguishing Regina’s fireball. 

Regina frowns in confusion, Robin struggles against the hold Zelena has them in. 

“Oh, you hadn’t worked it out. Well that was a textbook error.” She shrugs. “No matter, after six weeks cooped I’ve realized it’ll be more fun this way. You really sucked all the fun out of this today, being all reasonable about the situation.”

Robin and Regina continue to struggle against the hold. 

“I thought it would be fun to watch you suffer and yes, for a time, I’ve enjoyed this.” Zelena continues her taunting. 

“How?” Regina manages to get the word out through the iron grip Zelena’s got on her and Robin. 

“That little cuff you put on me? Did you really think that would hold me forever? I got that off weeks ago. I’ve been gallivanting around the town and you’ve no idea, too busy wallowing in your own self-pity. I must say, it’s been a joy to watch.” Zelena’s goading her now. “But, as they say, all good things must come to an end and as enjoyable as it’s   
been, it’s time for something new.”

Regina and Robin are still fighting against the magical hold she has on them, Regina manages to move her hand almost enough to spark another fireball but Zelena is watching her closely. 

Zelena tuts. “Naughty, naughty.” She lifts Regina off her feet, choking her. “Now, I’m not going to kill you dear sister, because it will be far more entertaining for me to know that you’re stuck here knowing that I took from you what you wanted most.” She pauses for dramatic effect. “Your child.” 

Regina tries to summon the light magic she used to defeat Zelena the last time, but she stops when Zelena picks up Lucas. She can’t risk attacking Zelena while she’s holding him. 

“Put. Him. Down.” Regina snarls. 

“Hmm.” Zelena pretends to think. “So you can attack me? I don’t think so.” She studies Regina’s face. “What’s wrong little sister?” She asks. “Oh, I see, you don’t believe me do you?” 

“Why would we?” It’s Robin who finally manages to break free enough to speak now. 

“Why indeed.” Zelena laughs again. “Anyway, love to chat but I’ve got plans.” She waves her hand and throws both Regina and Robin back against the wall, knocking them both unconscious. 

Zelena’s extremely frustrated to find that she can’t transport the baby away using magic, she hates walking places. 

 

 

Robin comes to first, rubbing the back of his head where it hit the wall. He’s immediately crawling over to where Regina lies still unconscious. 

“Regina!” He kneels next to her. “Regina wake up!”

Regina groans in response, taking a minute to come back to consciousness. “Where’s Lucas?” She asks, holding her own head as she stands up. Robin stands with her and steadies her while she stumbles.

“They’re both gone.” Robin tells her though by now she’s realized that for herself. 

“We have to go after them.” Regina starts for the door but stumbles again and Robin catches her again. 

“Regina, sit down for a minute you’re hurt.” He tells her but she fights against him. 

“We have to go she has our son!” Regina’s beside herself with worry.

“You believe her?” Robin asks, confused.

“No.” Regina answers immediately. “Yes. Maybe, I don’t know. It doesn’t matter either way, she’s taken Lucas and we have to get him back!” She says. 

“How do we even know where to look?” He asks. 

“If she’s planning to take him away, I know exactly where she’s going.” Regina tells him, moving her hand to transport herself there, Robin grabs her hand and stops her.

“Regina, you are not doing this alone!” He tells her.

“This is my fight!” She says angrily pulling her arm from his grip.

“No, it’s our fight!” Robin declares. “And we don’t have to do this alone.” 

 

A short while later Robin and Regina along with David, Mary Margaret, Emma and Killian are all standing in the sheriff’s station. 

“You’re right, it’s gone.” Emma tells Regina after looking in the evidence locker for the apprentice’s wand. 

“How can she have been loose for weeks and no one knew?” David asks. 

“It doesn’t matter, she’s obviously been planning this for a while.” Emma says angrily. 

“We should have been paying more attention!” Regina angrily slams her fist against one of the desks and ends up standing with both hands on the desk, leaning over it. 

“There’s no point going over things we can’t change, we need to find her and get Lucas back now!” Robin says as he rubs Regina’s back reassuringly. 

“So how do we do that?” Mary Margaret asks.

“I already tried a locator spell but it didn’t work.” Regina tells them, annoyed at it failing. 

“Is it possible it’s because you’re so…emotional?” Emma asks hesitantly, knowing how emotions affect her own magic.

“It’s possible.” Regina answers her with a flash of a glare. 

“Maybe I should try?” Emma suggests. 

“Be my guest.” Regina says. “I’m going to go out and look, I can’t just stand here doing nothing.” 

Just as Regina is about to move away from the desk there’s a flash of blue smoke between her hands where they rest on the desk and Lucas appears. She has him in her arms immediately and turns to Robin who in front of her holding onto her and Lucas in a second. 

“I don’t understand, I thought you said he couldn’t be transported magically?” Robin asks, awed to see his boy in Regina arms again. 

“I did, I don’t understand it.” Regina’s as shocked as he is. 

“You said you made it so nobody could move him?” Emma says, working out what’s happened as she speaks. “What if he moved himself?” She asks.

“Is that possible?” Robin asks. 

“I don’t know.” Regina answers. “I guess so.” She says. 

“It would make sense, he sent himself to where he felt safe, to you.” Mary Margaret reasons. 

“The important thing is, he’s here.” Robin says. 

“That doesn’t take care of the other issue though.” Killian says. 

“No, I’ll take care of her.” Regina declares. 

“Regina, we’re all here to help you.” Emma tells her.

“Regina!” There’s a shout from outside, it’s Zelena. “Regina get out here now!”

Regina passes Lucas to Robin who reluctantly takes him, knowing that the moment he does she’s going to go out and fight her sister. 

Regina is storming out of the sheriff’s station to confront Zelena before anyone can say anything to stop her. 

Robin passes Lucas to Mary Margaret who is then the only one to stay behind in the station, everyone else follows Regina outside. 

“Well, the gangs all here.” Zelena greets them. “You must be very proud your boy’s got magic.” She says maniacally. 

“I’m proud he’s smart enough already to want away from you.” Regina retorts. 

“He obviously didn’t get his intelligence from his father.” Zelena quips. 

“Well it hardly seems like he’s got it from his mother.” Killian retorts. “Your plan’s hardly going well here.” 

“You didn’t tell them.” Zelena laughs. “You still think I’m lying.” 

“Of course I think you’re lying, that’s what you do.” Regina tells her. 

“Fair point.” Zelena says with a shrug. “I want you to know though, I want you to know exactly what I did to you, what I took from you.” She continues, full of venom. “Thing is, the   
night your idiot boyfriend thinks he succumbed to my charms, he actually succumbed to the effects of a bottle of whisky.” She tells Regina. 

Regina looks at Robin who frowns in confusion, he can’t remember that night clearly at all. 

“You really are clueless.” Zelena continues with a sneer. “You were pregnant before we left for New York and I stole your baby, just like you stole my life! It was so easy, you didn’t even know, so convinced your silly little potion had worked all those years ago.” 

“Is that even possible?” David asks.

“You do surround yourself with dullards.” Zelena derides the whole group. “Of course it’s possible. That’s not even the best bit though!” Zelena says with a laugh. “I mean, not only did your infertility potion not work, it seems to have had the opposite effect.” She laughs. “It was just too good an opportunity when I found out you were pregnant again.”

“An opportunity?” Robin asks but he’s concerned he doesn’t want to know the answer. 

“I found a delightful little spell and I knew it would work perfectly because it had worked on you before.” Zelena is almost gleeful as she reveals the extent of what she’s done. 

“I don’t understand.” Robin’s confused by what she’s saying. 

“Of course you don’t, it’s all a bit much for your miniscule brain to process but my dear sister there understands. She finally understands what I’ve done to her.” Zelena's eyes are   
wide as she speaks, she’s grinning, delighted that Regina finally knows. 

“You killed my baby.” Regina realizes, a fireball forms in her hand as she says it and she’s thrown it at Zelena before she even consciously processes what she’s doing. 

Zelena deflects the fireball with her own magic and laughs. “Temper, temper little sister.” 

“You stole Lucas and then you killed our baby?” Robin is enraged.

“Ah, the penny finally drops for Robbie.” Zelena smirks. 

“There is something seriously wrong with you.” Killian tells Zelena. 

“So people keep saying.” She answers with a nonchalant shrug. 

“Wait, you said you found a spell that worked on Regina before, how’s that?” Emma asks, going over what Zelena’s said.

“Rumple.” Regina answers through gritted teeth, she’d worked that out as soon as Zelena said it. 

“Well done, I mean, it’s only taken you a few decades to work it out.” Zelena ridicules. “You didn’t really think he would allow you to have a child did you? That would have interfered with his precious plans for you.” Her jealousy is showing again. “I bet you wish he’d picked me now!” She cackles. 

Regina’s heard enough, she looks at Emma at the silently communicate to co-ordinate an attack, Emma nods and a burst of energy comes from both of their hands towards   
Zelena but she somehow throws it back at them and the entire group is flung backwards. 

“You can’t defeat me, I’ve had weeks to plan this! Once all your friends are dead, I’m going to take your son to where you’ll never see him again.” She sneers. “And then I’ve arranged a little surprise for you.” She adds smugly.

The group is back on their feet quickly, worried looks passing between them. 

“How is she this powerful?” David asks quietly.

“It’s the wand, she’s using it against us.” Regina tells them. 

“Well we have to get it from her.” Killian says.

“Thank you Captain Obvious.” Regina replies sarcastically. “Any ideas how we do that?”

“Magic’s your department love.” He counters.

“Whatever we’re going to do, we should probably do it fast.” David says. 

“We need to take magic out of the equation.” Regina reasons. “Emma, you and I have to get her over the town line.” 

“She’s not going to willingly cross.” Emma responds.

“Are you finished chatting?” Zelena asks. “I’ve not got all night here, places to be, people to kill.” 

“What is that?” Killian asks pointing down the street behind Zelena.

“Oh my god, did you actually think that would work?” Zelena laughs.

“I think your ‘surprise’ got here early.” Regina tells her, understanding what she’d meant now. 

Zelena turns just in time to be knocked off her feet by the Fury she herself had summoned, the apprentice’s wand is knocked from her hand and thrown towards the group, landing in the middle between them. The fury is zeroed in on Regina but Robin pulls her out of the way at the last second causing a howl of frustration from the fury. 

Emma, Killian, David and Zelena all scramble towards the wand. Emma reaches it first and knocks Zelena back with a burst of magic. 

The fury circles round to make another run for Regina, Emma makes it to her first, passing her the wand. 

“Here, you’re better with this than me.” Emma says as she hands it over. 

Regina’s first instinct is to use it destroy the fury, she summons the strongest attack she can muster as the fury swoops towards her but it’s nowhere near enough, all she manages to do is deflect it, it cries out and flies off into the distance but not out of their sight. 

“Does anyone have a plan here?” David asks. 

“Well, it’s not quite the order I had it planned in, but dragged to the underworld then I kill everyone you care about?” She shrugs. “I guess that’ll have to do.”

Regina tightens her grip on the wand as they see the fury approaching a third time. She points the wand, this time at Zelena, and pulse of light goes from the wand to Zelena. 

“What was that?” Zelena asks, clearly alarmed. “What did you just do?” She shouts frantically.

The fury gets closer, but instead of attacking Regina this time, its target is Zelena. Before she gets a chance to even realize what is happening the fury has her in its grasp and despite her throwing every bit of magic she has at it, she cannot get free. 

“No!” She screams as the fury lifts her into the air. “You will pay for this!” She declares as she’s dragged off into the night. 

There’s a silence over the group for a moment as they process what’s just happened.

“Everyone ok?” David asks. 

Suddenly, Regina is off and running back towards the Sherriff’s station, Robin is right behind her and the others follow behind him.

Regina bursts into the office, surprising Mary Margaret who’s standing holding Lucas with a sword drawn. 

“Oh thank god it’s you.” Mary Margaret says, relief washing over her, she’d been dreading what, or more accurately who, might burst through the door. “Is it over?” She asks.

“Yes.” Regina replies and Mary Margaret places the sword on the desk as Regina approaches her, Robin at her side. “Is he?”

“He’s absolutely fine. “ Mary Margaret says, handing him over with a smile.

Regina cradles the baby in her arms, Robin stands in front of Regina now and places a hand over Lucas’s torso, feeling an overwhelming need for physical contact with his child. 

He leans his head forward and Regina does the same, they stand for a moment, foreheads touching holding Lucas, letting relief wash over them. Robin then kisses Regina and they break apart as David, Emma and Killian enter the office. 

“Are you ok?” Mary Margaret rushes to her husband and daughter. 

“We’re fine.” David reassures her, enveloping her in a brief hug. 

“Ok, so I’ll say it, what the hell just happened?” Emma asks.

Regina leans back against one of the desks, feeling drained and Robin does the same next to her, putting an arm around her shoulder, Lucas gurgles happily in her arms. 

“I transferred the debt she called on.” Regina explains. 

“How?” Mary Margaret asks.

“I’m not exactly sure.” Regina admits. “When I was holding the apprentice’s wand I just suddenly knew I could.”

“Are we going to talk about what Zelena was saying before she was dragged off to hell?” Killian asks, earning an unsubtle elbow in the ribs from Emma.

“What?” Mary Margaret asks, oblivious to what had happened outside. 

“What she was saying doesn’t matter.” Regina declares. “He’s ours whether it’s true or not.” 

Robin kisses Regina again as Mary Margaret looks at David in confusion, he gives her a look that conveys he’ll tell her later. 

“Judging from the way he transported himself to you, it seems he agrees.” Robin says proudly. “Though I imagine a baby with magic is going to be a bit of a handful.” He says with a smile. 

“It’s almost morning.” David declares. “How about I call Granny, let her know the coast is clear and have her bring the boys to the diner? I don’t know about you, but I could do with some breakfast.” 

“Sounds like a good idea to me.” Emma agrees. 

“Yes.” Robin concurs. “We’ll meet you there.” He says, essentially politely dismissing everyone from the sheriff’s station. 

“Robin?” Regina looks at him questioningly. 

“I believe her.” He says, his eye contact with her unwavering. 

“Robin…” Regina sighs. 

“I know.” He says with a smile. “I know exactly what you’re thinking and we’re not going to stand here arguing about it just now.” He says, kissing her forehead again. “But I love you and you are Lucas’s mother no matter what.” He continues with a smile. “And that witch is exactly where she deserves to be.” He adds, knowing the Regina will start to doubt herself. 

Regina smiles. “Let’s go and have breakfast with our family.”


	27. Chapter 27

When Robin and Regina get to Granny’s a couple of tables have been pushed together in the centre of the diner to allow them all to sit around the same table, it’s early so they have the diner to themselves. No sooner have they opened the door than Roland is up and running towards them, barrelling into their legs and hugging them tightly. No one had told him what was going of course, but he was old enough now that he knew fine well when something was amiss. Robin picks him up and gives him a tight hug and Regina leans over and kisses his forehead, she’s still holding Lucas, she hasn’t put him down since she got him back from Mary Margaret. Henry rushes to join them, hugging his mom tightly then Robin. 

“I’m so glad you’re ok.” Henry tells them. 

Regina is directed to sit across from Mary Margaret and the concerned glances that she keeps receiving indicate that David’s managed to fill her in on what Zelena has said. Robin is at one side, so close their touching, Roland insists on sitting on her knee, it’s a somewhat difficult proposition when she’s still holding Lucas but she manages it for a time until Henry, who is at her other side takes the boy onto his lap instead. She enjoys having all her boys so close even if it does make eating her breakfast more than a little awkward at first. 

Conversation is flowing round the table, Regina remains fairly quiet however and she can feel rather than see the concerned looks that keep getting thrown her way. It’s starting to grate slightly. Everyone’s mood remains jovial though, they’re all happy to have gotten out of this latest scrape and are still riding an adrenaline high after the morning’s  
events.

The door to the diner opens and a heavy silence falls immediately, Rumplestiltskin stands in the doorway, looking at the group strangely. 

“Good morning.” He says with a smile. 

Robin puts an arm around Regina protectively and all eyes in the group are on her. Even Henry and Granny who don’t know the whole story can sense that the sudden palpable tension is centred around her. 

“I can’t see him just now.” Regina says to Robin, she’s barely above a whisper but David hears it and jumps up, Hook following suit. 

David squares up to Rumple, Hook at his side. 

“I think you better leave.” David tells him authoritatively. 

“I beg your pardon?” Rumple is confused, he’s not exactly been welcomed with open arms by the group, but this is downright hostility. 

“You heard me.” David says, crossing his arms over his chest to reinforce his point. 

“I don’t understand.” Rumple looks passed David and Hook to the group, trying to assess exactly what is going on. 

“Let’s just say some new information about some of your past actions has come to light.” Hook explains, tone full of hostility. He and Regina have a complicated relationship, but  
he has always believed there are lines that should not be crossed and children are one of them. 

Regina keeps her head down, focusing on Lucas and Roland instead, she can’t look at him, Robin squeezes her shoulder reassuringly, his jaw clenching, he want nothing more than to get up and let his fists do the talking, but he won’t. Henry, has turned and is doing his best to shield his mother from his grandfather. He still doesn’t know exactly what’s happened, but seeing her reaction to him walking in is enough to bring out his protective side. Granny’s behind the counter watching the scene unfold.

Understanding dawns on Rumple as he looks at the scene, he’s not sure exactly what it is they all know now, but it’s clear one of his darker deeds has come to light. 

“Do you care to enlighten me as to which particular deed you’re referring to?” Rumple asks casually. 

“The fact that you have to ask is reason enough for you to leave.” David tells him.

“I will leave, once I’ve done what I came here to do.” Rumple replies arrogantly. “I need to speak to Regina.” 

“That’s not happening.” David says, taking a step forward. 

“Oh, but it is.” Rumple says, waving his hand and freezing everyone but Regina in place. 

She turns to him, eyes wide with shock and she stands and takes a step backwards, holding Lucas protectively. 

“How?” She asks.

“You didn’t really think you could defeat the darkness did you?” He says with a laugh. 

“What do you want?” She asks, her mind is racing.

“Well, I understand you were wielding the apprentices’ wand this wand this morning.” He says with a smile. “I want it.” 

“What for?” She asks as she unconsciously backs further away.

“That’s my business.” He answers.

“You know I’m not going to just hand it over.” She tells him. 

“Oh, I do.” He admits, still with the supercilious smile. “Problem is, this new, nicer, friendlier you has so much more to lose.” He gestures to the group with the hand. “I mean, I’m spoiled for choice over who I can threaten.”

She’s filled with rage the more he speaks, her hand twitches to make a fireball but she won’t risk it with Lucas in her arms, she knows it would be useless anyway.

“I swear if you so much as touch a hair on their heads!” She declares.

“Such anger.” He’s amused. “What exactly is it you found out this morning?” He asks, curious.

She glares at him, nostrils flailing, she’s so angry she can barely see straight. 

“Does it matter? Just about every awful thing in my life can be traced back to you! In fact I’m beginning to doubt there’s been a single event in my life you didn’t manipulate into being!” Her voice is low and steady but full of venom.

“You made your own choices my dear.” He tells her, still smiling.

“And you made damn sure they would be the wrong ones!” Her voice is a little louder now and Lucas starts to stir in her arms.

Rumple waves his hand and then frowns as whatever he was intending doesn’t happen.

“Well, that’s quite the little protection spell you’ve got there.” He tells her. “Still, it won’t help if I were to throw you both back against that wall or do I need to threaten another of your brood?” He walks around the table. “The little one?” His hand hovers over Roland. “Perhaps the thief, I could finish what I started so long ago.” 

“Do not touch my family!” She can’t help it, a fireball forms in the hand she’s not using to hold Lucas. 

“Temper, temper dearie.” He laughs again. “You know you can’t win in a fight with me. No one has to get hurt, just give me the wand.”

She continues to glare at him as she extinguishes the fireball herself.

“I’m losing patience Regina.” He says, rounding the table. “Perhaps your lovely step-daughter, you two seem closer than ever these days.” 

“Does Belle know you’re back to your old self?” She asks trying to fight back the only way she can.

“That’s really none of your concern.” He says, anger in his tone betraying the fact that Belle obviously does not know.

“Ah, so that’s a no.” Regina taunts. “I doubt she’ll be pleased to learn that your lust for power once again won out over your supposed love for her.” 

“This is a dangerous game to play dearie when I hold the lives of those you claim to love in my hands. Now, give me the wand and I’ll be on my way.” He takes a step towards her.

Regina steps backwards again, she’s literally and figuratively backed into a corner. 

“Fine.” She gives in, she can’t see another way out of this right now. “Here.” She uses her magic to transport the wand from the sheriff station, where she’d left it under a protection spell only she or Emma could get through, to the table in front of Rumple.

“Was that really so difficult?” He asks as he picks up the wand with a flourish. “Thank you dearie.” He says sarcastically then with a wave of his hand disappears in a cloud of smoke.

As soon as he’s gone, the group around the table falls out of the hold he had on them. 

They’re all on their feet in an instant, Regina rushes to Robin and her boys. 

“Are you guys ok?” She asks hugging Henry and Roland and kissing their foreheads. 

“Yeah mom, we’re ok.” Henry answers for them both as Robin picks up Roland and hugs him. 

Robin then hugs Regina.

“Are you alright? And Lucas?” He asks.

“Yeah, we’re fine.” She answers. 

“Everyone else?” He asks the group.

They all confirm they’re fine as David and Mary Margaret fuss over Neal, Emma and Hook embrace and Granny looks royally pissed off.

“What the hell just happened?” Emma asks what everyone is thinking.

“I thought you had trapped the dark one magic in its vault?” David asks Regina.

“So did I!” She confirms. 

“So how did this happen?” Mary Margaret asks. “And what does he want with the wand?”

“I don’t know!” Regina snaps, frustration evident. “But I’m going to find out.”


	28. Chapter 28

“You alright?” Robin asks Regina again after gently directing her away from the group for some privacy.

“Fine.” Regina answers tersely. “I’m going to take Lucas home.” She says, the scrutiny of the others is too much for her. 

“I’ll come with you.” Robin says.

“No.” She answers quickly, too quickly. “Stay and let the kids finish their breakfast.” She adds, tone softer and with a small smile. "Rumple got what he came for, I don't think he'll be back, not for a while anyway."

Robin looks at her for a moment before agreeing. “Ok, if you’re sure.” He’s not happy about it, but he’ll give her the space she clearly wants for the moment. 

The whole group watches as Regina leaves and then all turn to Robin.

“Do we need to be worried?” Emma asks him.

He’s not sure how to answer. 

“Maybe someone should go after her.” Mary Margaret suggests.

“She was pretty clear she wants some time to herself.” Robin replies.

“Historically, that’s never played out very well though has it mate?” Hook says.

“Will someone tell me what’s going on?” Henry asks. “What happened with my mom and my Grandpa?” 

“Henry.” Emma says in a cautionary tone. 

“I’m not a kid anymore!” Henry protests. 

“We know.” Mary Margaret says with a sigh. 

“Look, let’s you and me go for a walk buddy and we’ll talk about it.” David offers. 

Henry looks between all the adults, most of whom are looking extremely uncomfortable. 

“Fine.” He agrees. 

Henry and David leave the diner together, David putting his arm around his grandson as he braces himself for a difficult conversation. 

An uncomfortable silence then falls over the group. 

“Papa?” It’s Roland who finally breaks the silence, turning to look at his father once he’s finished eating, his face smothered in syrup from the pancakes he’s been eating. 

“Yes?” Robin answers with a smile as he wipes the boy’s face.

“Can we go see Mama now or are we not allowed?” He asks, he’s picked up on more of the conversation than they’d hoped.

“Of course we’re allowed.” Robin answers. “Thing is, your mama…” He trails off trying to think how best to explain things to his young son. 

“Thing is lad, your mother thought you might be able to help me out today.” Hook jumps in. “See, I’ve heard you’re quite the fisherman and she thought you might be able to teach me a thing or two.” He tells the boy, flashing him a smile. 

“Really?” Roland asks excitedly. 

“Really.” Hook confirms. 

“Can I Papa?” He asks Robin, practically bouncing out of his chair with excitement. 

“Of course.” Robin tells him, sending Killian an appreciative look, Roland’s so excited he’s already forgotten about the mornings events. 

Roland and Hook are the next to leave, hand in hand, heading for the docks. 

“Who’d have thought we’d live to see the day Captain Hook was a good babysitting option.” Mary Margaret jokes once they’ve gone.

Emma throws her mother a look after rolling her eyes. 

“I think I’ll join them.” She says, getting up and running out to catch up with Hook and Roland. 

“Are you alright?” Mary Margaret asks Robin. “This all must be a lot for you to deal with as well.” 

“I’m fine.” Robin replies quickly, without even really thinking about it. 

“Right.” Mary Margaret says sceptically. “You know where we are if you need us.” She says and then leaves with baby Neal. 

Robin’s left alone at the table with his thoughts but it’s not long before he too is up and leaving, heading for home, he’s never let her push him away before and he’ll be damned if he starts now. 

 

He hesitates momentarily as he opens the door the house, before pushing through his doubt and continuing in. He quickly searches the rooms and then heads upstairs when she’s nowhere to be found. He starts to get a little concerned when there is no sign of her in the baby’s room, but then breathes a sigh of relief when he finds her in their room.  
She’s sitting on the floor at the foot of the bed, her back resting against the bed, her legs crossed. She’s still holding Lucas in her arms, staring down at him, tears are filling her eyes but they’re not falling. 

“Regina?” He speaks softly, trying not to startle her.

“I almost lost him.” She says, not looking up. “Again.” 

Robin sits down on the floor next to her. 

“But we didn’t.” He says. 

“All I bring is death and pain into the lives of anyone who gets close to me.” She speaks quietly but seems firm in her resolve. 

“That’s not true.” Robin argues.

“Isn’t it?” She turns to look at him as she asks. “Look at everything that’s happened to you since you met me.”

“Nothing that we have been through has made me regret for one second having you in my life.” He emphasizes the word we as he speaks and he means every word of it. 

She doesn’t speak for a long while, instead focusing on Lucas again who’s sleeping contentedly. 

“I wanted to kill him.” She finally says quietly.

Robin frowns, it takes him a second to process the sudden jump in conversation. 

“Rumplestiltskin?” He confirms.

“I couldn’t even look at him, I couldn’t trust myself.” There’s an undercurrent of rage in her tone. 

“That’s a perfectly reasonable reaction.” He reassures her, truth is, he wanted to do the same. 

“I’ve been trying so hard to be a better person.” She looks at him again and there is desperation in her eyes. 

“You are a better person.” He tells her. “Regina feeling anger towards the man you’ve just found out did something so heinous does not make you a bad person and it is not  
something you need to feel guilty about, I felt the same when I saw him.” 

“I just want to be happy.” She’s pleading. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted and I thought maybe I’d finally found that with you and Henry and Roland but it’s like something is determined that I’ll never have that.” It’s frustration, not self-pity talking. 

“You have me, Henry, Roland and Lucas, we’re not going anywhere.” He tries his best to reassure her.

“You can’t promise that.” She argues. 

“I can promise that I will spend every day of my life trying my best to ensure your happiness.” He vows.

She looks at him, a strange mixture of shock, love and disbelief on her face. 

“I don’t deserve you.” She says, securing Lucas in one arm and using the hand to stroke his cheek lovingly. 

Robin leans forward and kisses her, tenderly at first but it slowly builds to a more passionate kiss until they both have to come up for air. They both lean their heads forwards and  
sit with their foreheads touching as the try and get their breath back. 

“Do you think you can bring yourself to put Lucas down yet?” He asks, pulling his head back to look at her. 

“Not yet.” She admits with a shy smile. 

“Ok.” He can understand her need to be close to him after the morning’s events. He sits next to her for a while, quietly pondering. “I need to you promise me something.” He says.  
“What?” She asks. 

“I know that it goes against every instinct you have, but I need you to promise me you’re not going to shut me out again.” 

She opens her mouth to speak but can’t find the words. 

“I can’t lose you.” He tells her, he’s come too close too many times in the last few months.

“You won’t.” She answers.

“Now who’s making promises they can’t keep.” He says with a smile. 

They kiss again but break apart when Lucas starts crying. 

“I guess somebody’s upset he’s not getting all of his mother’s attention.” Robin says with a smile. 

Regina adjusts position, shushing the baby and soon he’s back to gurgling happily. 

“Where are the boys?” She asks, suddenly aware that the house is quiet.

“Roland’s gone fishing with Hook and Emma.” He tells her with a smile. “Henry’s with his grandfather.” Robin hesitates for a moment. “He insisted on knowing what happened this  
morning.” 

“David’s told him?” She asks, alarmed. 

“I believe he was going to, yes.” Robin answers honestly.

She sits quietly for a moment processing this news. 

“You ok?” He asks. 

“He was going to find out one way or another I suppose.” She admits sadly.

“We will be ok, you do know that don’t you?” He asks her.

“I’m so tired of fighting Robin.” She admits, her whole body seeming to sag with exhaustion as she does so. He puts an arm around her and she leans against him, her head  
against his shoulder. 

“You don’t have to do it alone anymore.” He won’t lie, she will have to fight, but he’ll be by her side. 

She doesn’t answer, her eyes growing so heavy she can’t keep them open anymore until she sags against him, her body giving out to the exhaustion. 

He smiles, gently lifting Lucas from her arms and leaning her back against the bed while he carefully places his son in the centre of the bed, then he goes back and lifts Regina  
from the floor and places her in bed before lifting Lucas and taking up position to watch over Regina. 

 

Robin sits watching over her as she sleeps, he’s on high alert, cradling his son in his arms. He doesn’t trust Rumplestiltskin to not just appear in the room at any moment and try to finish what he started this morning. 

He’s pulled from his thoughts when he notices a change in Regina’s breathing, her face contorting into a pained expression. She’s having a nightmare. Again.

She won’t talk about them but he knows she has them almost every night, she does her best to try and hide it but she wakes up drenched in sweat, panting for breath with a terrified expression and then tries to tell him she’s fine, she always insists she’s fine even when it’s painfully obvious nothing could be farther from the truth. He’s about to wake her when she’s suddenly sat bolt upright in the bed, eyes wide with fear, panting for breath. 

It takes her a moment to get her bearings and once she does she looks over to him. “I’m fine.” She says before he even asks. “But we’ve got a problem.” She tells him, fearful about the implication of what she’s just remembered. 

“What are you talking about?” Robin asks, moving to sit next to her on the bed.

“Hades.” She tells him. “I think Hades is working with Zelena.” 

“Regina, it was a nightmare…” Robin tries to reassure her. 

“No.” She’s adamant. “It was a memory.” 

“You never said you encountered Hades in the underworld.” Robin’s shocked. 

“He took my mother somewhere.” She tells him. 

“Your mother?” He asks, surprise evident in his tone. 

“Where are the boys?” She asks, panic stricken.

“Regina calm down, everyone is at Granny’s for dinner. They’re safe.” Robin tries again to reassure her. 

“No, they’re not! None of us are!” She getting louder and it’s enough to disturb Lucas who’s been sleeping in his father’s arms. 

“Ok, we’ll go to them, please try to calm down.” He says placing a gentle kiss to her forehead. 

She sighs and then uses her magic to transport them all to outside of Granny’s. She rushes in, quickly followed by Robin. 

“Mom!” Henry sees her first, smiling when he sees his mother. The whole group turns its attention to Regina and Robin. David and Mary Margaret are in a booth with Roland and Robin, Emma and Hook are in the next booth. 

“Regina what’s wrong?” Mary Margaret asks, she can see the fear in Regina’s eyes.

“We’re all in terrible danger.” She tells them, trying her best to stay calm for the sake of the boys.

“When are we not?” Hook quips.

Emma looks at him disapprovingly. 

Granny takes Lucas from Robin and then turns to Roland. “Can you help me feed your little brother?” She asks him. 

He nods and takes her free hand, heading over to the counter with her, out of earshot of the conversation about to take place. His earshot anyway, Granny would still be able to  
hear perfectly well. 

“Regina what’s going on?” Emma has stood and is next to Regina now, guiding her towards the booth where her parents are sitting, they booth slide in next to Henry and Hook  
and Robin take chairs from other tables and sit at the end. 

“I think.” She pauses to correct herself. “I mean, I’m pretty sure that Hades is helping Zelena.” She tells them. 

“Hades as in the Lord of the Underworld?” David asks.

“Yes.” Regina confirms.

“What makes you think that?” Mary Margaret asks.

“I remembered something he said and it suddenly made everything make sense.” Regina explains.

“You just, remembered?” Emma asks, somewhat sceptically. 

“You were having a nightmare.” David realizes. 

“Yes.” Regina admits with a sigh. “But it was a memory, I just didn’t realize the significance of what h said at the time.”

“We believe you.” Mary Margaret reassures her, laying her hand over Regina’s reassuringly. 

“Isn’t Hades trapped in the underworld for all eternity though?” Hook asks. 

“He was. Until true love restarted his heart.” 

They all turn to the door, where the voice had come from to see Zelena standing with a man. They’re all on their feet in seconds, Emma, Hook, David and Mary Margaret moving to  
shield Henry while Robin, Regina and Granny do the same with Roland and Lucas. 

“Hades I presume.” Hook says what the others are thinking. 

“That’s right.” He confirms with smile. 

“What do you want?” David asks.

“Oh, so many things.” Hades replies nonchalantly. “But for now, I’ll start with her.” He says waving his hand in Regina’s direction and smiling when she disappeared in a cloud of  
his magic. 

Robin makes a move towards Hades and Zelena but they themselves disappear before he can get to them. 

“What the hell do they want with Regina?” David asks.

“Nothing good.” Emma replies. 

“We have to find her.” Mary Margaret says resolutely. 

“We will.” Robin says. "I always will."


	29. Chapter 29

Regina finds herself appearing in the cannery, strapped to a table in what is an extremely uncomfortable yet worryingly familiar situation. There’s a machine next to the table that looks just like the one Owen used. 

She struggles against the restraints holding her down but it’s no use, they’re not budging. She tries to summon her magic to free herself but nothing happens. A growl of frustration escapes. 

“Oh, I slipped a little something on your wrist dear sister, can’t have you leaving before I’ve had my fun.” Zelena appears from the shadows. 

“What is this?” Regina asks, she knows the answer, but she’ll delay it as long as she can. 

“One of the perks of having the lord of the underworld for a boyfriend.” Zelena tells her with a smile. “You see, once you were down there, Hades got to see all of your worst fears and memories so I thought we’d take a nice little trip down memory lane. I mean, there were so many to choose from, I’ll admit it was a struggle to know where to start.” She tells her with a shrug. “But this one seemed perfect, convenient location, lots of suffering for you.” 

“If you know all this about me why the hell are you still so jealous of my life?” Regina’s beyond angry now. 

“You brought all of this on yourself!” Zelena shouts. “You turned against our mother! She wanted to give you everything but you rejected her. You didn’t want it!” She start sticking the electrode pads onto Regina, in the exact places Owen had. 

“Why don’t you just get this over with and kill me then!” Regina’s had enough of this. “Enough of these stupid games of yours.” 

“You’d like that wouldn’t you? No! I want to see you suffer.” Zelena says, connecting the electrodes to the machine. 

“You murdered my child!” Regina snarls.

“Yes, I did.” Zelena says, smiling proudly. “But I also carried another one for you.” She admits, less proud of that. “I may not have entirely thought that plan through but I will take him from you again, I’m going to take all your children from you. I’m going to take everything you love away from you. But first, I’m going to make you suffer. I’m going to break you and then I’m going to make you watch as I kill everyone you care about.”

“You will not touch my children!” Regina is enraged. 

“Oh, I will. I’ll enjoy every second of it, just like I enjoyed taking Lucas from you the first time. You’ve no idea how amusing it was for me, the only one of them that was actually your child and you rejected him.” Zelena taunts.

“I’m going to kill you.” Regina vows.

Zelena laughs and then flicks a switch on the machine sending electricity coursing through Regina’s body. Her back arches and she can’t help the scream that escapes her mouth and that agony the machine causes. It’s even worse than she remembered. “I’m going to enjoy this.” Zelena says with a cackle. 

 

“I think I can do a locator spell.” Emma says, sounding anything but sure.

The group is still stood in Granny’s, trying to decide the best way forward.

“That’s all very well but what do we do when we find her?” Hook asks. “Zelena’s a powerful witch in her own right but she’s got a god on her side!”

“We’ve been up against tough odds before.” Mary Margaret, ever hopeful, tells them. 

“I hate to say it but he’s got a point.” David admits. “Us rushing in without a plan or any way to effectively fight isn’t going to help Regina.” 

“Rumplestiltskin I summon thee.” Robin says. 

The group look at him, shocked. 

“Don’t you need the dagger for that?” Hook asks. 

“Not necessarily dearie, I appear for whom I want to.” Rumple says after he appears in the diner. 

“Hades has taken Regina.” Robin tells him.

“And that’s my problem because?” Rumple asks.

“Because he’s helping Zelena.” Robin says, knowing Rumple’s hatred for the witch that killed his son is a weak spot. 

“I see, well yes, that does change matter somewhat.” Rumple admits. 

“So you’ll help us?” Mary Margaret asks.

“I didn’t say that.” Rumple replies.

“Grandpa, you owe her.” Henry steps forward.

“I went to the underworld to bring her back.” Rumple says. 

“Which was a start.” Henry retorts. “I know about what you did, we all know.”

“I’m sorry, you’ll have to be more specific.” Rumple tells him.

“You killed her baby.” Henry says angrily. “To make sure she became the evil queen.”

“Oh.” Rumple says. “That.” 

“You killed her child so you could find my dad, I’d say you have a pretty big debt to my mom that you are nowhere near repaying.” 

“More to the point you do this and we’ll give you a free pass on whatever it is you wanted that wand for.” Emma says. “Assuming it’s not to kill someone.”

“It’s not.” Rumple confirms. 

“Do we have a deal?” Emma asks.

“You and I don’t have a particularly good history when it comes to deals Miss Swan.” He replies.

“Fine, then make the deal with me.” Henry says. 

“No.” Rumple says. “I’ll help you, but only on the condition that no one interferes when it comes to me and the witch.”

They all look around each other in the group. None of them have a problem with that. 

“I think we can agree to that.” David says. 

“Good.” Rumple says with a nod. “First things first, we need a protection spell on the children. If Zelena is true to form, they’ll be her next target.” Rumple says.

“So it is true?” Robin asks. 

“That Zelena stole the child from Regina’s womb? Yes. I couldn’t figure out how she managed a spell so powerful but knowing she had Hades help it makes sense now.” Rumple answers matter-of-factly.

“You knew?” Robin asks angrily, he moves to take a step towards him but David put a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

“Of course, you can’t cast a spell that powerful without the dark one knowing about it. I could tell as soon as we were all back in this town.” He tells him with a smile.

“Then why didn’t you say anything?” Henry asks.

“Simple, there was no gain in it for me.” Rumple replies with a shrug. “Now, Miss Swan, you ought to be the one to cast this, we know light magic is Zelena’s weakness. Henry, you hold the baby.” He instructs.

Emma does as Rumple instructs and soon all three boys are encompassed in a burst of white light from her hands. 

“You guys ok?” She asks after the light has died away.

“Yeah, I think so.” Henry answers.

“Of course they are.” Rumple says, annoyed. 

“You’ll forgive me if I don’t entirely trust the man who was threatening them twelve hours ago.” Emma replies.

“Fair point.” Rumple admits. “That will keep them safe from Zelena, and we know that you can fight her Miss Swan, Hades however, that’s another matter entirely.”

“I’m sure you must have something up your sleeve.” David says.

“I have an idea, yes, but it probably won’t work and knowing the gods of old, it will probably be dangerous.” He explains.

“I’ll do it.” Robin volunteers instantly. 

“So gallant, you don’t even know what it is yet.” Rumple mocks.

“It’s something to help Regina, that’s all I need to know.” Robin replies.

“Very well, I’m going to send you to meet Hades brother. They have a sibling rivalry that somewhat eclipses Regina and Zelena’s, if anyone can help to defeat Hades, Zeus can.” Rumple says, and with a wave of his hand, Robin disappears in a cloud of smoke. 

“How will he get back?” David asks.

“That, I’m afraid, depends entirely on how successful he is in convincing Zeus to help.” Rumple replies. “You know how to get me if he comes back.” Rumple says and then with a flourish of his hand transports himself away. 

“If? He said if he comes back.” Emma realizes.

“He’ll be back.” Mary Margaret says confidently. “He’ll do whatever he has to to get Regina back.” 

 

Early the next morning, the group are gathered in the kitchen of David and Mary Margaret’s loft. They’d waited for hours in Granny’s before they’d reluctantly realized that it didn’t seem like Robin was coming back that night. Everyone was exhausted, no one having slept very well due to combination of worry and Lucas crying most of the night. The infant wouldn’t settle no matter what they did. He was still gurning unhappily in Mary Margaret’s arms now. 

Roland comes down stairs, rubbing his eyes sleepily, his curly hair an unruly mess. 

“Is my papa back?” Roland asks.

“No sweetheart, not yet.” Mary Margaret answers, sitting at the dining table, trying her best to comfort Lucas who’s fussing and refusing to take his bottle. 

Roland walks straight over to where Mary Margaret’s sitting, looking intently at his little brother as he does so. 

“Roland what is it?” Mary Margaret asks. 

“He’s upset because mama’s hurt.” He replies matter-of-factly, still staring intently at the baby. 

Everyone’s attention turns to the boy at this statement. 

“Roland what do you mean?” David asks, he’s sitting next to Mary Margaret feeding Neal. 

He shrugs, suddenly self-conscious that everyone in the room is looking at him. 

“Did you have a bad dream Roland?” Emma asks.

He shakes his head, becoming shy suddenly. He knows what he meant but he’s not too young not to notice the way people look at him whenever he’s mentioned certain things before. 

“Roland, what did you mean mom’s hurt?” Henry asks, kneeling in front of his younger brother.

“I don’t know.” He replies quietly. “I just know that’s why Lucas is so upset.” He says, barely above a conspiratorial whisper to Henry. 

It’s enough to convince Henry. 

“We have to find her.” Henry declares.

“We will.” Emma tries to reassure him, placing a hand on his shoulder. 

“Robin will be back soon.” Mary Margaret says, with more confidence than she feels. 

“If my mom’s hurt though, we can’t wait!” Henry argues.

“We don’t know that for sure though.” David says, trying to be diplomatic.

“The wicked witch and the lord of the underworld hardly took her for a friendly chat though, did they?” Hook admits. 

“Not helpful.” Emma says to him quietly through gritted teeth. 

“We have to do something!” Henry implores the group. 

“We are doing something kid.” Emma argues. “Robin has gone to make sure we can actually help Regina when we find her.” 

“It’s not enough!” Henry argues.

“Your mom wouldn’t want us rushing in with no plan.” David tells him. 

“She would do it for you!” Henry counters.

“You’re right Henry.” Mary Margaret tries to calm her grandson down. “But David’s right too, getting ourselves killed won’t help Regina.”

Henry deflates somewhat, he knows she’s right. 

As if on cue, Robin bursts through the apartment door. 

“We can stop Hades!” He declares, holding a white crystal out in his hand. 

“Papa!” Roland runs to his father and is enveloped in a hug as Robin leans down and picks him up.

“Where were you?” Henry asks what everyone is wondering. 

“Believe it or not, Mount Olympus.” Robin replies. “Zeus is none too happy his brother is interfering in mortal matters, he gave me this to help to defeat him.” He explains, indicating the crystal. 

“What is it?” David asks.

“Something called Olympian crystal, it requires magic to wield it, so Emma I suppose it’s up to you.” Robin says, handing it over to Emma.

Emma turns the crystal over in hand looking at in surprise. “I have no idea what to with this.” She says. 

“Perhaps I can be of help.” Rumple says, appearing behind Robin in the doorway.

“You do know it’s really creepy when you do that.” Emma tells him. 

Rumple merely smiles enigmatically in response. 

“Should we really be handing something that can defeat a god over to him?” David asks.

“If you want to actually defeat that god, then yes.” Rumple replies.

“I don’t trust him anymore than you, but much as I hate to admit it he’s our best shot at this. He might not care about Regina, but he wants Zelena dead as much as any of us.” Emma says, reluctantly handing him the crystal. 

“Let’s go.” Rumple says.

“Where?” Robin asks.

“They’re in the cannery.” Rumple says, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. 

“Hold on a minute, we can’t just leave the children here.” Mary Margaret says, involuntarily shuddering as she remembers the last time they’d found Regina there. She’d felt some of what Regina had gone through.

Rumple sighs and waves his hand causing Henry, Roland, Neal and Lucas to vanish in a cloud of smoke.

“What did you do?” David asks.

“I sent them to the old wolf, I presume that’s where you were planning on dumping them?” He says.

They glare at him. 

“Let’s go.” He says again, waving his hand again and transporting the entire group to outside the cannery.


	30. Chapter 30

“Let’s go!” Robin says charging towards the doors of the cannery. 

The others look at each for a second, until Rumple shrugs in an affirmation that he’s ready to go and they set off after Robin. 

“I’m getting a horrible sense of déjà vu.” Mary Margaret says as they enter the building. 

“What are you talking about?” Robin asks. 

“This isn’t the first time we’ve had to rescue Regina from this building.” David tells him. 

Robin frowns in confusion, his expression questioning David. 

“It’s a long story, but suffice to say she wasn’t in great shape when we got to her, it’s not a particularly pleasant memory.” David admits.

“If they’ve brought her to a building she has a particularly unpleasant past in I doubt it’s an accident.” Rumple says. 

Mary Margaret and David look at each other in alarm before rushing off in the direction of the room where they’d found Regina the last time, the others hot on their heels. 

Before they can reach it their worst fears are confirmed when a gut wrenching scream comes from the direction they are headed in, Regina’s scream. 

“Hurry.” Robin says, picking up the pace.

The whole group bursts into the room to find Zelena standing next to Regina, who is still lying tied down to the table, hooked up to electrodes. Hades appears behind Zelena as the group enters. 

Before he even has a chance to react Rumple raises the crystal and points it at him. 

“Where did you get that?” He asks, more than a hint of fear in his voice.

“A little present from your brother.” Rumple answers with a smirk. 

“Now, let’s talk about this.” Hades says, trying to negotiate his way out of the situation.

Before he can say anything else, Rumple uses the crystal, a beam of light emerging from the end and hitting Hades who disintegrates before their eyes into a pile of ash.

“No!” Zelena screams. “What did you do?” 

“I killed him.” Rumple says, matter-of-factly. “Actually, I completed ended his existence. No underworld for him.” He adds with a self-satisfied smirk. 

Zelena sneers at him. Before any of them can stop her, she waves her hand in Regina’s direction, but nothing seems to happen, no cloud of green smoke, no flash of light. Nothing. 

Rumple then freezes her with his magic.

“You and I are going to take a little trip together.” He tells her with a menacing look before waving his hand again and the two of them disappearing. 

“I really would not want to be her right now.” Hook says what they’re all thinking. 

“Regina!” Robin rushes to the table where Regina is lying barely conscious, it’s obvious just from looking at her that this has been going on for hours at least. Her eyes are puffy and red from the tears she couldn’t help but shed as the electricity coursed through her body. Her breathing is shallow, and her skin cold and clammy. Robin places his on her cheek, turning her head slightly to look at him, brushing the hair that has stuck to her face out of the way gently. “Regina, you’re going to be ok, we’re here, you’re safe now.” He tells her, stroking her cheek and holding her hand with his other hand. 

Emma and Mary Margaret are disconnecting her from the machine as he talks. Emma sees the magic inhibiting cuff on Regina’s wrist and with a wave of her hand removes it. 

Once they’re done disconnecting Regina from the machinery, Robin scoops her up off the table, cradling her in his arms.

“Emma, we should get her to the hospital.” David tells his daughter, intimating that she should use her magic to do so. 

“Right.” Emma says, unsure, she’s much less confident in using her magic since her dark one days. 

“No.” Comes an extremely weak sounding protest from Regina. “I’m ok.” 

“Clearly.” Hook says sarcastically.

“Regina, you need to go get checked over.” Mary Margaret argues.

“Robin, take me home.” She doesn’t have the strength to keep her eyes open as she speaks and it comes out as more of a plea than she intended. 

Robin can’t help but feel compelled to go along with her wishes, he understands her desire to avoid the hospital, he shares it. As irrational as it is, it will always be the place where they lost their baby girl. With a heavy sigh, he relents. “Alright.” 

The others look at him as if he’s lost his mind, they can’t understand why he’s agreeing to this. Regina may be protesting but she’s in no condition to actually put up a fight. 

Looks are exchanged between the group, an entire silent conversation goes on in fact, Emma gives Robin a look which conveys ‘are you insane?’, and she gets a look of determination in response. She looks to her mother then, who shrugs as if to say ‘it’s up to you.’ 

It’s Emma’s turn to sigh after that, “Fine.” She says, before she furrows her brow in concentration and the group appears in the hallway of Regina’s house. 

“I’m going to take her up to bed.” Robin says, still carrying Regina and moving towards the stairs.

“Wait.” Emma says. “I think I can help.” 

Robin looks at her for moment, she doesn’t sound too sure. He stands frozen, considering what to do for a few seconds before he relents and takes Regina into the living room, carefully laying her down on the sofa. He gently lifts her head, placing a cushion underneath it. She grabs a handful of his shirt as he goes to move away. 

“I’m not going anywhere my love.” He tells her, reconsidering his plan then, he supports her shoulders and gently lifts her upper body up off of the couch before sitting and then resting her head on his lap. 

Emma approaches them then, once Regina seems settled comfortably, holding on to Robin’s hand as if for dear life itself. Emma stands over Regina, holding her hands out over her, eyes closed and brow furrowed in concentration again. She moves her hands up and down and a cloud of magical smoke envelopes Regina for a moment. 

Once it’s gone, Regina takes a deep breath, her breathing changes entirely in fact, much steadier, slower, back to normal almost. Her color is improved as well, not back to normal but certainly healthier than it was. 

“She’ll be ok.” Emma declares, sounding much more confident than she had. “She just needs to rest a while.” 

“Thank you.” Robin says. 

Emma nods in response. 

“We should probably go get the kids, Granny must be having a hell of a time keep Henry put.” David says, since they’re now all standing in the living room awkwardly as Regina sleeps and Robin keeps looking at her like he can’t quite believe she’s there. 

“Good idea.” Mary Margaret agrees. “We can probably hold them off for a couple of hours and then we’ll bring them home?” She says to Robin. 

“I would greatly appreciate that.” Robin replies, torn between his desire to have his children close and the need for Regina to rest. He knows the two are mutually exclusive, she’ll be up and pretending she’s fine as soon as the children are in the house, even if it kills her. 

Mary Margaret, David, Hook and Emma take that as their cue to leave. 

“Call if you need anything.” David tells Robin as they head out the door. 

“I will, thank you.” Robin replies.

They then leave, heading straight to Granny’s. 

 

“Where have you been?” Henry is up like a shot running towards to his mother, grandparents and Hook as soon as they open the door to the diner. “Did you find my mom? Is she ok? What happened?” He fires off question after question without giving them a chance to answer. 

“Whoa!” Emma holds her hands up in mock surrender. “Easy kid, one question at a time.” She says as she walks Henry back over to the booth he’d been sharing with Roland. “Your mom’s ok.” She tells both boys. 

“See.” Henry says to Roland with a smile. “I knew she’d be ok.” He’d been much less sure than he let on of course, but he felt it was an important part of his job as a big brother to reassure Roland. He sits next to Roland and gives him a quick hug. “Can we see her?” He asks, attention turned back to his mother now. 

Emma takes a deeps breath, sliding into the booth opposite them. “Not right away, she needs to rest a while, we’ll take you home this afternoon and you can see her then ok?” 

“This afternoon?” Henry begins to protest. 

“Yes.” Emma says sternly and she can see the moment Henry realizes he’s not going to win.

“What happened?” He asks just as David appears and puts a hot chocolate in front of all three of them, two with cinnamon, one without. Roland’s face lights up at the sight of the mound of cream on top his drink. 

“Your other grandpa kept his word for once.” David says, sitting next to Emma with a coffee for himself. “Hades isn’t going to be a problem anymore and, well, let’s just say I’m glad I’m not Zelena right now.” 

Henry pauses for minute, thinking about what he’s going to say. “I know that I should feel bad but, she killed my dad and my little sister and she hurt my mom.” He says. “Not very heroic of me is it?” 

Emma reaches out and takes her sons hand in her own. “It’s human Henry.” She tells him. “Whatever Gold is doing to her, she most definitely brought it on herself.” 

“I guess.” Henry agrees, somewhat reluctantly. 

Meanwhile across the diner, Mary Margaret is holding Neal, hugging her son close as she always feels the need to do after one or both of them have been in danger. Granny has Lucas in his car seat on the counter, he’s sleeping soundly.

“It was the damndest thing.” Granny says to Mary Margaret. “From the moment they all appeared that child just would not settle and then all of a sudden, he’s out like a light sleeping soundly.” 

Mary Margaret smiles knowingly. “I bet it was right around the time we got to Regina.” She says.

“What are you talking about?” Granny asks with a frown. 

“I don’t know exactly.” Mary Margaret replies, still smiling. “But it seems like somehow, Lucas knows when his mom is in trouble.”

“How is that even possible?” Granny asks, disbelievingly. 

“I have no idea.” Mary Margaret admits. “I guess it’s to do with whatever magic he has.” She says with a shrug. “Roland seems connected Lucas somehow too, I don’t understand it but I’ve seen much stranger things.” She says with a shrug. 

“Well then, I guess if he’s sleeping it’s good sign for Regina.” Granny says. “How was she?” She asks. She’s at a loss to explain how she came to care so deeply for the woman she used to despise so much, but she’s passed the point of trying to hide it anymore. 

“She looked awful when we found her.” Mary Margaret admits. “Maybe even a little worse than the first time.” 

“The first time?” Granny asks.

“Yeah, the exact same thing happened with Greg Mendell, Zelena must have known somehow and copied what he did.” Mary Margaret says, thinking out loud. “Emma used magic to help heal her though, she looked much better when we left, I think she just needs rest.” 

Granny shakes her head. “Nothing is ever easy for that girl.” 

“You have no idea.” Mary Margaret says with a rueful smile but she doesn’t say anymore, knowing how fiercely private Regina is. 

 

They make it to mid-afternoon before they reach a point where Henry is about to sneak off home himself and they relent, taking the boys home to see their parents. 

“Now, your mom’s probably still sleeping so you need to be quiet ok?” Mary Margaret tells both Henry and Roland as opens the door to the house. 

They both rush into the house anyway, followed by Mary Margaret and David, who’s carrying Lucas in his car seat. 

Emma is babysitting Neal and Hook had unsurprisingly volunteered to help her. 

“Guys!” David says in a loud whisper. “Quietly, remember.” 

They all turn their attention to the living room, where Robin and Regina are on the couch where they’d left them in. Regina sleeping soundly, turned on her side now, head still resting comfortably on Robin’s laps. Robin’s asleep too, but he wakes with the noise of them entering the room. 

He smiles in greeting, and once again very gently moves Regina and replaces his lap with a cushion as he stands up. 

He hugs both Henry and Roland before picking Lucas up out of his car seat and cradling his youngest son in his arms. He hates being separated from them. 

“We should let your mother rest.” He whispers to his boys, gently ushering them out of the room toward the kitchen. 

“When’s mama going to wake up?” Roland asks when they get to the kitchen. 

“When she’s ready to my boy.” Robin replies. “She’s not feeling very well right now and she needs to sleep to help heal.” Robin explains as best he can. 

“That’s how it was before.” David agrees.

“Roland, why don’t you go upstairs and watch some tv?” Mary Margaret says, but they all, Roland included, know it’s not really a question. “Henry, you too.” 

Henry wants to argue, to tell them he’s not a kid anymore, but he thinks the better of it. “Ok.” He says reluctantly before disappearing out of the room with Roland.

“I can’t believe we’re just casually talking about the last time Regina was tortured with repeated electrocution.” Mary Margaret says once the boys are out of earshot. 

“What?” Robin asks, still in the dark. 

David and Mary Margaret quickly explain about Greg Mendell, Peter Pan and how they’d found Regina in a similar condition before. 

Robin shakes his head in disbelief. “To have such hatred in you for your own flesh and blood…” 

Mary Margaret and David don’t say anything.

“I should probably go and check on the boys.” Robin says, moving towards the hallway. 

He doesn’t get as far as the stairs before he sees a sight that doesn’t really surprise him.   
Roland has climbed onto the couch, tucking himself in under Regina’s arm and being held tightly against her. Henry is on the floor in front of them, as close as he can possibly be. Both are fast asleep, exhausted from not having slept properly the night before.

Robin smiles despite himself, he should have known as much. As he stands watching them, Lucas stirs in his arms and lets out and an almighty cry before he can get him out of the room. 

Regina’s awake in an instant. 

Robin comforts his son and settles him, then looks at Regina who smiles tiredly. She kisses Roland’s head, then carefully extricates herself from his grip and manages to slowly get up from the couch without waking either boy. 

She follows Robin towards the kitchen, but she’s walking slowly and it’s obvious she’s still in some pain. 

“Regina!” Mary Margaret looks up, surprised to see her and rushes towards her to hug her.

Regina smiles tightly in response, still not quite used to such a reaction from Mary Margaret. 

“I’m so glad you’re ok.” Mary Margaret tells her as she pulls back from the hug. 

Regina looks at her oddly. Images are flashing through her mind and she can’t seem to stop them. She shakes her head in a vain attempt to clear her thoughts, but whatever is happening is getting stronger. 

“Regina?” Mary Margaret looks at her, concerned. 

“Regina what’s wrong?” Robin asks, rushing to her side.

Regina can’t answer. She can’t even see them now, all she can see is images from the past. She brings a hand up to her forehead where it feels like a hot iron has been shoved into her skull. She blinks repeatedly, trying anything make this stop. 

Robin, David and Mary Margaret are all looking at her, concerned, David has moved closer now too. All of a sudden, Regina drops to the floor. Robin’s instinct is to catch her but he still has his baby son in his arms, so it’s up to David who just manages to catch her in time to stop her head hitting off the floor. He gently lowers her the rest of the way to floor. 

“Regina!” Robin and Mary Margaret are distressed and calling her name repeatedly, but now kneeling on the floor next to her and David. 

“Regina!” They shake her gently at first but then harder as they grow more frantic, there’s no response, at all.


	31. Chapter 31

“What the hell happened?” Emma asks as she enters the room in the hospital when Regina is now in a bed. 

Regina is totally unresponsive, but every so often, she whimpers, or her face contorts in pain, or she cries, there have been few words too. It’s obvious to everyone that even in her slumber she’s being tormented by nightmares.

“We don’t know, one minute she was fine and talking to us, the next…this.” David says, waving his hand in the direction of Regina’s prone form as he speaks. 

“This has to have been Zelena.” Emma says. 

“How?” Robin asks, he’s sitting in a chair next to the bed, gripping Regina’s hand, it’s an uncomfortably familiar position for him. 

“I don’t know, whatever she did before Gold froze her, she’s done something to Regina.” Emma says. “A sleeping curse maybe?”

“This isn’t like any sleeping curse I’ve seen. People tend to sleep with them, peacefully, whatever this is, it seems like it’s deliberately designed to torment her.” David says, and he does have a fair amount of experience with sleeping curses. 

“Well that’s another sign Zelena’s to blame surely?” Emma says. 

“We should get Blue, maybe she can help.” Mary Margaret says.

“You know how Regina feels about the fairies.” Robin says.

“Yes, and how they feel about her, but Blue’s helped her before and she will again if I ask.” Mary Margaret says. 

“If you think it’s best.” Robin says reluctantly. 

“I don’t know what else to do…” Mary Margaret says with an undertone of desperation. “We don’t even know where Gold is.”

“Would we even trust him to help?” Emma asks. 

“I don’t think we’re going to have a lot of choice about this.” David says grimly. 

“I’m going to go and get Blue, she might at the very least be able to tell us what’s going on.” Mary Margaret says leaving the room in a hurry, David going with her. 

“I’ll be back shortly.” Hook says, backing out of the room as well leaving Emma confused.

Regina’s face contorts into a pained expression and she lets out a cry. 

“What is that?” Emma asks, blinking a few times to make sure she wasn’t imagining it.

“What?” Robin asks, he’s on the opposite side from where Emma is looking and can’t see what she can. 

Emma approaches Regina and pulls up the sleeve of her hospital gown to reveal a bruise on her arm, one that had just appeared in front of her eyes. That wasn’t the most disturbing part though, it was the shape of the bruise, it was very clearly the impression left by four fingers gripping too hard and Emma was willing to bet if she lifted the arm there would be a thumb print too. Robin, who’s stood up now to see what Emma is looking at looks at her in alarm before he pulls up the other sleeve to reveal a matching bruise on that arm. 

“Whatever’s going on, it’s getting worse.” He says.

 

Mary Margaret and David return a short while later with Blue in tow, the fairy reluctantly convinced to help by Mary Margaret’s pleading. 

Even from the other side of the room, she can feel this is no ordinary sleeping curse. She approaches the bed cautiously, waving her wand over Regina.

“I’ve only ever heard of this, I’ve never seen it before.” She says and none of them miss that there’s an undercurrent of awe in her tone. 

“What is it?” Robin asks. 

“It’s a sleeping curse of sorts.” Blue says.

“If it’s a sleeping curse why didn’t Robin’s kiss wake her?” David asks.

“Because this is no ordinary sleeping curse.” Blue explains. “As you know, normally with a sleeping curse, you’re sent to a netherworld while your body slumbers, some people are even able to be aware of what’s going on around them while they’re sleeping.” She says. “This, this is different. She’s trapped in her own mind, reliving memories and none of them are pleasant.” 

“I don’t understand.” Mary Margaret says. “Why wouldn’t true love’s kiss wake her from that.” 

“Her mind is literally living through these memories again, whatever it is she’s remembering, she can’t remember anything else except what she knew at that time. It’s almost as though she’s gone back in time, true love’s kiss can’t work if she doesn’t remember loving Robin.” Blue explains, looking sadly at Robin. 

“So what can we do?” Robin asks desperately. 

“There’s nothing that can be done.” She says. 

“Now that’s not entirely true is it dearie?” Rumple appears in the doorway, Hook loitering behind him. He’d gone to find him Emma realizes. 

“What do you mean? Can you wake her?” David asks. 

“No, I can’t.” He says enigmatically. “But there is one way to help her.” 

“What is it?” Robin asks. 

“I can send someone into her dreams.” Rumple says with a dramatic flair of his hands. 

“That’s insane!” Blue protests. 

“If she can be reasoned with, the memory spell can be broken and then it’s a simple matter of true love’s kiss to wake her.” Rumple explains.

“Let’s do it then.” Robin says, volunteering. 

“It’s not quite as simple as that.” Blue warns.

“What do you mean?” David asks.

“Reasoning with someone within their own mind is no simple task, especially while they’re in the midst of reliving their worst memories. For anyone, this would be a difficult thing to do, but the Evil Queen has so many horrific things within her mind, I doubt anyone will be able to break through to her.” Blue says.

“I have to try!” Robin protests.

“If you’re unsuccessful, you’ll be trapped with her.” Blue warns. 

“Yes, yes, there’s that minor detail.” Rumple admits. 

“I don’t care, I have to try.” Robin says. 

“Fine.” Rumple is happy to begin.

“Wait.” Mary Margaret stops them. “Robin, maybe it shouldn’t be you.” 

“What are you talking about?” He asks. “Of course it should be me.”

“If it doesn’t work…that would leave Lucas and Roland without their mother and their father.” She says. 

Robin pauses, he hates to admit it but she does have a point. “It will work.” He says determinedly. 

“I wouldn’t be so sure.” Blue warns. 

“I’ll do it.” Mary Margaret says. 

“What?” David asks, shocked. 

“Mom?” Emma is surprised too. 

“David, think about it, if something happens to me, Neal has you.” Mary Margaret reasons. 

David pulls her into the hallway for some privacy.

“You don’t have to do this.” He says.

“I know that. I want to.” She explains.

“You don’t owe her anything.” David says, it’s not meant with cruelty.

“You and I both know that’s not exactly true but that’s not why I’m doing this David. The truth is, I suspect I’m involved in a lot of what she’s remembering, I’m probably better equipped to deal with her like that than Robin is.” She reasons.

“You heard what Blue said, she’s reliving those times, who’s to say she doesn’t just kill you on sight? What would happen if she killed you in there?” He’s afraid for his wife.

“She won’t.” Mary Margaret is sure of that somehow. “I know I can get through to her.” 

“I’ve heard you say that before.” David says ruefully. 

“That was a long time ago, this is different. She’s different. No curse is stronger than true love and we both know she truly loves her children, she won’t have forgotten them, not entirely.” Mary Margaret is determined.

“You’re going to this do no matter what I say aren’t you.” David can tell he’s not talking her out of this. 

“I’d rather go into it with your blessing though.” She says with a smile. 

“Fine, but if you don’t wake up I’m coming after you.” He warns. 

“Deal.” She says with a smile, both of them walking back into the room. 

“Robin, I’ll do it.” Mary Margaret tells him. 

“I can’t ask you to do that.” He protests.

“You didn’t, I’m volunteering.” She argues. “You can’t risk leaving your children orphans, besides you need to be here to wake Regina up once I get through to her.” 

“Can we get on with this?” Rumple asks impatiently. 

“Are you sure about this?” Robin asks.

“Yes.” Mary Margaret says resolutely. 

He nods then, reluctantly agreeing. 

“I suggest we get another bed for this.” Rumple says, shooing people out of the way and using his magic to make another bed appear in the space he created. He gestures towards it indicating Mary Margaret should lie down. 

He stands between the two beds then, one hand on Regina’s forehead, the other on Mary Margaret’s. He closes his eyes in concentration and Mary Margaret loses consciousness. 

“There, it’s done. It’s up to her now.” He declares.


	32. Chapter 32

Mary Margaret’s disoriented when she realizes she’s standing in her childhood home all of a sudden. It takes a moment before she remembers what’s happened. She’s not really here, and this is not her childhood home. It’s the same building, but it’s darker somehow, this is the Evil Queen’s castle. She looks around, there’s a chaise with white fur to the right of the balcony, candles burn on either side of the opening. Before she has a chance to look any further she hears footsteps approaching. Her first instinct is to hide as Regina, no she corrects herself, the Evil Queen stalks toward the room where Mary Margaret stands. She can hear Sydney, the magic mirror here asking her questions, but she doesn’t answer and her steps don’t falter. Henry appears in the room quickly, lighting the candles nervously before his daughter gets there. He doesn’t react to Mary Margaret at all, instead approaching his daughter as she enters the room. 

“Did Rumplestiltskin tell you what you needed to know?” He asks as she enters.

Mary Margaret presses herself as far back against the wall as she can ending up in the shadows at the left side of the balcony but it only takes a second for her to see that she needn’t bother, the Queen doesn’t see her and obviously neither does her father.

“Yes.” She answers still stalking through the room.

“And?” Henry asks, turning to follow her. 

“I’m not sure I should say.” Regina answers, and Mary Margaret can see the pained expression on her face that her father cannot. “I’m conflicted.”

A horrible feeling washes over Mary Margaret as she recognizes what this is and what’s about to happen. 

“How bad is it?” Henry asks. “Maybe I can help?” He offers as Regina walks to the other side of the room and he follows.

Mary Margaret winces, this is the man she remembers, kind and willing to do anything for his daughter. 

“I have to cut out the heart of the thing I love most.” She says it with her back to her father and Mary Margaret. 

“Me.” Henry sounds almost resigned to the idea.

The Queen turns to face her father and over his shoulder Mary Margaret can see her face. 

“Daddy I don’t know what to do.” She says.

“My dear, please, you don’t have to do this.” He pleads, taking a step towards her. 

“I have to do something.” She says, walking passed him back towards the balcony, she looks to the side, right at Mary Margaret and for a moment her heart stops, thinking she’s about to be discovered but then the Queen continues on.

“Then move passed this. I know this may sound self-serving but you don’t need to enact the curse.” Henry’s pleading with his daughter and Mary Margaret knew the man enough to know that this isn’t him pleading for his life, he’s pleading for Regina’s.

“But I can’t keep living like this. What Snow did to me, what she took from me…it’s eating me alive Daddy. Her very existence mocks me, she must be punished.” The pain in the Queen’s voice as she speaks is like a slap to Mary Margaret. It’s not as though she didn’t know how the Evil Queen felt about her, but to see it up close once again, the pain and suffering of this woman and what she channelled it into, what she let herself become as a result, it’s horrifying.

“But, if the price is a hole that will never be filled, why do it? Stop worrying about Snow White and start over, we can have a new life.” Henry continues his pleas, it’s heart breaking for Mary Margaret to listen to when she knows the outcome. Regina’s walked off again, has her back to him until he finishes speaking and then she turns.

“What kind of life? All I’ve worked for, all I’ve built will be gone, my power will disappear. They already think I’m nothing.”

“Power is seductive, but so is love, you can have that again.” Henry makes a promise he’ll never get to fulfil. 

Mary Margaret watches as the Queen steps forward into her father’s embrace.

“I just want to be happy.” She says quietly, a tear falling. 

“You can be, of this I’m sure. I believe given the chance we can find happiness, together, but the choice is yours.” Henry holds his daughter.

Mary Margaret can see the Queen’s face. Can see in all of its horrific glory the moment she makes the decision and her expression changes. 

“I think you’re right. I can be happy. Just not here.” She says, moving so she can look him in the eye as she reaches into his chest and takes his heart. “I’m sorry.” She whispers after he’s collapsed to the ground. 

It’s at that moment that Mary Margaret comes to appreciate the difference between knowing something happened and witnessing it. She looks on in anguish as the Evil Queen stands over her father’s body crying, holding his heart in her hand. “Oh Regina.” She whispers, full of sorrow.

Suddenly she looks up, straight at Mary Margaret. “You!” She says, full of rage. “How did you get in here?” 

“Regina listen to me, this isn’t real, you’re in the hospital in Storybrooke, you have to remember.” Mary Margaret says.

“What the hell is Storybrooke? Have you finally lost your tiny mind?” The Queen sneers. 

“Regina, you have to fight this.” Mary Margaret is pleading with her now. 

“No, I have to kill you!” She lunges forward but just as she does the whole room changes and Mary Margaret finds herself in stables. This isn’t the enchanted forest however, it’s  
most definitely Storybrooke. The horses are disturbed by something and then suddenly David and Regina run in. 

“Daniel!” Regina shouts into one of the stalls. “Let him go!”

She stands there frozen as David pushes passed her and pulls Henry out, walking towards where Mary Margaret is standing, once again they don’t react to her presence. 

“You ok?” David asks Henry. 

“Yeah.” The boy nods. 

“Go!” David tells him. “Go!” 

Henry’s off and running out of the stable, David turns back to Regina

“It’s true.” Regina’s still staring into the stall. “You’re really here.” 

David suddenly shoves Regina to the side and shuts the door to the stall just as Daniel charges at it, David then holds it shut as Daniel pushes from inside. 

“It won’t hold for long can you cast a spell to subdue him?” He asks Regina as he struggles with the door. 

“No I won’t use magic on him.” Regina’s repulsed by the suggestion.

David pulls his gun then. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” Regina asks him, grabbing his arm, panicked by his actions. 

“He’s a monster Regina! If you won’t put him down I will!” David shouts. 

“David please!” Regina begs. “Just let me talk to him.” 

“It’s too big of a risk, there’s no telling what he’ll do.” David refuses.

“You have to at least give me a chance!” Regina argues.

“Out of the way Regina, now!” David violently shoves her aside again.

Mary Margaret is in shock at the scene, David had told her about this incident but his description was very different to what she was seeing. 

“No I won’t let you hurt him!” Regina grabs at David. “He’ll listen to me!” 

Mary Margaret knows Regina could have snapped David’s neck in an instant but instead she pleads with him. 

“Please! Let me talk to my fiancé.” 

The banging on the door stops and David stands back from it. 

“Fine.” He relents. “But I’m waiting outside and if he so much as steps one foot toward the door I’m shooting him.” He tells her, walking out from the stables and leaving Regina alone with Daniel. 

Regina stands for a moment, takes a deep breath and then pulls the lock back and opens the door to reveal Daniel standing awkwardly at the back of the stall. Mary Margaret has moved so she can see into it, curiosity getting the better of her. He’s a shadow of the man she remembers. 

Daniel’s hand reaches out and for a moment Mary Margaret thinks he’s going to caress Regina’s face, but then his face contorts and he’s throttling her, grabbing her by the throat, throwing her round into the wall.

“Daniel!” Regina gasps. 

Mary Margaret fights the instinct to go and help her knowing it would be useless to try and change the memories, or worse still, that it might not be, who knows what sort of damage her interfering in Regina’s memories could do. 

“Please stop. It’s me, I love you.” Regina manages to croak out the words. 

Daniel seems to come to his senses and releases his hold on Regina who coughs and splutters for a moment. 

“Regina.” Daniel reaches out for her and she goes to him. 

“Daniel.” She says as they embrace. 

“I can’t believe it’s really you.” Regina says.

Daniel winces in pain, stepping back from her. 

“Daniel?” She asks.

“Just stop the pain.” He begs. 

“How?” Regina asks and she involuntarily flinches when his hands reach up to her neck again. 

“Let me go.” Daniel tells her. 

“No. No, I won’t lose you again.” Regina cries. “Without you I’m lost.” 

Mary Margaret realizes she’s crying, this is truly awful to watch. 

Daniel winces again and Regina holds his face.

“Daniel! Daniel come back to me!” She fights to keep him in the moment. 

“Can’t. I can’t.” He tells her, a look of fear in his eyes.

“I love you.” Regina whispers.

“Then love again.” Daniel tells her solemnly before backing away in agony. 

Something in him changes as he stands and he lunges toward her to attack again, Regina puts her left hand up to stop him and magical barrier appears between them.  
Regina sobs, then waves her right hand in front of Daniel and he turns to ashes. 

“Goodbye Daniel.” She says. 

Regina stands motionless for a beat before she can contain it no longer and tears stream down her face along with gut-wrenching sobs. 

“Regina.” Mary Margaret knows she’s intruding. 

“Leave me alone.” Regina snaps. 

“Regina, I can’t, you have to listen to me, this isn’t real.” Mary Margaret desperately tries to get through to her. 

“Go away!” Regina shouts. 

Before she can argue any more she finds herself standing in the back of Gold’s shop watching as Regina put her mother’s heart back in her chest and inadvertently killed her. It was an odd feeling to see herself running in too late to stop what she had put in motion. She tried to talk to Regina once that had played out but it was as though she couldn’t see her. Then they were back in the enchanted forest, to the moment Cora ripped out Daniel’s heart, a pivotal moment in both their lives, once again though, it seemed like Regina couldn’t see or hear her. After that they were in Neverland and she watched as Henry lay motionless, his heart in Peter Pan’s chest, it was less hard to watch the memories she knew turned out ok in the end. It was disconcerting however, the jumble of the memories, jumping from place to place and different times in Regina’s life. The next awful moment to be relived was when Regina woke up in the hospital and Robin had to tell her they’d lost their baby. Mary Margaret was crying again through that one, but once again Regina seemed unable to see or hear her. 

She knows she shouldn’t be shocked when her father appears, but she can’t help it, she has such a different picture of him in her mind when she thinks back. 

A young Regina is sitting on her bed and it takes a moment for Mary Margaret to recognize that she’s in her wedding dress. A feeling of dread washes over Mary Margaret as what this memory is becomes obvious. Her father stands at the door, looking at Regina where she sits on the bed. 

“Come here my dear.” He says gently.

Regina doesn’t move.

“Your king and husband just gave you an order. Come here. Now.” Leopold says with a coldness to his voice that Mary Margaret had never heard until she met him in the underworld. 

Regina approaches him nervously and Mary Margaret can see she’s shaking. 

Leopold reaches out and caresses her face and she can tell it’s taking everything Regina’s got not to flinch from his touch. 

“So beautiful.” He says. 

Seeing her now, Mary Margaret can see how young Regina was, barely older than her. She feels nauseous at the thought of what’s about to happen. She can’t watch this. She makes for the door but when she opens it, there’s nothing there, just blackness. She’s trapped in the memory just like Regina. She moves to the furthest corner of the room and sits on the floor, knees drawn up to her chest and hands clamped over her ears. She can’t see this and she can’t hear it, it’s too much. She sits there, rocking back and forth staring at the wall, humming to herself until she sees her father leave. She takes her hands away from her ears then and the room is filled with the sound of Regina quietly sobbing into her pillow. Mary Margaret’s heart breaks all over again. Tears are streaming down her face and she wipes them away, praying for this memory to be over quickly.  
She loses count of how many more awful scenes in Regina’s life she witnesses, including how she got that scar on her lip courtesy of her mother, before Mary Margaret finds herself in the Evil Queen’s chambers again, watching as a forlorn looking Queen stirs a drink, within seconds someone is approaching. Mary Margaret recoils when she sees it’s Cora. 

“So, how did it go?” Cora asks as she enters.

Judging from the look on the queen’s face, not well, Mary Margaret surmises. 

“He’s not still here is he?” Cora asks.

“Oh, but he is.” Regina answers and a flick of her hand towards the mirror reveals a man hanging upside down, flames licking up towards him. “He wanted to see the dungeon.” 

“Oh for heaven’s sake, you’re having a tantrum.” Cora gets rid of the image. “There, he’s home now poor thing.” 

“Why’d you let him go? Don’t you want someone else to suffer for what you did?” Regina asks her mother. “Like usual.” She adds. 

Mary Margaret flinches, she’d had no idea the Evil Queen was actually this self-aware. 

“I don’t understand, I thought you were getting along.” Cora says. 

Mary Margaret frowns as she realizes this is something she has absolutely no knowledge of, and while it sounds for all intents and purposes like a conversation about a bad date,  
the fact that it’s in amongst these other memories suggests something awful is about to transpire.

“Well, I haven’t known a lot of love in my life but I do know that’s not what a soul mate feels like.” Regina says in an accusatory tone. 

“Your so called ‘Soul Mate’ is a married, moralizing sap.” Cora says with a smirk. 

Mary Margaret frowns, she can’t possibly be talking about Robin can she?

“The one I found is much better.” Cora says. 

“You were never interested in my happiness.” Regina sounds resigned to the fact. 

“You’ll never be happy, you don’t know how.” Cora answers.

“Whose fault is that?” Mary Margaret mutters to herself. 

“But you do understand power.” Cora continues. “And you’re about to lose it, your people want Snow With to be Queen and unless you start building a dynasty she’ll take back the kingdom and you’ll lose it all.” 

“And when I die of a mysterious illness you’re the power behind the child sized throne, right?” Regina accuses. “Well guess what mother, I found a way to keep that from ever happening.” She holds up the glass she’s been holding onto since the conversation began. 

“What is that?” Cora asks. 

“A potion, to take away your future claim on the royal line.” Regina explains. 

“But you’re not pregnant.” Cora shakes her head, she doesn’t know what’s happening and it clearly disconcerts her. 

“And now I never will be. I won’t be a baby mill for you mother.” 

“You’d never do that, this is a sham.” Cora says self-assuredly. 

“Is it? You made it clear you don’t think anyone’s going to love me, so why not make it official? After all, love is weakness.” Regina spits back the words her mother taught her.

“I was wrong about that, the man, I really thought he was a good match, I’m very sorry.” Cora almost sounds sincere. “Now, we both know you’re not going to drink that so put it down and we can fix this.”

Mary Margaret can see the moment Cora makes the mistake. It’s like a challenge to tell Regina she’s not going to do something. It dawns on Mary Margaret what’s about to happen, no wonder Regina had been so shocked that she was pregnant. 

“You don’t think I’m strong enough to do this?” Regina asks. 

“Stupid girl. You think it’ll make you strong to hurt yourself?” Cora scolds.

And there it is, like a red rag to a bull Mary Margaret thinks as she watches. 

“Oh it does if it hurts you more.” Regina says and gulps the potion. 

Something happens almost instantly and Regina sits down. 

“No, no.” Cora rushes towards her daughter. 

“Get the hell out of my life!” Regina screams. 

“Oh Regina.” Cora says as Regina cries out in pain. “I really did come here to help you, I love you, I wanted you to have a child for your own sake. If I wanted to take your power, I’d  
find a much more direct way. Now please take one last piece of motherly advice, I hope you learn what it’s taken me a lifetime to realize about myself, the only one standing in the way of your happiness is you.”

“Go back to Wonderland mother! I don’t need you!” Regina shouts after her mother before doubling over in pain again. 

“Oh Regina what did you do to yourself?” Mary Margaret says, not expecting an answer. 

“You!” Regina growls looking right at her. “How did you-“ She cries out in pain again.

Mary Margaret can’t resist the instinct to run towards her and does her best to catch Regina as she falls to the floor, clutching at her stomach. 

“It’ll be ok.” She tries to reassure her. “Regina, you have to listen to me, this isn’t real. You’ve got to remember Storybrooke, your children and Robin are waiting on you.”

It’s no use Mary Margaret can see, Regina’s in too much pain to listen, but if nothing else it seems like the rules of this are clearer, she can interact with Regina if she’s on her own in a memory it appears but not if there are others around. She’s not sure how long she sits on the ground, holding and comforting the woman who at this point in her life was her mortal enemy but one minute she’s there, and the next she’s watching a younger version of herself approach Regina’s bed. 

She can vaguely recall this, but she can’t think of anything significant happening.

The young Snow White cautiously approaches the bed.

“Regina, are you awake?” She asks. 

Mary Margaret moves so she can see Regina who lying facing the large window in the room, staring blankly toward it. 

“Johanna said you weren’t feeling well, I wanted to see if you needed anything?” Snow says, sitting on the bed. “What’s that?” Snow asks, seeing Regina gripping onto something. 

“Mr Bunny!” Snow says excitedly, grabbing the stuffed toy out from Regina’s hands. 

Her younger self couldn’t or wouldn’t see it, but Mary Margaret can see Regina’s expression change, a hardness coming over her face. It’s almost imperceptible but not to  
someone who knows her so well. Mary Margaret has no idea what it is that just happened, but something most definitely did just happen. 

“I’ve been looking everywhere for him!” Snow excitedly prattles on and Mary Margaret winces at her younger self’s behaviour, so self-absorbed. “Well, anyway, I just wanted to  
check on you, I hope you feel better soon.” Snow says, hopping off the bed, she turns and kisses her step-mothers forehead before bounding out of the room. 

“Regina.” Mary Margaret moves into Regina’s line of sight. 

It takes a moment but she looks at Mary Margaret and frowns.

“Who are you?” Regina asks.

“It’s me, Mary Mar-“ She stops herself. “It’s Snow.” She says, moving closer.

“That’s not possible.” Regina says, brow furrowed in confusion. 

“Regina, this isn’t real, you’re trapped in your memories.” Mary Margaret says, kneeling at the side of the bed so she’s at eye level with Regina who still hasn’t lifted her head from  
the pillow. 

Regina reaches out and touches Mary Margaret’s face.

“You look just like her.” She says.

“I am her, just older.” Mary Margaret replies. 

“I don’t understand.” Regina shakes her head.

“You have to remember Regina. You have to fight to get back to your family.” Mary Margaret encourages her. 

“What are you talking about?” She asks.

“Robin and your boys are waiting. Henry and Roland and Lucas, they need their mother, you have to fight for them Regina.” Mary Margaret says.

“My boys?” Regina’s eyes fill with tears as she considers the possibility. “No, this is some cruel joke.” 

“No, it isn’t. Look at me, you have to remember, it’s the only way to get back to them.” Mary Margaret tells her determinedly. 

“I don’t know how.” Regina looks lost and frightened, two words Mary Margaret rarely associates with her. 

Mary Margaret reaches out and takes Regina’s hand in her own.

“I know you and I told you once before that you feel things deeply with your whole soul and I know that goes doubly for how you love your children. There is not a curse in  
existence that could make you completely forget how much, how fiercely you love your children Regina, it’s a true love and you taught me that true love is the strongest magic of  
all.” She tell her earnestly.

Tears flow down Regina’s face now despite her trying to blink them back. 

“Henry.” She says, as if she’s trying out the name. “Henry.” She’s more forceful this time. “My Henry.” She says with a smile as her memories start to come rushing back to her. “My  
little Roland and Lucas. I remember Mary Margaret.” She grips the younger woman’s hand tightly in her own. “How could I ever forget them?” 

“I don’t think you were given a lot of choice in the matter.” Mary Margaret says with a smile. “Robin’s waiting for you, he should be able to break the curse now.” 

“Robin.” Regina says with a smile, memories washing over her. 

Suddenly, she’s looking up him and he’s standing over her grinning widely.


	33. Chapter 33

Robin and David are slumped in chairs next to Regina and Mary Margaret’s beds on opposite sides of the room. They’ve been there for the three days that this has been going on. They’re both exhausted and have passed out into an uneasy sleep. 

David suddenly wakes, and frowns when he sees Mary Margaret and Regina are holding hands. 

“Robin.” He says, trying to wake the other man, he doesn’t stir. “Robin! Wake up!” He says, louder this time. 

“Wha? What?” Robin is disorientated for a moment but then he sees it too. Both men are on their feet now.

“Something’s happening.” David says. 

“They’re smiling.” Robin says, frowning in confusion. 

“Robin.” It’s Regina who speaks, as she has been doing occasionally in her slumber. 

“Now!” David says. “Wake her up!” 

Robin leans over and places a gentle kiss on Regina’s lips. It feels to him like a lifetime passes but in reality it’s only a few seconds before her eyelids flutter open and she looks up him. 

“Welcome back.” Robin grins. 

Regina smiles back, but then suddenly her head turns towards Mary Margaret, she breathes a sigh of relief when she sees the other woman looking back at her, she’s awake too, they smile at each other.

“Thank you.” Regina says and Mary Margaret nods in acknowledgement then after a gentle squeeze, they let go of each other’s hands. 

“How long?” Regina asks, turning her attention back to Robin. 

“Three days.” Robin answers with a dopey smile on his face, he’s so relieved to see her beautiful eyes open again. 

Regina sighs, three days stolen away from her family. 

“Take me home.” She says. 

“Regina, you’ve been unconscious for days, we should really let the doctors look at you.” Robin argues but it’s half-hearted, he knows when her mind is made up. 

“Take me home.” She repeats. 

On the other side of the room, a similar conversation is playing out, both mothers desperately wanting to be reunited with their children. 

“Everyone’s at Regina’s place waiting for word.” David tells Mary Margaret. 

Upon hearing this, both women look at each other and after a nod from Mary Margaret, Regina uses her magic to transport them all there. 

“Mom!” Is cried out in unison by Henry and Emma, aimed at different people of course. They each launch themselves towards their respective mothers.

Roland, who was asleep on the sofa wakes up on hearing this and barrels towards Regina too.

“Mama, I missed you!” He says. 

Regina sits down, feeling slightly dizzy on her feet after being unconscious for three days, she takes Henry and Roland with her, one at either side cuddling into her. 

Mary Margaret is hugging Emma with one arm and has Neal in the other, holding both her children tightly. 

Granny appears then with Lucas and gently places him in his mother’s arms. 

“He missed you too.” She says gruffly, she had dealt with the baby while Robin sat vigil at Regina’s bedside and as usual when Regina was in trouble, he would not be settled. 

“Thank you.” Regina says sincerely. 

Granny just nods.

“Glad to see you awake again.” She says. “I imagine you two have the quite an appetite, I’ll make you something to eat.” 

“Oh, you don’t have to do that.” Regina begins to protest, she can imagine that Granny has spent a lot of time looking after Lucas the past few days, she doesn’t want to put her out any more than she already has been.

“I know I don’t, I want to.” Granny says with a smile. 

Regina sits contentedly with Henry and Roland at either side and Lucas in her arms sleeping soundly. Robin approaches from behind the couch and puts a hand on her shoulder and it doesn’t go unnoticed by anyone that Regina nearly jumps out of her skin. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.” Robin says, eyes full of concern. 

“It’s okay.” She says with a smile.

“Dinner’s ready.” He says, studying her as he speaks. 

“Let’s go then.” Regina says with a forced smile, standing and ignoring the concerned glances from Henry, Emma, David and Mary Margaret. 

“We’ll be right there.” David says, holding Mary Margaret back. Once they’re alone he hugs once again, careful of Neal who she’s still holding. “Are you ok?” 

“Yes.” She replies, but she sounds unsure. 

“How was it?” He asks, knowing it’s a stupid question.

“Awful.” She replies honestly. “David the things I saw…and the worst part is that wasn’t even everything. The things she’s been through David.” Mary Margaret can’t even comprehend the scale of what she saw, and what she didn’t. 

“It’s over now.” David tries to reassure her.

“Maybe.” She says absentmindedly.

“What does that mean?” He asks, alarmed.

“Nothing.” She shakes her head. “Let’s go, I am starving.” 

There’s jovial chatter as they all eat the feast that Granny’s somehow managed to prepare in a short time. Regina’s quiet, hardly joining in and Mary Margaret is watching her closely, as is everyone else despite their best efforts not to. 

By the time they’re finished eating, Lucas is sleeping soundly in his car seat, Roland’s head is lolling about as he desperately tries to fight off sleep and Henry’s yawning every few minutes despite his best efforts to hide it. 

“All right, it’s getting late I think we need to these young gentlemen to bed.” Robin says, bringing the conversation to an end. 

“I’m not tired!” Roland protests despite his ongoing struggle to keep his eyes open. 

“Of course you’re not, come on my boy.” Robin laughs, picking his son up. He stops at Regina so can Roland can say goodnight and get a goodnight kiss, Henry does the same thing with both his moms and then follows Robin upstairs. 

“I’ll put this one up in his cot.” Granny says, lifting the car seat and heading upstairs before Regina can protest. 

Mary Margaret looks at Emma and David. 

“And I will…go tell Hook the good news that you’re awake.” Emma says awkwardly making an excuse to leave.

“And I guess I’ll take Neal home.” David says, following suit. 

Regina and Mary Margaret sit in silence few minutes before Mary Margaret can’t take it anymore. 

“We’re going to have to talk about this.” She says. 

“No. We really aren’t.” Regina counters. 

“Regina.” Mary Margaret opens her mouth to start arguing but is cut off.

“I appreciate what you did for me more than you know.” Regina says. “You saved me from that endless nightmare and brought me back to my family, you are my family Snow.” She says. 

The use of her other name startles Mary Margaret for a moment. 

“But everything you saw was in the past and none of it needs to be dredged up again.” Regina continues, but there’s a desperation in her voice. “Please. Let it be.” 

There’s another silence between them as Mary Margaret thinks over what she’s said. 

“I wish I could.” Mary Margaret says.

Regina sighs in frustration.

“But there’s two things I can’t ignore. One I need to know and one you need to know.” She continues.

Regina frowns, that wasn’t what she was expecting at all. 

“I need to know what that last memory was, why was that in amongst all those other horrific things? I don’t understand, what did I do?” Mary Margaret asks.

Regina’s eyes well up with tears again and she looks pleadingly at Mary Margaret. 

“I can’t.” She shakes her head. 

“Regina please, if I did something...” Mary Margaret makes her own plea.

“It’s not your fault, you couldn’t remember.” Regina admits quietly.

“What?” It takes a minute for Mary Margaret to realize what she’s saying. “It has to do with the memories you took from me?” 

Tears are rolling down Regina’s face now, she nods once.

“Can you give me them back?” She asks. 

Regina looks up, eyes wide in alarm, it never occurred to her that she would ask for that. 

“Regina please, I want to remember.” Mary Margaret pleads.

Regina shakes her head now.

“No. I can’t.” She says.

Mary Margaret knows that she doesn’t mean that it’s beyond her capability and yet another silence falls over the pair. 

“All right, I’m going to respect the fact that you’re not ready to talk about this just now, but I will be asking you again.” Mary Margaret says with more calmness than she feels. She pauses, trying to think how best to say what she needs to. “I need to tell you something.” 

Regina looks at her, taking in how she’s suddenly nervous.

“I understand a lot better now why you reacted the way you did to finding out you were pregnant.” She begins.

Regina looks at her strangely, not sure where this is going. 

“I think I know what reversed the effects of that potion you took.” Mary Margaret continues nervously. “When Emma and I got back from the enchanted forest, after we fell through the portal, I…I know I wasn’t exactly welcoming at the party.” She dancing around what she want to say and they both know it. “As you know, we can back through Lake Nostos but what I didn’t tell anyone is that I managed to get a little bit of the water before we came through. Not much, but enough and when I saw you sitting alone at that party. I wanted what I’d lost back, I wanted you back.” 

“The drink you gave me?” Regina thinks back, remembers Mary Margaret bringing her a drink over, she’d thought it was odd at the time but had appreciated that she was making an effort. 

“I put the water in it.” Mary Margaret admits. 

Regina sits silently, completely still for a moment as she absorbs this news.

“I didn’t know what it would do.” Mary Margaret says by way of an excuse.

“Exactly! You had no business giving me that without my knowledge!” Regina fumes.

“I know, I’m sorry.” Mary Margaret admits.

Regina is filled with anger, however much she might have regretted the decision she made that night it was her decision and now to find that it was taken away from her has her angry beyond reason. 

“You need to leave.” She says through gritted teeth.

“Regina please.” Mary Margaret tries to reason.

“Leave now before I do something we’ll both regret.” Regina warns. 

“Please know that I’m sorry.” Mary Margaret says, getting up and leaving the house.

Regina sits where she is, stewing, she can’t even rationalize why she’s so angry. 

After a while, Robin comes back downstairs. 

“Is everyone gone?” He asks.

“Yes.” She answers and instantly knows something has happened.

“Are you alright?” He asks, though he knows she’s not.

“Never better.” She replies with a forced, fake smile. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asks.

“No.” She replies curtly.

“There’s a surprise.” He mutters under his breath but she hears it.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” She flies off the handle at him.

“Whoa!” He holds his hands up in mock surrender. “Whoever you’re angry at, don’t take it out on me.” He says. “Unless it is me.” He adds as an afterthought.

Regina sighs again. 

“It’s not you.” She admits.

“Good, now let’s go to bed.” He says, taking her hand and gently pulling her to stand up. 

“I think I’ve slept enough.” She counters as he pulls her into his arms and kisses her. 

“Oh really? Well there’s plenty of other things I can of to keep us occupied in bed.” He says suggestively. He can feel her entire body stiffen, clearly that’s not on the cards tonight. “Or not.” 

“I’m sorry.” She says pulling away and turning her back to him.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for my love.” Robin says, pulling her back to face him. “Let’s go upstairs and get some sleep, proper sleep.” He says taking her hand.


	34. Chapter 34

Regina spends a long time in the bathroom after they go upstairs, first in a scalding hot shower hoping that somehow the water will wash away the memories that she’s just been forced to relive, and then busying herself tidying and cleaning. She’s not intentionally trying to wait in there until Robin’s asleep, but if he is, she can’t deny she’d be relieved. She checks on the boys before she finally heads to their room, she finds it in darkness and feels herself relax at the thought of him being asleep. She nearly jumps out of her skin when his voice cuts through the darkness as she approaches the bed. 

“Are you alright?” He asks.  
She climbs into the bed, able to see him slightly better now her eyes have adjusted to the dark. She’s sitting up, back against the headboard and he sits up too. 

“I’m fine.” She replies with a coldness to her voice that’s unintentional. 

He looks at her, studies her while she refuses to meet his eyes and his gaze is filled with sadness. 

“I know you’re not.” He tells her, reaching out to cup her cheek with the palm of his hand and gently pull her head upwards so she’s looking at him. “I’m here when you’re ready to talk.” 

She works her bottom lip between her teeth, trying desperately to keep tears at bay. She’s not ready, not tonight and truth be told she doesn’t know that she ever will be. He takes his hand away and her head drops back down, staring at her hands. Memories flash through her mind of the things she done with those hands, the terrible, unspeakable things. 

She throws back the covers fiercely as if they are the memories themselves and stands up, running her hands through her still damp hair. 

“Regina?” Robin’s understandably alarmed by her sudden move.

“I can’t sleep.” She says, beginning to pace the room like a caged animal. “I…I need some air.” She says grabbing a pair of jeans from her closet and hastily pulling them on.

“It’s one a.m.” Robin states, he’s still sitting on the bed watching her with concern, his voice is calm as he speaks.

“I need to get out of this house.” She’s flustered now. It suddenly feels as though the wall are closing in on her.

“Well wait until I can get someone over to watch the boys and I’ll come with you.” Robin says, getting up out of the bed and gathering clothes to get dressed.

“No!” She doesn’t intend for it to come out as forcefully as it does. “No.” She repeats, softer this time. “I just, I need some time alone.” 

She turns and is out the room before he can say anything else, he’s left standing staring at the empty doorway with one leg in his pants. 

Downstiars, Regina quickly pulls on a pair of sneakers and grabs the first jacket she finds, it’s Robin’s and it’s so big on her it looks utterly ridiculous but she’s halfway down the block before she even notices. It’s warm against the chill of the night air, and she pulls it tightly around herself inhaling the scent from it. His scent, she smiles as she thinks it smells like forest. It seems like a lifetime ago she said those words to Snow with such distaste.

She walks quickly and to anyone watching it would seem like with purpose but she has no idea where she’s going.

It’s a surprise to her when she ends up at the beach, she’s not been here in so long. When Storybrooke was new she’d spent a lot of time here, marvelled at the unending horizon. It wasn’t that she’d never seen the ocean, of course she had, but she’d lived inland most of her life, had never had it on her doorstep and had definitely never just sat and taken it all in before. Her mother would have had no time for such foolishness and by the time she was queen she was consumed with hatred and revenge that nothing else mattered. She’d brought Henry hear when he was younger, he used to love playing in the sand and she smiles at the memories.

She sits down in the sand, facing out towards the sea, it’s just blackness in the dark but she can see the waves on the shore and hear the sound of them, it’s soothing and rhythmic and she feels herself begin to calm and as she does, her mind starts to wander. She pulls her knees up to her chest, Robin’s jacket big enough that she can slip them underneath it too for warmth, and wraps her arms around her legs.

Thoughts about spending time here with Henry lead to thoughts of her other children. 

There’s no longer any question in her mind, Roland is her son but she feels overwhelmed with guilt when she thinks of the circumstances of how that came to be. She killed his mother, not with her own hands but the blame is hers all the same. It doesn’t matter that Zelena changed it, not in her mind. 

Lucas, her gorgeous little Lucas, not even 8 weeks old and already been through so much. Like Henry, he’s seen such awful things, lost too many people for one so young. She didn’t protect them.

What kind of a mother was she to let these things happen to her children? She didn’t deserve them. The universe must have known that, that’s why two of her children were taken away before she could cause them hurt. 

She doesn’t know how long she’s been there, and she doesn’t realize there are tears rolling down her face as she watches the sun come up. 

“Regina?” 

She jumps again, completely unaware that anyone has been approaching. It’s daylight now, she must have been here for hours. She stretches her legs out in front of her, they’re sore and stiff from being in the one position for so long. She doesn’t turn to look at the person speaking, nor does she look when she plonks herself down on the sand next to her. 

“Robin called, he was worried.” Mary Margaret explains. 

Regina stays silent. 

Mary Margaret looks out to the ocean with her then, staying quiet for a while. 

“I used to love watching the sunrise, it always made me think about how this was a whole new day with all sorts of possibilities.” Mary Margaret finally breaks the silence. 

“Please.” Regina says with a deep sigh. “Save the hope speech.” There’s no malice in her voice, she just sounds weary.

“I wasn’t…” She trails off, the denial sounds weak even to her own ears. Of course she was. 

“I don’t blame you if you're still angry with me.” Mary Margaret says, worried that Regina still hasn’t so much as glanced her way. “I understand.” 

Regina makes a noise that’s almost like a laugh with a shrug of her shoulders. 

“Maybe you could explain it to me then.” She says sadly. 

“You made a choice a long time ago and I changed that, whether I meant to or not.” Mary Margaret’s been thinking about this all night. “You spent your whole life with people making decisions for you first your mother and then…” She pauses, finding it hard to even think about what she saw. “My father.” She says it quietly. “And Rumplestiltskin.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Regina finally says quietly after a long pause and silence falls over them. 

“You must be freezing.” Mary Margaret finally says. “Have you been out here all night?” 

“I don’t know, I was walking…and then I was here.” Regina seems to be almost in a daze. 

“Regina, we need to get you inside and warmed up, come on.” Mary Margaret says, standing and encouraging Regina to do the same. 

“I’m fine.” Regina protests, not moving. 

“Yes, of course you are.” Mary Margaret doesn’t do sarcasm often, but it seems warranted here. She reaches down for Regina, taking her hand and gasping when she touches it. “You’re as cold as ice, come on, we’re going.” She says, pulling the other woman up. The most worrying thing is that Regina comes, she stands when Mary Margaret tugs on her arm and she walks when she puts her arm around her back and starts to guide her back towards town. 

Mary Margaret quickly sends a text to Robin as they’re walking to let him know he can call off the search and that Regina is safe. 

They’re almost back to town when Regina suddenly veers off in a different direction than Mary Margaret intended. 

“Where are you going?” Mary Margaret asks following after her. “Regina?”

“Just come with me.” Regina says without slowing.

“What are we doing here?” Mary Margaret asks as they get to the door of Regina’s vault.

Regina stops dead in her tracks and turns back to look at her. 

“You asked me for something last night.” Regina says. 

Mary Margaret thinks back. 

“My memories?” She clarifies. “You’re going to give them back?” 

Regina turns then and goes down into the vault, Mary Margaret following and watching as Regina kneels and digs around in a trunk for a few minutes before standing up holding a wooden box. 

“I need to know that you're sure about this.” Regina says, looking Mary Margaret straight in the eye for the first time that morning. 

“I am.” Mary Margaret says with a nod, she doesn’t sound all that confident however. 

“These aren’t good memories.” Regina says, eyes filled with a sorry that suggest she’s understating things. “I…You remember your father as a good and kind man, I don’t want to take that away from you.” She looks down as though she’s ashamed.

Mary Margaret reaches out to where one of Regina’s hands rest on the box she’s holding in front of her, she puts her hand over Regina’s and squeezes it reassuringly. 

“I would rather that I knew truth.” Mary Margaret says steadfastly. 

Regina hesitates again. 

“It’s too much.” Regina says shaking her head. “You were so young, too young.”

“I’m not too young anymore Regina.” Mary Margaret tells her. 

Taking a deep breath, Regina opens the box and reveals a dreamcatcher. Looking back, she can’t say why she took Snow’s memories this way, she certainly never intended to give them back, perhaps she just had to be sure she’d taken everything, sure in a way she couldn’t be with the potion she slipped to everyone else in the castle. 

Regina lifts the dreamcatcher up in front of Mary Margaret. She gives her one more questioning look, but Mary Margaret just nods, she’s ready. Regina activates the dreamcatcher and a beam of light goes out towards Mary Margaret’s forehead.


	35. Chapter 35

_Snow’s Memories_

Snow watched as her step-mother picked at her food, not really eating anything, with concern. It was nearly three weeks now and Regina still didn’t look any better. She’d told her it was nothing and not to worry but Snow was worried, she couldn’t lose her mother, not again. 

Once dinner was over, Regina excused herself to her chambers and Snow followed after her. 

“Regina, are you dying?” Snow asks bluntly as Regina sits at her dressing table to get ready for bed. 

Regina is startled for a second then laughs and turns around on the stool she’s sitting on. 

“Why on earth would you think that?” Regina asks with a smile. 

Snow approaches her step-mother cautiously, still not convinced despite her smile.

“You’ve hardly eaten all week and you’re pale and sick looking and I heard some of the servants talking about you throwing up. You said it was nothing but you’re not getting any better and my mother said it was nothing to worry about and she died!” Her words and rushed and she becomes near hysterical and crying by the end. 

Regina’s demeanour changes immediately.

“Come here.” She opens her arms to Snow and brings the girl to sit on her lap even though she’s really much too big for such things. Snow’s head comes to rest on Regina’s shoulder and she cradles it there, stroking her head comfortingly. “I am not dying, there really isn’t anything for you to worry about.” 

“But if you’re not dying why are you sick?” Snow asks through tears.

Regina sighs, and Snow can see she’s thinking about what to say.

“The truth is, I’ve been feeling unwell because I’m going to have a baby.” Regina says with a smile.

Snow jumps up on to her feet with her excitement.

“You are?” She asks, grinning.

“Yes.” Regina confirms. “But your father doesn’t want the kingdom to know until the baby’s born, so he’s not making an announcement.” 

“But why?” Snow asks.

“He wants to know if it’s a girl or a boy first.” Regina tells her and even Snow can see a hint of sadness in her when she says it despite how well she tries to cover it up.

“Why would that matter?” Snow asks, genuinely confused.

“Because if it’s a boy, he’ll be the next King.” Regina says with a sad smile.

“Oh.” Snow hadn’t thought of that, she’d always been told the kingdom would be hers one day. “That doesn’t matter.” She says, and she genuinely means it. “I think it’s going to be a boy!” She says, feeling excited again.

“You do?” Regina asks and Snow can’t understand why she seems so surprised by her excitement.

“I do.” Snow says with a self-assured nod. “And I’m going to be the best big sister ever. Thank you for telling me Regina!” She hugs her step-mother tightly. “I’ll leave you to rest.” Snow says, leaving the chambers with a wide grin on her face. 

 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Snow hurries through the palace excitedly, it’s been three long months since she’s seen her beloved step-mother. Her father had insisted she accompany him on his latest diplomatic visit to a far off kingdom. He had promised they’d only be gone a month, but one turned into two and eventually three before they’d set off home.

Snow was barely out of the carriage before she was asking where Regina was and bounding into the palace to find her. She finds her in the dining hall just as she’d been told, talking to the cook about what to prepare for tonight’s feast Snow imagines.

Regina looks up from the conversation she’s having just as Snow enters.

“Snow, I didn’t know you were back.” She says with a smile and with a nod of her head dismisses the cook. 

Snow moves towards her and hugs her. 

“Obviously or you would have been waiting to greet your King.” Her father enters behind Snow. 

“Of course your majesty, my apologies.” Regina replies.

“I trust all is well.” Her father asks.

“Everything is as it should be.” Regina says tensely. 

“You look well again, doesn’t she father? So very pretty.” Snow asks, oblivious to the tension. 

“Yes.” Her father replies. “Indeed she does.” He says as he walks back out of the room. 

“How much longer until the baby comes?” Snow asks excitedly. 

“Not until the summer.” Regina replies with a smile.

Snow tuts. 

“Patience.” Regina says with a laugh.

“I thought by now I’d at least be able to see it.” Snow says, referring to there not being any obvious sign of Regina being pregnant yet.

“Believe me, your brother or sister is making their presence known, I can’t even fasten my riding pants anymore.” Regina says with a laugh.

“Riding?” Snow says with alarm. “You haven’t been riding have you? That’s dangerous.”

“A gentle trot through the forest every now and then.” Regina says with another laugh. “I’m hardly out jumping fences.” 

“Still.” Snow says seriously, concerned for her step-mother and unborn sibling. 

Regina frowns at her.

“How was your trip?” She asks, clearly wanting to change the subject.

“It was mostly very tiresome, there was no one my age there and not very much to do.” Snow answers very seriously.

“I see.” Regina says. “Well, perhaps you should go and get cleaned up for dinner tonight, you probably want to rest a while beforehand after your long travels.”

“I’ll see you at dinner.” Snow smiles and heads towards her chambers.

She mentions to her father later that night about Regina’s riding while they’re waiting on her to come down for dinner and he seems just as upset at the idea as she was and Snow can’t help but feel that it validates her concern. She can’t understand why Regina seems so upset when her father her tells her over dinner that she’s not to ride anymore.

The very next day her father announced that word had come of some urgent business in the maritime kingdom and he told Snow, despite all her protestations to the contrary, that she would be accompanying him. 

 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------

 

They were gone two months this time and when they got back there was no longer any mistaking that Regina was pregnant. 

She was waiting for them as their carriage arrived. 

“My Queen.” Snow’s father greeted her. “How nice of you to greet us.” 

“Well, I couldn’t miss an opportunity to set foot outside the palace.” Regina says with a smile but she’s looking at her father oddly and Snow wonders exactly what she means. 

She doesn’t ponder on it too long however, too excited to see how her step-mother’s belly has grown to accommodate her brother or sister. 

“It can’t be long now!” Snow says excitedly.

“It will be a month or two yet.” Regina laughs at her enthusiasm.

 

Later that night, Snow once again goes to visit Regina in her bedchambers, it’s later than she normally would, but she has something she wants to give to Regina. 

She knocks at the door, gently in case Regina’s asleep. 

“Come in.” She hears Regina call.

She enters, carefully holding her present behind her back. 

“You weren’t sleeping we you?” Snow asks as she slowly approaches the bed where Regina is lying, propped up by a lot of pillows. 

“No.” Regina says with a quick laugh. “The baby’s doing somersaults I think.” She says rubbing her expanded stomach tenderly. 

“I wanted to give you something.” Snow says shyly. “Well, really it’s for the baby.” She explains.

“What is it dear?” Regina asks, noticing the awkward way she’s standing to hide what she’s holding.

Snow produces a stuffed animal from behind her back, a rabbit if Regina’s not mistaken, she’s seen it in Snow’s room. 

“It’s Mr. Bunny.” Snow says, thrusting it towards Regina. “I’ve had him since I was born and I thought it might be nice if my brother…or sister, had him too.” 

“Oh Snow.” Regina says, and Snow can see her eyes are filling with tears. “That’s so sweet, I’m sure the baby will love it just as much as you have.” Regina says, placing the bunny next to her on the bed. 

Snow stands there awkwardly for a moment. 

“Do you want to feel?” Regina asks, indicating her stomach. 

“Can I?” Snow asks, she’s beyond excited at the thought.

“Of course dear, come here.” Regina says, patting the bed beside her. 

Snow sits down next to Regina who then takes her hand and places it on her stomach. A moment or two passes before Snow feels the movement under hand.

“There, did you feel that?” Regina asks.

“That’s amazing.” Snow says, full of wonder.

“It’s amazing until you’re trying to sleep.” Regina says with a laugh.

“I can’t wait to meet him or her.” Snow says, still staring in wonder at where her sibling is moving beneath her hand. 

Regina looks at her with a thoughtful smile and Snow wonders what it is that she’s thinking, she notices that looks a little sad despite the smile. 

“I should go and let you rest.” Snow says, getting up of the bed. She hovers for a minute before she awkwardly kisses her stepmothers forehead. 

“Snow.” Regina calls out to her just as she gets to the door. “Why don’t you come back tomorrow morning and we’ll spend the day together, like we used to.”

“I’d love that.” Snow replies with a wide grin before she turns and leaves.

 

The next morning, Snow rushes to get ready, excited about spending the day with her stepmother. She tries to hide her disappointment when Regina doesn’t come down for breakfast and after an hour or two she decides to go looking for her.

She knocks on the door to Regina’s room, opening the door when there’s no answer after a few minutes. The room’s still dark, the curtains drawn and Regina’s still in bed, Snow turns to leave.

“Snow?” Regina’s voice is sleepy and full of confusion as to why her stepdaughter is in her chambers. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you, I was just worried when you didn’t answer.” Snow explains.

“What time is it?” Regina frowns, rubbing her forehead and pushing her hair back from her face.

“It’s nearly midday.” Snow replies. 

Regina still looks confused, as if she’s trying to remember where she left something. 

“Oh, we were supposed to spend the day together.” She says as it suddenly occurs to her why Snow is there. “Give me a moment and I’ll get ready.” She tries to feign a smile but it comes out as more of a grimace.

“Are you alright?” Snow asks, concerned.

“Yes of course.” Regina replies. “I’m just tired.” She admits with a more genuine smile.

“Why don’t you just rest then, we can spend time together another day.” Snow offers, trying to hide her disappointment. 

“No.” Regina says as she sits up on the side of her bed. “I promised you we’d spend the day together and we will, what’s left of it anyway.”

“If you’re sure.” Snow says, watching as Regina stands and pulls back the curtains in her nightgown. 

“Of course I’m sure.” Regina says as she moves to her wardrobe and begins to look for something to wear. “I would really like for us to be closer again.” She says it with her back to Snow, but her voice is full of emotion.

“I’d love that too!” Snow replies happily. Her smile fades though as she watches Regina, her back is still to Snow but her entire posture has changed, she’s leaned forward using one hand on the wardrobe to steady herself. “Regina?” Snow calls out to her, her worry growing. 

A cry of pain is the only response she gets. 

Snow rushes forward, standing beside Regina now she can see her stepmother is clearly in agony and holding onto her stomach as though it were the source. 

“Regina?” Snow says her name again, not sure what to do. 

“Something’s wrong.” Regina manages to turn and look at Snow, her eyes full of fear, before another wave of pain hits her and she’s nearly doubled over.

Snow moves so that she can put the arm Regina’s using to brace herself against the wardrobe around her shoulders. 

“We have to get you back to bed.” Snow says with more confidence than she feels. “Come on, lean on me.” 

It’s a struggle, but Snow manages to get her there. 

“I’ll get help.” Snow says, turning and running out of the room before Regina has a chance to say anything. 

She runs down the corridor, cursing the fact that she normally can’t get a moment to herself without a servant fussing around her but the minute she actually wants someone there’s no one to be found. 

“Sarah!” Snow shouts as she sees one of the servants at the end of the corridor. 

“Your majesty, what’s wrong?” Sarah asks, rushing towards the princess who’s clearly alarmed.

“It’s Regina, something wrong with her, with the baby, send for the court physician right away!” Snow orders before spinning on her heal and heading straight back to Regina’s room. 

Regina’s in the bed where she left her, but the pain she’s experience is clearly getting worse. She’s crying out with the pain every few minutes, it’s leaving her breathless, she’s pale and sweaty.

“Regina.” Snow says, standing awkwardly at the side of the bed, unsure what to do. “I’ve sent for the doctor, he should be here soon. He’ll know what to do, you’ll be ok, both of you.” She tries to sound confident but fails.

Regina suddenly whips back the bed covers in a panic, eyes wide with fear and full of dread when she sees exactly what she’s obviously feared. There’s a pool of blood on the sheets and it’s spreading before their eyes. 

A group of the servants come rushing in, including Johanna, and Snow breathes a sigh of relief at the sight of them, Snow has no idea what she’s supposed to do. 

The women bustle around Regina, water and towels appear all over the room, the fire is stoked and more water is set above it to boil. All the while Regina is crying out and whimpering with the pain and none of them go near her. Snow feels anger boiling up inside her, why is no one actually helping Regina? 

Snow goes to her stepmother then, she takes her hand in her own and starts to tell her everything will be ok. She uses her free hand to dip one of the cloths that has appeared at the bedside in the bowl of water that appeared along with it and mops Regina’s brow. 

The court physician bursts into the room next, a pompous man that Snow’s never been particularly fond of, but she’s never been so glad to see him. 

“Let’s see what we’re dealing with here then.” He says, unceremoniously lifting Regina’s bloodstained nightgown and opening a bag of what looks like torture devices. 

Johanna approaches Snow at this point. 

“We should go now your majesty.” She says, putting her hands on Snow’s shoulders and trying to guide her away. 

“No, I’m not leaving her!” Snow replies resolutely. 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Johanna says.

“Lucky then that’s it not up to you.” Snow says with as much authority as she can muster with the current level of terror she feels. “I’m staying.” 

“As you wish.” Johanna says, backing away. 

“Your majesty.” The court physician is speaking now, trying to get Regina’s attention. 

“What’s happening?” Regina manages to ask through gritted teeth and panted breaths as the stabbing pain continues to hit her in frequent waves. 

“You’re losing a lot of blood your majesty, the child needs to be delivered quickly.” The doctor tells her with none of his usual smugness or pomp, which worries Snow even more, this must be serious. 

“It’s too soon!” Regina protests, still through gritted teeth, she’s clearly terrified for her child. 

“There’s no choice your majesty, we may lose you both otherwise.” The doctor tells her, trying his best to be kindly. 

A look passes between the physician and Johanna and even at her young age, Snow realizes that her sibling is in all likelihood already gone. A wave of sadness washes over her, but she fights back the tears she feels threatening to fall. She has to be strong for Regina, she can’t lose another mother, she won’t.

The doctor reaches into his bag with his now blood soaked hands and retrieves another device, Regina cries out once again when the physician uses it and Snow’s no longer sure she even wants to understand what’s happening, she continues mopping Regina’s forehead and face with the wet cloth and she’s never let go of her hand. 

“Your majesty, you have to push when the next pain comes.” The doctor instructs Regina. 

“It’s too soon.” Regina cries. 

“Your majesty you must.” The doctor urges. 

“No.” Regina says and then repeats the word over and over through her tears.

“Regina please!” Snow begs, squeezing her hand. “You have to do what he says, I can’t lose you too!” 

Regina looks at Snow and makes unwavering eye contact for a moment, it’s a strange look and Snow can’t quite discern the emotions she sees flickering across her stepmother’s face. It’s over before Snow has more time to think about it though as more pain hits Regina and she complies with the doctor’s instructions, bearing down. 

Words of encouragement from the doctor and Snow are the only things said in the room between Regina’s cries of pain. Only Johanna remains in the room, having sent the other servants away, she busies herself with boiling the water to clean to the doctor’s instruments. 

“Good your majesty, well done.” The doctor says again. “Almost done.”

Snow risks a glance down to where he’s working and is alarmed at the amount of blood she sees. She watches as Johnna picks up a bundle of blood stained cloths up off the bed and moves over to another large bowl of water, as she watches though, she notices there’s something odd in the way she’s carrying them and she realizes with horror that it’s not a bundle of cloths at all, it’s the baby. 

Regina bears down a few more times and then the physician declares that it’s over. Snow watches in horror as Regina fights to sit up, she’s clearly exhausted but she fights anyway, desperately trying to catch a glimpse of her child. 

“Your majesty, I’m so very sorry but the child was born still.” The doctor informs her. 

She becomes very still then, alarming so, frozen in position sitting up on the bed. 

“Boy or girl?” She asks, her voice perfectly calm.

“A boy, your majesty.” The doctor reports solemnly. 

“I want to see him.” Regina says, and despite the calmness that’s suddenly come over her, she’s clearly still in physical pain. 

“I’ll get him.” Snow says, getting up. She’s fearful, not sure what to expect as she approaches Johanna, she gasps when she sees him, Johanna’s washed the blood from him and he looks like any other baby Snow’s seen, just very small. He’s tiny in fact, but perfect, as though he were sleeping. 

“Are you sure?” Johanna asks in a whisper.

“Yes, it should be family.” Snow replies quietly, sounding far more mature than her thirteen years. 

Johanna nods then and gently passes the baby to Snow who gazes at her brother lovingly for a moment before she moves and passes him carefully to Regina with tears streaming down her face. Regina is slumped back against the pillows now, looking deathly pale and drawn and covered in a sheen of sweat. 

“He’s beautiful.” Regina says as gazes as her son and tears start to fall from her eyes too, she strokes his cheek lovingly. “Noah.”

“That’s a beautiful name.” Snow says, wiping her tears away. “For a beautiful boy.” 

“I love you so much.” Regina tells her son. “I’m so sorry.” 

Snow watches as Regina grows weaker by the minute, desperately worried. 

Suddenly the door to the room is thrown open by two of the king’s guard and Snow’s father walks in followed by two of his personal servants. 

Johanna and the physician bow immediately. 

“Well?” Her father demands.

“I’m afraid the child was born still your majesty.” The doctor reports. “A boy.” 

“I see.” He says with a look of disdain towards Regina. “And my wife?” 

“The bleeding has slowed some now and I’m hopeful it will soon stop but she’s lost a great deal of blood, only time will tell.” The doctor nervously reports. 

“I see.” He father says with a disinterested sigh. “Dispose of that.” He instructs the servant girl behind him, pointing to Regina, no, to the baby, Snow realizes in horror. 

The girl hesitates for a moment. 

“Now.” The king instructs and the servant girl moves towards Regina nervously. 

The girl reaches out towards the baby but Regina pulls him closer. 

“No, you’re not taking him.” Regina says, though it’s clear she’s too weak to put up much of a fight. 

The girl looks to Leopold, clearly unsure what to do, he merely huffs in response and turns to the male servant who accompanied him, instructing him with a look to do what the girl has not. 

The man approaches Regina then and it is clear he is also somewhat reluctant. 

“I’m sorry your majesty.” He says in a whisper that the King can’t hear as he reaches down and takes the tiny bundle from Regina’s arms. He turns then and leaves the room as he has been instructed to do by his King, trying his best to ignore the sobs coming from Regina. 

Regina tries to follow him, despite Snow, the doctor and Johanna’s protests, she’s too weak to stand however and collapses the moment she tries, the doctor thankfully able to catch her and lift her back into bed before she hit the ground. 

The king watches this scene unfold and then with a shake of head leaves. Regina’s unconscious now, but Snow’s resolute that she’s not leaving her stepmother’s side despite Johanna trying to convince her otherwise. 

 

Snow is beside herself with worry as an entire day passes and Regina doesn’t so much as stir. She’s deathly pale with dark shadows around her eyes. The doctor declared a few hours after she passed out that the bleeding had stopped and Snow had been forced to leave the room by Johanna while several of Regina’s servants had tended to her. 

“Are you alright Snow?” Johanna asks as she places a bowl of oatmeal in front of her. 

“I’m not sure.” Snow admits. 

“You should have left when I asked you, you’re much too young to see such things.” Johanna says sadly. 

“No, it’s not that, I mean, it was horrible…” Snow admits. “I’m worried about Regina.” She explains. “And I don’t understand how my father could act like that.” 

“Men sometimes deal with things differently.” Johanna suggests.

“It was wrong.” Snow’s adamant. 

“Perhaps, but he’s the king and it’s not our place to question his wishes.” Johanna says, a note of caution in her voice and Snow feels like she’s being warned. 

“I understand.” She says. 

“Good. Now eat your oatmeal.” Johanna says with a kind smile.

“I’m not really very hungry.” Snow says, taking a spoonful. 

“You’ve been in that room since yesterday and it’s very nearly dawn, you need to keep your strength up or you’ll be no use to the queen.” Johanna chides. 

Snow reluctantly eats the oatmeal and then insists that she return to Regina immediately. She’s surprised when she’s lead to different chambers by Johanna and looks at her questioningly. 

“We had to move her, there’ll be no saving that mattress.” Johanna explains. 

“Oh.” Snow hadn’t thought about that.

She enters the room, one that has a large balcony overlooking the courtyard and the sun is coming up now, spilling light into the room. Against the new sheets Regina looks even worse and Snow’s heart grows heavy as she tries to prepare herself for the worst whilst continuing to hope for the best. 

 

Another day passes and Regina still doesn’t waken, the doctor has instructed the servants in how to give Regina drops of water while she’s asleep and Snow has insisted upon being the one to do it. She’s barely left the room except when Johanna has insisted she eat and she’s even slept in the chair next to the bed. 

Snow’s just waking up when she sees the first sign of movement from Regina, she rushes to the door and shouts for the first servant she sees to fetch the doctor. 

“Regina?” Snow says as she rushes over to her bed, taking her stepmother’s hand. 

Regina squeezes her eyes and swallows dryly before she opens her eyes, squinting at the unfamiliar room. Her free hand then moves to her stomach. 

“I was hoping it was a dream.” Regina says, voice rough and scratchy. 

“I’m so sorry Regina.” Snow says, unsure what else to say. “Here, have a drink of water.” 

Regina looks at her, stares at her intently for a moment and Snow feels a malevolence from her that she’s never before but before she can say anything else the doctor enters the room. 

“Your majesty!” He says, some of his smugness returned. “I’m so pleased to see you awake.” 

He sends Snow out of the room to examine Regina and when she returns, her stepmother has turned onto her side, facing away from the door. 

“Regina?” Snow calls out, she says it again when she doesn’t get a response after a few minutes. 

“Go away.” Comes the quiet reply and Snow can’t deny that it cuts her to the core. 

“Can I get you anything?” Snow asks. 

There’s a pause before she replies. 

“My father.” Regina finally says. 

Snow frowns, the old man had returned to his home after the wedding and the disappearance of Regina’s mother, it would take days for him to get here. 

“I’ll send word right away.” Snow says, turning to leave and do just that. 

Snow spent the rest of the day in the garden, gazing up occasionally at the window to what was now Regina’s room. She could understand her wanting to be alone, but she couldn’t deny the rejection hurt. When she went to her own chambers that night, she felt sure she had found a good reason to return to Regina’s room tomorrow lying on her bed waiting for her. 

 

The next day, Snow cautiously entered Regina’s darkened room. The curtains were drawn and the darkness in the room seemed to match the mood of its occupant. She had heard the servants talking about how sharp her tongue was and how she had thrown the food they had taken her after they’d tried to coax her into eating. 

“Regina?” Snow says, approaching the woman who is curled up on her side in the bed staring blankly at the wall. 

“Leave me alone.” Regina says, but there’s no ferocity to it, it’s a plea more than anything. 

“I will, I just…I wanted to give you something. Give it back to you actually.” Snow says nervously, she’s suddenly not very sure this is a good idea but she’s started now. “I found this on my bed last night.” She says producing the stuffed toy she’d given Regina. “It didn’t seem right, I gave to this to you.” She explains. “To Noah.” She continues. “I thought you might want it, so you would have something that was his.” Snow feels foolish now, like her idea is a very childish one but she passes the toy to Regina anyway. 

Regina looks at the toy for a moment, then at Snow and another strange mix of emotions seems to flicker over her face. 

“Thank you.” She says, and pulls the toy close to her chest, holding it tightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For clarification - Snow's memories from this chapter are set not long after the flashbacks in 205 - The Doctor. So, after Jefferson, Whale and Rumple have tricked Regina into giving them the heart and convinced her there's no bringing Daniel back, but before the very last flashback where she goes to Rumple and crushes the girls heart. 
> 
> In my head canon there was always a bit of gap before that happened and apparently I've decided to fill it in.


	36. Chapter 36

Mary Margaret gasps in shock as the dreamcatcher finishes its job. She looks to Regina, eyes wide in surprise as the enormity of what she’s just remembered hits her. 

“Regina, I don’t even know what to say.” Mary Margaret says.

“There’s nothing to say.” Regina says, moving to leave the vault. 

“Regina don’t.” Mary Margaret says, putting a hand on her arm to stop her. “I’m sorry, I know that this is painful for you but there’s still so much I don’t understand.”

Regina stands still for a moment, deciding whether to leave or to finally confront what she’d hidden for so long. 

“Fine.” She finally says, turning to look at Mary Margaret and then sitting on the trunk beneath the mirror. “Ask your questions.” 

“Why didn’t my father want the kingdom to know you were pregnant?” Mary Margaret asks, she’s still standing.

It’s not the first question Regina was expecting, not by a long shot and the answer is one she isn’t sure she wants to give in its entirety.

“I told you at the time.” Regina replies.

“Regina.” Snow says, tilting her head. “You’ve come this far, you might as well tell me the truth.”

Regina considers this for a long moment before deciding that Mary Margaret has a point.

“You really never did pay any attention to the politics did you?” Regina says with a sad laugh. “Your father was a paranoid man, though in this case with good reason.” She says, pausing again before continuing. “He had promised your hand in marriage to several neighbouring kingdoms once you’d come of age. It was enough to stop them attacking, they thought the kingdom would be theirs soon enough through marriage.” She says with a shrug. “News of a potential male heir could have led to outright war or assassination attempts.”

“What was he going to do when I came of age?” Mary Margaret asks, feeling confused and angry at the same time. 

“Honestly? I have no idea.” Regina admits.

“I had no idea the kingdom was so vulnerable that he needed to plot and scheme like that.” Mary Margaret says, she’s feeling more and more like she didn’t know her father at all. 

“I didn’t focus on building an army so quickly just because I was ‘evil’ you know.” Regina says. 

“Did my father confine you to the palace because of me?” Mary Margaret asks, ignoring her comment about being evil. 

“He left instructions for me to not be allowed to leave.” Regina confirms what Mary Margaret suspects. 

“Because I told him you were still riding?” Mary Margaret pushes for an answer.

“He never bothered to explain his reasons to me.” Regina says with another shrug.

“I’m sorry.” Mary Margaret says. 

“You couldn’t have known.” Regina replies.

“Not just for that.” Mary Margaret explains. “That stupid bunny, I should never have taken it back. I made a big deal about it being something of Noah’s and then…”

“That’s hardly your fault, you didn’t even know and like you said, it was just a silly toy.” Regina tries to cover up how much it hurt her, she knows it’s not rational to blame Mary Margaret.

“How did you take everyone’s memories?” Mary Margaret asks.

“My father helped. I was still too weak to get out of bed for a few days after he arrived.” Regina replies, disgust in her voice when she describes her own weakness. “So he gathered what I needed for the forgetting potion and then put it in the well. I took your memories with dreamcatcher as well as his to make sure neither of you would remember anything.” 

“Why did you do it?” Mary Margaret asks.

“I had my reasons.” Regina replies enigmatically. 

Mary Margaret looks at her, prompting her to answer properly. 

“I couldn’t bear the looks.” Regina admits. “Everyone looking at me like I was this thing to be pitied and telling me how sorry they were.” 

It makes sense to Mary Margaret, she knows better than most how much Regina hates to look weak, something her mother no doubt caused. 

“Why didn’t you forget?” Mary Margaret wonders aloud. 

“I couldn’t do that.” Regina says, shaking her head. “That would have been like erasing his existence.” 

“I reminded you of him, didn’t I? Because I was there with you.” Mary Margaret says as it occurs to her. “It was another reason to hate me." There's another pause. "Did you blame me?” Mary Margaret asks quietly, she remembers the look Regina had given her, the malevolence.

“No.” She replies quickly, too quickly. “Not exactly.” She says off Mary Margaret’s questioning look. 

“Then what?” Mary Margaret pushes. “Regina, please just tell me the truth.” 

“I did blame you.” Regina finally admits. “But not for what you think.” 

“Then what?” Mary Margaret implores.

“It was so long ago…” Regina tries to deflect again, Mary Margaret gives her a look that says she’s not going to let it go and Regina lets out a weary sigh before she speaks. “I didn’t want to fight.” 

“I don’t-” Mary Margaret begins to say that she doesn’t understand, but it dawns on her half way through the sentence what Regina meant. “You did it for me?” She asks, astounded at the revelation. 

Regina works her jaw, looking up to the ceiling trying desperately to stop tears from falling. “I wasn’t an idiot, I knew what was happening.” Regina begins. “I just wanted to let go…” 

“Regina.” Mary Margaret isn’t sure what else to say. 

“And then you were there, with your big sad eyes, crying and telling me you couldn’t lose me.” The tears are falling again as Regina speaks. “So yes, I blamed you. I blamed you that I had to go on, for every day I had to live while my son didn’t.” There’s still anger in her words. 

“I had no idea.” Mary Margaret is stunned.

“How could you?” Regina says with an angry laugh. “It doesn’t matter, it’s all ancient history.” 

A silence falls over them as they’re both lost in thought. Something occurs to Mary Margaret as she recalls nights spent pouring over baby name books before Neal’s arrival. 

“Noah? That means peace doesn’t it?” She asks. 

She can see Regina trying to fight back tears again. 

“Yes.” She finally answers. “That’s what he would have been for me.” Regina says quietly. “I could have lived with everything else if I’d gotten to have him.” 

“I had a brother.” Mary Margaret says, feeling tears starting to form in her own eyes. “We could have been a real family.”

“I tried so hard to let it all go when I found out I was pregnant, to stop blaming you for Daniel. I had finally accepted that there was no way I could bring him back.” Regina says. “I wanted so badly to move on for the baby’s sake.” 

“That’s why Rumplestiltskin did it, if he hadn’t, you’d never have cast the curse.” Mary Margaret reasons. 

“Yes.” Regina agrees, she’d come to the same conclusion already. “And I once again went right along with what he wanted.” She adds, angry at herself. 

“Even if he hadn’t Regina, the way my father treated you…” She trails off as the image of Regina’s child being ripped from her arms plays out in her mind again, she sits down on another trunk, facing Regina. “I can’t blame you for wanting him dead.” 

“Nothing excuses what I did.” Regina replies tersely. 

“Perhaps.” Mary Margaret agrees. “I understand where she came from now though, the Evil Queen.” 

“Don’t.” Regina says. “Please, don’t.” 

“What?” Mary Margaret doesn’t understand what she means.

“Don’t try to make excuses for the things I did, you of all people.” Regina tells her, fighting back tears once again. “I made my choices and I can’t bear the thought of anyone thinking that only thing to have come of Noah’s existing was the creation of the ‘Evil Queen’.” 

“That’s not what I think.” Mary Margaret says softly. “So many things made her, all I’m saying is that I have a better understanding of how she came to be and why she did the things she did.” 

“You always talk about ‘The Evil Queen’ like she’s some different person.” Regina says with a hint of anger.

“I guess to me she is.” Mary Margaret only recognizes the fact as she’s saying it. 

“But she’s not!” Regina’s more frustrated than angry now. “I’m her, she’s me! I made the choice to give in to the darkness and the rage and I let myself be so consumed by it that revenge was all I could think about.” 

“And I’m saying that I understand why you made those choices.” Mary Margaret says. 

“How can you just stand there calmly and tell me you understand and everything I’ve done to you?” Regina asks, astounded by how calm Mary Margaret is just now. “You were ten years old when you told my mother about Daniel and you had no idea of the consequences.” Tears are streaming down Regina’s face now. “I blamed you for it all! If I hadn’t been forced to marry your father I’d never have had Noah to lose him. I would have been married to Daniel and having his children, I’d have been happy and I’d never have heard the name Rumplestiltskin.” She can barely get the last few words out before she’s sobbing, decades of pent up feelings being released. 

Mary Margaret’s crying now too and she goes to Regina, sitting on the trunk next to her and pulling her into her arms. 

Neither of them are sure how long they sit there, holding each other as they both cry. 

“I don’t understand you, how you can sit there and comfort me after everything I’ve done to you.” Regina finally says with a sniff.

“Because I know who you really are Regina, the true you, and despite all the terrible choices, you’re still that girl I met who saved me from a runaway horse and taught me the meaning of true love.” Mary Margaret says with a smile. 

“The things I did to you…” Regina says, still at a loss. 

“We forgive you, you know.” Mary Margaret says solemnly. 

Regina looks away, unable to keep eye contact with her. 

“What if I can’t forgive myself?” She whispers. 

“You’re going to have to find a way.” Mary Margaret answers.

“The things I did. Awful, unspeakable things I can never make up for.” Regina says, standing and walking forwards so her back is to Mary Margaret. 

“I don’t believe that’s true, you’ve saved countless lives in this town.” Mary Margaret says. “Maybe it’s not about making up for anything though, maybe the only way to forgive yourself is to learn from what’s happened before and make better choices, the way you have been.” 

“You don’t understand.” Regina says. “Every single day it’s a fight to make the right choice. My first instinct with almost everything is to lash out.” 

“Because part of you wants to hurt people before they get a chance hurt you.” Mary Margaret says, she wasn’t lying when she said she understood her better now. 

“I thought you were a teacher not a therapist?” Regina turns to face her and snaps, proving the very point Mary Margaret was making. 

“Regina, you’ve got a chance to be happy now, truly happy with Robin, don’t let it slip away because you’re scared.” Mary Margaret implores her.

“I think my mother was right about me, I don’t know how to be happy.” Regina admits her deep fear.

“Regina?” Robin says softly from behind her.


	37. Chapter 37

“Regina?” Robin says softly from behind her.

“How long have you been there?” Regina asks but she doesn’t turn to face him.

“Long enough.” He answers. “I was worried, Mary Margaret said she’d found you but it’s been hours since.” 

“I’m going to leave you two alone.” Mary Margaret says, she gives Regina’s arm a gentle reassuring squeeze as she walks passed her and then leaves the vault.

A silence falls over them, Regina still facing away from Robin, it seems to go on forever until finally Robin breaks it.

“Look at me.” He says. 

She doesn’t move so he reaches out gently pulls her to turn towards him.

“You don’t really believe that do you?” He asks, cupping her face with his hand and lifting her head so her eyes locked with his.

“I don’t know what I believe anymore.” She answers truthfully.

“What were you and Mary Margaret doing down here?” He asks.

She shakes her head, she can’t face this just now, not again. 

“Please talk to me.” Robin pleads.

“I can’t.” She says quietly, refusing to meet his eyes, too ashamed at her own weakness.

“And I can’t go on like this.” He snaps. He’s not shouting but his tone conveys that his frustration is bubbling towards anger. “I have literally lost count of the traumatic events you have been through in the last few months and you have barely said two words to me about any of them!” He’s getting louder now. “You spent a year in hell for pity’s sake!” 

She doesn’t move and inch, frozen to the spot as her eyes fill with tears.

“I’m sorry.” She says, her eyes still glued the floor. “I’ve been so selfish.” The tears she’s barely been holding back start to fall and she lets out a strangled sob.

He gathers her into his arms, holding her tightly against him. His sudden burst of anger quickly dissipating. 

“It’s me who should be apologising my love.” He tells her. “I’m sorry I got angry, I just…” He trails off, struggling to find the right words. “It frightens me when you push me away, I wish you would let me in but I need for you to know I’m not going anywhere, no matter what.” 

He’s still holding her tightly against him and he can feel her start to sag against him, exhaustion taking over. 

“Let’s get you home.” He says, starting to move towards the stairs.

Regina doesn’t move with him.

“Can we just stay here?” She asks meekly.

He smiles and takes her hand.

“Whatever milady wishes.” He says.

They make their way through the vault until they reach the bedroom, a room he was the only other one to know about, tucked away behind two-way mirrors and hidden doors. 

They’re still holding hands as they both sit on the edge of the bed. 

Regina hesitates over what she wants to say. 

“Would you…hold me?” She asks him.

He can tell that even now, as far as they have come, it’s costing her something to ask it of him.

“You don’t have to ask.” He says with a smile and he can’t help but gaze at her lovingly. 

He helps her slip his jacket off her and then lays down with her on the bed, she lays on her side and he follows suit, spooning again her back, his arm over her stomach, pulling her as close as possible to him. 

They lay in silence for a while, Regina drawing lazy patterns on the back of his hand with her finger where it rests over her stomach. 

“She asked for her memories back.” She tells him, abruptly breaking the silence, answering the question he had asked earlier but she’d refused to answer. 

He’s confused for a moment, not sure who asked for what memories until it suddenly occurs to him. 

“Of the baby?” He asks both for clarity’s sake and to keep her talking. 

Regina nods once as tears start to form in her eyes. 

“His name was Noah.” She says quietly, barely more than a whisper. 

He pulls her even closer to him. 

“That’s a beautiful name.” He tells her. 

There’s another long silence between them. Robin can sense that Regina wants to say something so he holds her and he waits patiently. 

“I want her to have a name.” She finally says, still in his embrace. 

He doesn’t say anything. 

“I want our daughter to have a name Robin.” She says, stronger this time, more determined. 

He’s surprised, Regina’s barely mentioned her since it happened. 

“I’d like that.” He tells her. Truth be told, he’d thought about it, but it was never the right time to bring it up. It feels like the right thing to do though.

“I’m sorry that I keep pushing you away.” She says. 

“Shhh.” He soothes. “You were protecting yourself because that’s all you’ve ever known how to do, I understand that.” He reassures her. “But you’re right, we need to grieve for her properly. Together. That’s the only way we can really move forward.” He pushes himself up from the bed and places a gentle kiss on her cheek before he lies back down and tries to pull her even closer to him. “And I think you and Mary Margaret need to grieve for your son too.” 

She doesn’t say anything, but pulls his hand into her own and moves it higher so it’s resting on her chest. He can feel her heart beating quickly as she struggles to contain her emotions.

“I don’t deserve you.” She says quietly.

He’s not even sure she meant to say it aloud.

“I wish you would stop saying that.” He says softly. “I’m going to spend the rest of my life proving to you that that’s not true.”

There’s a sudden flash of blue smoke and Lucas appears in front of Regina on the bed. 

Regina gasps in surprise and Robin sits up, looking around the room as if for some sort of explanation for his son’s sudden appearance. 

Regina smiles as she moves to pick him up. 

“Hello my special boy.” Her speech is exaggerated in that way that is somehow unavoidable when speaking to a baby. “You knew mommy needed a cuddle didn’t you?” 

Robin has stood up and rounded the bed now, standing in front of Regina and looking at her questioningly.

“I was just thinking about him.” She says with a shrug before returning her attention to the baby with a smile as he gurgled happily in her arms.

“He’s going to be a handful.” Robin smiles, enjoying the way she lights up with her son.

Robin’s cell phone rings, distracting his attention from watching Regina and their son.

“Hello.” He answers.

Regina watches him, trying to guess who he’s talking to.

“Henry, calm down. I’m with your mother and Lucas is here too.” He says.

That answers that then. 

“Yes well, he just popped in seemingly of his own accord.” Robin says with a slightly amused tone.

Suddenly Robin’s expression changes to one of concern. 

“What was that?” He asks in an alarmed tone. “Henry? Henry what’s going on?” 

Regina’s on her feet, looking at him with concern.

“It’s gone quiet. He was at Granny’s.” Robin says.

Regina stares at him for a moment before she gasps, her eyes widening.

“What is it?” Robin asks, even more alarmed now.

“Powerful magic, something’s very wrong.” She tells him, before transporting them all to the diner.

They appear in Granny’s to find it deserted. 

“Henry? Roland?” Regina shouts frantically, moving through the diner, checking behind the counter and in the kitchen.

“Hello?” Robin shouts as he runs past the jukebox and down the corridor connecting Granny’s businesses.

“There’s no one.” He tells her as he comes back into the diner.

They both head for the door, running out into the street. It’s just as deserted as Granny’s. 

“Oh my god.” Regina directs Robin’s attention to the ground where Henry’s cell phone is lying in the street. She pulls Lucas even closer to her. 

Robin runs up and down the street, checking in the buildings as her goes before he comes back to Regina. 

“They’re gone, they’re all gone.”


	38. Chapter 38

“Here.” Robin hands Regina Henry’s cell phone that he’s picked up from the middle of the street. 

Regina cradles Lucas with one arm as she looks at the cell phone for any clue as to where her son, and the rest of the town’s inhabitants, have seemingly vanished to. She unlocks the phone to find it in video mode. 

“He was filming something.” She says, hitting play as Robin stands beside her where he can see too. 

The video is hard to make out, the phone seemingly waving about at times and there’s a loud roaring noise along with a lot of wind making it difficult to hear what anyone is saying, there are a lot of muffled shouts. The camera suddenly whips round and a large looming circular black cloud can be seen, there’s electricity moving through it and whatever is in the middle of it seems to be moving in a circular motion. Regina pauses the video. 

“That’s a portal.” She says, voice full of worry and surprise. 

“To where?” Robin asks. 

“I have no idea.” She admits, using her free hand to rub her forehead, trying to fend off a headache. 

“Let’s head back inside.” Robin says, putting his arm around her shoulders and walking back into Granny’s with her. “I presume there was some sort of magical shield on your vault.” Robin guesses are they’re opening the door and walking back inside. “And that’s why we’re still here?”

“Yes, there’s a protection spell.” Regina confirms. 

She starts to pace the length of the diner, bouncing Lucas gently in her arms as she does so, her mind racing trying to figure what’s happened. 

“Regina, calm down.” Robin says, stepping in front of her putting both hands on her upper arms.

“How can I be calm? My sons and this entire town have just been sucked through a vortex to god knows where?” Her anger is misdirected at him and they both know it. 

“I know.” He says, his voice is calm and he’s trying to be soothing. “We are going to find them but you making yourself ill with worry won’t help that.” 

She sighs and her body visibly relaxes as she realizes he’s right. 

“You’ve been up all night, you need to rest.” Robin says.

“I’ll rest when Henry and Roland and everyone else is back.” Regina answers, unable to stop it sounding like an angry retort.

Lucas starts to fuss and they realize it’s time for a feed, Robin quickly prepares a bottle for him, takes him from Regina’s arms and sits on one of the stools at the counter as Regina starts to pace again.

“That portal has taken them to a different realm so a locator spell is useless.” She says, thinking out loud as she continues to walk up and down the diner. “We need to figure out a way to open another portal, but how?” 

“How has it been done in the past?” Robin asks. He knows most of the answers, but he also knows he needs to help her think this through. 

“There was Jefferson’s hat, but that’s been destroyed.” She’s talking to herself even as she answers his question, listing off in her mind all the ways that travel between realms has been achieved. “Magic beans, they’re all gone now of course. The apprentices’ wand wherever Gold took it.” She pauses, thinking. “Emma and Mary Margaret used the ashes of an enchanted tree and came through at the well, maybe there’s something there.” Her pacing picks up speed as her mind starts to go into overdrive. “Even if I could reopen it somehow, that would only go to the enchanted forest and we have no idea if that’s even where they are.” 

Lucas is finished feeding now and sleeping in his father’s arms. Robin gently places him in his car seat, presumably where he was before he felt the need to transport himself to his mother, and rounds the counter, making two cups of hot tea.

He places them on one of the tables, and then moves Lucas’ seat so it’s on top of the same table.

“Sit down.” He says to Regina. “Have some tea.”

“I know, I know.” She says with a smile. “Calm nerves lead to clear thoughts.” She mimics him with the phrase he so often uses to try and calm her down. 

He smiles at her as she sips the tea. 

“It’s hard to be calm when it seems like the universe is conspiring to keep me apart from my family.” She admits. 

“It won’t always be like this.” Robin says, taking her hand in his. 

“Won’t it?” She asks, incredulous. “It’s not even been a full day since I woke up from a sleeping curse and my-” She catches herself. “Our sons have been taken off to who knows where?” She’s exasperated with it all. “Lucas wasn’t even born before someone stole him from me.” 

“We got him back though, just like we’ll get Henry and Roland and all the others back.” Robin reassures her, though he’s overjoyed to hear her finally acknowledge that Lucas is hers, now is not the time. 

Regina sighs wearily. 

“Perhaps you should get some rest? You’ve been up all night and with rest might come clearer thoughts.” Robin suggests, placing his hand over hers and gently rubbing the back of her hand with his thumb.

“I can’t sleep while the boys are facing who knows what.” She says, pulling her hands free and dropping her head into them. “There has to be a way to get to them.”

“There will be and you will find it but we may have to face the possibility that it might not be today.” He tells her. “They’re with David, Mary Margaret, Emma and Hook, they’ll keep them safe. Granny will probably kill anyone who so much as looks at them the wrong way.” He tries to reassure her.

“How can you be so calm?” She asks in an accusatory tone, dropping her hands and looking up at him. “We don’t even know they’re all together!”

“I am every bit as worried as you.” He replies, biting back his own anger. “I know that you know that, don’t turn your frustration on me.”

“I’m sorry.” She says. “I just…”

“I know.” He says, taking one of her hands in his own again. “We will find them.”

Regina suddenly stands as a thought occurs to her.

“What?” Robin asks, standing along with her.

“I have an idea but we’ll need to go to the library.” She tells him, turning to head there immediately.

Robin picks up the car seat and follows after her.

“What is it?” He asks as they walk towards the library.

“The well.” She says, quickly striding on.

“What about it?” Robin asks, she’s not giving him much to go on.

She opens the door to the library and starts tearing through books without answering.

“Regina!” Robin shouts her name, trying to break her out of her concentration. “Tell me what you’re thinking so I can help you look.” He says once he has her attention.

He places Lucas car seat on the ground and she takes a step towards him, taking a breath to collect her thoughts, thinking how best to articulate them.

“Opening a portal between realms isn’t easy.” She starts. “The last time I did it took the dark curse and that is not a price I’m willing to pay again.” She says with glance at her sleeping son. “But reopening a portal, that should be easier.”

“And there was a portal in the well.” He says, following what she’s thinking.

“Exactly! Now I know Belle has been collecting all the magical texts she can find and storing them here, there should be something here that can help me find a way to do it and direct it to follow something of Henry or Roland’s, like we did with Emma.” Regina says excitedly.

 

8 hours later, Lucas is fast asleep again in his car seat on the table having been fed not long ago, his mother is passed out next to him, slumped over the book she had been pouring over before her body finally gave in to exhaustion.

“Regina!” Robin shouts excitedly. “Is this it?” He asks hurriedly moving towards the desk with a book in his hands.

Regina looks at him groggily for a minute, momentarily disorientated on waking before she comes to her senses and sits up, looking at the page he has opened the book to.

“I think it might be.” She says, suddenly completely awake and excited.

She flicks through a few more of the pages before finding what they’ve been searching for.

“Yes! This is it!” She says, standing and kissing Robin.

He’s a little taken-a-back, she’s been physically distant from him for a while now when it comes to anything beyond hand-holding, but again he lets it go, it's not the time.

She pulls back, his slight discomfort not unnoticed.

“I need to get to work on this.” She says, picking up the book and making and making a hasty exit from the library towards Gold’s shop.

 

A week passes before Regina can successfully produce all the elements needed. It’s been a week filled with frustration and short tempers as try after try to produce the elements the spell to reopen the portal requires fail repeatedly. Both Robin and Regina are exhausted and on edge and Lucas has been growing fussier by the day as he picks up on the atmosphere. Despite that, they’ve been unwilling to spend any time apart. Not knowing what happened and who or what caused the rest of the town to disappear they both carry the fear that if they were separated the other might somehow disappear too.

 

Late at night in her office, Regina is brewing a potion for what feels like the thousandth time. It’s the last element the book says she’ll need and try after try has failed, she’s running out of ingredients. Robin has fallen asleep in the chair next to her, cradling Lucas securely in his arms.

“Oh my god.” She says quietly, disbelievingly at first. “Oh my god! Robin!” She says, slapping at his arm where he sits asleep.

“What?” He asks tiredly as he stretches his neck out of awkward position it had fallen into.

“It worked!” She tells him, voice full of excitement.

He’s fully awake instantly.

“Are you sure?” He asks, it’s not that he doesn’t have faith in her, but he doesn’t want to get his hopes up only to see them dashed.

“I think so, yes. No, I’m sure! It’s definitely worked. We can go get our boys back!” She tell him with a broad smile.


	39. Chapter 39

Though it kills them, they both agree to wait until dawn before they go to the well and they spend the night getting ready and gathering supplies. 

Robin’s packed two weeks’ worth of formula into a bag along with various other supplies for Lucas. They both agree that taking their son of barely two months into unknown danger is far from ideal but neither is willing to let the other go alone and leaving Lucas alone is obviously out of the question. 

Regina has added magical supplies to the bag, she should be able to use them to reopen the portal a second time and bring everyone home. She’s also included some first aid supplies because they have no idea what they’re going to find and if there’s anything she’s learned from their previous trips to other realms it’s that band aids are a convenience that should be available everywhere. 

They’ve decided that Regina should have Lucas in a baby carrier so her arms are free to wield magic and Robin can’t very well use his bow with a baby strapped to his chest. 

 

Come dawn they’re ready and eager to go. They’ve both changed for the trip, Robin sticking to his usual Storybrooke attire and Regina going for a much more casual look than she normally does, she’s in a purple V-neck sweater, black skinny jeans and most shockingly of all, black lace up sneakers. Robin smiles when he sees her. 

“You’re so much shorter without those heels.” He says, kissing her forehead affectionately. 

“I’m sick of traipsing through the forest in them.” She says with a shrug. “And who knows where we might end up.” 

“I’m glad to see you’re finally favouring comfort.” He says with the same amused but affectionate smile. He was the one who had to listen to how sore her feet were after many a long walk through the woods in those extremely uncomfortable looking shoes of hers. 

“Have we got everything?” She asks, changing the subject. 

“I believe so.” Robin answers, picking up the backpack full of supplies. 

“Ok, here we go.” Regina says as she puts the baby carrier on and moves Lucas into it. He takes a minute or two to adjust but then settles in, gurgling contentedly. He’s been happier since Regina managed to brew the final ingredient seemingly picking up on his mother’s lighter mood. 

She moves her hand over him.

“What was that?” Robin asks.

“Protection spell. Just a little extra insurance.” She tells him. “Ready?” She asks. 

He nods and she uses her magic to transport them to the well, too impatient to walk. 

Regina’s memorized the spell from the book in the library and gets started as soon as they appear at the side of the well, eager to be reunited with her family.  
She uses the ingredients as instructed then recites the incantation and then finally puts both her hands over the well and uses her magic to activate it. 

She’s almost thrown off her feet by the force of portal opening, but Robin is at her back, keeping her upright.

“It worked!” He says excitedly looking down into the well where there’s now a swirling vortex of energy. “Now what?” He asks.

“Now…we jump.” Regina answers somewhat nervously.

Robin takes her hand. 

“We’ll do it together.” He says with a nod. 

They have to let go of each other momentarily to climb over the wall of the well, but they both end up sitting on the wall, legs dangling down towards the portal. 

“On 3.” He says, taking Regina’s hand again. “1, 2, 3.” He counts off and they both push themselves off the wall. 

 

They’re thrown clear through the portal and even as she’s momentarily flying through the air Regina is aware that she needs to land on her back to protect her son. 

They both hit the ground with a thud but Robin is first to recover.

“Regina, are you alright?” He asks, scrambling towards her on his hands and knees. 

She groans but then sits up, checking Lucas over. 

“He’s ok.” She says, relief flooding through her. “The protection spell worked, he’s fine.” She looks at Robin who questions her without saying anything. “We’re both fine.” She clarifies.

“Where are we?” He asks, standing up and looking around as he offers Regina his hand and helps pull her up.

“Oh god.” Regina says looking around. “It didn’t work.” She tells him dejectedly. 

“What are you talking about?” Robin asks, it clear they’re in a different realm.

“This is Lake Nostos.” Regina explains. “What’s left of it anyway. This is where Emma and Mary Margaret opened the portal, it didn’t redirect like it was supposed to, it just reopened exactly the same way.” She says, getting angrier with herself with every word.

“Now wait a minute we don’t know that.” Robin reasons. “It could just mean that they’re here, in the enchanted forest.” 

Regina stands still for a minute, deep in thought. 

“I suppose I could try a locator spell.” She says, realizing Robin might be right. 

“I didn’t think to bring anything of theirs.” Robin says, annoyed with himself. 

Regina smiles knowingly.

“But of course you did.” Robin smiles back. 

Regina walks behind Robin and pulls a baby blanket from his backpack. 

“This was Henry’s.” She explains. 

“Sentimental and practical at the same time.” Robin says with a smile.

“If Henry’s here, this should lead us to him and wherever he is I know he’ll have Roland with him.” She says holding the blanket in one hand and passing the other over it.

Regina looks confused for moment before she waves her hand over the blanket it again.

“What’s wrong?” Robin asks as sees her frustration grow.

“It’s not working!” Regina says.

“You mean they’re not here?” Robin asked, disappointment and concern in his tone.

“No, I mean the spell isn’t working, I can’t cast it.” She says with a growl of frustration.

Robin frowns, using magic has never been a problem for Regina before.

“If they’re here, chances are they’re in the palace perhaps we should just go straight there?” Robin suggests.

Regina grips the blanket in a fist and then waves both hands to transport them to the palace. Nothing happens.

“What the hell?” She asks rhetorically. She looks down to her free hand, brow furrowed in concentration as she tries to form a ball of fire. Nothing happens, not even a spark. 

“Regina?” Robin asks watching her with concern.

“I can’t use magic.” She says, looking at him with shock.


	40. Chapter 40

Robin looks over at Regina as she flexes her fingers trying to form a fireball for what seems like the millionth time. They’ve been walking all day and every so often he sees her try, then hears her growl in frustration or mutter something under her breath. 

“This is unbelievable.” She rages. 

“Maybe you should just think about something else for a while, stop trying to force it.” Robin suggests. 

“How far is it to the palace?” She asks. 

He can’t tell from her tone if she’s ignoring his suggestion or taking his advice. 

“Probably another two days walk.” He guesses. 

“This is ridiculous! We need to find a faster way.” Regina’s frustration is growing by the minute. 

“Well short of some horses just magically appearing in front of us…” Robin trails off as he realizes what he’s said. “If we stick to the main roads we’re bound to run into someone eventually.” He tries to offer some optimism. “Maybe they’ll be able to help us.” 

“Yes. People in this realm are usually desperately eager to help the evil queen.” Regina replies sarcastically. “I don’t even have anything to defend myself with.” 

“You know I won’t let any harm come to you. Either of you.” Robin reassures her. 

“I know.” Regina looks over at Robin. “I do know that. I just hate feeling helpless, especially here.”

Robin reaches out and takes her hand.

“It’ll be dark soon, we should think about setting up camp for the night.” Robin says after a while of walking hand in hand in silence. 

Regina squints looking into the distance along the long straight road they’re walking on. 

“Someone’s coming.” She says. 

“What?” Robin follows her line of sight and then sees it too. 

“Hide.” She says, shoving Robin off to the side of the road. 

He does as she says, realizing she’s probably right, if whoever’s coming isn’t friendly surprise would be their only advantage as much as it pains him to leave the woman he loves and his baby standing defenceless in the middle of the road. 

As the approaching party gets closer, galloping towards them on horseback he counts two people. He sends up a silent prayer that whoever it is intends no harm, as quick as he is with his bow he knows the odds of him taking out both attackers before one of them can get to Regina and Lucas aren’t great. 

He ducks behind a tree for cover ensuring he can’t be seen from the road and he hears the horses slow. 

“Regina!” He hears a familiar voice exclaim. Relief washes over him and he runs out from where he was taking cover. 

Snow is off her horse and embracing Regina, albeit carefully since Lucas is still strapped to her chest. 

“I’m so glad to see you!” Snow says as she holds Regina. 

“Are Henry and Roland here?” Regina asks as she pulls back from the hug. “Are they ok?” 

“They’re both fine.” Snow tells her with a reassuring smile. “They’re back at the palace, they’ve been missing you.” 

David and Robin share a nod as a hello as David dismounts his horse and holds the reigns of both horses. 

“What happened? How did you end up here?” Robin asks as moves to stand next to Regina.

“We’re not exactly sure.” David replies. “But we have a working theory, well, Henry does.” He tells them with an affectionate smile.

“Not that I’m not happy to see you but what are you two doing out here?” Regina asks.

“David thought we should check out Lake Nostos, see if there was anything we could use to open a portal back to Storybrooke.” Snow replies.

“I thought you wanted to come back here?” Regina asks David.

“I did, but Henry and Roland were missing their mom.” He explains. “And there are some other considerations.” 

Regina looks at Snow and David questioningly.

“It’s a long story, one we should tell you when we’ve got everyone together.” David says. “We won’t make it back to the palace tonight but there’s an abandoned village within about hours ride back, we should make it just before nightfall.” 

David hands the reigns of one the horses to Robin and he mounts the other, Snow getting on behind and putting her arms around his waist. Regina gets on the other horse first with Robin sitting behind her with his arms around her. She makes sure Lucas is settled in his carrier and once again thanks the gods that her son is an excellent sleeper. 

 

They get to what’s left of the village just after nightfall. David and Robin take the horses and head off to get the stables supplied for the night.

“We all ended up in the palace grounds.” Snow explains as she stokes a fire in one of the houses and she starts preparing the food she and David had brought with them. “Most people have opted to stay there, like last time.” She says referring to their last return to this realm.

Regina is sitting in a chair, cradling Lucas as she feeds him his formula she’s just heated, watching Snow intently as she talks.

“We realized pretty quickly that you must have been in your vault when it happened and that you were somehow protected. Lucas disappeared right before it happened, it was almost like he knew.” Snow babbles.

“What aren’t you telling me?” Regina asks, narrowing her eyes at Snow.

“I don’t know what you mean.” She replies, trying for an innocent tone.

“You always talk too much when you’re nervous.” Regina tells her.

“I thought I always talked too much according to you.” Snow says with a forced laugh.

“I’ve already figured out for myself it was Rumplestiltskin’s doing.” Regina says. “It’s too big a coincidence him coming for the apprentice’s wand and then this happening.” 

“That’s the general consensus.” Snow admits. 

“Then what?” Regina asks, still sensing that Snow is holding something back.

Snow hesitates for a moment, busying herself with preparing the food before she sighs and turns to Regina.

“At first people seemed happy to be home but within a day they were starting to complain.” Snow explains. “There’s been a vote and almost everyone wants to go back to Storybrooke.” She tells Regina nervously. 

“Well, I just might have a way to make that happen but I’ll need Emma’s help.” Regina replies with a smile. 

“You’re not mad?” Snow asks, sounding almost child-like.

“Why would I be angry?” Regina asks, frowning.

“Because you sent us there as a curse! We weren’t supposed to like it.” Snow replies.

“The curse was never Storybrooke itself.” Regina says with a smile and shake of her head. “Please, like I cursed you to a higher standard of living, sanitation and antibiotics? The curse was how miserable everyone was and that was broken quite a while ago. It was never exactly all it was supposed to be anyway.” 

Snow visibly relaxes. 

“You were really worried about how I’d react to that?” Regina asks.

“A little.” Snow admits 

Regina watches her as she busies herself with cooking. 

“Promise me the boys are alright.” Regina says.

“What?” Snow asks, turning to look at her. 

“I know you’re still hiding something from me, just promise me it’s nothing to do with Henry or Roland and I’ll drop it until you’re ready.” Regina explains.

“I swear to you, they’re both fine.” Snow says solemnly. “Now.” She adds quietly. 

Regina’s eyebrows shoot up at that last word but she trusts Snow at her word.

“Alright then, I’ll wait until tomorrow to find out whatever it is you’re so desperate not to tell me.” Regina says with a nod. 

Snow nervously returns to the cooking as the door to the house open and Robin and David step through.

“Everything alright?” Robin asks, he and David look at each other as they sense a tense atmosphere.

“Fine.” Regina says with a smile. 

 

They eat the meal Snow’s prepared and then head to separate rooms, one of which conveniently has a crib. Regina lies on her side watching Lucas in the crib as Robin spoons up against her back, his arms around her and pulling her close to him. He gently moves her hair to the side and starts kissing her neck. 

He feels her body go rigid and stops.

“I’m not angry or upset.” He whispers. “But eventually we are going to have to talk about this.” He tells her. 

He pulls her close again and settles his head on the pillow to sleep as he feels her start to relax in his arms. 

She doesn’t say anything. Isn’t sure how she can possibly explain her reaction to him. 

She focuses on her son instead, watching the steady rise and fall of his little chest through the bars of the crib and thinking of how in a few short hours she would be reunited with her other two boys. 

Eventually she drifts off to sleep, feeling safe and happy in Robin’s arms.

 

Regina slowly starts to waken, stretching in bed. She notices Robin’s presence is missing, she’s grown used to waking with him holding her or touching her in some way at least. She throws her hand backwards in the direction where he should be and finds and empty space instead.

She rolls over onto her back and as she starts to become more aware, she realizes two things are very wrong. 

First of all, she isn’t where she went to sleep last night. 

And secondly, well, the second thing is making her scared to open her eyes so she reaches with her hand to confirm what she already knows. Her eyes fly open as her hand makes contact with her swollen abdomen and she looks down in horror to find that she has an extremely pregnant belly. 

“Mom!” The door to her room flies open and Henry rushes in. His eyes nearly pop out of his head when he sees his mother. “Whoa!” Their eyes meet and he can see how freaked out his mom is. “I’m guessing you don’t remember what happened either.”

Regina looks from her stomach to her son and back again several times, at a complete loss for words. 

“Regina?” Comes a shout from downstairs, it’s not the voice she wants to hear though.

“Up here.” Henry answers for her, moving further into the room.

Emma, Mary Margaret, David and Hook all run up the stairs. They appear in the doorway to her room and each of them has a similar reaction to Henry upon seeing her. 

“Seriously?” She exclaims. “All of our memories are gone? Again?”


	41. Chapter 41

“Where are the boys?” Regina asks alarmed as she looks at the sea of blank expressions facing her. 

She moves to stand up, hampered somewhat by her expanded abdomen and the fact that to her mind it’s just suddenly appeared. She gets out of bed, stalks towards the door and pushes passed the crowd that’s gathered in her room. She heads down the hallway reaching Lucas’ room first. 

She opens the door and gasps as she finds that her baby son is no longer the baby she remembers. He’s standing in his crib holding the bars in a blue baby grow. He looks up to her and reaches his hands out, a gesture clearly indicating he’s asking to be picked up. 

“Mama.” He cries out.

Regina has him in her arms in an instant and is back out in the hallway heading to Roland’s room. Everyone has followed her down the hallway and they’re all still looking at her with the same bewildered expressions as they see Lucas in her arms. 

She throws open the door to Roland’s room and immediately and visibly relaxes when she sees his mop of curls peeking out from under the covers. 

He stirs at the commotion and sits up in bed, blearily rubbing at his eyes.

“Mama? What’s wrong?” He asks, eyes open and looking up at her properly his eyes widen as he sees the two extremely noticeable changes in his mother and brother. 

“How did we get back here?” He asks, getting up out of bed. 

Regina moves towards him and envelopes him in a one armed hug, balancing Lucas on her hip with an ease that seems practiced.

“Look how big you got.” She says, noting how much taller he is now. 

She looks back to the group who are still standing in the hallway gaping at her. 

“Where’s Robin?” She asks, suddenly feeling a wave of panic washing over her.

“I didn’t see any sign of him on the way over here.” Emma says with a shrug.

“Why wouldn’t he be here?” Regina asks, her voice conveying her rising panic. 

“Roland my lad, how about some breakfast?” Hook is the one to remove the young boy from the situation. 

Roland looks at his mother, he too is starting to wonder why his father isn’t here and the fact his mom is so worried about it isn’t a good sign. He doesn’t remember getting back to Storybrooke and he definitely doesn’t remember how Lucas got to be so big and his mama is having another baby. He looks to Hook and then to his mom and back again. He is hungry though and he’s sure his mama will fix whatever’s wrong. 

Regina gives Hook a grateful look and then reluctantly hands over Lucas when he comes to take him from her arms too. 

“Regina calm down, there’s probably a perfectly reasonable explanation for where Robin is.” Mary Margaret says once Roland is out of the room.

“Really?” Regina asks, voice dripping with sarcasm.

“We can’t start to panic yet, we don’t even know that he’s not in Storybrooke.” Emma tries to calm the situation down.

“We should check with the Merry Men, maybe he came back with them.” David suggests.

“It doesn’t make any sense.” Regina frets, her mind has jumped to the worst possible scenario, she sits awkwardly on Roland’s bed.

“Mom’s right mom.” Henry tries to reassure Regina, sitting next to her and putting an arm around her. 

She leans into his embrace, resting her head against his. 

“You got so big too.” She says with a smile, it hadn’t escaped her notice that her oldest son was now about the same height as her without her heels on. 

Henry smiles back at his mom, glad to see she seemed to be calming down a little. 

“We’ll go look for Robin.” David says indicating to himself, Mary Margaret and Emma.

“Wait, I’ll come with you.” Regina says as she stands up with some difficulty. 

The three of them look at her awkwardly. 

“What?” She asks. 

“It’s just…” Emma starts but trails off. 

“You’re not exactly in any condition to be trailing through the woods.” Mary Margaret finishes.

Regina huffs and opens her mouth, about to argue with them when Henry steps in and speaks before she has the chance.

“Mom, they’re right.” He says with an authority he doesn’t feel. “You need to stay here, Roland will have questions and he and Lucas need their mom. I need my mom. Not to mention you need to look after my new brother or sister too.” 

Regina thinks about arguing but realizes it will be futile.

“Ok, but take Hook with you then.” She says. 

 

They all head downstairs where they find Roland sat on a stool leaning on the island in the kitchen while Killian rifles through the kitchen cupboards with his hook as he holds Lucas in his other arm. 

“Ah, your mother’s here to rescue us.” Killian says to Roland with a smile. “Supplies seem to be a bit short.” He tells Regina. “You probably don’t want to open the refrigerator.” He warns her quietly. 

Henry takes Lucas from Hook.

“Henny!” The child gurgles happily as his big brother holds him. 

“At least someone seems to remember.” Henry says with a laugh. 

“If only he could tell us what happened.” David agrees with a smile. 

“We’ll call as soon we know anything.” Emma says to Regina before she, her parents and Hook make their exit from the house. 

Regina stands rooted to the spot staring after them until Henry puts a hand on her shoulder. 

“It’ll be ok mom.” He tries to reassure her. 

She smiles, moving her hand to hold his where it’s resting on her shoulder. 

“Why don’t you go get dressed and Roland and I will deal with breakfast.” He offers. 

“I love you.” She says, hugging him and then kissing Lucas’s head. She rounds the island and kisses Roland too before taking Henry up on his offer and going back upstairs to get changed. 

She sits on her bed in her room, her arm stretching out to Robin’s side. 

“Where are you?” She asks. 

Her breath is then taken away by what is very distinctly a kick in her abdomen. She’s hardly had time to process the fact that she is currently very pregnant and she’s not at all sure how she feels about it. Her hand instinctively moves to her stomach as she feels the baby moving around, evidently having just woken up. 

She’s been far enough along before to feel movement, but that was different, like bubbles or flutters low in her belly. She can distinguish arms and legs moving now. 

She moves her hand away. 

No point in getting attached, she reasons, it’s bound to end. 

Her focus right now has be Robin. They have to find him. 

The alternative was unthinkable. 

 

 

After a quick shower, Regina found her wardrobe choices were somewhat limited so she ended up wearing a pair of stretchy yoga pants she’d had since Henry was a baby and a tank top with one of Robin’s flannel shirts over it. She found having something that smelled of him on comforting. 

She came back downstairs a while later to find Roland eating pop tarts. 

The disapproving look that she throws Henry’s way is more instinct than conscious thought. 

“There really wasn’t a lot of choice.” Henry says with a shrug.

Regina sniffs the air as she notices a strong odour of air freshener and looks at Henry questioningly.

“You really do not want to open the refrigerator.” He warns, echoing Hooks earlier statement. 

“I guess I should probably clean it out.” Regina says, moving towards it. 

Henry stands between his mother and the offending appliance. 

“No, mom, I’ll deal with it.” Henry says with that same tone of authority he’d used earlier. 

“You shouldn’t have to do that.” Regina argues.

“I want to.” He says. It’s not exactly a lie although saying he wants to clean out whatever it is causing the disgusting odour he experienced earlier is a not exactly the truth, he definitely does not want his mother to have to deal with it. “Besides, we’re going to have to go to the store there’s literally nothing for this little guy to eat.” 

Regina momentarily breathes a sigh of relief that she’s raised a son sensible enough not to try and feed the baby a pop tart. 

She looks down at herself, even with Robin’s oversized shirt on there’s no mistaking her current condition. The thought of people asking her about it does not appeal to her in the slightest. 

Henry senses her apprehension. 

“Mom, you can’t hide in here.” He tells her. 

“Are there any more?” Roland asks as he appears at their sides with an empty plate.

“Sorry, that was it.” Henry answers.

“But I’m still hungry.” Roland says with a pout.

Some things haven’t changed Regina things with a rueful smile, glad to see events haven’t affected Roland’s appetite.

“Can we go to Granny’s?” Roland asks with a smile. 

“Sure.” Regina says reluctantly. “I’m not sure her kitchen will have fared much better though.” 

“Let’s go get ready.” Henry says, handing Lucas back to his mother and leading Roland upstairs. 

 

 

Henry leads the way into Granny’s holding Lucas in his arms, the baby’s still in the same outfit he was in this morning, it was the only thing they had that fit him. Roland’s in some of Henry’s old clothes, his own too small for him and Henry managed to find a pair of jeans that had been too big for him when his mom bought them and has and ill-fitting t-shirt on. Regina follows them in in her own ill-fitting outfit. 

Thankfully there’s hardly anyone in the diner and after a second they all realize why, the stench of rotting food is nearly overwhelming. 

Leroy is sitting at the counter and turns to the door as the bell chimes. 

He’s on his feet once he realizes who it is that’s entering.

“Am I glad to see you, maybe we can start to get some-” He stops mid-sentence as he takes in Regina’s appearance. “Whoa.” He says, eyes widening when he sees her belly. “Answers.” He finishes. 

“Once again, I’m just as clueless as you.” Regina says, choosing to ignore his reaction. 

“Is that Regina?” She hears Granny’s voice from the kitchen. “I could use a little magical assistance to deal with this mess.” She says as she walks out of the kitchen to behind the counter. She takes in Regina’s appearance without missing a stride. “Well, I see you’ve been busy in the last year and bit.” She says with a smirk. “Don’t suppose you could help me out with the kitchen?” She asks.

Regina looks at her hand nervously.

“The last thing I remember is Robin and I arriving in the enchanted forest and I couldn’t use magic.” She explains. 

“You came to the enchanted forest?” Henry asks. 

“Of course we did, we had to find you and Roland.” Regina explains.

“Mom couldn’t use her magic either.” Henry tells her. 

“Do you have magic now?” Granny asks impatiently.

“I don’t know, I haven’t tried since I woke up.” Regina answers truthfully. 

She looks down at her hand, focusing on trying to conjure a flame. A few sparks come first, then nothing. Regina shakes her head, narrowing her eyes in concentration and suddenly a flame erupts in her hand. She smiles widely. 

“I did it.” She grins.

“I know the smells bad but I was hoping it wouldn’t come to torching the place.” Granny says sarcastically. 

Regina gives her a sideways look before she closes her eyes and stretches her hand out in front of her, slowly turning until she’s cleaned up the whole diner magically. She frowns, it’s taking a lot more concentration than she’s used to, she feels rusty almost.

“I could kiss you.” Granny says with a smile, taking a deep breath of the now clear air. “I’ll get you some breakfast, have a seat.” She says, disappearing into the kitchen. Leroy is unceremoniously summoned into the kitchen a short while later. 

“What’s the last thing you remember?” Regina asks Henry and Roland and she sits across from them in a booth. Henry has kept a hold of Lucas, sitting him on his lap. 

“We were in the palace, Grandma and Grandpa had gone to try and find a way home and mom was getting really annoyed she couldn’t use her magic.” Henry recalls.

“I hurted my head.” Roland says with smile, pointing to a spot on his hairline. 

Regina squinted, now that he’d pointed it out she could see the faint trace of a scar there. 

“Now I have a line like yours mama.” Roland says proudly pointing to the scar on her upper lip. 

Regina smiled at her son while inwardly cringing, she didn’t like to think about how she got that scar. 

“What happened to your head baby?” She asks. 

“I fell.” Roland says with a shrug. 

She notices Henry shifting in his seat as if he’s uncomfortable with where the conversation is going. 

As if on cue his cell phone rings. 

“Hello?” He answers. 

Regina watches him, wondering what it is she’s not been told. Snow was acting suspiciously last night too. Well, it was last night to her anyway. 

“We’re in Granny’s.” She hears Henry say. “See you soon.” 

“Are they coming here?” Regina asks, she’s figured out it was one of the charming’s on the other end of the phone. 

“Yeah.” Henry says.

“Did they find him?” She asks anxiously.

“They didn’t say.” He answers truthfully but they both know that’s an answer in itself.

He can practically hear her mind going into overdrive. 

“Mom, stay calm, it doesn’t mean anything.” Henry tries his best to reassure her. 

The door opens and Mary Margaret, David, Emma and Hook enter trying their best not to look to forlorn. 

Regina’s on her feet and meeting them halfway across the diner before they have a chance to say anything.

“Well, did they know anything?” She asks none of them in particular.

“They don’t remember seeing him.” David answers.

“There was no sign of him out there.” Emma continues.

“Oh god.” Regina starts to pace the diner. 

Henry takes that as his cue to get his little brother out of there. Roland’s looking at their mom with concern etched on his face. He takes him to the kitchen under the guise of ‘helping Granny with breakfast’. 

“Regina, we don’t know anything for sure.” Mary Margaret tries to calm her. 

“Don’t we?” Regina asks, continuing to pace. “He’s not here.”

“We’ve not found him yet that’s all.” Emma tries next.

“No. There’s no reason he wouldn’t have been with me.” Regina’s mind is firmly stuck on the worst possible scenarios. “How did we get back here?” She asks, knowing they don’t know the answer either. “What if I cast the curse again?” She asks, nearing hysteria. “What if I killed him?”


	42. Chapter 42

_14 Months Earlier_

Both couples rise early the next day, setting off back to the palace not long after dawn. It’s a long and thankfully uneventful ride. 

They make it back to the palace just before nightfall, having had to stop at various points along the way to allow Regina and Robin to tend to Lucas.

They ride up to the front door of the castle, passing several familiar faces along the way who greet them with smiles.

“Where are the boys?” Regina asks anxiously as they dismount the horses. 

A look passes between Snow and David and he reaches out and takes the reigns from Robin.

“I’ll stable the horses.” David gives Snow a nod. 

“What’s going on?” Robin asks, his own anxiety building now. 

“I need both of you to stay calm.” Snow says, her voice measured, her palms up in a calming gesture. 

“Why are you telling me to stay calm? People only say that when there’s a reason for me not to be calm.” Regina replies, there’s a bite to her tone.

Robin puts an arm around her shoulder.

“Just tell us what’s going on, what we’re imagining is probably much worse.” Robin says calmly, much more calmly than he feels. 

“Ok.” Snow takes a deep breath. “It’s Roland.” She tells them. “He got hurt the day after we arrived.” 

“Hurt how?” Regina asks. “Where is he?” She moves towards the palace entrance. 

“He’s ok now.” Snow tries to reassure them. “I’ll take you to him.” She turns and begins leading them through the palace.

“What happened?” Robin asks as they walk through the halls.

“He fell.” Snow explains. “He went exploring with Henry and somehow ended up on one of the walls in the north garden.” 

“They’re over six feet high!” Regina exclaims, her alarm growing. 

“How badly was he injured?” Robin asks.

“He broke his arm.” Snow replies. “And he hit his head.” She continues. “He seemed fine at first but then he lost consciousness.” 

“He what?” Robin is now every bit as anxious as Regina.

“He was out for a day but he’s come around now and he’s fine.” Snow explains with a forced smile. “He’s in here, he’s still been quite tired.” Snow indicates to a door. “Here, I’ll take Lucas while you see him.” She reaches out for the baby.

Regina takes Lucas from the carrier and hands him to Snow, unhooking the carrier and passing it to her. 

Robin and Regina are then through the door in an instant, rushing toward their son. 

“Mama! Papa!” Roland cries out, reaching his uninjured arm out to them from where he lies in bed. 

They each sit at one side of the bed, embracing the boy in an awkward three way hug. 

“My boy, I’m so glad you’re alright.” Robin holds him tight. 

“Let me see.” Regina sits back first, pushing his unruly hair back and looking at the messy wound sitting just at his hairline. 

“Mama kiss it better?” Roland asks.

Regina smiles and places a tender kiss just next to the wound. 

“Oh I’ve missed you.” She hugs him to her again. 

“Mom!” 

Regina turns to the sound of the voice but before she can even turn her head she feels the force of her oldest son running into her and hugging her. 

“I’m sorry.” Henry says into her shoulder. 

“What?” Regina asks with a frown. 

“I’m so sorry.” Henry repeats, pulling back from his mother. “Mom, Robin, it’s all my fault. I should have been watching Roland closer, I should have taken better care of him.” 

“Nonsense my boy.” Robin reaches out to put a reassuring hand on Henry’s arm. “Accidents happen.” He tells him sincerely. “Besides, Roland knows better than to go climbing on something so high.” He addresses the younger boy in a slightly admonishing tone. 

“Yes papa, I’m sorry.” Roland says shyly. “I just wanted to see if I could find you and mama from up there.” 

“Well we’re here now and you’re alright, that’s all that matters.” Regina holds both boys. 

Snow clears her throat in the doorway, gently rocking Lucas back and forth. 

“When you’re ready, a council meeting’s been called.” She informs them. 

Regina rolls her eyes and looks at Robin. 

“We just got here.” Regina says, but there’s an air of resignation in her tone. 

“I know.” Snow sympathises. “People are anxious. What happened with Roland just reinforced how much better off we were in Storybrooke with modern medicine. A lot of people are scared.” 

“Fine.” Regina sighs. “We’ll be there in a minute.” She looks at Robin again. 

He gives her a lopsided smile in response.

“Henry, can you look after your brothers please?” Robin asks. 

Henry looks shocked for a minute that he’s being trusted with such a thing after what happened with Roland, but quickly shakes it off and smiles. “Sure.”

“Thank you, there’s formula and diapers in the bag.” Robin tells him, indicating the bag he’d shrugged off the moment he’d reached Roland’s side. 

“I’ll take good care of them, I promise.” Henry solemnly tells them, taking his younger brother from his grandmother’s arms. 

Regina kisses Roland’s forehead. “See you soon baby.” She tells him, then turns to Henry, kissing Lucas on the head and then finally Henry. “I know you will.” She tells him with a smile. 

Then she and Robin follow Snow out of the room and towards the council chambers. 

“Thank you for that.” Regina says to Robin. 

“For what?” He asks with a frown. 

“Showing Henry you still trust him.” She replies, moving closer to him and snaking an arm around his back to rest on the opposite hip, pulling him close as they walk. He puts an arm around her shoulder in response. 

“I meant it, accidents do happen and there’s no permanent damage done, his arm will heal and us Locksley’s are hard headed.” He tells her with a smile. 

“Don’t I know it.” She replies with a quiet laugh.

“I’m sorry we didn’t tell you about Roland right away.” Snow drops back to walk side by side with the couple. “It’s just, we know how you are with them and if we’d told you you’d have been riding through the pitch dark to get back.” 

Regina takes a breath to speak but before she can Robin speaks first.

“We understand your concern.” He acknowledges her intentions. “And appreciate that you were trying to look out for us, but in future, if any of our children are injured we’d appreciate knowing about it straight away.” He tells politely just as they enter the council chamber. 

Regina looks at him, by Robin’s standards that was practically an angry outburst.

“Am I glad to see you sister.” Leroy greets Regina first. “And you brother.” He adds as an afterthought.

“I knew you’d find a way here.” Granny smiles. 

“It’s good to see you.” Emma looks relieved.

“Your majesty.” Hook even manages a smile. 

Regina feels a little overwhelmed, she’s really not used to so many people apparently being so happy to see her, especially not in this palace. 

Robin gives her shoulder a gentle, reassuring squeeze and then moves them in the direction of the table. 

Everyone else in the room follows suit, sitting down too, as if on cue, David enters the room and takes his seat next to Snow. 

“I guess we should get started then.” Snow begins. 

“What? No sanctimonious fairies?” Regina asks.

“No one’s seen Blue or the others since we got here.” David answers. 

“Oh.” Is all Regina manages as her mind starts to work over that piece of information. 

“Regina and I have already discussed the theory that Rumplestiltskin is behind our return here and she agrees that’s the most likely explanation.” Snow explains to the group. 

“Well now that we’ve stated the obvious, can we move on to how she and Robin got here?” Leroy asks, living up to his other moniker.

“I was able to reopen the portal Snow and Emma travelled back through.” Regina explains. 

“That’s great, can you do it again so we can all go home?” David asks eagerly. 

“I brought all the ingredients I need for the spell to do it.” Regina explains. “But…” She hesitates for moment, old habits die hard and she hates to expose her weakness. “I haven’t been able to use magic since we got here.” She finally admits. “But Emma could do it, it’s a relatively simple spell once you have all the components.” She stops talking when she sees the looks on the groups’ faces. “What?” 

“I haven’t been able to use magic either.” Emma replies. “It’s why I couldn’t heal Roland.” 

“Oh.” Regina says again. 

“Yeah.” Emma winces.

“I thought travelling between this realm and that one was supposed to be difficult, that’s why the crocodile and then Snow had to use the dark curse?” Hook asks. 

“Both those times it was a realm without magic.” Regina tells them, as if the explanation is obvious. 

The group looks at her with confused expressions, clearly needing more information.

“Storybrooke is still there and it still has magic, so it’s like travelling to any other magical realm. It’s not easy, but it’s certainly easier and there should be no need for any dark curse.” She explains. “Of course, without magic it doesn’t really matter either way.” She adds.

“So we’re stuck here?” Leroy asks.

“Unless we can find a way for either of us to get our magic back.” Regina says. 

“Maybe we’re going about this the wrong way.” David suggests.

“What do you mean?” Robin asks.

“Well, we’re focussed on getting back but maybe if we figure out why Gold did this in the first place we might be able to figure out how to undo it.” David reasons.

“I hate to say it but shepherd boy might have a point.” Regina admits.

“Does the crocodile even need a reason?” Hook asks.

“Rumple’s never done anything that wasn’t designed to suit his own best interest.” Regina replies, her mind is working to piece together the puzzle as she speaks. “You said the fairies are missing, is there anyone else from Storybrooke who didn’t appear in the palace?” She asks.

“No one’s seen Belle either.” Emma tells her.

“That’s what this is all about.” Regina shakes her head. 

“He transported the entire town to another realm in attempt to fix his relationship problems?” Hook asks sceptically.

“I thought they were getting along better?” David asks, he’s not exactly been in the loop on the goings on between Belle and Gold.

“They were but about two weeks ago she came to the bed and breakfast and took a room indefinitely. She was upset but she wouldn’t talk about it.” Granny tells them. 

“She must have found out he was the dark one again.” Snow surmises. 

“She did, aye.” Hook admits.

All eyes turn to him with questioning looks.

“She had a right to know.” He says defensively. 

Emma rolls her eyes, realizing she may never truly understand his undying need for revenge against ‘the crocodile’. 

“How does bringing everybody back here help him with Belle though?” David asks. 

“He’s trying to recreate it, how they fell in love the first time.” Regina reasons. 

“Ok, well, that’s insane. He’s kidnapped her again?” Emma asks. “Can you even get Stockholm syndrome twice?” 

“She’s in danger, if he doesn’t get what he wants, who knows what he’ll do to her?” Robin’s alarmed. He better than most knows the wrath of the dark one. 

“He won’t hurt her.” Regina’s confident in that. 

“How can you be so sure?” Snow asks. 

“He loves her, at least he thinks he does, whatever his twisted version of that is.” She explains. “The problem is he’ll do whatever he thinks he has to to hold onto her.” 

“We can’t just leave her there with him, she clearly didn’t go willingly.” Emma argues. 

“I would think carefully about taking on the dark one even with my magic, without it, it’s a suicide mission.” Regina cautions her. 

“It’s possible to survive an encounter with the dark one without magic.” Robin counters. He’s told her all about his previous encounter with her mentor. 

“Yes, but you had help.” Regina replies.

 

“From Belle!” Robin argues. “Who’s to say she can’t help again.” 

“It’s too risky, we need more information.” Regina tells him.

Across the table from her, Snow lowers her head, trying to hide a smile.

“What?” Regina asks, distracted by the slightly smug smile on Snow’s face.

“Nothing.” Snow replies, catching herself. “It’s just, usually it’s us trying to talk you out of the insanely reckless plan, not the other way around.” 

“I guess things change.” Regina replies. 

“I guess they do.” Snow agrees, a wistful smile still present. “Regina’s right.” She’s addressing the group. “We need to find out more, this is all just a theory.”

“First priority has to be getting our magic back.” Emma agrees. “Maybe Merlin can help?” She suggests.

The group all turn to look at her. 

“Except I put him back in a tree.” She admits with a slightly embarrassed look.

“And without magic, he’ll remain stuck there.” Regina says. “I doubt a tree will be much help.”

“So what can we do?” Snow asks.

“I don’t know.” Regina admits. “It’s not like when there was no magic in Storybrooke, it’s here, I can still feel it but…” She trails off searching for the right way to articulate what she was feeling. 

“It’s like something’s blocking you accessing it.” Emma finishes for her.

“Exactly.” Regina agrees.

“Maybe we just need to practice more?” Emma suggests.

“Perhaps.” Regina is sceptical, she knows the dark one is behind this.


	43. Chapter 43

_Storybrooke_

“Regina calm down, there’s no reason to think that the dark curse was involved.” Mary Margaret is trying her best to comfort a near hysterical Regina.

“Isn’t there?” Regina asks, eyes filled with unshed tears. 

“No, there isn’t. You wouldn’t do that, not ever.” Mary Margaret puts an arm around Regina’s shoulders and guides her to sit down at one of the tables. “Now you need to calm down or you’ll end up going into labor.” 

Regina takes a few deep breaths, doing her best to regain control of her emotions. 

“Where is he?” She asks Mary Margaret, almost pleading and she hates how vulnerable she feels without him at her side. 

“We’ll find him, I swear.” Mary Margaret vows.

Leroy bursts through the front door of the diner, causing Regina to look towards the kitchen she’d seen him enter not long before.

“Belle’s in the hospital!” Leroy shouts his announcement from the doorway.

“What?” David asks.

“When everyone appeared back, they found her in the ER unconscious, she’s got some kind of infection, apparently it’s pretty bad.” He tells them what he’s overheard. 

“Leroy, did you get any of what I sent you for?” Granny asks as she emerges from the kitchen to see what all the shouting is about, her annoyance is obvious, she’d sent him for groceries not gossip. 

“I thought they’d want to know about this straight away!” Leroy replies defensively. 

“Did they find anyone else at the hospital?” Regina asks, trying to keep the hope out of her voice.

“They didn’t mention anyone else.” Leroy replies with a shrug.

“We should go.” Regina stands up. “Maybe Belle remembers something we don’t.” 

“Ok.” Mary Margaret agrees. 

Regina looks over to Granny. 

“Don’t worry, I’ve got them.” Granny tells her, meaning the boys. 

“Thank you.” Regina nods.

 

 

They head out of Granny’s and split up into two cars Mary Margaret, David and Regina in David’s truck, Emma and Hook in one of the Sherriff’s cars. 

Regina sits at the passenger side, with Mary Margaret in the middle and David driving, she’s nervously wringing her hands, mind racing with thoughts about Robin’s whereabouts. 

Mary Margaret reaches out and places her hand over both of Regina’s to still them.

“I meant it, we’ll find him.” She tells Regina sincerely.

“Anything could have happened.” Regina replies. “There’s so much time we don’t remember, he could have died a year ago for all we know!” Regina’s getting more upset the more she talks.

“He was clearly still around about 8 or 9 months ago.” Mary Margaret smiles, indicating towards Regina’s bump with her eyes. 

Regina doesn’t answer, instead turning her head to look out of the window as they drive, mind overwhelmed with the possibilities. Anything could have happened, something as trivial as a paper cut could end up being lethal in the enchanted forest.

They arrive at the hospital and Regina is torn from her introspection.

They’re quickly shown to Belle’s room by a nurse to find that Leroy had been understating things for once. 

Belle’s on a ventilator, hooked up to multiple IV’s and so pale she’s practically blending into the sheets. 

“Oh my god.” Mary Margaret gasps.

Whale appears in the room behind them having been informed about their dramatic entrance into the hospital.

“It looks like she’s been shot with an arrow.” Whale explains to them. “The wound has become terribly infected and it’s spread throughout her body, her organs are shutting down. We’re giving her antibiotics but I fear we may have gotten to her too late.” He explains before ducking out of the room.

“We have to help her.” Emma declares.

“You know it comes with a price.” Regina warns, unconsciously putting a hand over her stomach protectively.

“I have to try.” Emma puts her hands out over Belle’s body and closes her eyes to concentrate. Light comes from her hands but nothing happens to Belle. Emma looks up at Regina in confusion. “Something’s stopping me.” 

Regina tuts, assuming Emma’s poorly controlled skills are the cause. She assumes the same position Emma had a moment before but from the opposite side of the bed. 

The same thing happens.

“There’s a protection spell.” Regina frowns. “It’s stopping magic being used on her.” She explains. “And I think I was the one who cast it.”


	44. Chapter 44

_Enchanted Forest_

A week passes and they’re no further forward. The palace has settled into a routine, people reluctantly accepting they’re going to be stuck in this realm. It’s a strange situation that this realm that was once home to most is now a prison of sorts and the realm that was meant to be a prison is where they long to be. 

Regina is on edge, the thought of being trapped here weighing heavily on her mind. 

She’s hovering around the entrance to the kitchens, watching Granny work from the shadows, reluctant to enter. 

“Are you going to stand there all day or are you going to come in and get whatever it is off your chest?” Granny grumbles. 

Damn her wolf hearing, Regina thinks as she enters the kitchen. 

“Well?” Granny asks, hands on hips looking at her expectantly.

“I need your help.” Regina finally admits. 

“Well, I guess there is a first time for everything.” Granny laughs. 

“Forget it.” Regina turns on her heel and heads back towards the entrance.

“Wait.” Granny calls after her.

Regina stops in her tracks.

“I’m sorry.” Granny says sincerely. “I know how much you hate asking for help, I shouldn’t have laughed.” 

Regina turns back towards her. 

“What can I do for you?” Granny asks. 

“I wondered if you knew, before, in the villages, if a mother died or couldn’t feed her baby for some reason, what did they do?” Regina asks, stumbling over her words, unsure of herself.

Granny narrows her eyes.

“We only brought enough formula for two weeks.” Regina answers her unasked question.

“And he’s too little to wean.” Granny nods. “Well, we can try to find him a wet nurse.” 

“I can’t imagine there will be too many woman tripping over themselves to help me.” Regina’s face falls, dejected. 

“Maybe, maybe not. You’re not the same person you were and a lot of people have come to realize that.” Granny tries to offer some comfort. 

“Do you know anyone?” Regina asks hopefully. 

“Why yes, just let me consult my list of nursing mothers here.” Granny replies sarcastically. “I’ll put the word out.” She adds with more compassion. 

“Thank you.” Regina says sadly, she doesn’t feel much better after this conversation, worried her baby will starve to death. She turns to leave again.

“There’s another option you know.” Granny stops her in her tracks again.

“I’m listening.” Regina turns back to look at her. 

“You could feed him.” Granny tells her. 

“What? How?” Regina asks, perplexed by the suggestion. “There’s no magic, I can’t just turn them on.” She waves her hand over her chest. 

“You don’t need magic.” Granny gently laughs. “There’s a tea I can brew for you for that starts things off and then nature will take over.” 

“Are you sure it won’t need magic?” Regina asks uncertainly, not wanting to get her hopes up.

“I’m quite sure.” Granny replies. “A lot of things that were called magical here would be classed as scientific in Storybrooke I think, there’s something in the herbs.” She tells her with a smile. 

“When can we do this?” Regina asks, eager to get started.

“Come back in an hour.” Granny replies. “And bring Lucas with you.” 

Regina turns to leave but instead loiters in the doorway.

“Spit it out.” Granny has her back is to the door and she doesn’t look up from the pot she’s stirring. 

“Why are you helping me?” Regina asks hesitantly.

“Who says I am? In this case helping you is helping him.” Granny replies.

Regina can’t read the tone of her voice.

“It’s more than that, you’ve shown me kindness.” Regina persists.

“Like I said, you’re not the person you once were.” There’s a pause before she continues. “I may be old, but I’m not stupid, I always knew there was more to the story than what Snow told people, it seemed less important when you were ransacking villages though.”

Regina looks at her oddly, eyes narrowed, with suspicion almost.

Granny can somehow read her like a book.

“Oh don’t worry, nobody’s speaking out of turn, but like I said, I’m not stupid, I’ve worked some of it out for myself.” Granny tells her. “Seems to me you’ve been punished plenty for your crimes and you’re doing your best to redeem yourself, it’s not my place to judge you.”

“Thank you.” Regina says sincerely. 

 

 

Regina spends the next few days with Granny helping her to nurse, it’s not easy, but she’s never been one to give up on something just because it’s difficult, not to mention she knows there’s not a lot of options. Within three days, Lucas is getting what he needs from his mother and no longer needing topped up with formula. 

Regina hadn’t told Robin what she’d been doing spending so much time doing in the kitchens with Granny so when he enters their chambers to find Regina feeding their son he’s slightly taken aback. 

“How is that possible?” He asks with smile as he takes in the sight.

“Granny had a tea that helped bring the milk in.” Regina answers, smiling back at him. 

It had been a strange and not altogether pleasant sensation at first but now she’s really enjoying the feeling of closeness it’s bringing her and Lucas. 

Robin stands staring at Regina nursing their son, a goofy grin plastered to his face.

“What?” Regina asks, becoming self-conscious.

“Nothing.” Robin replies, trying to shake himself from his reverie. “I just don’t think I’ve ever seen anything more beautiful. I don’t think I’ve seen you looking so beautiful.” He tells her, walking over and giving her a quick kiss on the lips. 

“You’re just glad this means you don’t have to get up through the night anymore.” Regina laughs. 

“No.” Robin replies, turning to get ready for bed. “That’s just an added bonus.”


	45. Chapter 45

_Storybrooke_

“Well can you turn it off?” Emma asks as she and Regina stand and opposite sides of Belle’s hospital bed. 

“I’m not sure.” Regina admits. She holds her hands out over Belle again and focuses on reversing the protection spell. 

It’s a struggle, but eventually, she manages to do it, it’s taken far more out of her than she’d like to admit however and she involuntarily stumbles backwards. David is the one to steady her and that just reminds her of Robin’s unexplained absence. 

“Try now.” Regina instructs Emma. 

Emma put hers hands out again and concentrates, white light emanates from her hands and spreads through Belle’s body, instantly her color markedly improves.

“Why isn’t she waking up?” Hook asks.

“I’m pretty sure they have to sedate you when they put you on a ventilator, the doctors will have to wake her up.” Emma explains with the limited medical knowledge she’d gained from TV.

Everyone is startled when a cell phone starts to ring, Regina pulls hers from her pocket.

“Henry?” She answers.

No one else in the room can hear what Henry is saying.

“Did you call an ambulance?” She asks, the alarm in her voice evident.

The groups focus turns to Regina immediately. 

“Ok, we’ll be right there.” She hangs up. 

“Emma, we need to get to Granny’s now!” She says, the implication clear that she doesn’t trust her own magic enough to transport the group. 

Within seconds they appear in the diner. 

“Henry?” Emma calls out. 

“In here.” Henry calls out from the kitchen, the terror in his voice is obvious. 

“What happened?” Regina asks as the group rushes in.

Granny is lying unconscious on the floor, Henry hovering over her. Roland is sitting well back from the commotion on the floor with Lucas keeping him occupied and away from the dangers in the kitchen. 

Snow drops to her knees next to Granny as does Emma. Hook scoops up Lucas and hands him to Regina as Roland runs to his mother for comfort. 

“I don’t know, one minute she was fine and then she was holding her chest and she collapsed. I called 911 but they said there was no one to send right now with the confusion of everyone just arriving back.” Henry’s talking quickly and he’s panicked.

“You did the right thing.” Regina reassures him.

“She has a pulse.” Emma reports. “But it’s weak.”

“We need to get her to the hospital.” Snow states the obvious. 

“Emma, go.” Regina urges Emma to use her magic again.

Emma, Granny, Snow, David and Hook all disappear back to the hospital in an instant. 

“Mom, why didn’t you use your magic?” Henry asks with a frown.

“It doesn’t feel right.” Regina articulates the feeling as best she can. “I don’t know how to explain it, but I feel like I can’t trust it right now.” She shakes her head. “Come on, we should get to the hospital and find out how Granny is.”

 

 

They arrive at the hospital the old fashioned way to find the worried group huddled together in a waiting room. 

“Well?” Regina asks impatiently as they all turn to look at her.

“They think it’s her heart.” Snow tells her with a worried look. 

Regina feels her own heart sink at the news. 

“She’s a tough old bird, it’ll take more than that to bring her down.” Hook says, trying to lift everyone’s spirits. 

A silence falls over the group as everyone sits and waits for news. 

 

 

Hours later, the group is still waiting for news. Emma stands and moves seats to sit next to Regina, Roland’s fallen asleep with his head in his mother’s lap, Henry has taken Lucas over to where his grandparents and Hook are sitting. Doc dropped off Neal with his parents a while ago, David has him in his lap while Snow dotes on the younger infant. It briefly crosses Regina’s mind to try and define Lucas’s relationship to Snow but she quickly dismisses the thought as far too complicated and for another day. 

“Hey.” Emma says quietly as she takes the chair next to Regina. 

“Hey.” Regina replies, eyeing her suspiciously as she continues running her hands through Roland’s hair. 

“I’ve been thinking.” Emma begins.

“That’s usually dangerous.” Regina quips.

Emma ignores her. 

“Did you try a locator spell for Robin?” Emma asks.

“No, I haven’t exactly had a chance.” Regina replies. “And…” She trails off. 

“And what?” Emma prompts.

“There’s something, I don’t know, off, with my magic.” Regina tells her. 

“Off how?” Emma asks.

“I don’t know.” Regina admits. “I don’t even know how to properly explain it.”

Emma ponders for a moment. 

“Do you think it could have something to do with your current condition.” Emma asks, gesturing to her very pregnant stomach. 

“I have no idea.” Regina answers truthfully. “I guess it’s possible, I’ve never been this pregnant before.” She sounds unconvinced as she says it, she may not know what the problem is, but she doesn't think it's that.

“So what do you think?” Emma asks. “About the locator spell?”

“I think it’s worth a shot.” Regina replies, feeling a bit of hope stir within her. 

“Ok, we’ll go get started.” Emma stands up and heads over towards her parents, Henry and Hook. 

She informs them of the plan to try a locator spell. There’s lots of hushed talking that Regina can’t make out before they’re all on their feet and approaching her.

“We’re all going to go and look for Robin.” Snow tells Regina, still in a hushed tone, mindful of Roland sleeping. 

“I’m going to stay here and wait for news about Granny.” Regina says firmly. “And Belle.” She adds as an afterthought. 

They all look at her with surprise. 

“What? You made it abundantly clear you weren’t going to take me on any search parties earlier.” She doesn’t try to hide the annoyance in her tone. “Besides, someone should be here for her, she doesn’t really have anyone since Ruby left.” 

“I didn’t think you were that close.” Emma can’t hide the surprise and confusion in her voice.

“Neither did I.” Regina admits, she had surprised herself with the strength of the concern she’s feeling for Granny. 

“Maybe it’s like when we got sent back before, you told me you felt like you knew Robin before you could remember. Feelings are stronger than memories, maybe you two grew closer over the last year.” Snow suggests. 

“Perhaps.” Regina says sceptically. 

“We’ll take Neal back to Doc.” David decides. “We could take Lucas and Roland too.” He offers.

“No.” Regina’s answer is quick and harsher than she means it to be. “Thank you. I just, I’d like to have them close.”

“Ok.” David smiles, understanding how she feels. 

“I’ll stay with my mom.” Henry tells them. 

“Please call if you find anything.” Regina pleads. 

“Of course.” Snow offers a reassuring smile.


	46. Chapter 46

_Enchanted Forest - 1 month later_

“I have a bit of a headache, why don’t you go without me.” Regina calls across the room to Robin from where she sits at her dressing table. Very slowly and reluctantly getting ready for the grand ball the Charming’s had insisted on throwing.

“Regina.” Robin sighs. “Tell me what you’re really thinking.”

“Fine. I don’t want to do this.” Regina sits staring into the mirror.

“Then we won’t.” Robin appears behind her and puts his hands reassuringly on her shoulders. “But you can be the one to tell Snow.” He adds with a hint of mischief in his voice.

Regina visibly deflates at his words and he realizes the words he had intended in jest have caused her upset.

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” He vows to her.

She turns around on the stool she’s sitting on, so she’s facing Robin.

“She won’t understand.” Regina sighs sadly. “She never understood.”

“Understood what?” Robin asks with a frown, as far as he knew, the two women were getting along much better these days.

Regina hesitates, looking down to her hands where they rest in her lap and Robin kneels before her, cupping her face in his hand and gently lifting her face to look at him.

“You can tell me anything, you know that.” He tells her solemnly.

“It just makes me sound like a petulant child if I say it out loud.” Regina tells him.

“I doubt that very much, tell me my love.” Robin urges, dropping his hand from her face and putting over hers.

Regina sighs again.

“I never wanted this life.” She admits quietly. “I never wanted to be queen. I hate all this, the balls and state dinners, everyone staring and scrutinizing, I can’t stand it, this feeling of being on display. I spent my whole childhood with my mother watching me and judging everything I did and then I finally got away from her and the King and his court were exactly the same. I was never good enough and I’m not good enough now, all anyone will ever see is the evil queen.”

“That’s not true my love.” Robin assures her. “Tell me, what did you want?” He asks.

“All I ever wanted was to be happy.” She smiles ruefully. “Daniel and I had it all planned out, we would marry and have five or six children and we would have our own stables and everything would be rainbows and unicorns. I was just a foolish child then.”

“It doesn’t sound foolish to me.” Robin gives her hand a reassuring squeeze. 

“I think you’re slightly biased.” She replies with another rueful smile. “What did you want your life to be when you were young?” She asks, eager to change the subject but also genuinely curious, he’s never spoken much of his childhood.

“I don’t know, I suppose when I was very young I thought I would inherit my father’s title and lands and be married off to an appropriate bride.” He answers, lost in thought.

“But is that what you wanted?” Regina pushes.

“I never supposed it would matter what I wanted, it was just what was.” He pauses. “Certainly the life of an outlaw was not one I’d dreamed of but the freedom that came with it, I think I’d always craved that.”

Regina nods in agreement, they may have gone about it in completely different ways, but they’d both be seeking the freedom to determine their own lives. 

“I’ll go and tell Snow you’re not feeling well and that I’m staying to look after you.” He tells her.

“You shouldn’t have to miss the festivities because of me.” Regina protests.

“Grand balls were never really my cup of tea either.” He admits. “I’ll ask Emma to keep an eye on Henry and Roland.” He adds.

 

 

Robin leaves the room to deliver the news to a disappointed Snow and briefly speaks to Emma, he’s quite sure they’re both more than suspicious of Regina’s sudden illness but neither pushes the issue. 

 

 

He returns to his and Regina’s room to find her sitting up in bed, gently rocking Lucas to sleep. He moves towards her, utilising his thief skill set to do silently so as not to disturb Lucas. He’s almost at the bed before he sees the tears silently streaming down Regina’s face.

“Regina?” He asks, alarmed. “What’s wrong?”

She startles at his voice, she’d been so lost in thought she hadn’t even noticed him come in. 

“Nothing.” She lies poorly, using the back of one hand to angrily wipe at her tears.

“Clearly.” Robin says sarcastically as he reaches for Lucas. 

Regina reluctantly lets him take their now sleeping son from her arms. Robin places the infant in his crib, gently tucks him and then turns back to Regina and sits on the bed, twisting so he’s facing her, his legs dangling off the side. 

“Now, tell me what’s troubling you.” Robin instructs. 

“It’s nothing, really, I’m being ridiculous.” Regina replies, annoyed at herself for being so emotional.

“Must we do this every time?” Robin asks, his tone full of affection. “We both know I won’t leave you in peace until you tell me so you could save us both some time by just admitting whatever it is.” He smiles. 

Regina huffs out a sigh. 

“I’m being selfish. Again.” She admits.

“Whatever are you talking about?” Robin asks with a frown. 

“This is your home.” She gestures around herself. 

“The palace?” Robin asks, the furrow in his brow deepening. 

“This realm.” Regina clarifies. “You’re happy here.” 

“And you’re not.” Understanding dawns on him. 

“I don’t think I ever can be.” She admits. “I hate it here.”

“And what? You’re worried I won’t want to go back to Storybrooke?” He asks. 

She nods in response. 

“What a ridiculous notion.” He smiles, shaking his head. 

She looks up in surprise. 

“My home is wherever you are.” He tells her earnestly. “I’ve always known how you feel about this place and if there was any doubt, the fact that your version of hell looked like this palace proved it, I would never ask you to remain here. I may have some happy memories in this land my love, but I’m no fool, our children can have much better lives in Storybrooke, happier and healthier than they could be here, we’ll find a way back.” 

“Thank you.” She reaches for his hand, pulling him up to sit with his back against the headboard.

Regina rests her head on his chest, sighing contentedly as his arm goes around her back pulling her close and her arm goes around his front.

She likes to be held he’s noticed, and it’s such a little thing but it’s so important to him that she feels comfortable enough with him to show it.

Regina’s lost in thought again, head resting comfortably against Robin’s chest, listening to the comforting sound of his heart beating in his chest.

“So what do you want now?” Robin breaks the silence after a long while.

“Hmm?” She asks, not sure what he means.

“You told me what you used to dream of for the future, what about now?” He asks.

She sighs against his chest.

“I don’t know.” She admits. “Hope was something I gave up on a long time ago.” She says sadly. “And now I have almost everything I ever wanted, I wouldn’t dare hope for more.”

The ‘almost’ hangs in the air between them, he knows exactly what she means, what’s missing. It’s been playing on his mind too.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said.” He tells her.

“I say a lot of things.” She briefly tilts her head up towards him with a smile that tells him she really doesn’t know what subject he’s about to bring up.

“About giving our daughter a name.” He clarifies and he can hear the change to her breathing immediately. 

“And?” She asks with a shaky voice.

“Caitlin.” He says. 

He can feel a wet patch forming on his shirt where her tears are silently falling. 

“It’s perfect.” Her voice is barely above a whisper. 

“Just like she would have been.” He kisses her hairline.

“What-” Regina starts to speak but cuts herself off. Another moment passes before she starts again. “What happened to her?” She asks. “To Caitlin?” She says, as if trying out the name. 

Robin sighs, he’d wondered if she would ever ask, part of him hoped she wouldn’t. 

“Whale apologised profusely.” Robin begins, and he can feel her tense at the mention of the doctor’s name, he knows there’s a history between them that she hasn’t shared with him. “He swears it was an accident, she was cremated before anyone asked us what our wishes were.” 

Regina is almost sure she can feel her blood boiling, she focuses on her breathing, trying desperately to quell the rage she feels coursing through her. 

“And where is she now?” Regina asks, her voice flat and it’s only because he knows her so well that Robin can tell the struggle going on internally. 

“Whale has her remains at the hospital. There never seemed a good time to talk to you about it.” Robin apologizes, truthfully, he’d been scared of bringing the subject up.

Regina pushes herself up and away from Robin, turning on the bed so she’s facing him. 

“If it’s alright with you, when we get back, I’d like for her to be with Noah.” Regina declares. 

“Of course, it’s only right.” Robin agrees. He frowns as he processes what’s she said though. “In Storybrooke?” He asks.

Regina nods. 

“When they took him from me, Leopold told them to ‘dispose’ of him.” Regina explains.

It’s Robin who’s fighting anger now. 

“The man who took him though, he was kind.” Regina explains sadly. “He came back to me later and he told me that he had given my son a burial as best he could. He risked his life to sneak out into the palace gardens at night and buried my baby next to my favourite apple tree.” Regina tells Robin, tears silently falling down her face as she does so. 

Realization dawns on Robin. He’d always known she had a special affinity for that tree but now it makes more sense. 

“Do you know how I repaid that man for his kindness?” Regina asks bitterly. “I killed him.” 

“Regina.” Robin tries to comfort her but she won’t let him.

“I don’t even know exactly why I did it.” She laughs bitterly.

“You were angry and in pain.” Robin offers.

“It’s no excuse.” Regina says angrily. 

“Perhaps not, but you’re not the person you were.” Robin reaches out to her but she pulls away, standing up and going to the window. 

She looks down at the gardens, the empty space where her apple tree once was. 

Robin follows her, standing beside her and looking down along with her. 

“You know, sometimes I think Zelena had the right idea. The world would have been better off if I’d never existed.” Coming from anyone else it might sound like self-pity, but he recognizes the statement for what it is, self-loathing. 

“Please don’t say such things my love.” Robin pleads, he knows where such feelings can lead with her, down an angry path of self destruction. 

“You could still be happy with Marion.” She says, ignoring him. “Roland would still have his mother.” 

“Roland has a mother who loves him.” Robin corrects her. 

“Only because I killed Marion.” Regina argues. 

He realizes then what she’s doing, trying once again to push him away. 

“What are you talking about? Zelena killed her.” Robin won’t allow her to do this. 

“Before I got the chance.” Regina won’t let him try to comfort her.

“I don’t understand.” Robin is genuinely confused. “You think you killed her?” Robin asks, finally realizing what she’s talking about. 

“What do you mean I think?” Regina snaps.

“I mean, you only think you know what happened.” Robin answers, working hard to stay calm. “I remember Marion being captured by you, but that’s not how she died, at least not the way I remember it.” 

“What?” It’s Regina who’s genuinely confused now. 

“I don’t know how, but I still remember the way things were, how they should have been if Zelena hadn’t interfered.” Robin tells her.

“How is that possible?” Regina asks.

“I have no idea.” Robin shrugs. “The how isn’t important.” He says dismissively. “The point is, the way I remember it, a certain handsome rogue and his band of merry men rescued Marion from the Queen’s terribly inept black knights.” He smiles. 

“How is that possible?” Regina can’t fathom how his memories could be intact. 

“Time travel is hardly my forte.” He shrugs again. “I’m glad that it is possible though, it’s allowed Roland to have some memory of his mother at least.” 

She’d never really thought the timeline of events out before, but he had a point, Roland couldn’t have been more than a year old when she’d captured Marion, certainly not old enough to recognize her to run into her arms the way he had in Granny’s the night Emma had brought her back. 

“You mean, I didn’t kill her?” Regina has to be sure. 

“You didn’t kill her.” Robin confirms.

“So Roland won’t grow up to hate me.” She lets out a sigh of relief. 

“What?” Robin asks, confused. “You’ve been worried about this?”

“I didn’t know, not until Emma and Hook went back in time.” Regina expression is still one of shock. “And then when they came back with her and you chose her, I understood. How could you be with the woman who killed your wife?” 

Her behaviour then made more sense to him now with this new information. She pushed him to be with Marion because she felt guilty. 

“I told you that Marion’s death was my fault.” He says. “And that’s the truth.”

“I thought you’d just meant you felt responsible for her getting captured.” Regina speaks quietly. 

“No.” He reaches out for her again and pulls her into his embrace. “And Roland could never hate you.” He tells her, feeling her relax into him finally. “You’re a wonderful mother to him and Henry and Lucas and any other children we may have.” 

He regrets the last part as soon as it’s out, she stiffens and pulls away again, turning her back to him. 

“I can’t do it again Robin.” She tells him quietly. “I’m not strong enough.”

“It was just a hypothetical, I’m not suggesting we start trying right away.” Robin smiles. 

“You don’t understand, I can’t fight it.” Regina turns to him, her expression deadly serious.

“Fight what? I don’t understand.” Robin frowns in confusion, clearly the subject he’s stumbled onto by accident has been eating away at her.

“Her.” She admits quietly. 

It takes a second for Robin to understand who she means, the evil queen.

“It’s normal to feel angry after what happened my love.” Robin tries to reassure her. 

“No, I…” She hesitates, unsure how to articulate what she means and even more unsure she actually wants to. “I don’t just feel angry, I feel a rage that wants to erupt from me and destroy everything around me.”

“You’re not that person anymore.” Robin tells her again.

“That’s where you’re wrong. I will always be that person.” She tells him. 

“That’s simply not true Regina, you have me and Henry and whole extended family around you now, we’re here for you, we won’t let you go down that path again.” He vows. 

She shakes her head, fear coursing through her veins. She’s afraid if she tells the truth she’ll lose him, but maybe it’s better that way the voice in her head taunts her. 

“You don’t understand.” She tells him again, frustration evident. 

“Then explain it to me.” He says calmly. 

“When we found out about what he had done, I told you that the first thing I wanted to do was kill him.” She says and there’s no need for her to explain who the him she’s referring to is. “But that’s not exactly true I realized in an instant that that would be too easy, he wouldn’t suffer enough and do you know what my first thought was after that?” She looks him in the eye, terrified as she is of his reaction, she has to see it. “Belle.”

“Regina, finding out what we did, that’s a perfectly natural response. The important thing is that you didn’t act on these thoughts.” He tries to reassure her. 

“That’s what I’m trying to tell you Robin, if it were to happened again, I don’t think I’d have the strength to stop myself. I don’t even think I’d want to.” She adds the last part as a whisper, an errant thought she hadn’t even meant to verbalise. 

“Regina-” Robin tries to say something but she cuts him off.

“All I could think about was making him suffer even though I knew it would cost me everything, you, Henry, Roland, even Lucas, I’d lose you all and it almost wasn't enough to stop me.” She tells him.

“But you did stop.” He says.

“If I had to go through that again Robin, if I let myself hope and then had another child taken from me.” She shakes her head. “It would destroy me.” 

“There’s no reason to think-” He’s cut off mid-sentence again.

“There’s every reason to think that. There are plenty of people who have perfectly legitimate grudges against me.” She argues. “And besides that, I doubt I’m even capable of carrying a child after all these curses and spells.” She adds bitterly. “I’ll understand if you want to move on and find someone who can give you children.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Robin says almost angrily. “I love you, not your ability to procreate. I won’t lie, I would love for us to have more children but I’m also perfectly happy if we don’t. All I care about is that you are happy.” He steps towards her again. “Now come here.” He says pulling her into his arms again. “No more of this, I am not ever going anywhere. There’s nothing you can do or say that will ever push me away.”


	47. Chapter 47

_Storybroooke_

Not long after the others have left, Regina and the boys were allowed to move from the waiting room into Granny’s room. 

A few hours later, Regina’s wakes with a start, she doesn’t remember falling asleep in the chair next to Granny’s bed. 

“You’ve been excellent company so far.” Granny quips sourly. 

“Where are they boys?” Regina asks looking around the empty room in a panic. 

“Henry left you a note, they went to the cafeteria.” Granny points to the note at her bedside she’d read when she woke up. 

“How are you feeling?” Regina asks.

“About as good as you look.” Granny quips. “What are you doing here? You need to look after yourself.” 

“I didn’t want you to wake up alone.” Regina tells her.

“So you thought you’d nap with me?” She retorts.

Regina doesn’t have it in her just now to bite back, she sighs heavily. 

“I take it they haven’t found him yet then?” Granny asks upon seeing the defeated look on Regina’s face that came with her sigh. 

“Apparently not.” Regina shrugs, quickly double-checking her cell phone to see if there are any missed calls or messages.

“He’ll turn up, I doubt there’s anything in this world or the next could keep you two separated.” Granny tells her reassuringly.

“I’m supposed to be keeping your spirits up, not the other way around.” Regina angrily swipes at a tear that has escaped without her permission. 

“You were here with me, that’s enough.” Granny says sincerely.

Regina smiles at her awkwardly. There’s something so familiar about this and yet, she can’t remember ever having felt this close to this woman. 

“What’s the damage this time?” Granny asks, indicating around herself to the various drips and monitors.

“I should go get Whale to talk to you.” Regina moves to get up.

“Just tell me.” Granny orders.

“It was your heart.” Regina tells her.

“Yes, I got that from the part where it felt like there was an elephant sitting on my chest.” Granny sarcastically replies. “Is this it then? Am I done for?” She asks in a mock dramatic tone.

“I…” Regina hesitates, not sure if she even wants to know the answer. “He didn’t say, all he said was he’d be able to assess things once you woke up. I should go get him.” Regina moves as quickly as she’s able in her current condition to leave the room.

The nurse on duty at the desk looks up when Regina exits Granny’s room, she smiles kindly at Regina, something she’s not used to. 

“She’s awake.” Regina reports. “Where’s Doctor Whale?” 

“He said he was going to his office, I’ll page him.” The nurse answers.

“It’s ok, I’ll go find him.” Regina’s eager to have something to do, anything to feel useful. 

She heads to Whale’s office, knocking on the door once she reaches it.

“Yes?” He calls from behind the closed door.

Regina opens the door and takes a step into the doorway.

“I thought you would want to know, Granny’s awake.” She tells him.

“Excellent.” Whale claps his hands together then rubs them together.

“Especially considering there’s nowhere else in town to get a decent burger.” 

Regina sighs at his cavalier attitude. 

“Is she…” She hesitates again. “Will she be ok?” She asks.

“So the evil queen has a soft spot for Granny eh? Who knew?” Whale taunts her first but then his demeanour softens as he can see her genuine concern. “The fact that she’s awake is an excellent sign for a good prognosis.” He tells her.

Regina breathes a sigh of relief.

“You look awful, you need to take better care of yourself, especially in your condition.” Whale tells her as he stands up from behind his desk and walks towards her. “I can check you over once I’m done with Granny if you’d like, make sure everything’s cooking properly in there.” He says gesturing toward her rounded abdomen.

“No.” Regina replies quickly, too quickly. “Let’s just focus on Granny for now.” She makes a poor excuse.   
Ignorance is bliss right now as far as she concerned, she can’t deal with any more bad right now. She’s convinced herself in a split second that Whale would have to deliver bad news if he were to check her over, despite the fact she can feel her child moving.

“If you change your mind just come and find me.” He offers as they start walking down the corridor towards Granny’s room.

Regina and Whale walk in an awkward silence, Regina hesitates at the door once they arrive and instead of entering with him she stands awkwardly outside the door to Granny’s room for a minute. She feels like she should be in there, but the logical part of her mind is telling her that that’s ridiculous. She’s not family, she has no business being there.   
Regina, hesitates for a moment until finally her mind wins out, she decides to go and find her boys and make sure they’re not getting themselves into any trouble. 

She takes a few steps in the direction of the cafeteria, but suddenly her mind goes to Robin, all she wants is for him to be here to put his arms around her and tell her everything will be fine. She doesn’t get far before she’s overcome with a wave of tiredness and has to immediately sit in the nearest chair, she corrects herself in her mind, this isn’t tiredness, it’s exhaustion, like every ounce of energy in her body has just been pulled out of her. She’s never felt anything it like it. 

Then it hits her, a searing pain in her right shoulder like a hot iron is being pushed through her. She bites her lip to keep from crying out in pain and her left hand instinctively travels to where the pain is, she’s shocked when it comes away covered in blood. 

“Mom!” Henry is suddenly rushing down the corridor towards her, his concerned face is the last thing she see before she succumbs to the darkness.


	48. Chapter 48

_Enchanted Forest - 1 week later_

“What is it?” Granny asks gruffly. 

Regina’s been loitering at the door to the kitchen for nearly 10 minutes. 

“Nothing, everything’s fine. He’s fine.” Regina answers, annoyed at herself for getting caught again.

Granny narrows eyes, looking at Regina suspiciously.

“Then what?” She demands.

“I just thought I’d see if you needed any help.” It’s a poor excuse and they both know it.

“Spit it out already.” Granny is in no mood for games today. 

Regina sighs dramatically. 

“Fine. These special teas of yours, do you have one that would…prevent pregnancy?” She finally asks.

“Oh, well I guess that makes sense.” Granny nods. 

“What makes sense?” Regina demands.

“Why you’re hardly letting Robin near you.” Granny says matter-of-factly. 

“I…what?” Regina can’t decide if she’s more angry or surprised. 

“I have eyes.” Granny says by way of explanation. “And excellent hearing. You near about jump out your skin if he tries to do anything more than a peck on the cheek.” 

There’s a silence.

“That’s not all though is it?” Granny asks. 

“What are you talking about?” Regina asks angrily.

“I’m talking about birth control not being the reason you flinch when something happens you’re not expecting. What exactly happened to you in the underworld?” Granny’s pushing her now. 

“Nothing worth mentioning.” Regina tries hard to shut her down.

“Oh really? You spend a year in hell and there’s not a thing you feel the need to discuss.” She pushes her sarcastically.

Regina looks at her questioningly, an unspoken challenge as to how she would know she hasn’t spoken about it.

“Oh they’ve both told me you’ve barely said a word about it.” Granny explains, not needing to say who the ‘they’ she’s referring to are.

“They both should know better than to discuss personal matters.” Regina bites back, trying her best ‘Mayor Mills’ voice.

“They’re worried about you, especially now they know the king was there.” Granny won’t let it go now. 

Regina involuntary flinches at the mention of him.

“It’s hardly worth mentioning.” Regina repeats, still trying for her mayoral tone.

“Why don’t I believe you?” Granny snarks.

“I have no idea.” Regina gives a dismissive shrug.

“What did he do to you?” Granny demands. “And I’m not just talking about the underworld.”

“Nothing.” Regina says quickly and defensively. “I was his wife.” It slips out as a whisper. 

“You were a child. I don’t know what your mother was thinking allowing such a thing.” Granny’s spits angrily. 

“Allowing? She orchestrated it.” Regina tells her with a bitter laugh. 

“It should never have been allowed to happen, you were barely older than Snow.” Granny has turned her attention to a ball of dough now, angrily kneading it as she talks. 

“It doesn’t matter.” Regina says dismissively. 

“It does matter. I tell you, I would have a thing or two to say to that so called mother of yours.” Granny continues to pound the dough. 

“She was just doing what she thought was best.” It’s like a reflex for Regina to defend her, even after all these years.

“She really did a number on you didn’t she?” It’s not a question really, there’s no doubt. 

“She…she didn’t have her heart. She’s different with it.” Regina still can’t help but defend her. 

“How could you know that?” Granny stops working with the dough and looks up at Regina. “She was there with you too?”

“She protected me.” Regina tells her, and it’s the truth. 

“Well it was about time she did something right.” Granny says gruffly. “So what happened?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Regina snaps.

“No, but you need to, it’s eating away at you.” Granny tells her.

“What would you know about it?” Regina’s defensive now.

“More than you might think.” Granny admits.

Regina looks at her, studying her now, deciding whether or not she believes her. 

“What happened?” Regina asks.

“We’re not talking about me.” Granny says flatly. 

“So you get to refuse but I don’t?” Regina asks indignantly.

“You catch on quickly, I’ve always like that about you.” Granny quips.

Regina sets her jaw, never one to back away from a fight even if it is just a battle of wills.

“It brought up some less than pleasant memories.” She admits, though that’s all she’s willing to say. “And being here has just made it worse.” 

“Talking about it might actually help you, you know?” Granny tone is a mixture of concern and frustration.

“What’s the point? It’s all ancient history now.” Regina’s exasperated by the conversation. “And all dredging it all up will serve to do is hurt someone who I, despite my best efforts, have grown to care about.” Regina says sadly.

Right on cue, Snow enters the room. 

“You don’t have to protect me anymore Regina, I’m not a child anymore.” Snow pleads with her. 

“How long were you standing there?” Regina asks with a flash of anger.

“Long enough to know Granny’s right, you need to talk about what my father did to you. You’ve buried it long enough.” Snow continues to plead. “Talk to one of us, talk to Robin or even Archie but please Regina, I don’t think you can ever really move on now until you do.” 

“Don’t stand there and lecture me about moving on! I did move on, everything was fine!” Regina’s angry now and she’s not even sure why. 

“No you buried it, there’s a difference.” Granny tells her. 

“I’m not listening to this, neither of you has any idea what you’re talking about.” Regina furious now. 

She’s taken two steps towards the door before Snow’s voice stops her.

“But I do, I lived through those memories with you, remember?” She reminds her softly.

Regina spins on her heel then, flying into a rage.

“You saw a fraction of when I had to endure from him!” She tells Snow angrily through gritted teeth, getting uncomfortable close to her. 

Snow doesn’t shrink back though, she knows she’s not the true target of Regina’s rage and she trusts that Regina has grown too much to take her misplaced anger out on her again. 

“His rancid breath as he flopped about on top of me every night, desperate to produce an heir. No matter how much I begged for him stop. I learned to hard way not to fight him.” It spills out of Regina now, fuelled by anger, the truth about her so called marriage she’s tried so hard to keep buried. “Every time he touched me it made my skin crawl but I was his to do with as he wanted. Do you have any idea what it is to be made to feel like you’re worth nothing?” She asks Snow angrily, tears filling her eyes as years of pent up feelings are finally given voice.

“No.” Snow admits. “I don’t.” 

Regina and Snow stand inches apart, eyes locked, Regina’s breathing quickly as she tries desperately calm herself down. 

“I am truly sorry that my actions caused you to be in that situation.” Snow tells her sincerely. “And for all the times I accused you of being incapable of love. I was too naive to see what was really happening in my own home. The only true monster that ever lived in this palace was my father.” 

Regina can’t trust herself to speak for long moment and she Snow remain perfectly still, still staring into each others eyes. 

Regina is finally the one to break the eye contact, turning to Granny. 

“Are you happy now?” She asks accusingly. 

“It’s a start.” Granny doesn’t react to the anger. “You do know there’s a word for what he did to you?”

Regina is practically vibrating with anger now. 

“I am done with this!” She growls before stalking out of the kitchen. 

She storms through the palace causing more than a few people to literally jump out of her path when they see her coming. 

 

She throws the door to her and Robin’s room open, causing it to bang against the wall and swing shut again. 

“Careful I just got Lucas off for his nap.” Robin smiles, a smile which rapidly disappears when he looks up at Regina. “What’s wrong?” He asks, getting up from where he was sitting at the edge of the bed flicking through a book. 

Regina paces like a trapped animal, full of a rage that’s been pent up for decades. 

“Regina talk to me.” Robin keeps his distance, knowing she needs her space. 

“Why is everyone obsessed with talking about things?” Regina snaps. 

“What’s happened?” He asks calmly. 

“Nothing.” She snaps again.

“Regina.” Robin takes a step towards her with his hands up, palms facing her. “Tell me what’s wrong.” 

“Nothing.” She growls. “Snow and Granny interfering in something they’ve no business in.” 

Regina stands rooted to the spot now, every muscle in her body tensed, her shoulders nearly up to her ears they’re so hunched up, her fists clenched and her breathing rapid as she tries to control herself. 

“Has this got something to do with the King?” Robin asks cautiously. 

Her head swings up to look at him, nostrils failing as her breathing quickens even more, another flash of anger welling up inside her, he’s been dead for decades and still he invades every aspect of her life.

“I’m not a fool Regina, nor is Snow or Granny for that matter. You were hardly a willing bride, that much has been made clear and it doesn’t take much work out what must have gone on.” Robin’s voice is calm and even. “You’ve been different since you came back from the underworld and it’s only gotten worse since the memory curse, I can barely touch you at times without you startling.”

“Is that what this is?” Regina angrily accuses. “You want to have your way with me? Fine, go right ahead, I won’t fight you.” She throws her arms open. 

“Don’t be ludicrous.” Robin replies calmly, trying hard not to rise to her. He knows she wants a fight now. 

“It’s not ludicrous!” Regina accuses angrily. “It’s what my husband used to do.” She spits the word husband out as though it causes a bad taste in her mouth.

Robin can feel his own anger building, not towards her though, towards a long dead King who clearly abused his power in the worst way. He takes a deep breath.

“Perhaps you should talk to Archie?” Robin suggests.

“Why is everyone suddenly so fixated on talking about this?” Regina asks, her anger showing no signs of dying down yet.

“Perhaps because it’s become increasingly clear that you need to deal with what happened.” Robin’s still managing to keep his voice calm.

“Talking won’t change anything!” Regina voice is harsh but she’s not shouting. 

“You’re right, it can’t change what’s happened but it can change how you deal with it.” Robin tells her. 

In that moment it’s like someone has cut the strings holding Regina up, she deflates before his eyes with a long sigh. 

“I don’t want to deal with it, I just want to forget.” She whispers. 

He cautiously approaches her then, making sure he has her permission before he takes her in his arms and holds her tightly to him. 

She rests her chin on his shoulder, closing her eyes and inhaling his scent deeply. They stay like that for a long time until she pulls back, locking eyes with him, she stares as if she’s searching for something and then suddenly she’s kissing him deeply and passionately and wantonly.

It takes a moment for Robin to realize her intentions and once he does he pulls back from the kiss.

“Regina, I don’t think this is a good idea.” He cautions.

She pulls him back into the kiss before she breaks it this time.

“I need this. I need you.” She tells him, grabbing a fistful of his shirt and pulling him towards the bed. 

She sits on the bed when the back of her legs make contact with it, pulling him with her so he’s bent over, maintaining the kiss.

He follows her when she moves backwards on the bed, pulling him onto it with her, he’s supporting his weight on his elbows no, hovering above her. 

She releases her grip on his shirt, reaching for him through his pants. 

He pulls back again. 

“Not like this.” He stands up and walking to the window while running a hand through his hair, trying to regain his composure. 

“Don’t you want me?” She asks quietly, voice full of fear. 

“Of course I do.” He replies with a heavy sigh. 

“Then why?” She asks, pleading. 

“You’re not ready.” He turns to face her. 

She looks at him for a long moment, emotions he can’t identify flickering across her face. 

“Isn’t that for me to decide?” She asks coldly. 

“It is.” He affirms. “But it’s also for me to decide that I don’t want to take advantage of you when you’re upset.” 

“You’re not taking advantage, this is what I want!” She tells him, more than an undercurrent of anger present. 

“I don’t think you know what you want.” Robin admits.

“Who are you to tell me my own mind?” She rages. “How dare you presume to tell me what I do and do not want.” It’s the Queen’s voice she’s using now. 

Robin holds his hands up in mock surrender. 

“I’m going to leave, find me when you’ve calmed down and we’ll talk.” He says picking Lucas up and backing towards the door. 

She stands glaring after him long after the door has closed behind him. Before she realizes what she’s doing she’s picked up the first thing that comes to hand and thrown it at the door Robin’s just walked through. She’s suddenly filled with rage, and much to her frustration it leads to her vision blurring with tears. 

She ends up in a crumpled heap on the floor, decades of pent up emotions suddenly coming to the surface, she’s sobbing so hard she can barely breathe. 

She has no idea how long has passed when she suddenly feels arms around her.

Her first instinct is to fight and she does, pushing them away.

“Shhh, it’s me, it’s Robin, you’re safe.” He puts his arms around her again, she doesn’t fight this time, instead she clings to him like he’s a lifeline. 

“I’m sorry.” She sobs. “I’m so sorry.” 

“You have nothing to apologise for my love.” He tells her earnestly. 

In his arms, she starts to calm down, her sobs dying down to whimpers and sniffs. 

He’s kneeling on the floor and she’s slumped against him now. 

“We need to get you off this cold floor, I’m going to lift you up, ok?” He asks for permission and doesn’t lift her until he sees her nod her head. 

He carries her to the bed and places her gently on it, when he moves to straighten up and take a step away she grabs his arm with a vice-like grip. 

“Please don’t go.” She whispers desperately. 

“Of course.” He sits on the bed, his back leaning against the headboard, his legs stretched out on the bed. Regina rests her head on his chest and he puts an arm around her. 

They lay like that in silence for a long while until Regina falls asleep. He feels her body relax as she succumbs to sleep and while this isn’t the most comfortable position for him, he’ll be damned if he’s moving. He eventually finds himself dropping off to sleep and doesn’t fight it, content to have her in his arms. 

 

He’s jolted from sleep by Regina sitting bolt upright suddenly, her breathing is fast and it’s obvious she’s just woken from a nightmare.

She stands up from the bed before he can say anything, storming across the room until she’s standing looking out of the balcony window, her back to him. 

He approaches cautiously, loudly, trying his best not to startle her but she still jumps when he softly says her name. 

“It’s me, you’re safe.” He tells her, putting his arms around her.

She leans back into him.

“Talk to me.” He pleads.

“I hate that he can still do this to me.” Her voice is full of anger and disgust. “I hate that I was so weak.” 

“You weren’t weak Regina. There’s a difference between being powerless to stop something and being weak. You were strong to enough to survive.” Robin tries to reassure her. 

“I used to cry, at first.” She tells him as she stares off into the distance, there’s a dam that’s broken now and she needs to say it out loud. “Every time he would come to my chambers. He didn’t like that though, he used to grab my face and tell me to stop. I tried to fight for a while after that. He was too big though, all it did was make him angry. He gave me a black eye the first time.” 

Robin’s hand is clenched in a tight fist as he listens, anger welling inside him. 

“He learned after that, nowhere that couldn’t be hidden. It didn’t take long before I stopped fighting though, I would just go away in my mind, somewhere happy, where I could be free, that was all I wanted at first.” She tells him. “When Daniel was taken from me, I felt empty inside, like I’d been hollowed out and then over time, that space was filled with rage. When I lost Noah, whatever was left of me got taken out and all that was left was the anger.”

“You had every right to be angry, what he did to you was despicable.” Robin tells her, fighting to keep his own emotions in check. 

“It was his right, you know that as well as I do, in this land, I was his wife, he could do what he wanted.” Regina tone is flat.

“Whether there was a law against it or not, it was wrong.” Robin can’t help his anger seeping through. 

“I should have been stronger, I should have fought harder.” Regina’s voice is still monotone. “Instead, I let myself become a monster, far, far worse than he ever was.” 

“That’s not true.” Robin pulls her closer.

“I know for a fact all the people I sent to the underworld would beg to differ.” She argues. 

“I won’t deny you did terrible things.” He tells her. “But it was a reaction to things you suffered through. You were too young to have such horrific things happen to you. You were a victim too.” 

“Victim is just another word for weak.” She counters.

“Stop it.” He says harshly. “I won’t let you do this. The things you’ve done, terrible as they are Regina, they’re in the past. You have proven time and again that you are not the same person you were. I truly believe that now you’re the person you were always meant to be. You’re the woman that I love and the mother of my children and there is nothing that will ever change that. We’re soulmates, I feel like there’s a part of me missing when I’m not with you and I will spend every day of the rest of my life fighting to make you see how special you are.”


	49. Chapter 49

_Storybrooke_

“Mom?” 

Regina gradually fights her way from the haziness of unconsciousness to find her son sitting at her bedside, his face filled with worry.

She swallows, finding her mouth dry, and it takes a few minutes for her to be able to form words.

“What happened?” She asks groggily, trying to sit up in the bed she’s woken to find herself in.

“We were kinda hoping you could tell us.” Emma appears in her line of vision.

Regina reaches for her shoulder, finding only a dull ache there now. 

“I was…bleeding.” She frowns, confused, she’d been expecting to find a bandage there.

“There was no blood mom.” Henry tells her, frowning in concern.

“What?” Regina asks, growing more and more baffled by the second. “I saw it. I got this pain in my shoulder like someone was shoving a hot poker through it and when I put my hand to it, it was covered in blood.”

“Your body certainly reacted as if it was experiencing a major haemorrhage.” Whale speaks now. “But there’s no sign of any trauma.” 

“I don’t understand.” Regina tries to sit up. 

“Slow down.” Whale puts a hand on her shoulder to gently push her back onto the bed. “Your baby’s fine by the way, in case you were wondering.” He adds sarcastically. 

She glares at him. She hadn’t needed to ask, she could feel the child moving. 

She shrugs his hand off and sits up, pulling off monitor leads angrily and then pulling her IV out. 

“Where are my clothes?” She asks, annoyed to find herself in a hospital gown. 

“Mom!” Henry’s in front of her now, steadying her as she stands. “Sit down!” He tells her. 

“I’m fine Henry.” She lies as dizziness clouds her vision. “I have to find Robin.” 

“No, you have to stay here and be safe until we figure out what’s going on.” Henry tells her authoritatively. 

She tries to pull away from him but he doesn’t let her. 

“Mom!” He says loudly to get her attention. “It’s not just you you have to worry about right now, you’ve got my little brother or sister to think about too, ok?” 

Regina stares at her son, who once again seems much older than his years. As if trying to reinforce his point, the baby kicks hard enough to make her gasp and her hand instinctively moves to her belly. 

“Mom?” 

“Regina?” 

Henry and Emma speak at the same, full of concern. 

“I’m fine, it was just a big kick.” Regina reassures them. 

“Little soccer player in there huh?” Emma smiles. 

“Perhaps.” Regina tries her best to return the smile but it’s false and they all know it. 

“As charming as this all is, you need to get back into bed Ms Mills, we may not know what happened but your body seems to think it’s been through a major trauma and you need to rest in order to recover from that.” Whale tells them all. 

Regina reluctantly relents, she can’t deny she feels exhausted. 

“We’ll let you rest.” Emma has her hands on Henry’s shoulders, leading him out of the room. 

“Wait!” Regina calls out after them. “How’s Granny?” She asks once they’ve turned around. 

“She’s doing ok.” Emma tells her, hesitating about whether to continue or not. “Actually, she just about managed to fight her way out of bed the minute she heard you’d collapsed but we convinced her to stay put.” 

Regina smiles, sounds about right. Except it didn’t, not at all, but it felt right. 

“I should go see her.” Regina moves to get up again. 

“Stop.” Whale orders. “How about I have you two moved into the same room? I have a feeling that’ll make everyone’s lives easier.” 

Regina slumps back into bed. 

“Fine.” She agrees. “Has Belle woken up yet?” She asks hopefully.

Emma looks down, before answering and that in itself tells Regina all she needs to know.

“She doesn’t even remember being back in the enchanted forest at all.” Emma tells her. 

Regina works her bottom lip between her teeth trying desperately not to cry but it’s beginning to feel hopeless to her. They have no idea where Robin is. 

 

 

“You know, you’re going to have to sleep eventually, you might as well stop fighting it.” Granny’s voice cuts through the darkness of her and Regina’s shared hospital room. 

Regina sighs loudly. It’s 2:30 am and she’s been tossing and turning for hours. 

“I’m not fighting anything.” Regina replies, annoyance clear in her tone. “In case you haven’t noticed I’ve got a lot on my mind.” 

“Of course, yes, trying to ignore the fact you’re heavily pregnant must be taking up a lot of your energy.” Granny retorts sarcastically. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Regina answers her accusation defensively. 

“Bullshit.” Granny states. “You know exactly what I’m talking about.” 

Silence is the only response but Granny swears she can hear Regina breathing angrily. 

“You really think if you pretend it’s not happening it would hurt less if something goes wrong?” Granny asks, cutting straight through to the real issue.

Regina remains silent but Granny hears the hitch in her breathing.

“You already care. It’s quite obvious to anyone who bothers to look you already love that child so pretending it doesn’t exist won’t make the damnedest bit of difference in the extremely unlikely event something were to happen.” Granny tells her.

Regina doesn’t answer, putting all her energy into trying to keep her breathing steady as tears silently stream down her face.

“You have to have hope.” Granny tells her.

“Hope just leads to disappointment.” Regina voice is barely above a whisper.

“Not always. Not this time.” Granny says authoritatively. “I can feel it.”

“I don’t know if I can do this without him.” Regina admits, voice still quiet.

“Of course you can.” Granny scoffs. “You’re about the strongest person I’ve ever met. Besides, he’ll turn up.” 

“I wish I could believe that.” Regina angrily wipes at the tears that are still falling.

A silence falls over the pair, each lost in their own thoughts for a moment until suddenly Regina feels the same overwhelming exhaustion as before. 

“It’s happening again.” She declares, alarmed. 

“What? What is?” Granny asks, her tone equally as alarmed. 

Suddenly there’s a searing pain through Regina’s right wrist, like the bone is being crushed. She gasps out in pain and before she can do much more than that the same pain shoots through her left wrist. 

She holds her shaking hands out in front of her, looking at them, trying desperately to understand what’s happening. Then before her eyes, her arms are cut open, long, straight deliberate cuts appear one arm, then other, over and over until finally she finally blacks out. 

 

 

Regina finds herself waking up, unsure of how long has passed, her eyes are heavy though and her hearing returns before she can bring herself to open her eyes. She hears the steady beeping of a heart monitor and hushed whisperings.

She forces herself to open her eyes. 

“What happened?” She finds herself asking again. 

“We’re not sure.” It’s Emma who answers, coming to stand at the side of Regina’s bed, she’s whispering.

Regina manages to lift her head enough to see Henry and Roland sleeping on a couch that has obviously been brought into the room since she passed out. 

“How long was I out?” She asks. 

“18 hours.” Snow answers, approaching from the side of the room where Granny is lying, unmoving, in bed. 

“What?” Regina asks, seeing Snow’s face. 

Snow tries and fails to mask her expression of worry. 

“Tell me.” Regina demands, her hand going to her belly in panic until she gets a reassuring kick.

“When whatever was happening to you was happening, she tried to help.” Snow begins explaining. “She saw blood this time too.” 

Regina looks between Emma and Snow, impatiently waiting for one of them to tell her what was going on.

“Granny had another heart attack.” Emma finally comes out with it. “Whale says it doesn’t look good.” 

Regina looks over to where the other woman appears to be sleeping peacefully.

“I don’t understand. Why isn’t she on a ventilator in the ICU then? Why aren’t they helping her?” Regina asks, a feeling of panic mixed with guilt washing over her. 

“Apparently she left instructions that she didn’t want any of that.” Snow explains.

“Screw that!” Regina exclaims. “They have to help her!” She makes a move to sit up and get out of bed and make someone do just exactly that. 

“Regina stop!” Snow has her hands on Regina’s shoulders. “You have to take care of yourself right now. We have no idea what’s happening to you.” 

“I’m fine.” Regina shrugs her off. “I’m not the one we need to worry about.” 

“Regina, you need to get some rest. Hook and the dwarves are still out searching for Robin and Granny’s tough, she may well surprise us all and pull through this.” Emma tries to reassure her. 

Regina lays back on the bed with a sigh, running a hand through her hair. 

“Fine.” She sighs. “Is Lucas with David?” She asks. 

Snow nods in response. 

“Can you take Henry and Roland home please? They need to get some proper sleep.” Regina asks Emma. 

“They’ll want to see you.” Emma counters. 

“I know, but just, not tonight. Have them wake up in their own beds, please?” Regina asks. 

“Ok.” Emma aquiesces reluctantly. 

“I’ll stay.” Snow offers. 

“No, you should go home and get some sleep too.” Regina replies. 

“I don’t mind.” Snow smiles. 

“I’d just really like to be alone for a while.” Regina admits. 

“If that’s what you want.” There’s a hint of skepticism to her tone but she doesn’t push it.

“It is. Thank you.” Regina offers her a small smile. 

She nods at Emma and then she, Henry, Roland and Snow are gone from the room in a swirl of magic. 

Regina waits a moment, making sure they’re definitely gone, then she pulls out yet another IV and stands up on shaky legs. She’s dizzy for a moment but it passes as she makes her way to Granny’s bedside. 

“No one else is going to die to because of me.” Regina declares, holding her hands out over Granny’s body. “Least of all you.” She focuses all of her magic on healing Granny. 

It’s a fight, she’s never been good at healing, and she’s so tired already, she can feel this spell draining whatever energy she has left. 

Her hands begin to shake and she’s not sure how much longer she can stay on her feet, but then suddenly, it’s done. 

Granny takes a sudden deep breath and sits up in the bed. 

She looks at Regina, alarmed as she realizes what’s just happened. 

“What did you do?” She asks, and it’s the last thing Regina hears before she falls to the floor and succumbs to the darkness again.


	50. Chapter 50

_Enchanted Forest_

Regina wakes the next morning when she hears a knocking on the door. She stays still, feigning sleep, hoping whoever it is will leave.

She hears Robin approach and then open the door.

“I wanted to make sure Regina was ok.” She hears Snow’s voice.

“She’s still sleeping.” He replies, though she suspects he knows she’s not.

“I just, I didn’t mean to upset her.” Snow continues, stepping passed Robin and into the room. 

Regina sighs and sits up, straightening her hair out as she does so. 

“And what exactly did you think would happen?” Regina asks with another resigned sigh.

“I don’t know.” Snow admits. “It’s been a lot of information to process, I guess I was being selfish. I wanted to talk about it.” 

“I’ll leave you two alone.” Robin makes a hasty exit from the room. He knows better than to get in the middle of these two. 

As she’s speaking it occurs to Regina that she’s slept longer than she has in weeks, she’s about to ask where Lucas is when he appears next to her in the bed in a puff of blue smoke. 

“Somebody wants their breakfast huh?” She laughs as she picks him up and settles him to feed. 

Snow looks at her former step-mother in awe for a moment, Regina hadn’t exactly publicised this development in how they were meeting Lucas’ nutritional needs.

“I’ll uh, give you some privacy.” Snow says awkwardly and begins to walk toward to the door.

“You were right.” Regina voice stops Snow in her tracks. “Much as it pains me to say it.” 

There’s a pause as Snow turns back to face her.

“About?” Snow asks.

“It did help for me to talk to Robin about…what happened.” Regina admits, she still can’t bring herself to put it into words though. “I feel…lighter somehow.” She admits. “And I’m sorry that I lost with temper with you. Again.”

She can tell Snow still has something on her mind.

“Have a seat.” Regina gestures to the foot of the bed. “Ask your questions.” 

Snow sits down at the end of the bed, feeling awkward.

“I don’t know that I have specific questions as such.” She admits.

“Then what?” Regina asks.

“I don’t know.” Snow admits. “I just wish that we could be closer again, like when I was young.” 

“You’re sitting on my bed while I breastfeed, I’d say we’re pretty close.” Regina tells her sarcastically. 

Snow smiles.

“I know, but sometimes I wonder if too much has happened, that we’ll never get back to what we had.”

“What we had wasn’t real. Not for very long anyway.” Regina admits. “I’m sorry if that upsets you.” 

“No, I mean, I guess I knew that.” Snow admits.

“I think what we have now is better.” Regina tells her honestly. 

Snow looks surprised.

“There’s no pretence anymore. You know pretty much everything and you still chose to come here.” Regina realizes this is probably the most open and honest conversation the two of them have ever had.

“I guess you’re right.” Snow realizes the same thing. “I just wonder sometimes how we’re meant to define our relationship?”

“That’s a little more complicated.” Regina admits with a laugh. “I think maybe we should just ignore it all, the step-mother, the fact you’re my sons grandmother, and just be friends?” 

“Ok.” Snow smiles. “But, I would like it if Neal could call you Grandma.” She laughs.

Regina looks a mix of affronted and taken-a-back at the suggestion.

“Fair’s fair, I’m grandmother to a teenager.” Snow’s still laughing.

“Fine.” Regina relents.

Snow’s expression turns serious suddenly and she takes Regina’s free hand in her own. 

“I am truly sorry for my part in what happened to you.” Snow says sincerely.

“And I’m sorry for what I did to you.” Regina replies.

“We leave it here, agreed?” Snow suggests.

“Agreed.” Regina says with a nod.

“Then I’ll leave you to it.” Snow leaves Regina alone with her son and her thoughts.

 

 

“I think you know I how I feel about apologies so I’ll keep this brief.” Regina stands in the doorway to the kitchens later that day. “I’m sorry that I lost my temper yesterday.” 

“I had it coming for pushing you.” Granny shrugs as she focuses on kneading dough. 

“Still.” Regina continues. “I shouldn’t have done it, and I’m sorry.” She stands awkwardly for a beat before turning to leave. 

“I could use a hand down here.” Granny calls after her. “If it’s not below you your majesty.”

“What can I do?” Regina asks, turning and stepping into the kitchen.

“Well, I keep hearing about how your lasagne is better than mine, how about your bread?” Granny quips, slapping a lump of dough down on the work top in front of Regina.

“I’ve never made bread before.” Regina admits, somewhat daunted at the prospect.

“Well there’s a first time for everything.” Granny tells her. “Just watch what I do.” 

A silence falls over the two as Regina concentrates on watching Granny’s actions.

“So did you and Robin talk then?” Granny eventually asks. 

“We did.” Regina replies. 

“And?” Granny pushes her again. 

“And it helped.” Regina admits. “Some.” 

Another silence falls over them as they work, but it’s a comfortable one.

 

 

_2 weeks later_

Winter is coming and preparations are underway to stockpile food and supplies to see them through it. With no way home in sight, people are resigning themselves to being stuck here, although it’s clear no one is very happy about it.

Regina has taken to spending her days in the kitchen with Granny and Lucas. The friendship between the Queen and the old wolf has raised more than a few eyebrows but there’s no denying the two have grown close. 

Snow joins them on occasion, but she and David have been left with the day to day running of the kingdom and that takes up most of her time. 

She and Regina are closer than ever, but circumstances are preventing them from spending much time together.

Regina is in bed by the time Robin returns from a hunting trip, the sun having long since set. 

He quietly makes his way into their bedchambers, careful not to wake her. She’s still often plagued by nightmares so he’ll be damned if he wakes her from a peaceful slumber. 

He’s stripped down to just his pants and is quietly washing up before climbing into bed when it starts. 

He sighs, he’d hoped maybe tonight she would be able to sleep peacefully all night. 

Her breathing quickens and she whimpers quietly. 

These ones are the worst he realizes with another sigh. 

“Regina.” He tries to shake her awake. 

She pushes his hands away, waking up with a start and getting as far away from him as possible on the bed before she recognises where she is, who he is. 

She runs both hands through her hair, her knees drawn up to her chest. 

“Sorry.” She takes a deep, shuddering breath.

“I do wish you’d stop apologising.” He gives her a lop-sided smile.

“I just wish you didn’t have to keep dealing with me like this.” She lets out a resigned sigh.

“And I wish you’d stop thinking of yourself as a burden.” Robin tells her sadly. 

He reaches out to put a hand on her shoulder, quickly pulling it back when she can’t help but flinch. 

“No.” She says. 

“I’m sorry.” He apologises, thinking that she’s telling him to stop.

“No, I want you to touch me Robin.” She’s determined. 

“Regina…” He says her name with a note of caution in his voice. 

“I need this.” She tells him. “And it’s not because I’m upset or whatever else you’re thinking.” 

He hesitates.

“Please.” She pleads. “I need this. I need you.” She pulls him closer and kissing him passionately. 

He pulls back for a moment, looking over to the crib where Lucas would normally be sleeping.

“Granny took him for the night.” She’s tells him, breathless from the kiss, before pulling him back in for another kiss and then wrapping her legs around his torso. 

He breaks the kiss again and she groans. 

“Are you sure this is what you want?” He asks, searching her eyes for something.

She holds his eye contact unwaveringly. 

“I’ve never been more sure of anything.” She assures him and pulls him back down to her.


	51. Chapter 51

_Storybrooke_

When Regina comes to this time it’s with a start.

“Well it’s about damn time.” 

It takes a moment for her to process the voice is Granny’s. 

“What…?” Regina trails off, confused to find Granny sitting at her bedside, looking the picture of health.

“Oh no, that’s my question. What on earth were you thinking young lady? You could have died pulling a stunt like that! You very nearly did in fact.” Granny chastises her but it’s clear the admonishment is based in concern. 

It comes back to Regina then, her determination the she wasn’t going to let the other woman die no matter what it took. 

“It’s hard to find a good babysitter in this town.” Regina shrugs, trying to play down what she’s done. 

“I swear girl, if you’d killed yourself and that baby trying to save me…” Granny trails off, she doesn’t even want to think about it.

Regina’s hand flies to her stomach protectively.

“The baby’s fine.” Granny reassures her. “Though I wish you’d been more worried about that before!” She admonishes her again. 

“I wasn’t thinking.” Regina says groggily. “I just…acted.” 

“Don’t ever do that to me again. I near about got the fright of my life when I woke up to see you collapsing!” Granny’s trying to be jovial when she’s saying it, but she can’t hide the true fear she felt for Regina. 

Regina looks around the room.

“How long was I out for this time?” She asks. 

“3 days.” Granny tells her.

Regina tries to sit up.

“I swear to god if I have to go and get my crossbow to make you stay in that bed I will do it.” Granny threatens. “Not to mention the nurses have threatened some not very pleasant sounding things if you rip another IV out!”

Regina reluctantly relents, settling back against the pillows.

“I take it there’s still no sign of Robin.” Her tone is dejected, knowing full well he’d be here with her if he’d been found. 

“No.” Granny admits.

Regina can feel her eyes welling up. 3 whole days have passed and there’s still no sign of him. 

“He’s out there, I know it.” Granny lays a hand over Regina’s.

It’s odd and familiar at the same time, for both of them. 

“Get some rest, you’re going to need your strength.” Granny pats her hand. 

Regina nods, and that alone has Granny worried, this is the most stubborn girl she’s ever met and she’s giving in without a fight. 

Before Granny can say anything else though, Regina’s eyes are suddenly rolling back in her head and she’s crying out in pain. 

Granny shouts for help, holding Regina’s hand in a vice-grip, trying to reassure her. 

Just as suddenly as it started, it’s over, Regina’s eyes refocus on Granny. 

“Call Emma, I know where Robin is.” She says.


	52. Chapter 52

_Enchanted Forest - 1 week later_

“Morning.” Robin greets Granny as he enters the kitchen with Lucas in his arms.

“Morning.” She meets his wary smile with a frown, she was expecting Regina.

“Regina’s, uh, not feeling to well this morning.” Robin tells her, hesitating for a moment. “I was hoping you could mind Lucas for a few hours. I have to lead another hunting party.” He explains.

Granny eyes him suspiciously.

“What’s really going on?” She asks.

“Nothing.” He protests quickly. 

She narrows her eyes at him.

“It’s just…” He hesitates, a part of him wants to talk about it but he knows how fiercely private Regina is. “It’s a difficult day for her.” He admits without admitting anything. “For both of us actually.” He adds wistfully.

Granny looks at him for a long moment, processing what he’s said and what he hasn’t.

“This was her due date wasn’t it?” It’s phrased as a question but she can do basic math. 

Robin holds Lucas a little tighter and nods sadly. 

“I’d have thought she’d want him with her.” Granny nods her head towards Lucas.

“So would I.” He admits. “Truthfully I’ve no idea what she wants. She wouldn’t even get out of bed this morning.” He sighs. “She’s been getting more and more withdrawn the last few days.” He admits. “I thought we were finally getting to a good place, she finally opened up to me about her past, thanks to you.” 

“I don’t need to tell you it’s a difficult thing to lose a child.” Granny sympathises. “Everyone deals with it differently.” 

“I know.” Robin agrees. “I suppose I just hoped that we were passed her shutting me out like this.” He sighs sadly. “We talked about her you know, finally. We even gave her a name, Caitlin.” He tells her with a sad smile. 

Granny just listens, realizing he needs to talk.

“I saw her get more withdrawn over the last few days but I didn’t even realize why until yesterday, what kind of a father does that make me?” Robin asks.

“One who’s been moved to a realm where the date isn’t really used in day to day life and who’s busy trying to deal with the latest crisis in his life.” Granny tells him. “It doesn’t make you a bad parent that you didn’t realize this was coming up.”

Robin puts Lucas in his cot in the kitchen while she’s talking then turns back to face her. 

“It feels like a lifetime ago in some ways.” Robin admits. “So much has happened since we lost her.”

“I think that’s understating it.” Granny agrees.

“And yet sometimes when I close my eyes, all I can see is Regina lying in a pool of blood in her office and it feels like it was only yesterday I thought I was going to lose them both.” He admits, eyes filling with unshed tears. 

“You won’t lose her.” Granny lays a hand on his arm and gives it a comforting squeeze before guiding him to sit at one of the benches along the wall of the kitchen. “Today is a horrible reminder of what should have been. For both of you.” 

“I thought she was upset because of me.” He admits quietly. 

“Why?” Granny asks, a hint of accusation in her tone. “What did you do?” 

He hesitates again for a moment, but he’s revealed this much, he’s may as well tell her everything. 

“We were…intimate again.” He pauses mid-sentence searching for the right word. “I was afraid that she wasn’t as ready as she said.” 

“You know what the King did isn’t the only reason…” Granny tells him. 

“What do you mean?” He asks.

“I mean she’s terrified of getting pregnant again.” She explains. “She asked me for a tea to help prevent it, that’s what started that whole thing a few weeks back actually.” 

“I see.” Robin processes this information. “I mean, she’s about said as much but I suppose I never really connected it.” 

“And how do you feel about it?” Granny asks.

“I’m not sure.” He admits. “I just want her to be happy.” 

“You can’t achieve that by making yourself unhappy.” She replies.

“That’s not what I’m doing.” Robin says defensively. “It’s just…she’s been through so much, I think her needs should come before mine.” 

“You’ve been through something awful too.” Granny reminds him.

“It’s different.” He argues.

She narrows her eyes at him and he can practically hear the wheels turning in her mind.

“Why do you feel guilty?” She asks, hitting the nail on the head.

“I made her hope.” He says sadly.

Granny frowns, not following. 

“When we found out she was pregnant, I was so excited and I couldn’t understand why she wasn’t. I thought it was just because of the curse she’d used to make herself barren. I didn’t know what had happened before, about Noah.” He admits sadly. 

“Noah is the baby the Dark One took from her?” Granny confirms, she’s heard bits of the story and pieced it together from what she’d seen. 

Robin nods.

“You couldn’t have possibly known what Zelena would do. Nobody could.” Granny tries to comfort him. 

“But I dismissed her fears out of hand. I thought she was being paranoid.” Robin argues.

“Well you didn’t exactly have all the information. She didn’t even have all the information. You can’t feel guilty about being excited and trying to share that with her. You did nothing wrong.” Granny says.

“Perhaps.” He agrees reluctantly. “But I am being selfish in wanting to try again.” 

“Maybe, maybe not.” Granny tells him. “I think it’s something you two need to talk about.” She says. “But not for a while. Go on your hunt, clear your head, I’ll deal with today.” 

 

 

When Regina’s not appeared after three hours, Granny decides to confront the situation, so she lifts Lucas from his crib, leaves him with a slightly bewildered Snow and goes to Regina and Robin’s chambers.

When there’s no answer to her knock she enters anyway to find the room in darkness, the curtains drawn and it’s sole occupant in bed.

Granny draws the curtains back enough to let some light in and turns her attention towards the bed. 

Regina’s lying curled up on her side, facing Granny, eyes red and puffy from hours of crying. 

“Oh girl.” Granny feels her own heart break a little at the sight. “What have you done?” She asks with a sad sigh. 

She could hear it as soon as she entered the room, the thump-thump of a beating heart. One that wasn’t in a chest.

She moves towards where the sound is coming from and finds a box in one of the drawers of Regina’s dressing table. Once she’s confirmed it’s contents she carries it over to the bed, she pulls a chair over with her and sits facing Regina. 

Regina just stares blankly passed Granny. 

Granny gently lifts the heart out of the box, marvelling at it for a moment, she’s never held one before, before holding it out towards Regina.

“You appear to have misplaced this.” Granny says. 

It takes a moment for Regina to react but it doesn’t go unnoticed by Granny how her eyes momentarily widen in fear. Regina shakes her head in response.

“It’s too much.” Regina whispers.

“I know.” Granny agrees. “It is. But you can’t have the good without the bad. Your boys need you, all of you, including a beating heart in your chest.” 

“I don’t think I can do it.” Regina admits, silent tears falling again. 

“Yes you can. You mourn and you move on with your life. It doesn’t mean you forget and it doesn’t mean you won’t always feel there’s something missing but you have your boys who are here now, they need you.” 

Regina looks at the heart in Granny’s hand as if it’s a grenade about to explode, and in a way it is. The grief she was feeling was overwhelming her, she’d had to make it stop. 

“Look at me.” Granny orders. 

Regina complies, looking the older woman in the eye. 

“You’re going to put this back where it belongs.” She tells her. “Then you’re going to have a good long cry, if you want to talk, I’ll listen, and then we’re going to go down to the kitchen just like it’s any other day.” 

Regina sits up, swinging her legs off the side of the bed.

When she doesn’t make any further move after that, Granny stands and then sits on the bed beside her. 

“You are not your mother Regina, you need this.” Granny puts the heart in Regina’s hand. 

She lifts Regina’s hand so the heart is resting against the skin of her chest, Regina’s hand on top.

Regina hesitates for another moment before she plunges her heart back where it belongs. She takes a deep breath as she feels the crushing weight of the grief come down upon her again. 

A sob escapes her throat before she can stop it.

Granny puts an arm around her then, pulling Regina towards her until eventually they’re arranged so that Regina’s lying on her side again with her head resting in Granny’s lap, it’s a sign of how far gone Regina is that she accepts this move with no resistance.

“Let it out.” Granny gently strokes Regina’s head, running her fingers through her hair. “Let it all out.” 

Hours pass like that, Granny trying her best to comfort Regina and Regina clinging onto her like a lifeline. 

“I don’t know how to do this.” Regina eventually admits. 

“You do it the same way everyone does it, one day at a time.” Granny tells her. “This is a big step though, you’re finally letting yourself grieve.” 

Regina sits up awkwardly, suddenly acutely aware of just how vulnerable she’d let herself be. 

“No one will hear a word from me.” Granny vows. “Not even Robin if that’s what you want.” 

“Thank you.” Regina tries to wipe at her eyes. 

“You two do need to talk though.” Granny tells her. 

“I know.” Regina agrees. 

“And once your on a more even keel we need to discuss how you managed to take your heart when you’re not able to use magic.” Granny tells her.

Regina looks at her hands then, suddenly realizing Granny was right. She hadn’t even thought about it, she’d just acted. 

She focuses on her hand, staring at it intently trying to form a fireball. Hell she’d be happy with even a spark, but nothing. She keeps trying until her hand is shaking with the exertion she’s putting into it. 

“Enough.” Granny lays her hand on Regina’s. “We’ll figure it out.” Granny stands up. “I imagine you’ve got a very hungry boy waiting on you.” 

Regina’s face crumples again. 

“I’m a terrible mother.” She whispers.

“No.” Granny tells her forcefully. “You’re a grieving mother. Stay here, I’ll bring the boys to you.” 

“What are you going to tell them?” Regina asks hesitantly. 

“The truth.” Granny replies matter-of-factly before walking out of the room. 

 

 

Granny pulls Henry and Roland from their classes in the makeshift school that had been set up by the former residents of Storybrooke under Snow’s supervision. 

“Is my mom ok?” Henry asks worriedly as they follow Granny through the corridors towards Snow’s council room where she’d left Lucas earlier. All Granny had said when she pulled them out of class was that their mother needed them. 

Granny stops and turns round to face the two boys. 

“Your mom is ok.” She tells them. “She’s just a little sad right now and she needs her boys around her.” 

“Why is mama sad?” Roland asks. 

“Well, today should have been your little sister’s birthday.” Granny answers honestly. “And your mama is missing her a lot today.” 

Understanding dawns on Henry. 

“That means we give mom lots of cuddles today, ok buddy?” He tells Roland.

Granny smiles at him. Smart boy. 

They collect Lucas from Snow and head back to Regina’s room, where she’s sitting up on the bed looking far more collected than she had when Granny left. 

“Mama!” Roland shouts, running towards her and leaping onto the bed, snuggling into her side. 

Regina pulls the boy close to her, kissing the top of his head. 

“Do you need anything mom?” Henry asks.

“Just you baby.” Regina smiles. 

Henry sits on the side of the bed and holds his mom’s hand. 

Granny gives Lucas to Regina and silently leaves the room after Regina mouths a silent thank you. 

Regina spends the rest of the day with her 3 boys and Granny makes sure they aren’t interrupted. 

 

 

Granny’s back in the kitchen, clearing up after the evening meal. It’s dark out, it’s started to rain heavily and there’s the odd crack of thunder. 

“Thank you.” Regina says as she enters the kitchen. 

“No need.” Granny shrugs.

“We both know that’s not true.” Regina says solemnly. 

“Are the boys hungry?” Granny asks, changing the subject.

“No, we had dinner, it was delicious by the way.” Regina smiles.

“Just the usual.” Granny shrugs again. 

Regina hesitates, clearly wanting to say more, but before she can Snow and David burst into the kitchen.

“There you are!” Snow addresses Regina. “We’ve been looking all over for you.”

“What’s wrong?” Regina asks, they don’t look like they come with good news. 

“There’s been an accident with the hunting party.” David tells her.

“Where’s Robin?” She asks, a sense of dread filling her.

“He’s missing.”


	53. Chapter 53

_Enchanted Forest_

“What does that mean? What happened?” Regina asks, panic in her voice.

“The rest of the party made it back, barely.” David tells her.

“So they just left him out there?” Regina’s outburst comes out as anger but they all know her well enough to know it’s a sign of how worried she is.

“They said they were hunting by the river after the rain started.” Snow recounts what she’s been told. “There was a landslide and Robin was swept into the river. They tried to follow but the river’s running so fast they lost sight of him.” 

“I don’t understand why they’re not still out there looking for him!” Regina barks.

“Two of the other five were hurt pretty badly by a falling tree. They had to make a choice Regina, so they made the one they thought Robin would want them to.” Snow rationalises. 

“No.” Regina begins to pace the kitchens. “No.”

“We’ll send out search parties at first light, I swear to you Regina, we won’t rest until we find him.” David vows.

“First light?” Regina looks at him, horrified. “That’s hours away, he’ll freeze to death. What if he’s hurt?” Her mind is racing.

“Going out into that storm in the dark is suicide.” Snow says.

“I know you don’t want to hear it Regina but this isn’t Storybrooke, we don’t have flashlights and cell phones or GPS or anything. The smart play here is to wait until morning.” David agrees. 

Regina bites her bottom lip. 

“Fine.” She agrees. “But we leave at first light.” 

“Agreed.” David nods and with that he and Snow leave to make plans for the search parties.

“I’m going to check on the boys.” Regina tells Granny before making a hasty retreat from the kitchens.

 

 

“I assume there’s nothing I can say to talk you out of this.” Granny greets Regina as she enters the stables in darkness, only the light of the moon and the nearby lights of the palace illuminating it. 

“I should have known. Did you tell on me?” Regina asks in a childish voice.

“Do you think I’d be standing here alone in the dark if I told either of them what you were planning?” Granny asks. 

“So you’re not going to try and stop me?” Regina asks, slightly surprised.

“No point.” Granny says with a shrug. “You’re going to go either way. You may as well go well supplied.” She tosses a bag at Regina’s feet. “I’ll watch the boys.” She confirms the question that hasn’t been asked as she walks passed Regina back towards the palace. “Just don’t get yourself killed.” She tosses over her shoulder.

Regina looks after her for a moment, slightly dumbfounded by what’s just happened. But it passes quickly, she’s got a job to do.

She saddles one of the horses and then loads him with the bag Granny’s just given her and mounts him, pulling her hood up before taking him out into the storm. 

She heads for the river, the rain is torrential and she’s soaked through within a few minutes. 

“Oh my god.” She can’t help but say out loud when she reaches the river. It’s ferocious and raging, swelling it’s banks. The thought of Robin being thrown into it is horrifying. She looks down to where the bridge should be, where it used to be. It’s been washed away. 

She closes her eyes for a moment, deciding what to do. 

He’s not dead. She’s sure of it, sure she would know. 

A bolt of lightening lights up the sky for a second and the horse becomes uneasy. 

“Easy boy.” Regina strokes his mane. “Just a little while longer, I promise.” She tells him, taking off to follow the bank of the river. 

She keeps her eyes trained on the river and it’s banks, focusing as best she can in the poor light. She’s not sure how long has passed but she realizes she can hardly even feel the reins in her hands anymore they’re so cold. She knows she’s been out here too long. 

“Just a little further.” She urges the horse onwards.

It’s been hours now and she’s beginning to lose hope. To lose faith in her feeling that if something terrible had happened she would just know. 

She’s on the verge of giving up when she sees it. A heap on the bank of the river. She’s not sure what it is she’s seeing at first, but when she gets closer she’s sure. She dismounts, grabbing the reins and running towards him. 

“Robin!” She’s down on her knees in the mud, cupping his face. “Robin wake up!” She pleads, desperate to see his blue eyes.

He coughs and splutters for a moment. 

“Milady.” He looks up at her, a little disorientated. “You’re all wet.” He says with a dopey smile. 

She laughs and then kisses him. 

“Are you hurt?” She asks.

“I don’t believe so.” He replies, moving his arms and legs. “I’m just tired.” 

“I know, it’s the cold. Come on, we need to get you up.” She struggles to pull him up. 

He works with her as best he can and they finally get him to his feet. 

“Think you can get on the horse?” She asks doubtfully, knowing the answer, if how difficult it was to get him on his feet was anything to go by. 

“I can try.” He says sleepily.

‘Robin! Stay with me.” She shouts. “We need to find shelter, we won’t make it back to the palace on foot.” 

They’re trudging through the mud, him leaning heavily on her as the effects of the cold take their toll. 

Another bolt of lightening hits and she’s sure they’re getting closer, the thunder is coming quicker after each burst. She’s sure she saw something though, a dwelling in the distance when the lightening lit up the sky. She sends up a silent prayer that this isn’t just some sort of mirage and pulls Robin in that direction. 

It takes three times as long as it should but the finally reach it. It’s barely more than a hut but there’s an overhanging roof to provide some shelter for the horse and it seems to be waterproof enough. It’s certainly better than nothing. 

She pulls the door open and sends up a silent prayer of thanks to the gods that there’s no signs of water inside. 

“Robin, come on, we need to get you out of these wet clothes.” She tells him, starting to peel layers off him.

“You haven’t even bought me dinner.” He slurs slightly as he says it with a dopey smile and she’s read enough to know about hypothermia. 

“Robin, come on. We need to warm you up.” She opens the bag Granny had given her and curses when she realizes it’s soaked through too.

She looks around and finds some blankets, one of the benefits of the land being subjected to a dark curse was plenty of empty but well stocked dwellings. 

Once Robin is stripped down and bundled up in the bed she turns her attention to the fire place before she realizes she’s never actually started a fire in the traditional way and she’s not entirely sure how to go about. 

She tries her best to get her shaking hands to co-operate with her and spark a fire but she can’t get them to co-ordinate what she’s trying to do with the flint. She feels herself start to give in to the exhaustion and recognizes that Robin isn’t the only one who needs to warm up. 

She strips off all her wet clothes and climbs under the covers with him. Getting as close to him as possible. 

“You’re shivering.” Robin mumbles, pulling her even closer and kissing her forehead. 

She gives in to the exhaustion then, letting sleep take over, feeling safe and loved in his arms.

 

 

She awakes the next morning to the feeling of someone watching her.

She opens her eyes to find Robin with his head propped up on his hand, his elbow on the bed, watching her intently, she can tell by the light it’s just after dawn. She realizes there’s a fire roaring in the hearth. 

“What?” She asks with a smile.

“That was a bloody stupid thing you did last night.” He tells her seriously.

She sighs, rolling over to face away from him.

“It worked didn’t it?” She closes her eyes, fully intending to go back to sleep.

“That’s not the point!” He gently pulls her by the shoulder to lay on her back. “You could have died.” He stares into her eyes as he says it.

“You would have.” She counters.

“As far as you knew I was already dead.” He argues, he knows what his men saw.

“No. I knew you weren’t.” She tells him, absolutely sure.

He frowns, she’s not usually one for irrational statements like that.

“I could feel it.” She shrugs. “I don’t know how else to explain it.” 

He’s looking at her again, like he used to when the first met, like she’s a puzzle for him to work out. He seems to decide to give up on figuring it out and kisses her passionately. 

“I’ve missed you.” She whispers when he pulls back for a moment and rests his forehead against hers. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry I left yesterday.” He counters. “I should have stayed with you, we should have been together.” 

“No, I understand.” She says sadly. “I’ve been acting like I’m the only one who lost something.” 

“Regina.” He sighs, pulling away and sitting up on the side of the bed. 

She follows, kneeling behind him, her hands on his shoulders.

“I can’t keep having these conversations.” He rubs his hands over his face. “We both lost her and we’ve both had to grieve in our own ways. I don’t want there to be blame anymore, I just want us to move forward.”

“That’s what I want too.” Regina leans against his back, enjoying the warmth of his skin against hers.

“Is it though?” He asks, taking one of her hands that’s resting on his chest in his. 

“Of course!” She answers, kissing his neck.

He hesitates for a minute, before deciding they might as well put it all on the table.

“Granny told me.” He says quietly.

She freezes, he can feel her whole body stiffen against his.

“Told you what?” She asks cautiously.

“The other reason you haven’t wanted us…to be close.” His old-fashioned sensibilities won’t let him outright say it.

“I see.” She says. 

“I understand.” He says with a sigh.

“I don’t think you do.” She kisses his neck again. 

“Regina, you don’t have to do this to prove anything.” He tries to move away.

“That’s not what this is.” She pulls him back, closer to her again, moving her hands over his chest. 

“Then what is it?” He asks, turning around to face her. 

“I love you.” She kisses him. “I trust you.” She lies back on the bed, pulling him to come with her so he’s above her, his weight resting on elbows. “And I don’t want my fear to be between us.” 

“Are you sure?” He asks, looking into her eyes for any signs of doubt.

“Yes.” She doesn’t breaking his eye contact. “I trust you.” She tells him. 

He can see it then, she doesn’t just mean she trusts him with this, she’s saying she trusts that he won’t ever let her go down that dark path again. She’s trusting him with her body, her heart and her soul. It almost overwhelms him for a moment.

“I’m so sick of being the one standing in the way of my own-” She catches herself. “Of our happiness. I am not going to let my life be ruled by a fear of something that might happen.” She tells him, full of conviction. She means every word.

He just stares into her eyes, looking at her with such love it’s her who’s overwhelmed now until she’s hooking her hand at the back of his neck and pulling him down to her again.


	54. Chapter 54

_Enchanted Forest - 2 weeks later_

“How many times are we going to have this conversation?” Regina asks in frustration.

The council has gathered for yet another meeting to discuss the progress on plans to return to Storybrooke.

“I don’t see what other options we have.” Emma’s equally frustrated.

“It’s suicide. Even if we had magic.” Regina makes the same argument as she has done at every one of these pointless meetings.

“What if we find a way to take magic out of the equation.” Snow’s thinking out loud.

“What do you mean?” Regina asks with a frown.

“Like with the cuff Greg Mendell used on you.” Snow explains.

Regina’s mind is too busy working on what Snow’s saying to be bothered by the memory.

“Maybe.” She agrees. “It’s not like those things are just lying around though.”

“I think I might know a place.” Hook offers.

“You do?” Emma asks.

“Aye, well, somewhere to start anyway.” He replies.

“There’s still the question of how we would get the damn thing onto Rumple. It’s not like he’d let any of us near enough to do it.” Regina argues.

“Belle could.” Robin suggests.

“We’d have to find a way to smuggle it to her.” David reasons.

“Plenty of ways to do that.” Hook says with an devilish grin.

“None of it matters unless we can get a cuff though.” Snow brings them back to the point. 

“Aye. I’ll set off first thing tomorrow. I fear it may take some time to locate one though.” Hook tells them.

“I’ll come with you.” Emma declares, much to the alarm of her parents. 

“We don’t have a lot of time. The weather’s already turning, we’re not well supplied for a winter here.” Snow tells them what they all already know. “If we have to spend the entire winter in this realm we’re going to lose people.” 

“I don’t understand, you guys were back here for a winter before?” Emma asks.

“Last time there had been people living here while we gone.” Regina explains. “Everyone got swept up in the second curse, the fields weren’t planted, the animals have broken out of their pens. There’s absolutely no infrastructure. There’s very little for us to stockpile to see us through the winter.” 

“Oh.” Is all Emma can manage as it occurs to her that she’s suddenly glad she’s never actually going to have to run a kingdom.

“Yeah.” Regina lets out a resigned sigh. Robin puts his hand over hers and gives it a reassuring squeeze. 

“At least we’ve got a plan now.” Snow says with an ever optimistic smile.

“Not much of one.” Regina mutters.

“Do you have a better idea?” David asks.

“No.” She admits with a huff. “Say we do, somehow, get the cuff on Rumple, then what? We ask him politely to send us back?” She asks.

“We…will cross that bridge when we get to it.” Snow replies brightly.

“This is only works if we have leverage.” Regina’s mind is working as she speaks, but she doesn’t voice her thoughts.

“We’ll figure something out.” Emma joins her mother in optimism. “Maybe just putting the cuff on will be enough to stop whatever’s blocking our magic.” She shrugs.

“Maybe.” Regina replies, her tone implying she doesn’t believe that for a second. 

“Perhaps while Emma and Hook are looking for a cuff we should try and make contact with Belle?” Robin suggest.

“Right now, literally the only thing going for this plan is the element of surprise.” Regina replies. “If we go to the dark castle we risk losing that.”

“Agreed.” David surprises Regina by agreeing. 

“So what? We just sit here twiddling our thumbs?” Robin asks, frustrated with the situation.

“No, we make preparations for winter as best we can in case we have to stay here through it.” David tells him. “I know we’re all fixated on the idea of getting back to Storybrooke but we have to prepare for the fact that may not happen quickly, or at all.” 

“David’s right.” Regina agrees, causing the whole group to turn at look at her with surprised expressions. “Believe me, I don’t like it any more than any of you, but we have to prepare to stay here. We need to stockpile as much as we can possibly gather as quickly as we can and we have to figure out rationing and some form of medical supplies.” The ruler in her is speaking now, she feels responsible for taking care of all these people. 

“So that’s the plan then.” Snow draws the meeting to a close. “Emma and Hook will find and a cuff and the rest of us will prepare for winter.”

There’s a mumble of general agreement and everyone except Robin and Regina stands and leaves the room. 

“Are you alright?” Robin waits until everyone has left to ask.

She turns to him with a rueful smile. 

“Not really.” She admits. “You know how much I don’t want to be here.” She takes a deep breath. “But it is what it is. As long as I have you and the boys I’m home.” 

“We’ll find a way to get back.” He promises. 

“I know.” She smiles, but she can feel her faith in that happening ebbing away.


	55. Chapter 55

_Enchanted Forest - 4 months later_

The winter had been a long and hard one, they’d lost more than a few people to pneumonia’s and other illness’s they knew could have been easily dealt with in Storybrooke. Their rations had barely lasted. 

Spring was here now and people were feeling slightly more hopeful. Hunting parties were returning every day now with supplies. 

Regina spent most days in the kitchen helping granny prepare meals for everyone, both of them watching over Lucas in the crib that had been set up for him in the kitchen. He was able to stand holding the bars now, desperately trying to walk to but not quite there yet. Regina and Granny were closer than ever, though neither would admit it.

Regina enters the kitchen, carrying Lucas, as she has done most mornings.

“Morning.” Granny greets her in her customary way. 

Regina glares at her. 

“Feeling out of sorts this morning are we?” Granny asks, the picture of innocence. 

“Drop the act, I know you know.” Regina scowls. “You probably knew before me didn’t you?”

“Probably.” Granny laughs. 

“I don’t find this particularly funny.” Regina’s still scowling. “You could have said something.” She puts Lucas into the crib, she smiles at him and then turns back to Granny, scowl firmly back in place.

“Yes. I could.” Granny says enigmatically. “But I thought it best you figure it out for yourself.”

“I can’t do this.” Regina begins to pace. “Not again. Certainly not here!” 

“Then I suggest you find a way to get us out of here.” Granny tells her, but sits down as she does so, rubbing her chest with a grimace. 

Regina looks at her with concern.

“What’s wrong?” She asks.

“Nothing. Indigestion.” Granny stands up again and readying her work for the day.

Regina eyes her suspiciously. 

“You better not be faking something to stop me being mad at you.” She scowls.

“Would I?” Granny asks, the picture of innocence. “Anyway, you and he have been like a pair of teenagers the last few months, what did you think would happen?” 

Regina scowls at her again and stalks out of the room.

She’s still wearing the same expression when she enters her and Robin’s chambers. She’d been fairly sure before, but she knew Granny would be able to confirm her suspicions, she wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to know exactly how the wolf’s senses made that possible.

“Well?” Robin asks. 

She’d shared her suspicions with him last night.

“I was right.” Regina nods.

Robin’s face cracks into a wide smile. 

Regina feels tears filling her eyes as she looks at him. She can’t bear the possibility of disappointing him again.

“I’m sorry my love, I just can’t pretend I’m not happy about this.” He crosses the distance between them and envelopes her in a hug. 

“I can.” She retorts. “Only I’m not pretending.”

“I know you’re scared.” Robin tries to comfort her. 

“No, you don’t. I’d be scared if we were in Storybrooke and had modern medicine and I had my magic and could cast a protection spell.” She tells him. “Here? Here I’m petrified and defenceless!” 

“We’ll find a way to get back.” Robin kisses the top of her head.

“It’s been seven months Robin.” Regina sounds dejected. 

“And it was a year the last time.” He tries to offer some hope.

“And last time it took the dark curse! Which, even if that was an option, which it’s most definitely not, I don’t have magic!” She pushes away from him, turning her back to him to face out the balcony. 

“Regina…” Robin reaches out to touch her shoulder but she pulls away.

“I don’t want anyone to know.” She tells him resolutely. 

“What do you mean?” Robin asks with a frown.

“About…this.” She gestures toward her still flat stomach. “You and Granny are the only two who know and that’s how it’s got to stay.” 

“People might start to wonder.” He smiles.

“Let them.” She replies. “They can’t hurt what they don’t know about.” 

If it was anybody else talking she might sound paranoid but given her history, Robin had to give her credit, she was actually taking it better than he expected. 

“You have my word.” He vows. 

She turns then and kisses him. 

“I do love you, you know that?” She asks.

“I do.” He confirms. “And I love you.” He tells her solemnly. 

“And you know that it’s not that I’m not happy.” She admits awkwardly. 

“I understand.” He reassures her, kissing her forehead and pulling her close.

“No matter what, we’ll get through this, together.” He vows.


	56. Chapter 56

_Storybrooke_

“Gold has him at his cabin.” Regina tells the group gathered around her hospital bed what she’d told Granny already.

“And you know this how?” Emma asks sceptically.

“I saw it!” Regina says emphatically.

“Regina, you’ve got to know how crazy that sounds.” David tells her.

“Really Prince Charming. It sounds crazy to you?” She asks sarcastically.

“It kind of makes sense actually.” Snow’s thinking as she says it. 

“How’s that?” Hook asks.

“Well Regina and Robin are soul mates, they’re tied together in a way we don’t really understand fully. Whatever has been happening to her, it’s probably what’s been happening to him.” Snow reasons. 

“That’s hardly reassuring.” Hook quips. 

“You’ve all been out in the woods looking for him, no one’s been to Gold’s cabin have they?” Regina asks. 

“No.” Emma admits. “It wasn’t where I remembered it being.” 

“Oh it’s there.” Regina tells them. “He’s cloaked it.” She shifts uncomfortably on the bed, the ache she’s had in her lower back since waking intensifying.

She throws the covers back and starts making a move to get up.

Several cries of her name, one “Mom!” and a “For pity’s sake girl!” greet that move.

“Aside from the fact you appear to be hours away from giving birth, you hardly look like you’re in any condition for a fight.” Hook voices what they’re all thinking.

“I have to do this.” Regina tells them. “It’s between me and him. It’s always been between me and him.” 

“It may have started that way.” Snow admits. “But we’re your family and we’ve got you.” 

“This is all very heartwarming but he’s still the dark one, how can we hope to defeat him?” Hook asks.

“With my help.” Comes the answer from the doorway. Belle stands taking in the scene before her. “He’ll listen to me.” She declares. 

“No offence Belle but we have no idea what’s happened over the last year, how can you be sure?” David asks.

“Because.” She reaches into her jacket. “I can make him listen.” She pulls out the dagger. 

“How did you…?” Regina asks.

“It was with my things when I woke up.” Belle shrugs. “I don’t know if it’s his attempt to show he trusts me or if it’s an accident but, there it was.”

“So we force him to let Robin go, then what?” Henry asks.

“I don’t know.” Belle admits.

“He won’t stop.” Henry says. “Grandpa’s had chance after chance to change and he hasn’t.” 

“It’s not like we can kill him.” Hook says.

They all look at him in surprise.

“Oh believe me, there’s nothing I’d like more, but whoever does it becomes the next dark one.” He reminds them.

“Then what? We banish him?” David asks. 

“That didn’t really work last time either.” Belle grimaces, forcing Rumple over the town line was not one of her fondest memories.

“We have to do something, he’s killing Robin!” Regina’s near hysterical at the fact they know where he is but they’re still standing in this room. She sees the looks on their faces when she looks up. “I swear to god if any of you tell me to calm down I will burn this place to the ground.” 

A few of them hold their hands up in mock surrender. 

Henry sits down next to his mom. 

“We’re going to get him back mom, I promise.” He reassures her, taking her hand.


	57. Chapter 57

_Enchanted Forest - 3 months later_

“They’re back! Everyone! They’re back!” Grumpy’s holler can be hear throughout almost the entire palace.

Everyone gathers at the entranceway to greet Emma and Hook, finally returned from their travels. No one had said anything in front of Snow or David, but many feared with the worst when the pair hadn’t returned after a few months. Even more after 7 months passed.

“Emma!” Snow throws her arms around her daughter after pushing through the gather crowd. “I’ve missed you!” She holds her tightly. 

David shakes Hook’s hand. 

“It’s good to see you.” He tells him with a nod, a silent thanks for bringing his daughter back.

Snow releases Emma and her father hugs her then.

Robin and Regina make their way through the crowd, standing to the side while Emma’s parents greet her.

“Mom!” Henry comes barrelling through the crowd, almost knocking his mom over with the force with which he runs into her.

“Hey kid!” Emma beams. “I’ve missed you.” 

“Emma.” Regina greets her with a smile once she’s let go of Henry. 

Emma surprises even herself then by grabbing Regina and hugging her tightly. As she pulls her closer Emma feels the definite rounding of her belly that had been disguised by her baggier top. 

“Regina!” Emma is about to congratulate her but her mother catches her eye over Regina’s shoulder and sends her a look that tells her not say anything. “I’ve missed you more than I thought.” She awkwardly diverts her started sentence, though the sentiment isn’t untrue.

Regina looks at her oddly.

“Did you find it?” Regina asks.

“Let’s talk.” Emma indicates she wants to speak to the council privately.

They all begin to head to council chambers. Emma walks with her arm around Henry and falls in step with her mother.

“I see I’ve missed a few developments around here.” Emma’s eyes flick to Regina as she speaks.

“I’ll fill you in on what I know later.” Snow replies. “Just don’t say anything.” She instructs. “It’s so good to have you back.” She tells her daughter with a smile, putting her arm around her waist and pulling her close from the opposite side to wear Henry is.

Despite the fact that Regina had taken to wearing riding pants and baggy tops for the last few months, Snow had realised what was going on but hasn’t said anything to anyone but David, waiting for Regina to be ready to tell people. She’s fairly sure Granny knows too, they’ve had a few conversations where they’ve danced around the subject, neither actually saying anything, but given how close Regina and Granny seem to have become, it wouldn’t surprise Snow at all if she knew. Snow finds herself drifting off on a tangent, wishing that she and Regina could be that close again, she feels like they’ve drifted apart again the last few months. 

“Mom?” Emma’s voice snaps Snow out of her reverie. 

“What?” Snow asks.

“Did you hear any of what I just said?” Emma asks as they enter the council chamber. 

“Sorry.” Snow apologises genuinely. 

“You ok?” Emma asks, concerned. 

“Fine.” Snow answers with a smile. “Just thinking.”

Emma looks at her mother oddly. 

Everyone takes their seats around the council table and an expectant silence falls over the group. 

“Well?” Regina asks impatiently. 

“We didn’t find one.” Emma replies. 

Everyone in the room seems to visibly deflate at the news. 

“Yet.” Hooks adds drawing an angry look from Emma. 

“We talked about this.” She mutters under her breath.

“No, you talked.” He replies loudly. 

“Killian.” Emma says sternly. 

“It’s worth a shot.” He says with a shrug.

“What is?” David asks.

“Well, I was thinking that there’s a chance one of the lost boys we left behind in Neverland copied their former leader, we heard tell of a shadow stealing children away recently.” He explains.

“And you want to use a child as bait?” David asks.

“To get to Neverland?” Snow asks.

“Aye. If there’s any of those magic inhibiting cuff thingies still around they’re bound to be there.” Hook reasons.

“Absolutely not.” Regina’s adamant. 

“Wait a minute Regina.” David argues. “Let’s hear him out.” 

“No, there is no way I’m going along with any plan where any of my children are used for bait.” She tells him, glaring at Hook for even suggesting such a thing. 

“I don’t know what else to suggest, unless you’ve suddenly got your magic back and can get us all out of here…” Hook maintains eyes contact with her. 

“You know I haven’t been able to use any magic since we got here.” Regina huffs. 

Granny loudly clears her throat and they all turn to look at her. 

“Tickle in my throat, sorry.” She lies, but she’s looking right at Regina, conveying clearly that she has something to say to her. 

“This is pointless.” Regina declares angrily, standing up. “We’re not using children as bait, end of discussion. I’ve got work to do.” She turns and walks out of the room. 

“It is almost lunch time.” Granny says by way of excusing herself too. 

“What?” They’re halfway down the corridor before Regina asks. 

“Well, it’s not strictly true is it?” Granny says coyly. 

“What isn’t?” Regina asks with a frown. 

“Well, last time I checked, pulling your own heart out of chest and then putting it back requires magic.” Granny explains. 

“Oh.” Regina stops mid-stride. With everything else that had gone on that night she’d forgotten about it.

“Yes, oh.” Granny says. “I didn’t want to bring it up again unless I had to.”

“I have no idea how I did that.” Regina tells her. 

Granny gives her a doubtful look. 

“It’s not like I’ve not been trying. Nobody wants out of here more than me.” Regina’s defensive. 

“Well what other explanation is there?” Granny asks, and she’s truly asking, Regina knows her well enough now to know that. “I’ll deal with lunch, you get to the library.” 

 

 

“Regina, what on earth is going on? You’ve been in here for hours!” Robin strides into the library, a mixture of concern and curiosity on his face. 

“I’ll be down for dinner, just give me a second.” Regina replies absentmindedly. 

“Dinner?” Robin asks, perplexed. “It’s the middle of the night!” 

“Is it?” Regina looks up, suddenly aware that it’s pitch black outside. 

“What is it that’s suddenly so fascinating in here? I thought you’d read everything that could possibly get you and Emma get your magic back twice already?” Robin asks, sitting next to her on a bench at a desk. 

“I did, or at least I thought I did, this is something else.” Regina explains. 

“Tell me what’s going on.” Robin says, he can see how troubled she is. 

“When I said I’ve not been able to use magic at all since we got here, that’s not entirely accurate.” Regina dances around the subject.

“You have your magic back?” Robin asks excitedly. 

“No.” Regina shakes her head, she’s looking down at the table, refusing to make eye contact with him. “I’ve been able to use magic once.” She admits.

“Is that how you found me out in that storm that night?” He asks. 

“No.” She shakes her head again. “But it was that day.” 

“Regina.” He cups her cheek and gently pulls her face round so she’s forced to look at him. “What did you do?” He asks, knowing already he’s not going to like the answer. 

“I…” She hesitates. “I took my heart out.” She tells him, full of shame. 

“I don’t understand.” He’s trying to process what she’s saying.

“I didn’t know how to deal with what I was feeling so I took my own heart out of my chest so it wouldn’t be as hard.” She’s looking down again, she hates admitting this to him. 

“You put it back though?” He asks, putting his hand over her heart to confirm what her already knows. 

“Granny found me.” Regina explains. “She helped me.” She looks up at him. “I’m sorry.” 

“It was months ago.” Robin says. “I wish you’d spoken to me about it, yes, but I’m not angry or upset.” He reassures her. “How? How could you do it if you can’t use your magic?” He asks. 

“That’s just it.” Regina replies. “I don’t think I was using my magic.” 

“What?” Robin asks with a frown. 

She turns on the bench now to face him properly. 

“Have you ever thought about something happening and then it has?” She asks seriously.

“What do you mean?” He asks, still frowning. 

“Like have you ever wished for something and then all of a sudden it’s right in front of you?” Regina tries to clarify.

“Regina, I don’t have magic.” Robin replies, understanding where she’s going with this. 

“I think you do.” Regina tells him. “Maybe not a lot, but some.” 

“How is that possible?” Robin is very confused.

“Roland had to get it from somewhere.” She tells him.

“Roland doesn’t have…” He trails off as he realizes, he’d been adamant about Caitlin being a girl, he always seems to know what’s bothering Lucas. “Oh.” 

“Yeah. We’ll discuss that later.” Regina promises. “I found this passage she says, shoving a book in front of Robin but then proceeds to tell him what is says anyway as he reads. “It says that those who are soulmates can share everything, even magic.” 

“So you think you used my magic, that I’m still not even convinced I have by the way, to take your heart?” He asks, brow still furrowed in a perplexed frown. 

“I think it’s the only thing that makes sense.” She confirms. “I think Lucas has still been using magic, judging by the assortment of random objects I find in his crib that he can’t possibly have physically reached and he’s brought himself to me more than once.” She explains. “I think whatever Rumple’s done was just to block mine and Emma’s magic specifically because he sees us as the only threat?” 

“How does that help us?” Robin asks. 

“Because it means you might be able to get us home, if I can teach you how to use it.” Regina smiles.


	58. Chapter 58

_Enchanted Forest - 3 months later_

“This is pointless!” Robin declares angrily, knocking the candle he’s been trying to light off the table. He looks over to Regina and he can tell she’s made uneasy by his behaviour. “I’m sorry.” He sighs, picking the candle up and setting it back on the table then walking over to her and putting his hands on her upper arms. “I didn’t mean to lose my temper. It’s just, we’ve been doing this for two months now and there’s not even been so much as a spark. I don’t think I can do this.”

Regina sighs defeatedly. 

“We need to find a way.” Her desperation obvious. 

“We’ll be ok.” He reassures her, his hand reaching out rest on her now decidedly pregnant stomach. “Though I don’t know how much longer you can disguise this.” He smiles. 

“It’s not that.” She sighs again, turning away from him. “It’s not just that.” She clarifies. 

“Then what?” He asks.

“It’s Granny.” Regina turns back to face him, her eyes filled with unshed tears. “She’s too stubborn to admit it but there’s something wrong with her.” 

“What do you mean?” Robin asks, concerned. 

“She’s tired all the time, and I catch her rubbing her chest like she’s in pain, she gets out of breath really easily, I think it’s her heart.” Regina explains. “She won’t talk to me about it but I think she was on medication for it back in Storybrooke. It’s probably something like angina, it could be a death sentence here!” 

“Calm down.” Robin pulls her into a hug. “We’ll find a way.” 

“We keep saying that, but Hook and Emma came back empty handed again, we’re no further forward.” Regina rambles.

“Look at me.” Robin pulls back from the embrace and looks her straight in the eye. “We will find a way. I promise you.” He vows. 

“Ok.” Regina isn’t convinced but she’s too tired to argue anymore. She pulls him back into a hug, taking comfort in his arms.

She closes her eyes, wishing she could just have her magic back and end this. When she opens them again she gasps. 

“What?” Robin asks, pulling back and looking at her worriedly. 

“The candle!” She says, pointing to it. “It’s lit!” 

“How’s that possible?” He asks. 

“I don’t know.” She replies truthfully. “What were you thinking about just now?” She asks. 

“I don’t know.” He shrugs. “You, how I wish I could just hold you like this forever and keep you safe.” 

She smiles and looks at him with such love it’s almost overwhelming for him. 

“What were you thinking?” He asks. 

“That I love you.” She replies, and it’s not a lie, she always thinks that. “And then I was thinking that I wished I could get my magic back and end this once and for all.” 

“I think we know which one of us did that then.” Robin smiles.

“I still don’t know how though.” Regina says with yet another sigh. 

“What were you thinking about when you took your heart out?” He asks, trying to solve the problem logically. 

“I have no idea.” She shakes her head. “I was a mess. Caitlin obviously.”

“What else?” He pushes. 

“You.” She admits sadly. “That it didn’t seem to matter how much I loved you, I always let you down.” 

He pulls her into another hug and kisses her. 

“You have never ever let me down and you never will.” He tells her resolutely. “But I think I’m starting to understand how this works.” 

Regina frowns at him. 

“If you’re using my magic, which I’m still not entirely convinced I have, it makes sense that you’re accessing when you think about me.” He explains what he’s thinking. “Try putting the candle out.” He instructs her. 

She puts her hand out, brow furrowed in concentration. Nothing happens. 

“You’re over thinking it. Close your eyes.” He instructs her. “Take a deep breath.” 

She looks at him sceptically. 

“Just try it.” He smiles. 

“Fine.” She grumbles and then does as she’s been told. 

“Ok, think about your happiest memory with me.” He continues. 

“Too many to choose just one.” She smiles then.

“Pick one then.” He smiles and even with her eyes closed she can hear it in his voice.

Her smile widens. 

“What is it?” He asks. “Tell me what you’re thinking about.” 

“The first morning we woke up in our bed together.” She begins. “Not in the vault, at home. I slept longer than normal and I woke up and you were just watching me the way you always do.” 

“You are quite a sight to behold milady.” He grins. 

“I was still groggy and I asked you what you were looking at.” She continues.

“And I told you I was looking at the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.” He remembers it too. 

“And I believed you. Even with bed head and no make up on, you made me full like I was the most beautiful woman in the world.” She explains.

“You are.” He confirms. “And then I told you that I loved you.” He’s moved so he’s standing behind her. “Now.” He whispers into her ear. “Don’t think about, just put the candle out.” 

She opens her eyes and sees the flame is extinguished. 

“We might actually have a shot at this!” She grins.

 

 

Robin and Regina gather the council for another meeting the next day to tell them what they discovered last night. 

“Wait, so you’ve got magic?” David asks Robin. 

“Apparently, though I can’t use it.” Robin confirms.

“But Regina can?” Snow asks with a frown.

“Apparently.” Regina agrees.

“This doesn’t make any sense.” Emma frowns.

“We found a book that said soul mates can share everything, even magic.” Regina explains.

“How can you have had magic your whole life and not known?” David asks Robin, still sceptical. 

“I have no idea. Believe me, this is all news to me.” Robin holds his hands up. “Regina says she’s heard tell of people who carry magic but can’t use it themselves.”

“What, like a dormant gene?” David asks. 

“Maybe.” Regina shrugs, the stories she’s heard or read over the years have been vague, at best. 

“So what does this mean? You can use this magic to reopen the portal home?” Emma asks hopefully.

“It means I can try.” Regina tells her. 

“What?” David asks.

“This isn’t like I got my own magic back, this is different, it’s harder to use, it doesn’t feel as, well there’s really no other way to say it, it’s like it’s weaker magic.” She throws a sympathetic look at Robin, worried she might have offended him. 

“So you’re worried you can’t open the portal?” Snow asks.

“I’m worried I won’t be able to keep it open.” Regina admits. “Not long enough for everyone to get through.” 

“Can’t you just go through back to Storybrooke where you’ll have magic and open it from there?” Hook asks as though it’s the most obvious plan in the world.

“Portals are a one way thing, they go from where you open them to the realm you open it in, you can’t send things back and forth across them.” Regina explains.

“Well that’s…inconvenient.” Hook quips. 

“So what? We get as many people through as we can?” David’s planning things in his mind already. 

“I don’t know how many that will be, it could be two, it could be two hundred, it could even be everyone.” Regina frets. 

“There’s something else we need to take into consideration here.” Robin’s been mulling this point over all night. 

“What’s that?” Hook asks.

“Belle.” Robin says. “We can’t just leave her behind with him.” 

Silence falls over the council.

“He’s right.” Granny agrees. 

“This doesn’t change anything I’ve said before about attacking the dark castle.” Regina’s a little shocked that he didn’t say anything to her before he brought it up in front of the council. 

“Maybe not, but Robin’s right, we can’t leave her with the crocodile and all merrily go on our way home.” Hook agrees.

“What if we make it so he has no option but to send us home, all of us.” Robin suggests. 

“What do you mean?” Regina asks. 

“I mean, you said it yourself, we need leverage.” Robin explains. 

“So what? You want to kidnap Belle?” Hook asks. “I mean, I get the idea, but I don’t see how we could pull it off.”

“Regina, do you think you could cast a protection on Belle?” Robin asks, what he doesn’t say is that he knows she can. The first thing she did last night as soon as they figured out a way for her to use his magic was to cast a protection spell on their unborn child. 

“I think so…” She says cautiously. 

“One to stop anyone using magic on her, even the dark one?” Robin needs to be sure, and he’s also explaining his plan. 

“Yes, at least, I think so.” She looks at him oddly. 

“We need to find a way to distract or incapacitate the dark one temporarily, long enough to get you in and out to cast the protection spell.” He’s still thinking this part through. 

“Uh, actually, we may be able to help with that.” Emma sheepishly pulls a small bottle from her pocket. 

“You found squid ink?” Snow exclaims. 

“We didn’t want to say anything, it didn’t seem like there was a use for it, it only stops him for a little while right?” Emma explains.

“Long enough for someone to get in and out of the castle and cast and protection spell.” Hook finishes the thought. 

“How does a protection spell on Belle force Rumple to send us back?” David asks.

“Because he won’t be able to heal Belle with magic.” Regina’s realized what Robin’s plan is. 

“Heal her from what?” Snow asks. 

“From whatever we do to her.” Granny has figured it out too.

“Whatever we do that can’t be dealt with here but can with the medicine in Storybrooke.” David says nodding in agreement. 

“You can’t be serious.” Snow shakes her head. 

“I don’t know what else we can do mom.” Emma reasons as she comes round to the idea. 

“This is insane.” Snow’s appalled. 

“We can try to find a way to talk to Belle, I bet she’d be willing to do this.” Hook says. 

“To risk her life?” Snow is decidedly unhappy with the way this conversation is going. 

“Better than spending it as a prisoner.” Granny argues.

“She’s already spent too much time captive.” Regina winces. 

“I can’t believe we’re even considering this.” Snow is still shocked. 

“They have a point.” David doesn’t like it much either but he’s coming round to it the more he thinks about it. 

“David!” Snow can’t believe he’s considering it. 

“There’s another slight problem with this plan beside the obvious moral quandary.” Hook says looking at Regina. 

“And what’s that?” Regina asks, challenging him.

“I’m sorry, are we all just going to ignore the figurative and really almost literal elephant in the room.” Hook says, always one for tact. 

“Killian!” Emma hisses. 

“Well come on, you’re not fooling anyone love, we all have eyes.” Hook continues.

Looks are shot about the room by various people. He’s not wrong, they all knew but before anyone can say anything Robin is on his feet, angry.

“You need to watch the tone you take with my wife!” He shouts at Hook. 

There’s a few surprised gasps.

“Did you two get married?” Snow gapes.

“No, I…it was a slip of the tongue.” Robin explains. 

There’s a brief silence.

“As terribly as he may have put it, Hook does have a point.” Emma tries to move them along. 

“Regina, I understand why you haven’t wanted to say anything, but it’s pretty undeniable now.” Snow tries a slightly more tactful approach. 

“They’re right.” Robin realizes he’s gotten himself carried away with his plan. “It’s too risky for you to come.” 

“It only works if I come.” Regina argues, looking only at him. 

“We’ll find another way.” Hook says, and it’s obvious that his comments, as untactful as they were, were coming from concern. 

“We keep saying that.” Regina’s voice is full of exasperation. “We’ve been here more than a year and this is the first solid plan we’ve come up with. People are dying here.” Her eyes flicking briefly to Granny. “Of things they could easily be treated for in Storybrooke. Children are at risk here without vaccines.” She continues. “We need to get back before more people die.” 

“Aye love, we all understand that but sending you, in your current condition, into the belly of the beast hardly seems wise.” Hook argues.

“What choice do we have?” Regina replies. “We sit here and watch people we love die of things we know could be managed easily?” 

That gets Granny’s attention, she narrows her eyes, scrutinizing Regina.

“I don’t think we can let you Regina, not in good conscience.” David adds.

“I’m sorry, did I miss the part where I asked for any of your permission?” Regina asks sarcastically. “The only two people involved in this decision are me and Robin.” 

“Regina…” Robin wants to argue against his own plan.

“I have to do this.” She counters before he can begin. “You know I do. You know why.” 

“Ok.” He agrees reluctantly. He’s not happy about it despite the fact it was his own idea. 

“So that’s the plan then?” Hook asks sarcastically. “We send the heavily pregnant woman in to perform some magic on Belle then grievously injure Belle while we hope that the crocodile remains incapacitated long enough for us to escape?” 

“No. We’re gonna bring Belle out.” David states. 

“It doesn’t matter where we take her, he’ll be able to find her.” Regina argues. 

“Can’t you stop him doing a locator spell?” Emma asks. “I dunno, cloak her somehow?” 

“Maybe if I had my own magic and the supplies in my vault.” Regina says with a frustrated sigh. 

“This is insane!” Snow exclaims. 

“It is.” Regina agrees. “But it’s what happening.” 

“I say we do some reconnaissance first.” Emma suggests. “Watch the castle for a while. He used to let Belle out right? Maybe he’s doing that again and we can talk to her.” 

“Maybe.” David agrees. 

“It’s worth a try aye.” Hook nods.

“Then we’re agreed.” David declares. “We’ll go tomorrow and start gathering intel on the situation.” 

There’s murmurs of agreement from around the table and then everyone gets up and starts leaving the room, Snow grabs David and Emma’s arms pulling them out of the room, clearly about to start a lecture. Hook follows, feeling the need to support Emma. 

Robin turns to Regina awkwardly, suddenly aware of his outburst earlier. 

“I uh…” He begins. 

“We’ll talk later ok.” She stands from her chair and then leaning over to kiss him. “I’ve got to get back to the kitchen and get dinner finished.” 

He holds her hand as she walks away, only letting it go when she’s physically gone to far for him to hold onto it any longer. 

Granny is waiting for outside the door.

“I’m coming.” Regina’s expecting a lecture about the importance of meal prep.

“What did you mean in there?” Granny asks accusingly as they walk side by side towards the kitchens. 

“Which part?” Regina feigns innocence. 

“You know very well which part.” Granny’s annoyed now. 

“I meant just what I said.” Regina says enigmatically. 

“You listen to me girl.” Granny spins on her heel so she’s facing Regina, forcing them both to stop walking. “You are not putting your’s and that baby’s life in danger for me!” 

“I knew you were lying!” Regina’s as irate as Granny now. “Indigestion my ass.” 

“It doesn’t matter what’s wrong with me.” Granny dismisses her. “I will not allow you to risk your lives for mine.”

“Try and stop me.” Regina dares. 

They stare at each other for a beat before Regina continues on towards the kitchens. Dinner is prepared in silence that night. 

 

 

Regina gets back to her and Robin’s room late, she’d been kept busy through the meal and then she had some things to prepare for tomorrow. That’s how she’d rationalized it anyway, she’d been avoiding the others. Not wanting to have to discuss her ‘condition’. 

“Where were you?” Robin asks, he’s sitting up in bed, reading.

“I had a lot to do in the kitchens.” She replies moving to the vanity and letting her hair down from the loose ponytail she’d taken to wearing it in while working in the kitchens.

“I came down there to find you.” He tells her, putting his book down on the bedside table. 

“I went for a walk.” She admits. “I just wanted to clear my head a little.” She says as she brushes her hair. 

“If this is about what I said…” He sighs. 

She frowns in response and he realizes she’s not sure what he’s referring to. 

“When I called you my wife.” He clarifies. 

“Oh.” She’s surprised. She finishes with her hair and moves towards the bed. “That? No. That was just a slip of the tongue like you said.” She smiles, sitting down on the bed and rubbing her face tiredly. 

He sighs again. 

“That’s just it.” He tells her. “It wasn’t just a slip of the tongue Regina. That’s how I feel, that’s how I think about you.” He admits. 

Before he even knows what he’s doing he’s pulled the covers back got up and rounded the bed to stand in front of her. 

“This isn’t exactly how I planned on doing this.” He admits as he gets down on one knee in front of her. 

Regina gasps as she realizes what’s happening. 

“Regina Mills, you’re the first thing I think about in the morning and the last thing at night. I want to wake up with you every morning. You’re the mother of my children and I love you more than life itself.” Suddenly he’s pulling a small box out of his pocket. “Will you do me the great honour of becoming my wife?” He asks, opening the box to reveal a beautiful white gold ring with a large princess cut diamond. 

She’s stunned into silence.

“Say something.” He prompts as the silence draws on.

“Yes.” She finally says quietly. 

He’s up off the floor in an instant, standing up and leaning down to kiss her. Then he pulls back and puts the ring on her finger. 

She’s smiling but then he notices her expression change slightly, she’s wistful, lost in her own thoughts.

“What are you thinking?” He asks.

“Nothing.” She lies, shaking her head, trying to shake the thought out of it. 

“Regina.” He cautions. 

“I just, I can’t help it, I’m so happy right now I was just thinking that I wonder when the other shoe is going to drop.” She instinctively places a hand protectively over her unborn child. 

“We don’t have to go through with this plan.” He sits next to her and takes her other hand. 

“We do.” She disagrees. “For so many reasons.” 

“It doesn’t have to be right now, we could wait.” He lays his free hand next to hers, feeling their child move beneath it. 

“I don’t know how long she’s got.” Regina tells him worriedly. “And it’s not just that.” She continues. “We lost so many people this winter to simple illnesses. What if there’s an outbreak of something with the kids?” She worries. “I’m terrified every time Roland so much as scrapes his knee, what if it gets infected?”

“Ok.” He says, giving her hand a gentle reassuring squeeze. “But I want to keep you and him as far away from each other as possible.” Robin tells her and he doesn’t have to specify which ‘him’ he’s referring to.

“You know this was all your idea.” She says with a rueful smile.

“I know.” He admits. “I was worrying about Belle and I got a bit carried away with myself. I don’t ever want to do anything that places you or this little one in danger.” He gently rubs his hand on her belly. 

“You’re right though.” Regina tells him. “We can’t just leave her with him. I can’t. I owe it to her after everything I’ve done to her to try.” 

“I don’t think she’s one to hold a grudge.” Robin tries to ease her guilt.

“I imprisoned her for nearly 30 years Robin, a saint would hold a grudge and deservedly so.” Regina retorts, not one to shy away from her own actions. 

“Perhaps.” He concedes. “But I doubt she would want to put our child at risk.” Robin worries that by voicing his plan he’s done just that.

“I can protect this baby.” Regina tells him determinedly. “Now that I know what I need to protect her from.” 

“Her?” Robin cocks his head to the side. It’s the first he’s heard her refer to their child as a girl. 

“Roland told me the other day.” She shrugs. “Out of the blue he just came up when I was sitting eating lunch, put his hand over my stomach and asked how much longer he had to wait to meet his baby sister.” She smiles. “Ever since I’ve been thinking of her as…her.” She shrugs again.

“A girl.” Robin marvels. 

“Well there’s a 50/50 chance anyway.” Regina laughs. 

Regina becomes distracted for a moment, looking at the new addition to her left hand, inspecting it. 

“This ring, it isn’t from the enchanted forest is it?” She asks.

“No.” Robin admits sheepishly. “I’ve been carrying it around for some time now.” 

“I don’t understand.” Regina’s confused, he’s obviously had it the entire they’ve been in the enchanted forest.

“I kept waiting for the right time. At first I thought, when we got back to Storybrooke, and then things just kept happening that made it seem inappropriate.” He tells her honestly. “But I’ve wanted to do this for a long time.” He smiles, unsure of how she’s going to react. 

She’s looking at him, and he’s not sure he can read her expression.

“I don’t know, after what we’ve decided on doing, I realized there’s no such thing as the perfect time, the time we have is precious and I don’t want to spend another minute of it without you knowing exactly how I feel about you.” He continues.

Her expression cracks into a wide smile and she leans forward and kisses him again, cupping his face in her hands.

“I told you once that I never thought I would have this again.” She reminds him. “Now, I can’t imagine my life without you.” 

“You won’t ever have to.” He grins. 

She smiles, but there’s an edge to it.

“Let’s neither of us make promises we can’t keep.” She says sadly. 

“We’ll get through this.” He assures her. “All of us.” He protectively touches her swollen abdomen. “Our daughter, or son, will be born safely in Storybrooke and I’ll be by your side.” 

“I love you.” She whispers. 

He can tell she’s not convinced.

“I love you too.” He tells her.


	59. Chapter 59

_Storybrooke_

Four hours have passed since the group left Regina’s hospital room on their mission to rescue Robin. Despite Regina’s protestations even Henry had joined them. Roland and Neal were left under the protection of the Merry Men, giving them that responsibility the only way they could be convinced not to join on the mission to rescue Robin. Granny had stayed with Regina, watching as she paced around the room like a caged animal. 

“Exactly how much longer are you going to try and hide the fact you’re in labor?” Granny finally asks as she watches Regina trying to breath her way through another contraction. 

Regina scowls at her, annoyed by how perceptive she is. 

“Robin should be here.” Regina tells her once the contraction is passed. 

“Yes, he should.” Granny agrees. “But it seems that little one may well have other ideas.” 

Regina groans as another contraction hits, she’s standing at the bottom of the bed, both hands on the bedrail, leaning forward. 

“Why haven’t they called yet?” She asks. “It’s been hours!” She’s frustrated by the lack of news.

“They’ll call as soon as there’s news.” Granny tries to reassure her. “Are you going to let me go and get the doctor now?” 

“No.” Regina says through gritted teeth. “I’m not even sure I’m actually in labor.” 

Granny cocks an eyebrow, looking at her sceptically. 

Just on cue to undermine her argument, Regina’s water breaks. 

“Fine.” She huffs. 

Granny returns a few minutes later with Whale and a nurse in tow. 

“I hear we’re thinking about having a baby today.” Whale says in his annoyingly cheery voice. 

Regina’s in the same position she was when Granny left, in the grips of another contraction, they’re obviously coming thick and fast. 

A low moan escapes her, much to her own frustration. 

“Ok, let’s get you on the bed so we can examine you.” Whale instructs. 

He silently indicates to the nurse to clean up the mess where Regina’s waters broke and Granny moves to help Regina onto the bed. 

Regina shrugs her off. 

“I’m not an invalid!” She barks harshly at the older woman. 

Granny takes her hands away, she knows better than to be offended by Regina’s tone. 

Once on the bed, lying on her back, Regina looks to Granny. 

“I’m sorry.” She relents. “Please stay.” She holds out her hand, asking for Granny to take it. 

It’s not lost on Granny what a big gesture that is for Regina to make. She takes her hand and comes to the side of the bed, gently pushing an errant hair away from the younger woman’s face.

“I’m not going anywhere.” She reassures her. 

“Well.” Whale says with his customary smug grin. “Things are well underway here, there’ll be another little branch to that already weirdly messed up family tree of yours in a few hours by the look of it, maybe less.”

Granny glares at him. 

“Everything’s moving along pretty quickly.” He says in a more serious tone in response to Granny’s look. “We’ve got a strong heartbeat, everything looks good, but this baby isn’t hanging around in there.” 

“Thank you.” Regina says, much as pains her to thank him for anything. 

“You’re welcome.” Whale tells her sincerely. “I’ll be back shortly to check on you again, I don’t think it’s going be long until showtime.” He walks out of the room to get things prepared for the imminent arrival. 

Regina throws her head back on the pillow after breathing through another contraction.   
“I need Robin.” She says with her eyes closed. 

“Look at me.” Granny instructs. She waits until she has Regina’s full attention. “You can do this.” 

“I can’t.” Regina shakes her head.

“Yes you can.” Granny tells her. “Fact is you don’t have a lot of choice in the matter. You and I both know he’s fighting as hard as he can to get back to you, you have to play your part and make sure you’re both here when he gets here.” Granny squeezes her hand reassuringly. “Meanwhile, you’re stuck with me for whatever it’s worth.” 

Regina gives Granny’s hand a gentle squeeze back in response. 

“Oh I need to get up.” She says abruptly, moving to stand from the bed. She was finding it much easier to cope with the contractions when she was standing. 

Granny moves around the bed and helps her and Regina willingly accepts the help. 

 

Another 40 minutes passes, there’s not much conversation but Granny is there, supporting Regina and reassuring her. Granny has taken Regina’s phone away from her, frustrated with her checking it every two seconds. They’re pacing the room together for what feels like the thousandth time when a wave of magic suddenly washes over them, the whole town, Regina somehow instinctively knows. 

They look at each other for a long moment, confusion evident as their minds try to process the sudden influx of more than a years worth of memories. 

Multiple emotions flicker over both of their faces as they both come to understand why they had suddenly felt so much closer. 

Before either has a chance to say anything a low moan escapes Regina.

“Oh god.” She cries. “I’ve got to push.”


	60. Chapter 60

_Enchanted Forest - 1 month later_

It had taken a week before anyone had caught a glimpse of Belle outside the castle and another one before they were sure she wasn’t being watched enough to risk talking to her.   
Emma and Hook had been the ones to take the plan to her and hadn’t taken long for her to agree. They’d had to agree to wait another week before enacting it though, trying not to raise the dark ones suspicions.

Everyone was on edge with the delays, Regina was key to this plan and every day they waited was another day closer to her delivering. 

Belle set the meeting place, an abandoned cabin a half-days walk from the Dark Castle. It was a long and arduous journey for Regina while heavily pregnant, there was really no comfortable way to travel at this stage in his pregnancy but horseback was certainly not ideal. 

Robin and Regina have been waiting in the cabin for hours, Belle’s late, and Robin’s pacing, anxiety and frustration building. 

“If she said she’ll be here, she’ll be here.” Regina tries to calm him, shifting uncomfortably in the one seat that remained in the cabin. 

“Are you alright?” Robin asks her for what feels like the millionth time. Every time she shifted or grimaced slightly he was fraught with worry.

“I’m fine.” She snaps. “Sorry.” She relents.

The door to the cabin opens then and Belle enters, looking behind her before she shuts the door.

“You made it.” Robin greets her with a hug. 

“Sorry I’m late, it was hard to get away.” She tells him, looking over to Regina who greets her with a nod. 

Regina stands up from the chair. 

“I guess congratulations are in order.” Belle smiles.

“Thanks.” Regina replies uncomfortable with the attention. “We should get this over with.” 

“Are you sure about this Belle?” Robin asks.

“Yes.” She nods resolutely. “I think it might be the only way.” 

“You understand what it means though?” Regina also wants to be sure she understands the implications. 

“I do.” Belle nods again. “And I’m willing to risk it.” She tells them. “What do I do?” She asks, prompting them to continue. 

“I’m going to cast the protection spell, specifically to stop anyone using magic on you, it should mean that he can’t heal you.” Regina tells her. 

“Ok.” Belle agrees. 

Regina closes her eyes, focusing on Robin as she had before, hands outstretched towards Belle, concentrating. 

It took a few minutes but finally, a light emanated from Regina’s hands and surrounded Belle. 

Regina stumbles a few steps backwards, this was by far the most complex spell she’d carried out using Robin’s magic and whether it was that or the fact she was even more heavily pregnant now she could definitely feel it had taken something out of her.

“Are you alright?” Robin is by her side in an instant, steadying her. 

“Yes.” She nods, using a hand to rub her temples for a moment in an attempt to stave off the headache she could feel brewing. “I will be.” She tells him more honestly when he looks at her disbelievingly. 

“Did it work?” Belle asks.

“It worked.” Regina confirms.

“So if I stab myself when I get back to the castle, he can’t heal me?” Belle suggests a way forward.

“No, he shouldn’t be able to.” Regina confirms again.

“I had a thought about that.” Robin offers. “Perhaps it shouldn’t be a self inflicted wound.” 

“Why?” Belle asks, frowning.

“Because this plan hinges on him being desperate enough to save you to send us all back.” Robin explains. “If he knows that you’re in on it with us, there’s a chance he might not.” 

“So what do you suggest?” Regina asks, looking at him with suspicion. She can tell this is not something that has just occurred to him.

“I’m going to go back with you.” He declares to Belle. “Just before we get there, with your permission of course, I’ll wound you with an arrow and then I’ll take you into the Dark Castle and explain our terms to the Dark One.” 

“That’s insane!” Regina explodes.

“It’s far too dangerous.” Belle agrees.

“It’s the only way to be sure it goes to plan.” Robin says with a determined nod. “And to make sure you’re safe.” He says. “To make sure all of you are safe.” 

“Robin, no.” Regina pleads.

“This is the way it has to be.” He tells her resolutely. “It was my plan, I should be the one to see it through.” 

Regina can see he won’t be talked out of this. He comes towards her and pulls her into a hug, then he kisses her and ends up with their foreheads resting against one another, rubbing his nose against hers. 

“You promise me you’ll come back to us.” She asks, even though she knows it won’t a difference, she still wants to hear him say the words. 

“I promise you milady, I will return to you.” He vows. 

“I love you.” She tells him, blinking back tears as she lets him go and gently pushes him towards the door. 

“And I love you.” He kisses her one last time before going out the door and getting the horses ready. 

Regina sighs.

“I won’t let Rumple hurt him.” Belle tells Regina. 

“You won’t be able to stop him.” Regina replies with a sad, resigned smile, she appreciates the bookworm trying. 

Belle hesitates for a second before speaking again. 

“Emma told me what he did.” She finally says. “About the baby.” She clarifies. “I’m so sorry.” 

“It had nothing to do with you.” Regina tells her. 

“No, but I’m sorry all the same.” Belle continues. “That was the moment I knew I had to do this. He’s not the man I thought he was, anyone who could do such a thing to an innocent child…” 

She trails off but her disgust is evident. “Anyway, I guess I’ll see you in Storybrooke.” Belle says, hesitating again for a second before she awkwardly grabs Regina for a hug. 

“Good luck.” Regina pulls back from the hug.

“And to you.” Belle nods, exiting the cabin. 

Regina follows her out. 

Robin is waiting by her horse.

She looks at him for a long moment, then without saying anything, takes off her engagement ring and uses a little of Robin’s magic to conjure a silver chain. She puts the ring on the chain and hands it to him. 

“I don’t understand.” He frowns. “Have you changed your mind?” 

“No, never.” She reassures him. “But I want you to look after it for me and when all of this is over, bring it back to me.” She tells him.

He frowns, not quite understanding and the truth is, she’s not entirely sure she does either.

“I’ll see you back in Storybrooke.” He tells her with a smile, putting the chain around his neck. “Where I will return this to it’s rightful place.” 

After another kiss goodbye, he helps her to mount the horse, not an easy proposition in her condition and she watches as they both mount his and ride off towards the Dark Castle.

It takes every ounce of determination she has not to follow them, but she won’t put her child in any further danger. She trusts Robin, and the bookworm too in fact, they’ll get this done.


	61. Chapter 61

_Storybrooke_

“That’s it, keep pushing, I can see the head.” Whale urges. 

Regina flops back against the pillow, contraction over, breathing heavily. 

Granny wipes her forehead and pushes the hair back from her face. 

“You’re nearly there.” Granny tells her with a smile. 

Another contraction grips her before Regina can respond and she can’t do anything but give in to the overwhelming urge to bear down. 

“Regina!” Robin bursts into the room, taking everyone by surprise. 

He’s by Regina’s side in an instant with a quick nod of acknowledgement to Granny who’s on the other side of the bed to him. 

As the contraction subsides, Regina literally cries with relief. She grabs Robin’s face, pulling him down to kiss her. 

“You’re here.” She says, smile wide. “You’re ok.”

“I told you I would be.” He replies with a cheeky grin. 

“As touching as this reunion is, we’re kind of in the middle of something here.” Whale quips. 

“It’s not like I could forget.” Regina retorts, the last word coming out through gritted teeth as she bears down again. 

“I’ll leave you two to it.” Granny makes to leave.

Regina grabs her hand before she can go. 

“Or not.” Granny says, returning to her position at the other side of the bed from Robin. 

“Good.” Whale encourages her. “That’s it, the heads almost out.” He tells her. “Stop pushing and pant.” He instructs.

Regina does what he says, her face contorted into a grimace as she pants through the pain.

“That’s it.” Whale encourages. “Ok, that’s the head out. We’re going to need a big push on the next contraction.” 

Robin risks a glance down and his eyes widen in wonder. He hadn’t been present for Roland’s birth, he’d been away from camp and missed it.

“Nearly done now girl, that’s the hardest part over.” Granny encourages her. 

Regina’s pushing again as another contraction rips through her. She’s gripping both Granny and Robin’s hands so hard they’re both afraid something might break but neither says a word. 

“That’s it!” Whale continues to encourage her. “One more big push and the baby’s out.” 

She puts everything she has into it and then it’s over. 

It feels like an eternity of silence to her, and she’s plagued by the memories of the last time she gave birth to a child and how his cry never came, but then suddenly, a shrill, beautiful cry breaks the silence. 

“It’s a girl.” Whale declares. 

“Oh my god Regina, she’s so beautiful.” Robin kisses Regina’s forehead as tears stream down his face. 

The baby is wrapped up and handed to Regina who stares at her new daughter in amazement, tears welling up in her eyes. 

She gently strokes her daughter’s cheek with a finger, marvelling at everything about her. Ten fingers, ten toes. 

“She’s perfect.” Regina grins, tears of happiness falling. 

“Do you want to cut the cord dad?” Whale asks. 

Robin obliges, cutting between the two clamps Whale shows him. 

The two new parents are transfixed by their daughter, grinning happily as the study every inch of her. 

“I know it’s hard, but you’re going to have to let her go for a second so she can be properly checked over.” Whale tells them. “And you’re not quite done here.” He reminds Regina. 

“Robin go with her.” Regina anxiously instructs him to follow the nurse carrying their daughter to the other side of the room.

He does as she wishes and Granny stays by her side while the afterbirth is delivered. 

Robin brings the baby back to her mother once she’s been weighed and assessed and properly cleaned up. 

“She’s perfect.” He reassures Regina, handing their daughter to her. 

“Do you want me to go let everyone know?” Granny asks. “I don’t want to intrude on your family time.” 

“You’re part of this family.” Regina tells her with a smile. “Like it or not.” 

The old wolf is so touched she’s speechless. 

“Henry and Roland will be dying to come in I’ll bet.” Robin smiles. 

“I’ll go get them.” Granny smiles back. 

Suddenly Regina looks up to Robin. 

“Are you ok?” She asks worriedly. 

“I’m fantastic.” He grins, staring at his daughter. 

“But Gold, he had you…I saw what he was doing to you.” Regina protests.

“Emma healed me.” He explains. “None of that matters now. I’m here, she’s here, we’re all safe.” He kisses her. “Oh, and I have something that belongs to you.” He tells her, taking the now broken chain out of his pocket and taking the ring from it. “I’m returning it here in Storybrooke, as promised.”

Regina looks shocked.

“Assuming you still want it.” Robin falters for a second.

“Of course I do!” She beams. 

He places the ring on her finger again, back to it’s rightful place and kisses her again. 

There’s a knock at the door and Henry and Roland tentatively peek their heads round. 

“Come in and meet your little sister.” Robin tells them. 

They both run across the room, Granny following them in with Lucas in her arms, Little John has brought him straight to the hospital as soon as he’d gotten the call that they’d found Robin.

“She’s so tiny.” Henry’s awestruck as his new sister grips his finger in her little hand. 

“I’m gonna be the bestest big brother ever.” Roland declares as Robin picks him up and sits him on the bed. 

“Hey! That’s my job.” Henry jokes. 

“Mama why you sad?” Roland asks as he sees the tears streaming down Regina’s face. 

“I’m not baby.” She smiles at him. “I didn’t know I could be this happy.” She adds, barely more than a whisper.

Another knock on the door comes and Snow and David enter, closely followed by Hook and Emma. 

“Oh Regina, she’s so beautiful.” Snow gushes. 

“Congratulations mate.” Hook shakes Robin’s hand. 

A smile and a nod pass between Emma and Regina, no words needed.

“Wait, where’s Belle?” Regina asks, alarmed.

“She’s ok.” Snow tries her best to reassure Regina. “She just, she needed some time alone.” 

“What exactly happened?” Regina asks, suddenly very worried by the fact no one would tell her anything.

“We don’t need to talk about it just now.” Robin tries to deflect. 

“The crocodile’s not going to be a problem love, ever again.” Hook tries his best to reassure her. 

“He’s dead?” She gasps. 

“Not exactly.” Emma’s deliberately vague.

“I don’t understand.” Regina’s growing frustrated.

“We took the darkness out of him.” Emma explains. “It’s contained.”

“That didn’t exactly work last time.” Regina looks around at them all, worry evident. 

“I learned a trick or two from Merlin, it worked this time.” Emma declares confidently.

“Does she have a name?” Henry asks. It’s a deliberate attempt to redirect the conversation.

“We haven’t really talked about it yet.” Regina admits, she knows what he’s doing but she decides to go along with it after sending a look around the room conveying that they would talk more later. It was her fault she and Robin hadn’t talked about names, she’d refused to discuss it, afraid it would bring bad luck.

“I guess we should let you get some rest.” Snow says, ushering everyone out of the room.

“I’ll take the boys home.” Granny tells Regina. “We’ll have everything waiting for you when you get there.” She smiles. 

Regina hugs each of her boys with the arm not cradling her baby daughter, kissing each of them on the forehead and telling them she loves them. If it were possible she’d think her heart might be about to burst with happiness. She never thought she’d have this. 

“Any thoughts on a name then?” Robin asks, pulling her from her reverie once everyone had left. 

“I’m not sure.” She admits, still staring at their daughter in wonder. They made her. This perfect little thing. 

“What about Amy?” He suggests. 

“Amy.” She says and the baby gurgles as if in response. “I think she likes it.” Regina laughs. 

“Looks like Amy it is then.” Robin smiles. “And it also looks like Amy is hungry.” He says with a laugh.

“It does doesn’t it.” Regina smiles, rearranging the infant so she can nurse her. 

A few minutes pass, Regina looks from her daughter who’s contentedly suckling to her fiancé who’s watching them with a grin plastered across his face, no sign of the trauma he’d been through in the last few days. Her mind wandered to home where her 3 other children were safe and being cared for by a woman who for all intents and purpose was their Grandmother. She had a massive family, bigger than she could ever have imagined and she could have never believed Snow would be a part of it. Nothing would ever replace what she had lost along the way of course, part of her would always mourn for Noah and Caitlin, but she no longer felt the need to dwell on what wasn’t and she could finally focus on what was. She was happy and content in that moment but it was like her mind could not accept it and all she could think was that it was all going to come crashing down soon. 

“What are you thinking about?” Robin asks, smiling.

“How happy I am.” She tells him, it’s not a lie, it’s just not all of the truth. 

“Me too.” He kisses her. “I love you.” 

“I love you.” She tells him as they break away from the kiss. “I always will, no matter what.”


End file.
